The best Bipolar Disorder books: Reddit reviews

From 3.5 billion Reddit comments

An excellent book on this phenomenom is called Tribe by Sebastian Junger.

​

also plugging this book

ACT (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy)

Source: am psychotherapist.

Suggested workbook:

https://www.amazon.com/Get-Your-Mind-Into-Life/dp/1572244259/ref=nodl_

It’s not necessarily about being less “sensitive” or “emotional”, more so allowing yourself to feel, without judgment, and without necessarily having to react to that feeling.

There are a lot of cognitive behavioral therapy workbooks you can work through. There are a ton of them out there but the one they suggested in my clinical psych master's program for depression was this one: The Cognitive Behavioral Workbook for Depression: A Step-by-Step Program

I started Dialectical Behavior Therapy when my PTSD got unmanageable and it really helped. I like this workbook because it lets me do work to get better even when I am between therapists.

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1684034582/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_cKDgFbXXCR9A6

I mean, yes because no one here can predict the future or how you'll turn out. Dr. Kay Jamison wrote a best selling book, An Unquiet Mind, about being a clinical psychologist with Bipolar I Disorder, so obviously it can be done. However, your mental health and experience is different from hers and I'd recommend stabilizing the condition first, especially given the treatment resistance and its effect on your previous graduate studies. Are you engaged in CBT, ACT, or some other evidence-based practice for depression? It sounds like your doc is a psychiatrist or prescriber primarily. While a mood stabilizer is the first line treatment to stabilize mania, a Bipolar I depressive episode usually requires talk therapy as the primary treatment due to the risk of many SSRIs inducing a manic episode.

Edit: she's a clinical psychologist, not psychiatrist. My bad.

>I really don't know what I am doing wrong. She makes me out to be a sex-crazed monster when all I want is to have an intimate moment with my partner.

You probably arent doing anything "wrong". Abusers know what you want and withhold that from you to gain a position of power and control over you. To make you change and behave how they want you to behave in order to get to the goal post, then they move the posts. Its part of how the cycle of abuse works. And why its more like brainwashing and conditioning.

You cant change her. You cant make her trauma better. The only person that can do that is her. She has to take responsibility and accountability for her actions. I would recommend that you read Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist. It can help you to understand the way she is treating you is because of her not because of your actions or choices. That you are being used as a punching bag for how she feels. And you cant make that stop. You cant control that. You cant fix her. Love does not fix people. They have to take responsibility for themselves. Its the only way that works. And it takes time. I know thats now what we want. And its not fair, really, that a victim has to go through this part too, but trauma has to be treated like any other condition.

Buy this and read it https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

Arguing with a bpd doesn't lead anywhere. There is no reason for you to fight for a full week. Seriously, read the book. Then decide what you want to do. You deserve better.

She does exhibit some borderline traits. Amd gear of abandonment is a big one. A reaction that is exaggerated for the situation (like 500 angry text messages bc of 1 missed call.)

Keeping your boundaries firm is important. DBT is great for Borderline. It was created by a therapist who was diagnosed as Borderline.

Here's a self help workbook based on DBT strategies. Might help you cope. Hopefully, you can get her to see a psychiatrist if she isn't already.

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, ... (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1684034582/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_R9734HGECMVJJ46T0S6N

Read this if you haven't, it will help a little bit: https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

It's quite sad for them. There's no denying that. They never asked to have that disorder.

A "successful relationship" with a pwBPD means a calm one, extraordinarily rarely does it mean a supportive romantic partnership. Is that what you're wanting for the rest of your life, to take care of someone who is ill while never having your needs met? Whether you would say yes or no, I'd highly recommend reading this book, which will help you set the necessary boundaries to have a baseline relationship:

Stop Caretaking the Borderline or Narcissist: How to End the Drama and Get On with Life https://www.amazon.com/dp/1442238321/

Just gonna hijack your comment to add, I saw a CBT therapist through the NHS and he was extremely helpful but CBT didn't entirely work for me. Fortunately he was also training in ACT (acceptance and commitment therapy) which is fairly similar to CBT being evidence based but with some counter-intuitive tricks and whatnot. If one type of therapy doesn't work for you, try another, and if you don't like your therapist after a couple sessions you can leave without them being offended (and if they do get offended you've dodged a bullet and made the right move leaving and looking for another therapist). If you can't afford a therapist here's the book I worked through with my own: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/1572244259/ref=oh_aui_search_detailpage?ie=UTF8&psc=1

I would do it and then bring the things to my partner and talk about it

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation, ... (A New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1684034582/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_10R20FYHY2EAF0JHV6RF

You gray rock... And you talk to a lawyer instead of a therapist. I also highly recommend (really highly) the book "stop caretaking the borderline..." https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

It will allow you to understand the dynamics.

It sounds like he hates his job or being out in the world. He wakes up in a good mood and then after a few hours of being out in the world and dealing with people/traffic/life, he comes home angry and takes it out on you.

I totally get how it's helpful to you to understand what's going on emotionally for him, but it's also really important to make it clear that you shouldn't have to accept verbal abuses because he has trouble handling his emotions. It sort of sounds like the family waits on your dad and dances around his emotions ("we give him food and lunch for him to eat"). I know it's tough when you're young because you're kind of stuck with your parents, but it's still important for you to understand that it's not your job to fix his emotions and it's also not your job to take his abuse.

This book is technically about BPD, but a lot of the info can be helpful for those of us living in a household with anger. It really helped me understand the emotional rollercoaster that is going on behind the scenes: https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Walking-Eggshells-Borderline-Personality/dp/1684036895

Bipolar and BPD have similarities but they’re not the same - I’d recommend doing some research on them, and seeing where you might be measuring up. Instant mood shifts and what you’re describing as “splitting” are both symptoms of BPD, if this has been a reoccurring issue with you (as you’ve said it is) then that’s just a bit frustrating if your therapist is brushing your concerns off.

I’d also suggest looking into DBT therapy - if you’re not interested in sessions (individual or group) or can’t afford them (it’s unfortunately expensive) then definitely consider picking up a workbook for yourself. I’ve found the McKay workbook the most helpful personally.

First of all: cover your ass. Record and document. If she is abusive now, it will be way worse once she knows you are really going through with the divorce so get ready for her to dysregulate (ie: go crazy)

Second: if you think that "oh she is a good mom" and "she isn't always that bad", once you divorce and for months after, your brain will seem to rewire itself and the past won't be as rosy.. you were basically living in fog (fear, obligation, guilt)

Give this book a read, it will confirm what you intend to do: https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

The book "splitting" by Bill eddy is also worth it

DO NOT fall in her trap where she tries to be nice and all at first, she is likely trying to screw you over. She likely has a bit of NPD as well, this covers it https://youtu.be/7vxSxa967BA

If she ever hits you (or harasses you, death threats, ..), try to have evidence and definitely file a police report. You'll hopefully get a restraining order which will help you keep your sanity.

She would not hesitate to throw you under the bus. Cover your ass and do what you need to do.

Be there for the kids. They'll also realise how toxic the household was but it may take them a few months. The mom won't help because she will paint you black but eventually it will work out and they will finally have some stability in their lives.

That shows how it was purely manipulation.

I say cover your ass: record and document. She will only escalate once she realises that you are really done. Mine ended up assaulting me at my workplace... same age as yours. Pretty messed up. She was not violent before. I say read the book "Splitting" by bill eddy and this one https://www.amazon.ca/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

I noticed that every time I was away from the house for >24 hrs I was happier. I then realized that I dreaded coming home and whatnot and things fell in place in my mind. Got fed up and said I want a divorce.. shit hit the fan. Suicide threats, cops at my house a bunch of times, children's aid society involvement, hospitalization in the psych ward, she assaulted me at my workplace and ended up with a no contact order but she breached her conditions, ..

Then it clicked over time. All the little episodes that had happened in the previous 19 years. Tantrums here and there. I read that book and it opened my eyes even more: https://www.amazon.ca/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321 I was just a caretaker and was being abused by someone with BPD/NPD. I should have clued in when she told me "Watch out if you ever leave me, it will be like a tornado".

Here's one! You can potentially find past editions for even less money. Also, check out bookfinder.com for other sellers with potentially lower prices, discounted older editions, charitable uses for funds generated by sales, etc.

Just have to find productive things to do to keep your mind busy.

If you don't have the motivation to do said things, try starting a journal about your day to day activities or why you're feeling the way you do.

Self therapy books are also a big help. I enjoyed this one

Positive thinking is within reach; hang in there!

Things I do which help:

Take a walk outside with headphones and an audiobook like once a week. Go somewhere you like for the only reason that you like it.

Went to the doc and got antidepressants. On my second try now bc the first ones didn't work.

Therapy. Most difficult one to start bc it meant telling my pain to a stranger. Also extremely helpful. I opened my mouth and said what my hopes and goals were. Realistic ones. When looking for a therapist, I give it one meeting. If we don't click, I'm out.

CBT Workbook for Depression. It's on amazon here

I did all these at approximately the same time, at my low and they all played a big role in kicking me in the ass out of the black haze and into some semblance of order and life.

Then I downloaded 12 Rules for Life: An Antidote to Chaos and listened to that on car rides bc I love taking car rides, and it made me excited to live again.

The other day for my audiobook walk I wanted to go to this one trail I like, but it is half hour drive away. So realistic me was like, "Just use the trail up the road, it's 2 min away and more practical. Don't waste gas driving to the other trail, its all woods." Then I thought about it and you know what? It isn't a waste of gas. I WANT to go to the trail I like better, that's perfectly reasonable. I don't have to sacrifice every little tiny thing to practicality and convenience for others.

I started doing little creative things just because. Coloring with my kids, playing my musical instruments, bought a couple house plants that weren't in the budget JUST because I wanted them and they make me happy. I've wanted plants for a long time. I did it! And you know what? Grocery budget was tighter because of the $50 but my home is happier and I'm happier.

Thanks for asking. I love helping people out. This concept comes from Dialectical Behavior Therapy or DBT. I like pulling from the DBT Skills workbook. Here's a link to the book.

I also use the worksheet on therapistaid.com to help visualize this concept. Here's the link

The only thing I'd include is an additional circle for the body. Sometimes, our body has important information like a tightness in the chest, or pit in the stomach, or a headache. That information is also valuable to bring to the negotiation table as well.

With this concept, I stress the importance of experience. You have a ton of wisdom inside you already. Practice, practice, practice, practice! It will help shape your perspective so this concept becomes like muscle memory.

There's a really good book for people like us called Stop Caretaking the Narcissist or Borderline

Also check out the Narcissistic Abuse sub

It really does. I recommend going through and doing a workbook as you wait to get therapy, or even while you get therapy. It will help show you the ways you're unintentionally making things worse. Here's a good one for OCD: https://smile.amazon.com/OCD-Workbook-Breaking-Obsessive-Compulsive-Disorder/dp/1572249218/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=ocd+workbook&qid=1611442175&sprefix=ocd+&sr=8-3

(And I have harm, too. Mine, thankfully, is self harm so I recognize that I'm honestly fortunate in that way.)

It sounds like you've been through a lot and you are trying to work on yourself and improve and heal. That's really brave and so hard! Self love and believing you are worthy of forgiveness and respect and compassion begins with giving it to yourself first, freely and repeatedly, and it is a huge step in your journey and will be a huge relief if you can get there.

I really really recommend trying to find some counseling so you don't have to face your fears and demons alone. I don't know what you've been through but it sounds like there's been loss, drugs, and you may be battling seriously low self-worth. It's beyond valuable to have someone neutral and trained to point out your patterns and show you other perspectives and options. If counseling isn't an option, this book was great for me: Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life. I also loved A New Earth.

I'm glad you are investing time and energy in healing, growing and learning from your past. It is extremely hard and extremely worth it!

She may have Borderline Personality Disorder. One of the symptoms is memory loss. She's still morally culpable for her actions.

I recommend reading the first chapter of this book: https://www.amazon.com/Stop-Caretaking-Borderline-Narcissist-Drama/dp/1442238321

Hi. I've been diagnosed with BPD. For me personally, the diagnosis did help. I had no clue what was wrong with me until then, and giving a label, although I see why it can be problematic, was so helpful to me.

However, unless your symptoms are very severe they aren't likely to do much even with the diagnosis.

The best thing I've done for my BPD was practise DBT skills. You can do this without a therapist (although a therapist is very much recommended). Check out this DBT workbook which has been invaluable to me. Even if you are wrong, and don't have BPD, DBT skills can help everyone imo.

I found this book (the language and exercises) really helpful! I also have the anxiety book from the same peeps.

https://www.amazon.ca/dp/1572249218/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_glt_i_WW3XQ82PG07CJMRPAM62?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1

My psychologist has me reading the DBT workbook and Trauma and Recovery.

I actually own this one (was purchased for non-pregnancy reasons): https://www.amazon.com/Dialectical-Behavior-Therapy-Skills-Workbook/dp/1684034582/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=dbt+workbook&qid=1624231251&sr=8-3