I've been there. You have to realize that she's got a hurricane going on inside of her. Some people internalize it, some people externalize it, and it sounds like she is the former. It sucks. It's OK to be honest with her, but do so from a place of empathy for what she's going though (and with the knowledge that you can't possibly know what it's like for her). It's not that pregnancy gives someone a free pass to check out of their role in a relationship, but it can be scary as hell, and people deal with that kind of fear differently.
Talking to a therapist or counselor might well be your best bet here, because (a) you say you're experiencing depression, (b) you can vent without feeling like you're attacking your partner and (c) those feelings of fear and inadequacy about being a husband and father are things therapists have dealt with in other soon-to-be fathers, and they can definitely help you overcome them.
My situation may be very different from yours, but I definitely had some of the same fears you do. I once heard somebody say that childbirth is the most amazing thing that's happened to every single person on Earth. Fatherhood is the same. Just because your fears are common doesn't make them any less valid or painful. Talking to someone can help you get real context and understanding of them and keep you from making a decision in the moment that might have long-term consequences.
Once the baby is here, you might also check out And Baby Makes Three, which deals with how to maintain your relationship after the birth of a child. A good friend is a therapist and frequently recommends it to new parents.
Https://www.amazon.com/Make-Mead-Like-Viking-Wild-Fermented/dp/1603585982
I haven't read it but I know the author goes into detail about brewing from wild yeast present in the honey and the environment. Probably how vikings did it.
One of the reasons I like mead is because I like to pretend that I'm a viking haha.
What /u/Luvagoo said - when you roll your pancetta to hang, that shit's gotta be tight. Also, I'm worried your avg temp was too high at 64 degrees. I'm sure it's fine to cook, but for your next hang, lower to 55F-ish. You could also start with a higher RH. I started by reading Ruhlan as well, then moved on to Marianski's HPQMS. I highly suggest you do the same, much more into the science behind the cure.
I just read “And Baby Makes Three” which has some good ideas for communication for new parents- May help some with the parental stress parts amazon link
Home canning is fun and makes delicious food, but it requires precise following of safety-related recipes. Follow only tested modern recipes & techniques. The National Center for Home Food Preservation has a ton of excellent information: https://nchfp.uga.edu/.
Botulism is relatively rare but is deadly and mostly a result of improperly processed low-acid home-canned foods. It does not necessarily make the food smell or taste 'off.'
Modern pressure canners are great, have better safety features than old canners, and are the only way to safely home can low-acid foods like beans, corn, potatoes, soups, carrots & meats.
Water-bath canning is for high-acid foods like fruit, many tomato recipes (but not all as modern tomatoes are often bred for lower acid levels) and tested recipes from a reliable source that use an acidifying agent in the proper amounts (salsa, pickles, relishes).
The National Center for Home Food Preservation (link above) and The Ball Blue Book (get the current edition) are two great resources. Here's an Amazon link to The Blue Book: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00OEJZSNW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_PCZcFbN6XPC5Y
If you're really into it, your local university extension service may have a Master Food Preserver program to look into. It's like the Master Gardener Program but for food preservation.
Marianskis for sure. Kutas is good but these guys are the best. They do both imperial and metric, Kutas does imperial only. The most thorough, comprehensive and accurate.
Second vote for Katz's The Art of Fermentation more accessible for the home cook than the Noma one.
For sausages though, The Art of Making Fermented Sausages by Stanley Marianski is legendary in charcuterie circles.
It's a recipe out of Fermented Vegetables. You basically make chimmichurri as usual except instead of vinegar, you ferment it. And you don't add oil until you serve it.
Get these two books for your canning library, “Ball Blue Book” and “Putting Food By”. All the recipes are tested as safe.
Ball Blue Book Guide To Preserving, 37Th Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00OEJZSNW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_UM6PBb8H1ND8Z
Putting Food By: Fifth Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/0452296226/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_tai_EN6PBbZ81VD2Q
I've contacted three different Ag schools, and the USDA and they all say balls recipes are fine. These may be the books they were recommending https://www.amazon.com/All-Ball-Book-Canning-Preserving/dp/0848746783/ref=sr_1_3?crid=11QQ89FMSWAAS&dchild=1&keywords=ball+canning+book&qid=1629475610&sprefix=ball+ca%2Caps%2C201&sr=8-3 And: https://www.amazon.com/Ball-Complete-Book-Home-Preserving/dp/0778801314/ref=sr_1_4?crid=11QQ89FMSWAAS&dchild=1&keywords=ball+canning+book&qid=1629475610&sprefix=ball+ca%2Caps%2C201&sr=8-4
This is the bible: Home Production of Quality Meats and Sausages.
Not a polished, coffee table book. Just no nonsense, and incredibly detailed primer on making sausages and curing meats. It includes lots of recipes, many of which you can also find on their website.
Charcuterie: The Craft of Salting, Smoking, and Curing (Revised and Updated) https://www.amazon.com/dp/0393240053/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_9JbiDb82S780M
This book is amazing, i have a 15lb ham hanging in my dining room drying. I used their basic dry cure, pulsed about 5 ancho Chiles in a magic bullet until they were powder put the cure on the belly flipped every other day for 5-7 days pulled it out of the bags, cut a piece rinsed and fried it to check my salt level(at this point you can let it cure longer they say up to 10 days but it gets super salty. After you’re happy with your salt level rinse thoroughly and pat dry let sit in fridge(or the garage if it’s cold out, hence why i like doing it in January/February) over night suspended and uncovered. Then cold smoke for about 16 hours on applewood(I’m a big fat cheater and use the masterbuilt cold smoking attachment about $50 on amazon and cut a hole in a 55gallon drum absolutely perfect setup) if you’re afraid it’s gonna get too warm keep a tub of ice in the bottom.
It depends on what veggie you are canning/pickling as to how to properly do it. I generally would not bother canning anything if you are not going to pickle it also, otherwise you will end up with pretty much the same product you can get at the store in the canned veggie aisle. I never have any problems with pickles having a good shelf life as long as I can them too. It doesn't take long to boil process a jar of pickled veggies, usually a 10 min boil will do it. If you really want to keep pickled items firm at the end of canning I recommend using pickle crisp. it is an additive you place in each jar that keeps the pickles firm. It is pure calcium chloride. This replaces (mostly) the older process of "liming" the pickled items. Liming involved a soak in pickling lime (calcium hydroxide). After an over night soak you need to soak in cold water and rinse several times to remove the pickling lime. I will tell you from experience that this produces a pickle chip (do not use for whole cucumbers) that are as firm as the day they were picked. Even after extended pickling and canning. It involves much more work than the pickle crisp, but the results are a little better if you don't mind the extra time and work. I generally use pickle crisp now because it allows me to do smaller, more custom batches, instead of organizing everything for a mass process. Since if you lime, it takes the same work to do 1 pound as it does 20, so you normally go big. For pickle crisp you can go a jar at a time if you choose. I also would recommend buying the Ball canning book (The Blue Book). It has many details on how to can and pickle most items. Good luck! https://www.amazon.com/All-Ball-Book-Canning-Preserving/dp/0848746783/ref=sr_1_4?dchild=1&keywords=ball+canning+book&qid=1595091145&sr=8-4
Someone mentioned Sandor Katz's book "The Art of Fermentation", which is basically the bible of fermentation. However, it reads more like a textbook - a reference manual to consult from time to time. If you're looking for something a little more modern with nice pictures and great recipes, I'd recommend these - I own both, and have tried several of the recipes with very tasty results.
https://smile.amazon.com/dp/1612124259/
https://smile.amazon.com/Fiery-Ferments-Stimulating-Fermented-Condiments/dp/1612127282/
I'm a newbie also. I've started out with apple juice. I just bought a bunch from costco and went from there. It might be a bit easier as it's pasteurized from the factory and you don't have to deal with microbes and the such that would be on the skin of apples.
If you go with apple juice, make sure that it's only preservatives is vitamin c.
Also a good place to read up is this book. I read it first before making my first cider.
https://www.amazon.ca/New-Cider-Makers-Handbook-Comprehensive/dp/1603584730
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Suggestion: On the Wiki page, maybe add Fermented Vegetables?
You are doing refrigerator recipes not actually "canning". Doing frig pickles a ratio of 1.5 cups water to 1 cup vinegar is safe, they will keep for several weeks. When doing frig stuff I just wash my jars and lids like a normal dish, if you start canning stuff you have to sterilize everything. When you are canning and leaving stuff at room temperature is where the problem of spoilage comes in. Doing frig stuff I have never had anything go bad as long as I eat it within 2-3 weeks.
This is the bible of canning, it has a ton of great recipes that have all been tested and approved so you know that you wont get sick. I has both frig, canned and fermented recipes. It goes over how to safely do everything and explains ph levels and all that good stuff.
This is pretty much from the horses mouth.
The easiest and best book I used to get started was “Charcuterie, the craft of salting, smoking, and curing”. I think that is the gateway for a lot of people in the game.
https://www.amazon.com/Charcuterie-Salting-Smoking-Revised-Updated/dp/0393240053
I’ll have to check that out. I started using the recipe from Ruhlman’s Charcuterie and then it evolved as I learned about equilibrium brining from Modernist Cuisine and other places. Then I accidentally left it go too long due to time constraints and liked the way it came out. I generally do about 12 days and then wash and let it dry out on racks in fridge for 2 days.
A lot of folks just take an old fridge and outfit it with some Inkbird controllers. One controller for temp if using a traditional compressor based fridge (though this can be omitted if using a wine fridge that already operates in the desired temp range), and one controller for humidity which gets connected to a humidifier and/or dehumidifier placed inside the fridge.
Learn about the process and follow a recipe from a reputable source and you are on your way.
If you don't mind a textbook like read and deep dive into the topic, this book is the go to for all things Charcuterie.
My wife is using recipes from a book called, Fermented Vegetables by Kirsten K. Shockey and Christopher Shockey.
There are tons of recipes for different krauts, but she like the basic naked kraut.
This is the book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.ca/Fermented-Vegetables-Creative-Fermenting-Chutneys/dp/1612124259/ref=asc_df_1612124259/?tag=googlemobshop-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=292951821317&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=7160782588753962029&hvpone=&hvptw...
Jesus that is a long link. Fermented Vegetables.... Kirsten and Christopher Shockey.
Unless you like mushy pickles, I wouldn't recommend pressure canning them. A plain water bath would be preferable, or sous vide at a lower temp for much more time (130F for 3 hours).
Definitely marinara and other tomato sauces. I usually just pressure can the tomatoes after skinning them. That way I have a plain tomato base that I can make anything else with. Tomato paste is another good one.
I also pressure can mustards, jam, salsa, and relish.
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Ball has a canning book I recommend:
Any and all of the Ball books are detailed in their methods and how-tos, so any should be fine! Personally I have this one, but truly any will be ok:
If I had to pick just one it would be this one. It is easier to read than the Ball Blue Book and is a little more comprehensive.
https://www.amazon.com/Ball-Complete-Book-Home-Preserving/dp/0778801314
If you're newish to canning this is not a good starting point. The ball canning books are a great start. [This book is my go to. https://smile.amazon.com/dp/0778801314/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_D22BQRMJYV4JFY3VKC86]()
This is the book for canning.. it is basically a bible for starters... Ball Complete Book of Home Preserving https://www.amazon.com/dp/0778801314/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_6KGDMAGW724B7XTWZXKX
I grew up in the lifestyle, so alot of it was hand me down knowledge.
Animal husbandry & butchering is not something I have a resource on because that was entirely handed down.
I highly recommend ball canning lids over the off brand ones.. they just seal the best.
I also recommend the ball pressure canner, and any large pot will water bath items just fine so ypu dont have to buy a water bath canner specifically.
Other than that find a local farmer/orchard in your area and become buddies.
I get all my fruit for free because I developed a trade/work agreement with a local orchard owner..
I learned alot directly from other farmers too.. and we swap recipes/meat smoking ideas etc.
My husband and I are going to convert our old upright freezer into a smoker this summer.. really excited about that.
We have a mods-curated list of recommended books in our sidebar. You may want to check it. My personal recommendation is Marianskis book for sure.