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My suggestion would be to set up a security camera first.
EDIT: Also, if you want to set up a sacrificial package for the thieves to steal I suggest getting sugar-free gummy bears.
It’s not in most peanut butters, though. It’s in the high protein kinds that are like 5x the cost of normal peanut butter. While you shouldn’t feed your dog Skippy or Jiff because of the sugar, salt, and oils... for Xylitol poisoning, it would have to be P28, Go Nuts, Protein Plus, or the like.
You really only find high concentrations in products like these gummy bears (read the reviews): Sugar Free Gummy Bear 1LB Bag https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00IF3DUW4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glc_fabc_cH8-Fb99SS4GD
ETA: Xylitol is a specific kind of sugar alcohol and can also be listed as Maltitol in the US.
It's Kracie Gumi Tsureta, a sugary powder mixed that turns into a gummy in that liquid.
My friend had a few of those. Nothing to ride home about. Tasted like wet sugary powder... I dunno how to say it. My friend liked it. I didn't :P
Then again, I really like Gushers, and my friends don't.
You can buy it in the U.S. on Amazon (free shipping).
That's considered intentional poisoning. It's a bad idea.
Get a big bag of sugar free gummy bears instead. Fail to hide them. It's common knowledge they act as a super laxative, but I doubt he'd be able to resist them.
This bag, for instance, has these gems under it:
> Question: Should i try them?
Answer: It depends. Do you like painful and explosive diarrhea? If yes then this is the snack for you.
By William Scott on January 26, 2015
> Question: What exactly is a serving size?
Answer: Serving Size is 17 pieces (40g) However, I recommend you first sniff the open bag at a 100 yards safe distance. If your gut doesn't start gurgling and flip flopping you might be safe enough to actually get close enough to remove a gummy bear from the bag making sure to use a face mask, tongs and rubber gloves. If the removal of said bear is successful without any fluid drainage from your lower orifice you might possibly consider licking an ear but please make sure all your final business is in order ie... last will and testament, DNR instructions, burial wishes etc... Seriously Andrew, why test fate?
By Kindle Customer on January 31, 2014
And for more comedy gold, read the reviews.
Truly an excellent example of modern rhetoric and prose. The writers of tomorrow aren't training in colleges and writing schools- no, they're busy writing Amazon reviews about sugar free gummy bears.
We're still working on whether artificial sweeteners cause a spike in insulin in humans. At the moment, there isn't solid science to back it up and a lot of it is speculation and anecdotal stories. We've only got tests on flies and mice. Along with that, very little of the sweeteners reach the pancreas and there is no glucose involved with this situation at all.
They do make you poop though. Enjoy if you have yet to partake!
Here is the Link to the Product Listing if anyone is interested in reading the reviews. They are absolutely hilarious!
Albanese Candy, Sugar Free Assorted Fruit Gummi Bears, 5-pound Bag
Expand their horizons. Be creative. Find a local BDSM club and tell them that you joined. Tell them you're thinking of eating edible insects and maybe some Kopi Luwak to drink with them. (It's awful, trust me). See what you can get them to do and have some fun.
My next order would be this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00DE4GWWY
I know it would be $20'ish wasted, but my hope would be after a day of stealing boxes, they open this puppy up and have themselves a nice big handful and relax for a bit.
EDIT: If you haven't heard of these little delish bears, check out some of the rave reviews!
Sugar-free gummy bears. Read the Amazon reviews. Seriously, it's not something you'd want to do if you weren't constipated. It probably will work for you.
https://www.amazon.com/Sugar-Gummy-Bears-Albanese-Confectionery/dp/B00CMS97YS?th=1
Please read the reviews here and reassess that statement :D
So, in case you’ve never heard the story of sugar free haribo gummy bears, they are supposed to have an effect on your bowels.
If you’ve never read the reviews on Amazon for them, I highly recommend. Do yourselves a favor and read the reviews. I die laughing everytime and totally forgot about it until your post. Thanks! Haha
Enjoy.
https://www.amazon.com/Sugar-Gummy-Bears-Albanese-Confectionery/dp/B00CMS97YS
Have you never heard of the huge bag of sugar-free gummy bears? I guess amazon doesn't sell Haribo brand in 5-pound bags anymore, but some of the reviews on the Albanese brand are funny. https://www.amazon.com/Albanese-Candy-Assorted-Sugar-Free-Flavor/dp/B00DE4GWWY/ref=sr_1_3_a_it?ie=UTF8&qid=1535324360&sr=8-3&keywords=sugar+free+gummy+bears+haribo+5+pound+bag
Really, you all need to go on Amazon and read the reviews of Haribo sugar-free gummy bears. It's a new definition of explosive diarrhea.
Edit: Here's the link. Enjoy.
https://www.amazon.com/Sugar-Free-Gummy-Bear-1LB/dp/B00IF3DUW4/ref=sr_1_5?crid=11HG6PX5LYELU&dchild=1&keywords=haribo+sugar+free+gummy+bears&qid=1600195807&sprefix=haribo+su%2Caps%2C131&sr=8-5
It’s true! If you want to laugh, read the Amazon reviews of sugar-free gummies 😂 Sugar Free Gummy Bears, 5LBS by Albanese Confectionery https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00CMS97YS/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_DQNhFbNBZVTWC
it depends on how significant $100 is to you.
if it's the difference between making ends meet or not, then stocking up your pantry seems like a reasonable choice
if it's a significant "extra", then buying something special for yourself, family, or significant other you would not otherwise pay for may be the way to go. split it 50/50 with your significant other and figure out a gift to purchase each other.
if it's an amount that would barely be visible in your checking account, buying something fun/silly, or hobby-related would be an interesting way to go. there's a 5lb gummy bear in amazon.
From one Amazon bulk candy fiend to another: you've got to try Priming the Albanese gummy bears [not an affiliate link pinky swear]. They are 👌👌👌
Not a super weird item but the top reviews for it are a great read lol
5 pounds of Sugar free gummy bears
Thanks for the contest! Wishlist
If you want to try a variety of things then ento market is probably going to be your best bet. I've heard good things about them, though I've never ordered from there personally. They have lots of different kinds of insects so you can order a little bit of everything to try them out. I think crickets are a good place to start as they're really versatile. They can be tossed with oil and seasonings to make snacks (or bought pre-seasoned), substituted into many dishes if you just order the dry roasted kind (cricket stir-fry anyone?), and they can even be powdered and used as a high-protein flour substitute for baking.
There's actually also a surprising amount of insects available on amazon. You could get something like this if you want to get a variety pack. I would shop around on both sites and compare prices. Be careful with the pictures and read the package weight carefully, as a lot of times the pictures for insect products make it look a lot larger than it actually is.
Btw, malitol is also what they use in sugar free gummi bears. You should read some of these reviews.
These reviews are also just too good. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00CMS97YS/ref=cm_cr_dp_d_vote_lft?ie=UTF8&voteInstanceId=R22LA4EA9C7RRQ&voteValue=1&csrfT=ghO%2B0sLDofZViFPgcAH1HwO8EjZQYBzm%2BVKy2%2FgAAAABAAAAAF83WeVyYXcAAAAA%2B4kUEk%2F7iMGR3xPcX6iU&returnFromLogin=1&th=1#customerReviews
As long as they weren't the sugar free gummy bears on Amazon.
You can get those on amazon actually they're called 5 Lbs of Sugar Free Gummy Bears:
https://www.amazon.com/Sugar-Gummy-Bears-Albanese-Confectionery/dp/B00CMS97YS
The reviews have some pretty legit comedic writing
Even the infamous maltilol gummy bears don't make people vomit, even after consuming significantly higher doses than what you ate.
I'm not a doctor, but I'd wager money on 'it was something else'.