Living in the moment, with no thought of future consequences of one's actions or inactions, is a fundamental characteristic of a psychopath. Add it to his constant lying, lack of empathy, and grandiose self-image. The sooner the public is educated about psychopathy, the better.

1 in 100 is a psychopath. That's over 3 million in the US. The odds are good you know one personally. Do not confuse it with a mental illness. It is a structural brain defect, and cannot be treated.

For more on psychopathy, I recommend <em>Without Conscience</em> by Dr. Robert Hare, who developed the clinical test for identifying psychopaths.

YTA my wife has also been diagnosed with BPD and has spent her own time in facilities. Learn about your wife's disorder. I recommend this book specifically written for those of us that find ourselves close to someone with the disorder.

It's not gonna magically make everything alright. But if you're anything like me, you're gonna find the righteousness of your righteous anger will start to melt. You're gonna start to understand why she acts the way she does, because you'll finally be able to understand why she thinks the way she does. And you'll learn how to handle it differently.

Once she's out make sure she gets into some sort of DBT program. Hospital stays do about Jack shit without continuous follow-up.

I just started cognitive behavior therapy this year. Helped a bit, but ended up on Prozac to help with numerous panic episodes.

This book has helped tremendously in normalizing thoughts and shutting down the automatic anxiety thought process : The Anxiety and Worry Workbook: The Cognitive Behavioral Solution https://www.amazon.com/dp/160623918X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_rAmuBb59CFAB8

Highly recommend it to anyone suffering from anxiety or panic. It isn't an easy path, but the book has techniques to feel less isolated and manage your mind

Can I recommend to you the book Taking Charge of Adult ADHD? Whenever I have any relief from severe depression, this book is my bible. I can scan in a few important pages for you tomorrow if you want, but honestly if you have any bookstores or libraries nearby with a seating area, definitely seek it out and read as much as you can to see if you can read it comfortably (while medicated).

&gt; How do some of you deal with this sort of thing?

go to T H E R A P Y

Seriously. I did two years of monthly sessions with an extremely good therapist to learn not just to heal from the trauma but to learn the emotional skills my Christian parents refused to or were unable to teach me.

&gt; What can I do to calm myself down.

For $25 you can buy Mind Over Mood which includes many techniques to fight this sort of panic. In the meantime try box breathing.

It is okay to be afraid, it is okay to be sad, it is okay to be angry. When these feelings intrude into your actions and make life worse for you, it is a good sign that you would benefit from talking to a therapist. I believe in you. You are competent and strong. You deserve to be happy.

Seriously. Learning about basic Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy improved my life immensely, even though I wouldn't meet the clinical DSMV criteria for an anxiety or depressive disorder diagnosis.

I just liked the book's title. I mean, who doesn't want to control the way they feel?

Ironically, one of the most helpful things in the book was these little vignettes about the internal monologue of a character who has major depression. They made me realize that my intrusive thoughts and irrational worries are nothing special. In fact, they are literally textbook examples.

So previously the diagnosis was split into ADD and ADHD, as far as i understand, but it's now an ADHD diagnosis that can fall under innatentive type, hyperactive type, or the multi type like you and I. There's some really great books on ADHD on this list here as well as this one my psychologist recommended

in the short term, i've found the short comics made by ADHD alien (posted on twitter and their website under that name) really helpful for understanding some of my experiences. I've only been officially diagnosed for about a year and a half, and it's been a crazy learning curve. I still have a massive 'OH!' moment about once a month where something new clicks into place about why i'm Like That.

I hope you find something that makes sense for you though, and if you need to talk about anything feel free to inbox me :)

That's good to hear! I did therapy as part of my education and I'd recommend it to anyone.

Are you working on this issue in therapy? In that case I'd maybe check with them for suggestions, or what they think about you doing it parallel to treatment. I'd suggest you don't take my advice over your therapist if they'd disagree with it.

As for books - it's a little tough since the manuals and books I rely on are in Swedish or by Swedish authors. Here's some I found from a quick search though that I dare recommend:

The Anxiety and Worry handbook - pretty comprehensive guide to all kind of anxiety and worry related issues. Easy to recommend since Aaron Beck is a co-author (founder of CBT).

Mind over Mood - not familiar with the authors but looks good. Authors are cognitive therapists from what I can tell.

If you look up those books you'll see suggestions for others as well. My suggestion would be going to your local library and see if any of them are available, or look for similiar books (just check that they are written by psychologist or about a treatment method, not self-help or inspiration). CBT is pretty uniform and any decent book will have a similiar theoretical framework and pretty similiar methods. The best one will be the one you want to keep reading :)

I had those.

Therapy helps a LOT. Specifically CBT skills of identifying, disagreeing with, and stopping narratives put into your head by others. The book Mind Over Mood teaches this skill as well.

Yeah! It's called Taking Charge of Adult ADHD. It's one of the most helpful things I've read since being diagnosed a couple years ago. Really explains how executive dysfunction works, as well as a lot of other helpful info. https://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Adult-Russell-Barkley/dp/1606233386/

Hey mate I feel your pain and I am going through this currently... For the past 20 odd years to be fair. For me I sought councilling and I'm I was recommended a book which helps 90% of the time. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/1572305614?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

It is a long struggle mate and I feel for you but so far this has helped me lose over 7stone (47kg) (106+ lbs). I recommend the book or at least councilling.

Not OP but Mind Over Mood was the book I used during and after my CBT in university.

Awesome!!! That's a HUGE step forward! If you haven't progressed to booking a therapist yet, that's ok. It seems like you're pretty self-motivated; I would recommend looking into cognitive behavioral therapy workbooks like this one: https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Worry-Workbook-Cognitive-Behavioral/dp/160623918X

There are also similar courses on Udemy and Coursera, which have the added benefit of videos/audio if that helps you learn more easily.

Remember, it can be a quick saunter down to rock bottom, but it's a long way back, and it's okay to slip and stumble your way through self-improvement. I, an anonymous internet stranger, am ridiculously proud of you!

Taking Charge of Adult ADHD

This book was recommended by my doctor who specializes in ADHD and has an ADHD child. He recommends it for parents (and kids when they grow up.) He (my doctor) just gets it, if you know what I mean. This book is practical and amazingly helpful. My doctor said it was the best book on ADHD.

Good luck and congratulations on your daughter's success! That is sincerely so awesome!!!!! 🎉🎉🎊🎊🎈🎈🥳🥳

So I always suspected Teddi's company was just her eating disorder as a program, but holy cow. I had intensive treatment a few years ago for a decades-long ED, and this program is exactly what it is like to have an ED. It's insane how many strangers have been walking around with the exact same thoughts in their heads, same style of self-criticism (and again, what the coaches say and their relentless rigid thinking about "doing better"- in my head, when i was sick, I called that "voice of reason" ana...) and sadly, self-destruction in the name of "self-improvement". Emily is really doing the Lord's work and honoring the voices of sufferer's tremendously. If anyone is being triggered by this stuff or confused, this book is very helpful for any disordered eating and of course please try to see a medical doctor or psychologist any time you need to <3 https://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Binge-Eating-Second-Program/dp/1572305614

Hmm....chronic lack of motivation, severely underperforming, giving up too easily, ended up far below the projected potential. That's literally me. Have you ever checked yourself for undiagnosed ADHD? It doesn't matter if you got good grades in high school. A lot of people with ADHD develop coping strategies when they are in school, but performing well takes so much more effort compared to 'normal people' that they burn out completely in early adulthood. That might also explain why you had too little mental energy left to tackle the obesity problem.

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TL;DR: Find a way to check yourself for ADHD. A diagnosis and correct medication might change your life.

If you don't have money for a therapist/evaluation, try at least to check out this book:

https://www.amazon.com/Taking-Charge-Adult-Russell-Barkley/dp/1606233386

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I'm sorry that your thoughts are all muddled up about this. It sounds like evangelical Christinaity has really done a number on you.

The best thing you can do is to take a breather, you won't be able to figure anything out while you're terrified, stressed, and overwhelmed. Leave it all alone for a while, put whatever faith you have on the backburner, go through the motions of whatever church life you have, and don't worry about the deep questions for a long while, until you feel stronger and you're in a better place in your life to dig into them.

You don't need to know everything, you don't need to figure it all out right now.

Focus right now on seeing a doctor about your depression, look into Cognitive-Behavioural Therapy (CBT). If you can't afford a therapist, there are websites or books you can read to help you work through CBT techniques yourself. Mind over Mood is a good book recommended by doctors for patients. Its not a replacement for a good doctor and appropriate medication, but it can help a lot alongside it.

Eventually, when you're in a better place, you can look a bit more carefully and clearly at why you're so terrified of hell, and why that is driving you into such a tailspin. You can figure out what you believe, and why you beleive it, without being torn apart and spun around by fear and depression. Because right now, you can't deal with it, and you shouldn't put that on yourself as another burden to carry.

this is a great idea! I've recently noticed just how much weed dehydrates me—even though it's DEFINITELY not as bad as alcohol, it's significant. In addition to ^this comment about boredom & dopamine, I'd like to recommend this book on binge eating to everyone: https://www.amazon.com/Overcoming-Binge-Eating-Second-Program/dp/1572305614

The American Psychological Association cites that text as the most current and evidence-based approach to treating binge eating via CBT. Which is just a fancy way of saying that any educated individual can read this book and gain valuable psychoeducation about how to deal with binge eating. If you're looking for additional support, look up some therapists in your state that provide treatment for individuals with eating disorders. You don't have to meet the criteria for something like anorexia or bulimia to benefit from some additional support!

I have both a dialectical and cognitive behavioral therapy book. Here are links to Amazon for them:

The Anxiety and Worry Workbook: The Cognitive Behavioral Solution https://www.amazon.com/dp/160623918X/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_TkInzbEA1SPKC

The Dialectical Behavior Therapy Skills Workbook: Practical DBT Exercises for Learning Mindfulness, Interpersonal Effectiveness, Emotion Regulation & ... Tolerance (New Harbinger Self-Help Workbook) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1572245131/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_-lInzbVZ0BS9H

I also recently saw a book called "Anxious in Love" that looked interesting.

https://www.amazon.ca/Mindful-Way-through-Depression-Unhappiness/dp/1593851286

Try reading some books maybe? A little mental escape from the situation. Get some thought provoking ideas and the practices in this book are scientifically proven to get results.

I feel that - confidence is huge when trying to make connections with people. You do what you gotta do to build that confidence, but also know that you don’t have to wait until you’ve hit your goal weight to start working on confidence! I personally found this workbook to be really helpful in combatting my own negative self-talk, if you’re at all the kind of person who enjoys workbooks. :)

Also, congratulations on the company you’re hopefully starting! This is amazing!! Way to go. I know we don’t know each other but I am proud of you and I am sending positive vibes to you and your company (and also to your one kidney). 😊

Was it this one by any chance? If not, I would not recommend buying it lol. I honestly didn't make it through the intro. It seems like so many of these books are intended for temporary things, not chronic conditions, but even with that, it sounds very judgmental. Hope you find something better!

I also have phobias, including medical phobias, and I've learned that exposure therapy is the most effective way to get over phobias - basically slowly introducing yourself to the thing you are afraid of so that your brain learns that there is no real threat present and your anxiety is lying to you. I would totally recommend finding a therapist that can practice exposure therapy with you. This workbook I have also highlights this approach and why it is helpful https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Worry-Workbook-Cognitive-Behavioral/dp/160623918X/ref=sr\_1\_3?dchild=1&amp;keywords=anxiety+workbook+cbt&amp;qid=1626315311&amp;sr=8-3

3 things. First, as some people mentioned, stimulating your mind is one way to feel like you're progressing, I'm personally into cooking and learning languages, you might want to give them a try.

Second, correct me if I'm wrong, but it sounds like you're feeling dumb because you're comparing yourself to other people. Remember that everyone is different and everyone has different interests, and since we measure success according to our own interests, we'll always be geniuses to some people and stupid to others. But your worth is inherent, it doesn't depend on what you do. Think about dogs for example. When we see a dog, we say "Aww what a cute dog" and we don't care about its colour or that it's missing a leg. We value the dog just for the companionship. It's the same with people. You're worthy simply because you exist.

Third, you don't have — or can, for that matter — to know about everything. You don't have to compete about who knows more. If you don't know about something, just ask. People like talking about what they enjoy and if you listen attentively and are interested you'll see people will like you even more than if you're an expert at that topic. You mentioned politics but it works the same way with almost everything.

P.S if you worry often The Anxiety and Worry Workbook (Amazon) is a good read on LibGen if you don't want or can't buy it

https://www.amazon.ca/Mindful-Way-through-Depression-Unhappiness/dp/1593851286

This is the number one for me. I have a few others that really helped me as well. But this is the one that put me on an entirely different path in life.

Jordan Peterson's "12 rules for life" is a good one as well, although he is a polarizing figure, and to me not the end all be all of philosophy. Just a lot of good takes.

I tend to lean more towards, buddhist/hindu thought. Ram Dass's "be here now" is a classic and a great introduction to thought that flipped my world upside down.

From there i have more recomendations, but just consuming any philosophical literature after these that youre personally interested in or think you will find helpful is a good idea. Always keep the ideas that resonate with you, put anyt other ideas on the back shelf. You may find them useful in time when youve progressed mentally. At the end of the day consuming as many ideas as you can is always helpful to gather perspective.

Podcasts/audio books are another medium you can pull ideas from. But physical books are easier to focus on in my experience when youre first learning an idea due to tactile sensation i believe.

This book helped me a lot

The Bipolar Disorder Survival Guide, Third Edition: What You and Your Family Need to Know https://www.amazon.com/dp/1462534988/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_VGAZTEFE9GNN2TFXJ3CA

I really recommend the book Mind Over Mood. It's essentially a therapy course in a book. I have anxiety and depression and I found it really useful.

https://www.amazon.com/Mind-Over-Mood-Second-Changing/dp/1462520421/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?dchild=1&amp;keywords=mind+over+mood&amp;qid=1619768656&amp;sr=8-1

You might already know this, but there is something called the 54321 method for when you have an anxiety attack or are just feeling anxiety. That might help.

If you can't find counseling that you like, or just want to work by yourself, you could try a Cognitive Behavioral Therapy workbook like The Anxiety and Worry Workbook: The Cognitive Behavioral SolutionThere are several like this; you could browse amazon and see if there's one that seems good to you.

Others have recommended therapists, but these are some other things you can try by yourself.

I hope you find what works for you. :)

>Oh really? I don’t really know where to start! If you have some resources I’d be super grateful but please don’t go out of your way! :)

This book was recommended to me on this subreddit I think and has a lot of great strategies.

Chronic pain sufferer with anxiety here, establishing the creds because otherwise this advice is going to seem really corny.

Buuuuuuut. Meditation, biofeedback (like meditation but they hook you up so you can visually see your body's reactions and watch to see what works as you try to relax - may be covered by insurance), massage, chiropractic, cognitive behavioral therapy (a type of counseling)...really go at it from the perspective of the anxiety. There are a lot more possible treatments for anxiety than TMJ, so targeting that is a good idea, glad you are.

If you're having trouble getting into counseling, there are some nice cognitive behavioral therapy workbooks you can go through yourself for anxiety. Here's an example but there are lots to choose from https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Worry-Workbook-Cognitive-Behavioral/dp/160623918X/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?dchild=1&amp;keywords=cbt+anxiety+workbook&amp;qid=1597525380&amp;refinements=p_72%3A2661618011&amp;rnid=1000&amp;s=books&amp;sprefix=cbt+anxiety&amp;s...

Is the oral surgeon a TMJ specialist? Do they agree with the type of guard you have?