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I recommend reading "The Millionaire Next Door", it goes it to more detail about the spending/saving/investing habits of the ~~average~~ most millionaires in America. Living in a culture that prioritizes spending it's not surprising those who do the best financially go against the grain, and are also frowned upon.
There's an excellent book about this called The Cuckoo's Egg. Highly recommend it, especially if you're getting started in the software development / cybersecurity space, or working alongside government agencies.
Instead of giving you advice, I have the perfect book recommendation that will come pretty close to directly answering your question. I read this years ago, but only just found it again and am giving it another read through.
The book is called 'So good they can't ignore you: why skills trump passion in the quest for work you love' by Cal Newport.
The author actually has a computer science degree funnily enough. In it he uses empirical evidence to argue that the common advice of 'follow your passion' is flawed and unrealistic, and generally bad advice. After arguing that he puts forward his arguments about what the best course of action is if you discount the passion hypothesis. Its full of examples of people he interviewed who took different approaches to end up doing what they love, why some failed at it and why some didn't. I really can't recommend this book more highly actually, I think it will be perfect for you.
Here is the amazon link https://www.amazon.com/Good-They-Cant-Ignore-You/dp/1455509124
Your dream life is 100% possible today. You can get remote gigs as a programmer making 6 figures working 5 hours a day if you have the aptitude for it. So if you're fine making $50k per year (which is more than enough for van life), you could work like 15-20 hours per week doing consulting work over a satellite internet connection from your van. And then take all the rest of that time and live your life. :) But you've got to work to get there because it requires lots of technical expertise in something.
These books have good generic advice for getting there if you're interested. They're by a professor who got into a tenured position while working normal hours (most people on tenure tracks work INSANE hours), so he knows what he's talking about.
https://www.amazon.com/Good-They-Cant-Ignore-You/dp/1455509124
https://www.amazon.com/Deep-Work-Focused-Success-Distracted/dp/1455586692/
>>The jets and all that other crap seem like a better value renting. > >Huh? $3 million in total wealth isn't much, especially for that. Please, don't do that. I strongly recommend that you read The Millionaire Next Door: The Surprising Secrets of America's Wealthy.
Yeah, that bit made me laugh. $3m isn't even remotely close to private jet territory. Try $300m. Lol
Most people that receive a large windfall like this do not fare well OP. At all. Be extremely careful with this money and do not tell anybody. Check out the "Windfall" section in the /r/personalfinance wiki. Also check out /r/fire and /r/fatFIRE.
Dude, hate to break it, but high school never ends.
Wait 'till you get in the workplace.
But MGTOW gives you power.
Also read 48 Laws of Power. Lots of good advice.
If you're interested in reading about this and other subtle strategies used to influence, I suggest you check out the book influence: the psychology of persuasion. It's one of my faves. It details:
- Reciprocity
- Anchoring
- Scarcity
- Decoy effect
- Similarity bias (fear of difference)
- Small commitment to influence longer term commitment
- Making efforts difficult to increase eventual satisfaction (Ikea effect)
All very interesting stuff that you can see in action every day.
That hard yank on the emotions drives urgency. Too hard a yank is 9 times out of 10 your clue of a financial scheme.
Recommended reading, "Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion"
Social proof in action. Long queues signal that if other people are willing to wait for the food, the stall's food must be good. It is a form of heuristic people use to make decisions about what is good or not. However, the long queue could be a result of slow cooking process, or the stall used to be good so but because the cook changed, the standard went down but people still queue based on the reputation of the stall. The book, "
"Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion" by Dr. Robert Cialdini discusses this and other interesting behavioural psychology themes.
Also if you queue for a long time, by the time you get your food, you are very hungry so anything tastes nice!
There are multiple meme professions that have no coherent purpose.
Hand-writing analysis, for example.
Body language bullshit primarily finds purchase in the world of high powered CEOs obsessed with charisima training.
https://www.amazon.com/Charisma-Myth-Science-Personal-Magnetism/dp/1591845947
Good self-help books are underappreciated. They can provide the push needed to us in critical moments of our lives, e.g. to overcome short-term pain / excessive risk-aversion when making an important decision, and let us change the fundamental frames / instill useful mantras into our lives, changing our trajectories significantly. These two self-help books definitely changed my life, providing both motivation and timeless advice:
How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big: Kind of the Story of My Life by Scott Adams
Can't Hurt Me: Master Your Mind and Defy the Odd by David Goggins
I recommend these to all my friends and everybody who read them so far loved them (note that for max effect probably best to space them out and to first read Adams and then Goggins a few months later).
>Donald Trump literally wrote the book on negotiating.
He had a ghost writer that did the work for him, and he had some rather unkind words about his former boss.
Lose the swift programming course, it’s not really relevant to you, and you already have a lot to cover in a tight space of time.
Good luck with your studies. As others have already said in this thread getting a researcher position will be super hard. There aren’t all that many positions available, and there’s so much hype around ML that they’re all super over-subscribed. You might be right that you don’t need a PhD, but a PhD and research experience are useful and you will be up against those that have them. You should consider getting some industry experience as a data scientist or data engineer (which might be a bit easier to get hired as) to complement your self study if you’ve decided academia is not for you.
You’ve got a lot of reading to do already, but I found the book So Good They Can’t Ignore You a helpful read when faced with a tough career choice. It’s not super long, and has some interesting ideas (mostly based on anecdotal evidence but useful nonetheless).
You're conflating "success" with "career". This is not what OP is talking about. They're merely suggesting that you have to try things; hobbies, jobs, etc, before you know what your passion is. Very often the thing you find that you're "good at" becomes your passion, rather than the other way around.
So Good They Can't Ignore You digs into this concept in greater detail.
I favor the craftsman mindset over the 4-hour workweek approach, so I (perhaps unsurprisingly) did not find much value in Ferris's work. I've read 4-hour-workweek, some of his blog posts, seem some TED talks, and flipped through 'Tribe of Mentors, all of which I found mediocre. The biggest advocate of the craftsman mindset that I know of is Cal Newport. I've read his blog (studyhacks) and his book (So good they can't ignore you). I think his work tends to be better researched and more substantive. I recommend both.
I suspect that the differences between the two has a lot to do with where they come from. In my view, Ferris is still the salesman he was when he started out. Many of his strategies are great for salepeople - 'firing' bad customers, offloading customer support tasks, etc. However, its worth thinking about what he is selling here - and I think the core idea in Ferris's work is that you can make an easy buck. I don't know that this idea is worth buying, nor that he offers anything more valuable than a few productivity tips. Newport is an academic, and so his work is oriented more as an attempt to answer a question: what choices result in happy and successful careers. He started out looking for general trends in career satisfaction and success, and his books are reports of what he's found. Of course, he is still selling something - but I think he is selling something more valuable: empirically driven insight into meaningful work (the key insight, by the way, is that you need to adopt the crafstman mindset).
> That's the sad thing, people say "it's the FBI leadership, not the rank and file!" this wasn't Comey and co. This was the rank and file.
A problem, though, is that the leadership generally sets the tone and emphasis of an organization. And since J. Edger Hoover, the primary focus has been political, especially on stuff that generates good publicity. That's why when I was growing up their emphasis and reputation was still based on bank robberies and kidnappings, which are both notorious and particularly easy to solve crimes, because of witnesses in the former, and the need to pick up a ransom in the latter.
If you're into computers, and, heh, this is another "Russia" thing, read The Cuckoo's Egg: Tracking a Spy Through the Maze of Computer Espionage. The one organization that wouldn't give Cliff Stoll the time of day in tracking down the West German hackers who were being run by the KFB was the FBI, because the crime didn't satisfy their $100,000 or more threshold.
Hoover did seriously care about counter-espionage, but it was always a red headed stepchild in the organization, and he of course was long gone by then. That the FBI started exerting itself so much about claimed Russian espionage and the like last year just by itself makes it very suspicious, they wouldn't do it without a political angle, which we now can be pretty sure was the "insurance policy" they had in case Trump got elected.
Io consiglio vivamente il libro che sto leggendo in questi giorni: Robert Cialdini - Influence - The Psychology Of Persuasion.
Spiega molti meccanismi con numerosi esempi, copre anche quello di cui la ragazza cui fa riferimento OP è rimasta vittima.
Athletes constitute a extreme minority, especially superstars like LeBron. While his example was a little extreme in how lucky the beginnings was, the story is by no means rare. The is a popular book called The Millionaire Next Door which goes to explain how most millionaires in the US got their wealth.
In the vast majority of cases, it's quite straightforward: spend less than you earn, and maximize tax-advantaged investing. Don't waste money on expensive cars or other forms of wasteful spending. Keep doing that for a couple of decades, and you'll be a millionaire.
Of course, the above path does come with assumptions. First is that you need to have an employable degree, and not be crippled by student debt in a way that makes you lose a big chunk of your early earnings. Second is that you need to be not unlucky and e.g. not have an expensive medical emergency. Having a spouse definitely helps (but is not required), and not having kids also helps (but they won't make anything impossible).
Bottom line is that the most millionaires in the US are not sportsmen, nor are they born to immense privilege.
Cliff Stoll doesn't recommend metal openers for his Klein Bottles.
Fun fact: Cliff wrote one of the first investigative books on overseas espionage/hacking in the 1980s "The Cuckoo's Egg" and has a lot of other neat topological glassware on the site.
Maybe there's an online copy, but if that seems insightful, you may enjoy this groundbreaking book:
https://www.amazon.com/Influence-Psychology-Persuasion-Robert-Cialdini/dp/006124189X
I learned many of those mental tricks through sales experience.
https://www.amazon.com/48-Laws-Power-Robert-Greene/dp/0140280197
That's a Reader's Digest version where most people start and end. It's widely disseminated and talked about. I've never met a single person in my life who was interested in such things though who didn't have some underlying selfish drive for it. Not excluding myself from that at all. If you start practicing these things, it will accentuate and draw out those traits more and more. You should always keep in mind what is truly most important in life.
The DCA or lump sum argument, IMO, is a pointless argument. You're trading one risk for another. DCA invites the risk of missing out on a rising bull market, lump sum invites the risk of investing everything right before a downturn. Since we cannot time the market, and any successful timing is just luck, I always opt for lump sum. Markets are constantly at an all-time high, that's what happens when markets are historically on the rise more than they're on the downturn. DCA won't really hurt you though. It's more important that you focus on saving as much as you can.
IMO the debate between VT and WTI/VXUS is also pretty negligible. At your age, it's far more important to focus on investing in the first place, meaning staying frugal and saving money to invest. Either the VT or VTI/VXUS combo will outperform the vast majority of people in the long run, as long as you can save money and invest in the first place.
The average 25 year-old isn't concerned whatsoever with investing or retirement. As long as you make a concentrated effort to invest 20-30% of every paycheck, you'll be very wealthy in the future, regardless of what strategy you take in regards to choosing between lump sum/DCA or between VT and VTI/VXUS.
At your age, I'd highly recommend this book. Saving 20-30% of any money that comes your way may seem daunting, but it's actually not all that challenging.
Please find a good therapist to work on these issues. If money is an issue, look for "pro bono" or "sliding scale" or just ask if they have a sliding scale. You can also find some online only therapists as well.
In the meantime, you can read an old version of "How to win friends an influence people" How to Win Friends and Influence People images.kw.com/docs/2/1/2/212345/1285134779158_htwfaip.pdf or you can find the new version that addresses social media on Amazon.
or this https://www.amazon.com/Charisma-Myth-Science-Personal-Magnetism/dp/1591845947
there are tons and tons of books to help you with relationships and talking to people. it just takes practice. you can do this.
You will never win an argument by presenting your facts and proving that your adversary is wrong. They will never admit that no matter how clear your argument is (unless you are arguing with someone whose job it is to be open minded e.g. scientists)
You will get much further by influence and persuasion. Influence by Robert Cialdini worked very well for me in this regards.
It all comes down to nice behaviour because it's a great way of exploiting the social principle of [reciprocity](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Reciprocity_(social_psychology\)).
If someone's being nice to you, giving you compliments, flirting with you, giving you free stuff, they want something. Maybe not right away, but it creates an expectation that the "niceness" should be returned.
An example of this is people seeking donations. They'll give free gifts to make you feel obligated to give something back.
Check out the book Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion by Robert B. Cialdini. He goes into various ways that our behaviours can be influenced, and talks a bit about how to handle being manipulated.
Part of growing up is realizing this is simply how the world works. Most things are transactional. There's always an exchange, a give and take involved on some level.
Key point to note is that it doesn't work for sex. You can't negotiate attraction. My personal opinion is that this is why people that are successful in business, typically, aren't successful with women, and vice versa, because they require opposing strategies.
It's not us.
"Gossip" can bind groups, and it can tear them asunder. The hedgies have clearly hired top tier social engineering talent. It's a $10 word for troll and others.
I would suggest reading the seminal "Influence" by author Cialdini. It's a fascinating, highly readable pre-woke, ie, real science, examination of social human behaviors.
>https://www.amazon.com/Influence-Psychology-Persuasion-Robert-Cialdini/dp/006124189X
Paso 1:
aprendé inglés. Bien.
No la típica "uhuh inglés medio, entiendo lo que leo, igual está google translate", sino poder expresarte 100% y poder entender al detalle cualquier serie en Netflix sin subtítulos.
Sin esto no tenés acceso al 90% de la información que vas a necesitar para cualquier ámbito de la vida.
Paso 2:
leete este libro: https://www.amazon.com/-/es/Cal-Newport/dp/1455509124
As noted, do SFAS selection preparation and you'll be ok physically. Read Influence and Verbal Judo.
Also, DM me if you have other questions.
Check out 'The Charisma Myth' by Olivia Fox Cabane. It showed me that charisma is a trainable skill rather than something innate. You can buy a physical copy on Amazon or download it here from bookzz. The bookzz version is only available in epub format.
Influence: The Psychology of Persuasion - Robert Cialdini amazon