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Funnily enough, the side of the brain we use to see things in our head is also the shittiest at drawing.
If you're interested in improving your skill I can't recommend Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain enough.
Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain: The Definitive, 4th Edition https://www.amazon.com/dp/1585429201/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_605eDbH573H1C
Edit: I know the left vs right brain thing is fake, what I meant is being able to visualize something in your head doesn't correlate to drawing skills until you train your brain to do it
I personally think the opposite. Photo realism is not "advanced". Painting impressionistically is not beginner either. What you need for impressionist painting comes off the back of photorealism. Copying a photo does not make you advanced. Infusing a photo with emotion and meaning makes you advanced. This painting is just that. And I love it. I am honestly tired seeing a photorealistic drawing and then clicking the comments just to see "Wow! I thought it was a photo" over and over again. Not to knock it, but this sort of work takes a different kind of skill. You need a handle (hah) on your brushwork and how you react to what you see. Difficult as fuck. Im still learning how to do this myself.
Learning "how to see" is definitely the cornerstone in becoming a better artist, though. That I agree with. Don't equate impressionism with not being able to do this. In my opinion they do it the best. I recommend anyone learning to pick up "drawing on the right side of the brain". Thats what personally helped me with getting things right. I used to draw photorealistic but I felt that it was an empty sort of exercise. Where do you go from there? Here. You go here. You express yourself.
Love the painting
Because you're not using that organ to its fullest extent. Drawing On the Right Side of the Brain, by Betty Edwards can drastically improve your artwork in an amazingly short time. You can find copies of this book for free online, and it's well worth it. It teaches you how to draw what you see, rather than what your left brain tells you an object should look like. There are exercises that teach you to not draw an object, but rather the space around the object, freeing you to not draw a caricature of the object.
Introvert/ extrovert aren’t exact opposites. Most people exhibit tendencies of both. Here’s a good book about it: Quiet
It does, but you don't need to know all of that to draw from a still photo of a face. Instead of drawing a skull, muscles, skin, you break the picture down into shapes and lines and draw those instead. You don't need to know any of the anatomy because all the visual information you need to draw it is already there without any knowledge of how it works.
It's possible to go from not knowing how to draw to being able to draw a pretty good face in just a week if you can learn to do this, there are several books that teach it. This is the one most people will recommend you. From there you just practice getting more accurate and learn how to actually do it (physical techniques to shade, how to blend, etc.).
He's being a dick about it but what /u/curdledS8 is saying is 100% accurate -- knowing how to draw from a still photo really well doesn't mean shit if you don't know how to draw form, how perspective works, etc.. It's not that impressive if you think about it this way.
"she's not going to change," always my favorite JustNo excuse. Must be nice to control the world and everyone in it so we all have to work around the MILs personality. ��
As a practical matter if she's not boundary stomping you to death, I'd keep trying to coexist. Though you might want to remind your DH that he married you when you have the quiet, reserved personality you have now - it's not like you sprung it on him after the fact. Did his attraction to you include the fact that you have a more restful personality than his family? And if so, why would he want you to change it?
ETA: Also, this book is excellent and very informative about introverts, I highly recommend it!
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking https://www.amazon.com/dp/B004J4WNL2/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_9LI2CbQ1WKHWF
The problem is in India introverts are shamed by teachers, by parents, by society. There is Nothing wrong with being an introvert
In fact read this book - https://www.amazon.in/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153
I am also an introvert, have always been one. And I love it.
I don’t equate extroversion with confidence.
Quiet by Susan Cain explains our culture’s overvaluing of extroversion.
I’m introverted and FIERCE.
I urge anyone to read Oliver Sacks' "Musicophilia" which goes into this topic of people visualizing music.
Heck, read ANY book by the late Dr. Sacks. Dude did a wonderful job exploring the mysteries of the mind and writing down all the weird shit that can come from it.
I've heard it called tacit knowledge before, as /u/Luckater already mentioned. I've also seen it referenced, assuming you're somewhat good at the game (and getting "in the zone") as a flow state.
The Artist's Way by Julia Cameron
It's putting me on a path that may not align with the RE of FIRE, but is slowly stepping me towards things I enjoy. Do I really enjoy being a hardware engineer in industry? No. Can I use the tenets of FIRE to manage my money to allow for a more flexible and enriching life? Yes! And I'm mid-plan on executing that change which was crafted d during the 12 weeks of working through this book.
EDIT: I also did the Marie Kondo tidying during this stage so that helped too!
The best resource I have found for learning how to draw/ progress in your skills is the book "drawing on the right side of the brain" here is an amazon link to the BOOK
But it's very easy to find this book online for free as well.
Other resources were weren't actually drawing books, but more of anatomy books. They are really helpful to teach you proportions, and shows you how the body is built up from bones to muscles, to skin etc...
I would avoid those "how to draw ___" books. They only teach you how to draw that one specific thing and its hard to transition that into drawing your own thing. The book I linked above does a good job of teaching you how to "see" what your drawing. So when you are drawing an eye, or an ear, it teaches you how to break down the subject into shapes and lines. A couple angled lines and squiggles are a lot easier to understand and draw than a full image of an eye/ ear.
If you read Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World that Can't Stop Talking it discusses just this. I actually find things have gotten worse since the book's release as social media seems to have crept even more into our everyday lives. Every time I see someone doing a dance in public for Tik Tok or setting up an elaborate (fake) photoshoot for Instagram, I wonder what planet I've been transported to. I don't feel comfortable here.
I read somewhere that the reason that most adults draw like eleven-year-olds is that we are very self-critical during that age, and just stop drawing. Which means no practice and therefore no skill improvement.
If you really want to learn, there's a book which claims that anyone can learn to draw at least decently using their method.
(Sorry for imposing if you're not actually interested in drawing, I just thought I should mention it)
You're short, you have acne, you dress poorly, you're no fun to be around, you have no friends/squad, you're shy/introverted/won't approach, you look like a boy and have no authority, you have no sexual experience ... why do you think you should have a girlfriend again?
I know I'm being harsh, but the earlier you learn this the better: you must offer value. Otherwise why do you think anyone would be with you?
Work on the things you can, accept the things you can't.
Short - no solution.
Acne - eat better, sleep better, see a dermatologist.
Learn to dress better.
Finally, learn to socialize. This will have all kind of cascading effects. You will be more fun to be around, you will have a squad, you will have authority based on your friends' opinions of you. It definitely won't be easy, and sure, it goes against what you think is your fundamental nature, but right now, your fundamental nature is also to be girlfriendless. How badly do you want to change the situation?
Some tips for being more sociable: Be generous with your time and thoughts. Compliment people. Listen to them. Think about what they need and offer to help them. Again, you must offer value. Sometimes you won't get anything back. That's part of the pain of the learning process. Let that unrequited kindness go.
Here's a book that may help you with your introverted nature. In part, the author recommends faking it until you make it. Make it into a game, so you can step away, and you can reward yourself for small bit of progress:
https://www.amazon.ca/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153
It’s so bizarre. We (introverts) are just over here chillin’, letting people do their thing, and frequently it seems like extroverts are like, “WHATS WRONG WITH YOU?!”
But, the world is built for extroverts, so it’s kinda understandable. Reading the book, “Quiet” really made me feel comfortable and proud about being an introvert, and I recommend it!
(ETA link: https://www.amazon.com/dp/0307352153/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_imm_ZKTPB7VPHVJX5SC9E69P)
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking by Susain Cain. Highly recommended. Changed the way I felt about my self in a very positive way.
And that stupid sarcastic joke: "So-and-so is being so loud over here! Haha!" I hate it.
Our society just values extrovert personality traits more than introvert traits. Check out this book if your curious about it
Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking/dp/0307352153
It's a lot more about skill than it is about talent. Practice practice practice.
The old book Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain has extremely useful exercises that will help you learn to do the most important thing when learning to draw : draw what you see, not what you think you see.
For example, if you look closely at an eye there aren't many sharp lines, it's bumpy and folded and there's crazy texture to the irises. But when you draw what you think instead of what you see you get a very hieroglyphic looking almond shape with a colored circle inside it, and a black dot in the middle of that.
Anyway, that book can teach even beginners how to break away from that and net huge progress. But you have to practice, that's the part where it all falls down for most people.
You can do it. You can absolutely do it!
Also check out this book: Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking https://www.amazon.com/dp/0307352153/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_ApQACbCDH85KV
It's a good read for understanding ourselves and hopefully help your Mom too.
I do that all the time - I think this is pretty common for people who are introverted. Extroverts tend to get their energy from others, while introverts get their energy from within, while people suck the energy out of them. Going to a quiet place helps you to reenergize.
If interested there is a good book called “Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking”. It definitely made me feel more normal.
Check this book out. You will be able to draw really well before you are half way through the book.
I try to remember that extroverts don't know how to handle us any more than we know how to handle them.
Then, you can be snarky and tell them "better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak and remove all doubt", but that's not likely to endear you to anyone that doesn't already know you well.
Alternatively, you can keep a copy of Susan Cain's excellent book in your desk, maybe even on your desk, and offer to let anyone making these comments borrow it.
This may be a bit hippie-dippie for your taste but the book The Artist’s Way really helped me come back to myself and clarify my values and find ways to express myself in and out of work. Again: it’s pretty woo-woo. But I liked it and it helped!
I think you would enjoy Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. It is a great book for people with quieter, more introverted personalities trying to navigate the corporate world.
Beyond that, I can sympathise. It is tough out there and many people do burn out for the reasons you enumerated. Definitely wishing you the best of luck with these feelings. I don't have personal advice to share, as I opted to work for myself instead to avoid feeling so stuck in the rat race. However, I really did enjoy Susan Cain's book, so I would recommend taking a look at it if you want more insight and advice.
This is absolutely beautiful. I think what's most important is this: "this inner critic is your adversary, [but] it is also fundamental to the creative process".
In other words, don't try to avoid the struggle; face it, embrace it, because this is what creation is all about.
On that exact subject, I recommend "The War of Art" by Steven Pressfield. It's quite short but very intense, worth a read.
My family was what I needed to get away from lmao. No I had to figure stuff out on my own. Well, not completely, i listened dozens of self help audiobooks. From Anthony Robbins to Zig Ziglar (zig ziglar is awesome lol) Neurolinguistic programming techniques worked, but that's brainwashing. It'll come back to haunt you twice as hard once you can't trick yourself.
Also the book the artists way tought me a different way to view emotions. Not just pushing them away. https://www.amazon.com/Artists-Way-25th-Anniversary/dp/0143129252
There's one technique I still use and that's physically moving the memories far away in my mind. Make it smaller. It's quick to do when it pops up unwanted.
Headspace techniques do basically the opposite, they teach you neither to change or focus on the memory. Just let it be there among the other memories and thoughts. Here's the link: https://www.netflix.com/title/81280926
They have fun animations if anything.
As for nightmares, I always lucid dream. But with nightmares that's like playing chess against yourself. You can always come up with a way things go wrong. And then again and again and again. So I do have experience with that too lol. Controlling the thoughts before you go to bed is kinda essential imo to make nightmares go away. If you don't deal with thoughts during the day, they'll come to you at night. So I think the only way to deal effectively with nightmares is during the day.
Edit: in the end, for people like us, we have to choose whether we remain a victim or refuse to let the abuser have any more control over us. Realising that helped me a lot.
> I'm not the most talkative and i am kinda introverted but I don't want to work with someone that only grunts and smashes their keyboard as forms of communication
Years ago, I picked up this book - <strong>Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking</strong> -- and it articulates a lot of misconceptions that people throw at introverts, and even misconceptions some self-proclaimed introverts will make of themselves.
Introvert typically refers to someone that recharges alone. You can enjoy being around people, but still want to be alone to recharge.
Antisocial on the other hand are people who avoid talking to others.
You can be a social introvert, an antisocial introvert, social extrovert, or even an antisocial extrovert (yes, this really exists) among a variety of other combinations.
I get the feeling the user you responded to might be conflating concepts into one lump -- maybe they mean differently, but the way they're currently coming across isn't the case, hence all the replies from multiple users thus far basically proclaiming, "uh what".
Hell, 2 out of the 3 active mods here are introverts, case in point.
In the past, I even called myself an extrovert, when in fact, I'm actually a social introvert. I like socializing but damn, do I need to hibernate and recharge alone while true extroverts just go find more people to recharge from... But I digress.
I recommend this book/audiobook - “Quiet: the power of introverts in a world that can’t stop talking” by Susan Cain. She was a lawyer herself and very much an introvert. Might be helpful to you, perhaps consider checking it out!
https://www.amazon.com/Quiet-Power-Introverts-World-Talking-ebook/dp/B004J4WNL2
I'd like to nominate Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience by Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi. I think it'd be a good fit for this subreddit.
Here's the blurb on Amazon:
>Psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi's famous investigations of "optimal experience" have revealed that what makes an experience genuinely satisfying is a state of consciousness called flow. During flow, people typically experience deep enjoyment, creativity, and a total involvement with life. In this new edition of his groundbreaking classic work, Csikszentmihalyi demonstrates the ways this positive state can be controlled, not just left to chance. Flow: The Psychology of Optimal Experience teaches how, by ordering the information that enters our consciousness, we can discover true happiness and greatly improve the quality of our lives.