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It’s not for children. It’s a tongue in cheek book like the book “Go the Fuck to Sleep” It is real bible stories though. Here’s the amazon link from Canada; it’s got a decent-sized description. https://www.amazon.ca/Awkward-Moments-Found-Average-Childrens/dp/149217744X/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?adgrpid=61491124739&gclid=EAIaIQobChMIgIyb2amB5AIVj_5kCh2I6QTsEAAYASAAEgK2r_D_BwE&hvadid=310045490054&hvdev=m&hvlocphy=9001437&hvnetw=g&...
Cool. Bit of advice though: in about a week or two you're probably going to come down off the emotional high and start to question it and then be tempted to conclude you were just being emotional.
Don't give it in to it. Pick up some religious books with substance in them. Just offhand, since it's sitting nearby, I would suggest The Screwtape Letters.
Pooh is intentionally simple minded and comparing trump's garbage to that beautiful simple bear is just not fair!
Side note, check out "the Tao of pooh" as it shows why pooh is so wonderfully simple. The Tao of Pooh https://www.amazon.com/dp/0140067477/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_6UbeCbQ3ZHQEQ
I haven’t bought it yet, but plan to tonight, looks like it will go nice with my other bible-esque books my family isn’t happy about.
If people are interested in how severe a lot of these laws are, The Year Of Living Biblically by AJ Jacobs is really interesting, very approachable, and fairly humorous.
It sounds like you want to learn more about the great, the wise, the merciful, FSM!
The FSM watches over us with is meaty eyes and every so often, when we are hungry, he touches us with his noodly tentacles.
I'd like to offer you a book that explains more about the FSM. Unfortunately this book isn't free, but you can order it from Amazon.
https://www.amazon.com/Gospel-Flying-Spaghetti-Monster/dp/0812976568
Read this instead: https://www.amazon.com/God-Disappointed-You-Mark-Russell/dp/1603090983/ref=nodl_
It’s the cliff notes version of the Bible told in the modern vernacular and each book is a few pages long. It is SURPRISINGLY accurate to the historical and academic understandings of the text.
For example, the Book of Revelations is presented as what it really is: a tome of “fuck you, Rome!” writings written in code as to not get in trouble… not some grand prophecy of the 2nd coming of Christ.
Aside:
If people don't want to, or find the Bible hard to read - a good alternative is "God is Disappointed In You". It's a humourous abridged but somewhat accurate version of the Bible. Amazon link.
I own it and love it. Whilst I did read the Bible mostly cover to cover a few years ago (skipped the genealogy), this comedy version is a great refresher.
King James. And no, it is terrible. It is definitely not meant to be read cover to cover. Books like Kings and Numbers are pointless slogs.
Edit: if you are intent on doing it I’d advise you to pick a modern easier to read version. Unless you were the type of person who loved reading Shakespeare in high school.
I’d recommend this version. https://www.amazon.com/God-Disappointed-You-Mark-Russell/dp/1603090983
I have several CS Lewis books in my library. One of my favorites is The Screwtape Letters. I also read the Narnia books to my kids.
I find this book extremely funny to reference when people try to defend the Bible.
[Awkward Moments](Awkward Moments (Not Found in... https://www.amazon.com/dp/149217744X?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share). It is funny and informative.
Have you read The Year of Living Biblically by AJ Jacobs? https://www.amazon.com/Year-Living-Biblically-Literally-Possible/dp/0743291484
He does just that including trying to follow the obscure rules.
Before you do anything I suggest you first read a short but poignant book called Screwtape Letters by CS Lewis.
It's satire about how demons tempt Christians away from the faith.
And they call The Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster a joke. At least we have a Gospel.
It took some time for me to come to terms with it. In the end, I had to accept that ambiguity is ok. I was Mormon. That's a fact. I had good experiences. A lot of those experiences revolved around the church in one way or another. That's another fact. I don't have the option to have memories that are purely sweet in retrospect, butI do have the opportunity to accept and appreciate the sour with the sweet.
Have you ever heard of the painting The Vinegar Tasters?
In it, Confucius, Buddha, and Laozi (the writer of the Tao te Ching) are tasting vinegar from the vat. Confucius and Buddha find it too bitter or sour, and make bitter and sour faces. Laozi tastes it and a look of joy is on his face. He is the only one between them who can taste it, accept that it is sour, and appreciate it because it is sour.
One of the most important books I've read is the Tao of Pooh. Funny enough, I was assigned it in an Asian Humanities class. It didn't turn me into a Daoist, but it did explain a philosophy that accepts ambiguity and suggests a way to accept and appreciate my past. It's $6 and 158 pages. Maybe you will appreciate it, too.
I haven't read it yet but a friend recommended this book to me.
https://www.amazon.com/Year-Living-Biblically-Literally-Possible/dp/0743291484
It sounds like that book should answer your question exactly.
You may be interested in a more in-depth look at this hypocrisy:
https://www.amazon.com/Year-Living-Biblically-Literally-Possible/dp/0743291484
i recommend this short booklet for some highlights. (there are two books in this series)
Awkward Moments (Not Found in Your Average) Children's Bible: 1 https://www.amazon.com/dp/149217744X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_TTVTYT89NQ6EVKVK66KA?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
Perhaps you should reread the last paragraph of your own orignal post. Entomology is fascinating, but at the end of the day, it's not that complicated. The word Allah predates Islam, so that's a big clue in itself. It's the same God.
You can use whatever translation you want for the teachings of the Christ, the message stays the same and all goes back to the influence of Saul/Paul and then St. Jerome. Worse, it all goes back to the editorial influences of Constantine and King James.
Of course the religions are different. That's why we've had the unending holy wars. It's still the same God, same holy book (and those ten commandments , just ask Charlie Hebdo) of the Hebrew Bible, with the Christian Bible and the Quran tacked on for interesting flavor and everyone fighting over who is right.
We're three siblings fighting over who loves Daddy most, best and what he REALLY meant. Only humans are capable of something so mind numbingly stupid.
I love Reza Aslan as a speaker and writer on the subjects, he's incredibly interesting. You should give him a look. For lighter reading that's insightful and thought provoking, but will still make you laugh, I recommend this.
LOLcats and LOLspeak. It was a whole phenomenon.
They literally translated the BIBLE into LOLspeak.
https://www.amazon.ca/LOLcat-Bible-beginnin-Ceiling-stuffs/dp/1569757348
Think of the man hours that went into that thing!
and why are you so offended by my religion? I've every right to quote my holybook.
The book that changed my entire perspective on this issue was The Year of Living Biblically, in which the author defines every rule or law in the Bible and attempts to live by them.
He makes many interesting observations on the futility of living your life by everything the Bible says. He also points out how hypocritical it is for religions to call out the breaking of certain rules/laws as sins when they are only mentioned just a few times, while others are mentioned dozens or hundreds of times and nobody cares when they are broken.
This is from a satire children’s bible series.
Awkward Moments (Not Found in Your Average) Children’s Bible
They’re great. I have all three volumes.
It is by jewish law. Maybe it is not your jewish law and not mine, but it is their jewish law. This "you don't need tahara since there is no temple for 2000 years" is some reform stuff. Which is ok by me, but not by all. (Sorry most sources I know are not in english.)
Also there are many laws besides taking mikva for women and their husbands for nidda. e.g. not eating after the wife, not passing objects directly etc.
Catch the Jew from Tuvia Tenenbom he was born to ultra orthodox Jewish family but run away. In this book he returns to Israel pretending to be German journalist. I am just reading this book and it’s amazing. I have Jewish ancestors so I am on the Israel site but I think this book fairly reports about both sites. I think it’s really worth reading
She’ll be fine. Why do you think they shun people who don’t believe as they do and tell kids not to associate with other kids who don’t hold their views? Critical thinking is contagious, lol! She’s going to catch it from you unless she has some emotional reason not to, like if the critical thinkers in her life also are associated with something strongly negative (like the lesbian’s daughter who was abused by her partner).
I live in the American south and admit it was a bit unnerving when my kids started attending church events regularly with their friends sometimes. But I supported their open exploration.
That said, I could not wait for my kids to be old enough to look at this with me. Some of these stories are pretty racy but it’s laugh out loud funny in places. It’s all actual Bible scriptures and not misinterpreted. We looked them up as we went! It was truly one of the joys of parenting for me.
https://www.amazon.com/Awkward-Moments-Childrens-Bible-Vol/dp/149217744X
From the official summary:
https://www.amazon.com/Catch-Jew-Tuvia-Tenenbom/dp/9652297984
> Catch the Jew! recounts the adventures of gonzo journalist Tuvia Tenenbom...
I think it is much closer to gonzo journalism than immersion journalism, and the publisher seems to agree
> ...at times risking his life as he assumes the identities of Tobi the German and even Abu Ali in order to probe into the many stories in this strange land and poke holes in all of them...
So his objective is not just to figure out their motivations and attitudes, but rather to poke holes in them.
> ...By turns poignant, enraging, and laugh-out-loud funny...
So it does indeed seek to entertain just as much as inform
NTA, religious people are nuts, you should get her this for Christmas next year tell her you found religion and you’ll be saved by his noodles appendage ! https://www.amazon.com/Gospel-Flying-Spaghetti-Monster/dp/0812976568