Apparently, The End Games.
The following is not an affiliate link. I haven't read the book. I know almost nothing about it.
But here's the Amazon link.
> My favourite was about this brother and sister who ran away to live in a museum. I can't remember what it was called, but I loved it so much, the idea of just being away somewhere else.
From the Mixed-Up Files of Mrs. Basil E. Frankweiler.
I loved that one too! 😹
Sounds like Patrick Ness's The Rest of Us Just Live Here.
Congratulations - your gender identity aligns with your AGAB. That's why you've never had to give any extensive though to your identity, why it doesn't bother you to be mislabeled, etc.
For a lot of, if not most, trans people, they know their gender identity and they know that their AGAB does not align with their identity. An AMAB trans person knows that being called a boy is wrong, because that isn't what they are. They know that being referred to with male pronouns is inaccurate for them.
If you are truly interested in learning more and want an accessible introduction, I'd recommend this book: https://www.amazon.com/Luna-Julie-Anne-Peters/dp/0316011274
It's YA, but for a very shallow introduction to the topic, it does a good job of explaining how intrinsic gender identity is.
Have you even read the book? Read any reviews on it. It was about gangs. Here’s the Amazon book review; https://www.amazon.com/Outsiders-S-Hinton/dp/014240733X/ref=nodl_ . Here’s the rotten tomatoes review; https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/outsiders . It is about gangs. Anyone who has read it would know that. Yeah, they were from different backgrounds, so? It is a book about gangs and gang violence.
In case anyone is curious, this is from The End Games by T Michael Martin.
https://www.amazon.com/End-Games-T-Michael-Martin/dp/0062201816
You can get it used for like a penny, if you're intrigued.
Reading this query, it seems more like Arie's getting some well-deserved payback and Wesley is still the butt of every joke. This is a huge problem because it reads like Arie's meant to be the main character and there is absolutely nothing to like about her - not even a clever voice.
Then in the last paragraph, you say there are 3 points of view, suggesting that Arie, Kieran, and Wesley should have equal page time.
Overall suggestion: rewrite your query with at least 1 short paragraph (1-3 sentences) from each character's POV, then pull it together with your last paragraph, which works well.
Also, with the multiple POV, long time span, and finally piecing together the breakup, I would strongly suggest you read I'll Give You the Sun by Jandy Nelson. Not a particularly similar plot, but a very similar mechanic.