I try really hard too. It's a struggle to stay on track with structure. When I was diagnosed with BP2, I told a friend I knew had BP1 and he told me to do a few simple things: No drugs or alcohol, 8 hours of sleep a night, limit if not avoid caffeine, and read this book
Of course I try to do these things but it's difficult and currently it's really not working. It takes a lot of effort and sometimes we slip up and then start forgetting to stop and take care of ourselves. My ideal plan is to: sleep 8 hours, only 1 cup of coffee/tea a day if I decide I'd like one, remember to eat substantial healthy food everyday, at least one hour of quiet time before bed to pray/meditate/whatever spiritual or comforting activity fits, consult r/bipolar for understanding and encouragement, take meds at same time each day, try to stick to structure, always remember that my life is not just my own - it is dedicated to helping others and helping my family. exercise. Currently, I'm trying to get back on track after the semester has just ended and I've met a new schedule shift.
It's hard. But I believe our suffering is something to be learned from. I try to accept what comes my way and most days I believe the hand I've been dealt is for some sort of strange unknown reason. You're alright, not alone. We just get stuck.
Here's my favorite Kay Jamison book:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B000SEH7ZO/ref=dbs_a_def_rwt_bibl_vppi_i0
Truck Full of Money:
https://www.amazon.com/Truck-Full-Money-Tracy-Kidder-ebook/dp/B019B6WTVQ
An Unquiet Mind and Catching Fire are the next two on my to read list.