What is Reddit's opinion of Good News About Sex & Marriage (Revised Edition): Answers to Your Honest Questions about Catholic Teaching?

From 3.5 billion Reddit comments

Yep you're right, my bad. I thought I remembered him talking about it in Theology of the Body. Christopher West talks about it, although again I don't think he directly discusses oral sex.

"Since the female orgasm, however, isn’t necessarily linked to the possibility of conception, so long as it takes place within the overall context of an act of intercourse, it need not, morally speaking, be during actual penetration… Ideally, the wife’s orgasm would happen simultaneously with her husband’s [orgasm], but this is easier said than done for many couples. In fact, if the wife’s orgasm isn’t achieved during the natural course of foreplay and consummation, it would be the loving thing for the husband to stimulate his wife to climax thereafter (if she so desired)." https://www.amazon.ca/Good-News-About-Marriage-Revised/dp/0867166193

> I know there's groups who protest abortion providers and there's Catholic-run crisis pregnancy centers. Are there any groups in-between who look to educate and otherwise break the cycles that lead to abortion?

More than anything, I'd actually say that's the Catholic church itself. By wanting to put an end to abortion, we're also looking to break the cycles which lead to divorce, single-parent households, abusive relationships, marginalized mothers, extreme poverty, and the throwaway mentality which inevitably casts some children (in the womb or otherwise) as undesirable mishaps without human worth.

Politically there are things that can be done to partially address those issues, and they should be done. But ultimately this all has to do with society's conception of the family, of what loving relationships are, of what the role of sex can be in them, and what the bond of marriage is. That's what the Catholic church is trying address on this topic, and furthermore, to draw the connection between a lived experience of family and a lived experience of faith.

I'd recommend checking out Christopher West's book The Good News about Sex & Marriage if you'd want to know more about the church's pedagogical approach in this.

A great resource for your question is the book The Good News about Sex & Marriage by Christopher West. In general, the current orthodox mininalist opinion is that as long as the man has his climax end where it is supposed to end, then there is freedom regarding the details of how they get there and the stimulation they engage in. For example, heavy tactile or oral foreplay would be allowed as long as the sexual act ends in its proper place when it comes to the man (this would however exclude pure mutual masturbation if it precludes the procreative dimension of the act). As for the woman specifically, the consensus (even among stricter theologians) is that if a man climaxes before she does, he would still be able to help her get there through manual stimulation, as outlined above.

An important side note regarding oral pleasure specifically, is that the moral theology of the Church hasn't historically sided with the current 'minimalist' opinion, given the risk that the man eyaculates outside of the proper place (rendering the act non-procreative), or that a couple ends up having developing more affection to unnatural means of stimulation (ie.oral) than the natural ones inherent to the act, thus rendering it a venial sin (full explanation here). Given that the Church hasn't made a definite ruling on this (and that the minimalist opinion that does allow for it is not altogether improbable), an informed Catholic should weight the intrinsic and extrinsic reasons for each position and chose the one that he sees as more probable. [For example, St. Alphonsus Liguori ruled that having conyugal relations with the woman on top instead of the man was a venial sin--an opinion I find quite dubious--so as someone who is well read on moral theology, I wouldn't be following this opinion, because I don't think it is the closest one to the truth].

Godbless!

A great resource for your question is the book The Good News about Sex & Marriage by Christopher West. In general, the current orthodox mininalist opinion is that as long as the man has his climax end where it is supposed to end, then there is freedom regarding the details of how they get there and the stimulation they engage in. For example, heavy tactile or oral foreplay would be allowed as long as the sexual act ends in its proper place when it comes to the man (this would however exclude pure mutual masturbation if it precludes the procreative dimension of the act). As for the woman specifically, the consensus (even among stricter theologians) is that if a man climaxes before she does, he would still be able to help her get there through manual stimulation, as outlined above.

An important side note regarding oral pleasure specifically, is that the moral theology of the Church hasn't historically sided with the current 'minimalist' opinion, given the risk that the man eyaculates outside of the proper place (rendering the act non-procreative), or that a couple ends up having developing more affection to unnatural means of stimulation (ie.oral) than the natural ones inherent to the act, thus rendering it a venial sin (full explanation here). Given that the Church hasn't made a definite ruling on this (and that the minimalist opinion that does allow for it is not altogether improbable), an informed Catholic should weight the intrinsic and extrinsic reasons for each position and chose the one that he sees as more probable. [For example, St. Alphonsus Liguori ruled that having conyugal relations with the woman on top instead of the man was a venial sin--an opinion I find quite dubious--so as someone who is well read on moral theology, I wouldn't be following this opinion, because I don't think it is the closest one to the truth].

Godbless!

https://www.amazon.com/Good-News-About-Marriage-Revised/dp/0867166193

Take your time, pray, and realize you and your boyfriend are not perfect but are growing towards Christ together. Sometimes it hurts and it takes time. I highly recommend talking to a priest or married Catholic couples that understand Catholic teaching on sexuality. There are also great catholic websites that discuss further, any YouTube videos or books by Christopher West, also Patrick Coffin's Sex au Naturel