That's really tough and good on you for your self awareness!
Overly strict can really hurt your child in their ability to problem solve, be independent, etc. It can also lead to rebellion, lies and sneaking. It might sound basic, but if there are other parents you admire, follow their lead or ask their advice.
Also listen to your spouse/ partner
There are some books that can help- https://smile.amazon.com/Parents-Raise-Resilient-Children-Self-Discipline-ebook/dp/B086M4198Y
https://smile.amazon.com/Opposite-Worry-Parenting-Childhood-Anxieties/dp/0345539338