This one my Massimo Piggliucci did make things turn around for me, by not changing things that gave me a hard-time, but, by liberating myself out of all that shackled me. I wish you the best to be out of your ordeal, soon!
I think a lot of modern stoics are atheists. Massimo Pigliucci certainly is. Check out his book How to Be a Stoic: https://www.amazon.com/How-Be-Stoic-Ancient-Philosophy/dp/1541644530/ref=mp_s_a_1_5?dchild=1&keywords=massimo+pigliucci&qid=1613362927&sprefix=massimo+pig&sr=8-5
Not sure exactly how bad your insurance situation is but you may want to try looking for a psychologist instead of a therapist. There can be a stigma against drugs, and it can be an arduous journey finding the right prescription of shit, but it can make life so much easier.
I’ve been in your situation. I’ve had friends in your situation. It’s tough, but you can figure it out. If you can manage to find a job you give half a shit about that can help pass the time productively and could maybe help in the friends and satisfaction departments, as well. It doesn’t need to be anything exotic or prestigious to be rewarding, either. There’s plenty of places hiring right now.
I could talk to you till I’m blue in the face and it wouldn’t change anything, though. You’ll overcome that angst and anxiety and depression when you figure it out, my words aren’t going to magically make it better.
I am going to double down on my Buddhism or stoicism comment, though. Stoicism is much, much more than just not showing emotion. It’s a way to live your life with mastery over yourself, calmness in the face of adversity, and compassion for others. I’d recommend picking up a copy of “How to be a Stoic”. I’ll buy you copy or send you an Amazon gift card or something if you can’t get it yourself. Seriously PM me if you want.
I read a lot of non-fiction, but only one book recently i took to heart: How to Be a Stoic: Using Ancient Philosophy to Live a Modern Life.
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I never though that from all things i'll fond a philosophy book. It's great! It's written in beautiful, modern language. It's make you think new things. It's connected me to the past as no history book ever could. And, as the title says - Stoicism is superbly relevant to our times.
Highly recommend it.
Long time listener first time caller.
Massimo Pigliucci has written a couple of books.
A Handbook for New Stoics: How to thrive in a world out of control 52 week-by-week lessons.
I purchased the last book. Each week encourages doing an exercise to be a Stoic.
Good luck.
Worth checking out would be Massimo Pigliucci’s How to be a Stoic and Handbook for New Stoics. The combo gives a perhaps different approach that Ryan’s daily reading while still fostering some solid practice. Another set of books I’d recommend are Matt Van Natta’s 5 Minute Stoicism Journal and Beginner’s Guide to Stoicism. IMO, Matt retains a bit more of the lighter reading mood than Massimo does (which makes sense given Massimo is an academic professor) and even provides a follow up list of works to read. I used these four books when I first started out and the journal and handbook remain part of my daily use.
Single most impactful thing: Being ruthless with cutting out luxuries.
- Streaming & other online subscriptions? Gone.
- Starbucks, Tim's, and others? Gone (replaced with a $15 home coffee maker and some decent grinds and filters from an affordable grocery store).
- Spotify premium? Gone.
- Even home Internet, gone. You can find free wifi if you really need it. Or, do what I do - pay for half of my neighbour's plan for access.
- Smoking and drinking? Severely restricted or gone altogether. Even going out to clubs was/is restricted.
- Even some name-brand foods are gone. It takes some work, but researching Canadian-made food products at dollar stores (particularly pasta and sauces) really helped.
Focusing on make-ahead meals that bring the cost-per-meal down to a few dollars or less per meal is possible, tasty, and healthier than fast food. Invest in healthy food seasonings like Mrs Dash.
- This took me awhile to get used to, but walking and bussing most places in lieu of driving whenever possible. Now, a $100 bus pass for a month and 90% of my commuting / travel needs beats $100 every two weeks for gas.
Some subscriptions I think are good to keep:
- Gym membership (when you're bored and don't have anymore streaming subscriptions, the endorphin wave from even a half-assed workout to kill boredom is really, really nice.).
- Library
- Some subjects and speakers I highly recommend: Stoicism (Ryan Holiday, Massimo Pigliucci), personal insight (Connor Beaton - this guy is massively under-rated, Dr Nicole LePera, Dr Andrew Huberman, and Mark Mason).
This all might sound boring af, and it will feel like that for awhile tbh, but it gets so much better. What helps me is thinking in terms of if I was running a business and cutting all unnecessary costs (the GTD method of "putting your life on project status" by David Allen). Or, if I was a new PC in a new MMORPG looking for ways to play this game that benefit me (aka gamification, see Steve Kamb or Dr Jane McGonigal). I've adapted from social media to free online classes; from watching streaming shows and scrolling social media to working two jobs that I not only enjoy, but that I grow with, for an average of 60 hours per week - being single and no kids at this point, this is a sacrifice I'm wiling to make for a potentially better future - I understand that this is the kind of sacrifice Earl Nightingale, Jim Rohn, Napoleon Hill, Dr Susan Jeffers, Dr Carl Jung, and Dr Jordan Peterson are always talking about.
I swear it's healthier. Check out Dopamine Nation, and Grit for evidence.
Massimo Pigliucci has written a couple of books.
A Handbook for New Stoics: How to thrive in a world out of control 52 week-by-week lessons.
I purchased the last book. Each week encourages doing an exercise to be a Stoic.
If you're interested, a good introductory reading is this one.
I like the Vox Stoica youtube channel, he has many of the foundational texts in audiobook. His reading of Seneca's On the shortness of life was my first approach to Stoicism.
You can find most essays from Epictetus, Marcus Aurelius and Seneca on ebook for free. For more expert directions, if you're interested, you can always ask in r/Stoicism.
Hang on there, man. I don't know what you're going through but this too shall pass. Be strong and keep your thoughts in the now, do your due, it will get better.
They’re both by Massimo Pagliuci...
I’m gonna guess it is this first link here How to Be a Stoic: Using Ancient Philosophy to Live a Modern Life https://www.amazon.com/dp/1541644530/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_i_lu20CbT2HRD2H
Here’s the other one How To Be A Stoic: Ancient Wisdom for Modern Living https://www.amazon.com/dp/184604507X/ref=cm_sw_r_sms_c_api_i_iv20Cb2NSJT2N