OP maybe add this link to the post?
https://www.amazon.com/Hung-Jury-Testimonies-Genital-Transsexual/dp/0615692354
That book completely changed my perspective on Phalloplasty and I am so stoked to get the surgery now; before I had fed into all the negativity surround it and was maybe not going to get it. It’s Hung Jury which is a collection of testimonials from trans men who have actually had phallo and it’s great
Read Hung Jury, it is a collection of firsthand accounts from transmen with phalloplasty, not a bunch of your straight cis friends. Then decide what you want to do.
Hey, I really get where you're coming from. I think it's difficult to effectively categorize discomfort and need when those things are so personal and subjective. Unfortunately, I also think that as trans people there is so much that we are trained to just "get over", "get used to", or "give up" on - especially when it comes to medicalization and surgical options. There's a great book called Hung Jury: Testimonies of Genital Surgery by Transsexual Men (I'll include a link below). It's exactly what it sounds like and includes the written experiences of many different transmen who undergo lower surgery, their need for it, the process, how they felt before and after, etc. It also aims to break down the stigma around lower surgery that seems to be widely perpetuated by the medical community and in turn, also by pre or non-op transmen (the book does a much better job describing this and addressing it). This book helped me pin point and understand my need for lower surgery and helped articulate why it's so important to me personally, and to reevaluate my own previously held beliefs surrounding lower surgery and its outcomes. I guess what I'm driving at is, don't let any one person or institution dissuade you from doing what you need to do to be comfortable in your own skin. If that's waiting until the time is right for surgery, then wait. If that's getting the biggest dick and balls you can, then fucking go for it! It's your body and your decision. I know all of this is so much easier said than done, and I hope I don't come off preachy. I just feel passionately that we should lift one another up to make the decisions we need to make to reclaim our bodies in a way that is comfortable to us each individually. Whatever choice you make, I hope that it brings you peace and fulfillment 🤙
Edit: whoops said all that and forgot to post a link!! https://www.amazon.com/dp/0615692354/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_XYzrFbBBZEDD1