I'm in the same boat. My wife also made the mediation appointment today. There's nothing you and I can really do other than state the desire to see a counselor and work things out. It was like a gut punch having her say that she feels all options have been exhausted. At the same time, it's a bit liberating to not be in limbo in my mind.
I highly recommend this book. It has helped me reframe my mindset on the separation and divorce. I'm hurting a lot, but trying to accept the hurt rather than fight and bargain with someone that isn't interested at all.
I'm so sorry you're going through this pain. This is a test of who you are. Are you going to give in to this pain and go down a dark path, or will you strive to find healthy solutions? Just like you researched that article, I recommend you read some books about rebuilding after divorce.
Check out this gem of a book on Amazon (free with Kindle Unlimited), which will help you sort through the whirlwind of emotions: https://www.amazon.com/Wish-Knew-This-Before-Divorce-ebook/dp/B07B126L6F/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=1600479221&sr=8-1
Another book someone on this subreddit recently recommended is "Rebuilding: When your relationship ends" by Bruce Fisher.
You are not alone. This pain is terrible but it IS temporary. That's just the way the human body and brain work -- your body knows what to do to recover from this. Just work with it (cry, exercise, journal, continue therapy). The pain will dissipate in time (on another note, in many cases pain can serve to build strength and character-- but we shouldn't dwell on it forever).
As for the "problem" that you think is permanent. Firstly we do not know if the divorce is indeed a problem. You might think it is because of the pain but again, pain is temporary. Perhaps the divorce was actually a solution to other problems and may have avoided long-term unhappiness.
Regardless, this divorce does not define your entire life. Even if you made mistakes, they do not define you and you can learn and grow from them. For example, if you feel you falsely accused her perhaps in the future you will strive to ask with curiosity and openness rather than make an assumption (with anyone who crosses your path). I encourage you to show yourself compassion -- we've all done things we regret. I like this quote: "Think: all men make mistakes, but a good man yields when he knows his course is wrong, and repairs the evil: The only crime is pride." Mistakes are part of being human and we all can improve and grow if we strive to do so.
None of us knows what the future holds. What we *do* know is that we each must work on ourselves/become the best possible version of ourselves.
Since this is recent, take it one day at a time and try to be in the present moment as much as you can. There is an exercise I really like, "five-five-five." Name five things you see, five things you hear, and five things you feel right now. It will bring you back to the present moment and clear your head from negative thoughts.
You can get through this. Choose life, and it will choose you.