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Before you go and negotiate the salary read THIS book. Or do the audio book. There is a section on negotiating salary but the whole book is useful. Really changed the way I talk with people.
Practice. Lots of practice. If you go into a negotiation not willing to lose it all, you've already lost.
Interview for jobs. You should always be looking.
Making friend and influencing people is good.
Also: Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062407805/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_tWsWBbKWP1BB7
>You could give them a counter offer if you're considering turning them down.
I use an extreme anchor, and it works very very well. It's almost like magic.
I know the high end for a sys engineer pay in my area. If I can't get them to give me an offered salary for the position, I'll tell them a number 30% higher than that that is oddly specific, like I did the math and knew something they didn't.
One of two things happen. Either they fold entirely and say the offered salary, which is usually half of what I think is fair, or they continue talking to me. Any time there isn't a hard NO from them, I have the upper hand.
Giving that extreme anchor also inclines them to go straight to their max, illicit an emotional response from them in several ways that benefit me, puts their negotiation on the back foot, and give me valuable details for any counteroffer they may want to give me. This tactic got me +15k over my current employers' stated maximum offer.
>Chris Voss is a former FBI Hostage Negotiator and he's got some great ideas about negotiating salaries.
He's also got a book on negotiating too. I'm reading it now. It's an easy to digest book so far. Only two chapters in so can't speak to how good the advice is or how applicable it is to compensation negotiations.
How to never split the difference.
Never Split the Difference. It's a book about negotiation, which may sound super-specific, until you realize that all conversations you have are negotiations. With your own manager, with your customers and clients, with your reports. There may not be high stakes in most of them, but gathering information and earning Ws all the time pays off in the long run.
The thing is, you can protect your boundaries without resorting to hostility. Just calmly asking "How can that work for me, given that... <whatever issues the proposed boundary crossing raises for you>?" is a good start.
Beyond repression of anger, there is a range of behaviors which suppress the hostile response, but still protect your interests.
<em>Never Split the Difference</em> is a good book about nonviolent negotiation strategies (by a former FBI hostage negotiator.)
Speed read Never Split The Difference and get all that money back with a lot of direct eye contact and your hands on the counter when you speak to the manager. https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805/ref=nodl_
First you interview so both sides agree they want the deal. You’re selling labor (supply) they need it (demand).
After both sides agree that “the right deal” likely exists (verbal non binding) the buyer makes a bid.
You the seller request concessions because supply < demand (always). Biz buy labor to profit (duh) so not hiring someone is second most expensive choice to picking wrong person. Remember we also established your the guy from previous step.
After agreeing on deal structure they document it. You should also document in email agreement process. “Alice will confirm if +5 PTO days is accessible to management “
Next, triple check their written offer matches the tentative agreements from negotiations. If it’s missing it won’t happen later
Then with leverage the written over against other offers to get best price for labor.
Lastly tech is very tiny world be polite when you quit but assuming they’ll screw you. Give them a weeks notice, never a month
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062407805/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_YCVXPFMXA3NRD12NA0D6
I would aim higher than 120k honestly given your background. You could still turn around that specific call too if it goes on. You could say something after the next round like:
> Having heard more about the position, needed skills, and responsibilities, I would need $xyz-k salary.
This is an excellent book on negotiation if you need more support in this area: Never Split the Difference
Getting to the "Yes, exactly that." moment with the customer. When you've drilled through all of the noise and actually understood their motivators and have presented the appropriate solution. Such a huge hit for me.
"Forgive me father, that I have sinned".
Contact them, tell the truth, no matter how banal. Take responsibility and ask for a second chance.
The first sentence is a line from this book, used in this type of context
Most orgs don’t understand good product practice.
1) do you LOVE being a product manager?
2) if yes then don take this personal and work on your emotional intelligence, managing up, and coaching.
learn how to read your audience. For execs that means knowing what targets to hit. For teams it’s enabling them to be successful.
learn how to persuade. Start with the book “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It https://www.amazon.com/dp/0062407805/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_HVR8RK3CV41Z5JEVEG0R
learn how to interview companies as hard as they interview you - find the right culture
Book by Christopher Voss who is a very prolific negotiator. Covers a good amount of stuff.
There's also a common acronym called MOREPIES, which in negotiations stands for
Open Ended Questions
These are the basics. I don't mind going in depth a little more if you're curious. I've even got my thicc boy FBI training manual on hand as well.
Am citit un pic despre asta ca și eu am căzut în capcană. E o carte interesantă care atinge oarecum tema asta: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Practic acum se aplică și la copiii mici, când sunt supărați și îți povestesc ce s-a întâmplat. Sunt câteva tehnici unde ii indemni ușor să dea mai multe detalii (arăți empatie) și unde încerci să dai un nume la ceea ce simt (furie, neputință etc.). Ultima într-un fel le valideaza ca e ok ca au emotii spre situația respectivă și e foarte normal sa încerce să analizeze ce s-a întâmplat și ce ar putea să îi ajute sa treacă peste. Am testat deocamdată puțin la adulți supărați, a mers mult mai bine decât mă așteptam. Înainte nu știam ce să zic, așa că umpleam cu "da, si eu am pățit la fel".
Even the meekest of people are likely to be great active listeners. They're paying attention when we're speaking, even if they never participate.
The key, I think, would be to build up the confidence to make them participate.
I think the best place to start them off would be the book on negotiation... pulls book out of a hat... This book drove a lot of that change. It's a systematic approach to negotiation that has all the rules and guidelines SWEs love to build on.
Now, yes, it sounds insane that I'm advocating we jump all the way to negotiation when they can't even hold a conversation. But honestly, almost all conversations are negotiations. Most of them have almost no risk involved, and so your report can benefit from latching on to these with mirror questions. "Mirror questions?"
Glad you asked, mirror questions are basically a simple repetition of the most important point that they've been trying to make, to demonstrate you've been paying attention to everything that's being said. Getting people to restate that information shows they're listening. Once they're brave enough, they can change these into questions where they infer the mirror rather than state the mirror.
Definitely. I think the biggest key to understanding how to become a better communicator is to recognizing that the best communicators don't necessarily command talking the entire time. Great communicators listen, THEN act, when necessary. And for those of us who are naturally less likely to speak, we are REALLY good at listening. At the risk of continuing to pedal my favorite book Never Split the Difference using this type of methodology gives you the ability to gain insight on people by letting them do all the hard work, and you only need to connect the dots.
Ex-meek developer reporting in!
For me it came down a very basic concept: learning how to negotiate, and then practicing it as much as possible. I did this in tandem with business school, but you could easily substitute classmates for something like a Toastmasters program if you need additional help.
Now, this sounds weird, because negotiation doesn't seem like a major skill we need outside of interviews, but we actually do it almost any time we communicate as developers. Don't believe me?
> Hey, can you take a look at my pull request real quick?
The stakes are pretty low, but the responses are endless.
A simple question that you can turn into a variety of conversations. We talk about edge cases in our code. When communicating, the edge cases are limitless.
If you're on Slack and a question pops up, ask for a Zoom chat. No video if you're not comfortable, but I find that the more information I can get about the other person, the better I can get a read for how to calibrate my responses to them.
Some people have a hate relationship with Never Split the Difference but if you get past the first chapter, the soft skills it presents are easy to practice and easy to put into play. Voss also has a Masterclass if you prefer one of those.
I married a lot of these techniques to my formerly introverted communication style, and focused heavily on the active listening because frankly that's what most of us meek people are best at, just listening, and then using that information to take command of the conversation.
Also, I’d recommend reading “Never split the difference”. It’s a great book on how to effectively negotiate. When my startup was acquired, we all read the book during the acquisition talks.
Yup. Negotiations are an information-driven game. You've provided them information that you really want to work here, without the counter-information that it's your only choice.
And you've done it without lying, which some people are against doing.
You may find this book on negotiation useful.
Check out this book that helps handles things like negotiation/conflict. This can help you pinpoint an approach you’ve likely already used but position in a way that references this highly loved book in CS https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Right on. In that case, check out Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss. It's an awesome book about negotiation tactics and social interactions, written by a guy who was a top negotiator for the FBI for decades. I use stuff I learned from the book all the time and it often seems to work very well.
Will check out this tennis book you mentioned
Glad everyone is enjoying the interview. Heres the book that Murat mentioned as being a huge help in figuring out how to grow and keep the startup alive
Never Split the Difference
> I tried talking with my manager about this but he gave me the usual budget talk and we decided I would at least get more paid vacation days, but I'm still not happy.
Your boss decided; you accepted.
Just in the context of this sentence, I can not recommend the book Never Split the Difference highly enough. I’m not saying it will make you an expert negotiator with one read — that, of course, takes practice — but it will open your eyes to the psychology of why the conversation you had didn’t go the way you wanted and how you can handle those co versatile a in the future.
This book is SO GOOD, for many aspects of life independent of negotiating. Turns out negotiating is all about psychology and relationships, which is a big part of the rest of life.
It can take some work, and it may feel awkward at first, but you can get better with practice. Generally, start questions with "How...?", "What...?" or "Why...?" Another thing that works well is some variation of "Tell me more about...", for instance "Tell me more about why you feel that way."
Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss is technically about negotiating, but it has great techniques you can integrate into your every day life to help you with situations like this.
Read Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if your life depended on it by Chris Voss
It has different ways to think, approach people, and what to look for when it comes to getting what you want.
Some key points may be...
1. Get them to solve your problems.
2. Speaking in a negotiating tone of voice(when to do what voice, his favorite is the late night fm DJ voice, but he typically recommends as a default the friendly tone).
3. Getting them to say "that's right" or something equivalent.
I know I'm not doing the book justice, but it's a start for you to know what I'm sayin. Chris Voss did an AMA earlier this year.
Link on Amazon
SWE here. I definitely saw a huge pay bump after reading and leveling up my negotiation skills. I wonder if the type of people (gamers, nerds, my people honestly) tend to just be more introverted and thus less likely to aggressive negotiate with the recruiters. It's definitely not something most are trained at, so it's a situation where one side has a ton of practice doing it (e.g. a Blizzard Recruiter) vs the employee who doesn't have the same wealth of knowledge the other side does.
https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805 was a great help
Hi egnima_man! Sorry to hear that you're going through a rough patch. Thanks for reaching out! Being proactive definitely is the way to go!
I don't know the specifics of your particular case, so the best thing that anyone could do is give you very high level pointers.
I would like to recommend you the experience of someone who's dealt with all kinds of "negotiation" situations, although the book's underlying concepts are not about negotiating; it's more about how to coexist with other people.
The book is "Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It". It comes from Chris Voss, former FBI hostage negotiator. He developed the modern approach to negotiating hostage situations, helping save many, many lives.
A very short and single viewpoint summary is that it's about helping others help you.
I recommend everyone reading through this book, because it has had a very high return on my life, and because it's not about imposing your will; it's about sharing it.
Here's an Amazon link:
Feel free to ask me any questions!
In this episode of the Waking Up podcast, Sam Harris speaks with Chris Voss about his experience as a hostage negotiator for the FBI. They discuss different types of hostage crises, along with many of the lessons that apply to negotiating in normal life.
Chris Voss is a 24-year veteran of the FBI and one of the world’s preeminent experts on the art of negotiation. He is the founder and principal of The Black Swan Group, a consulting firm that provides training and advises Fortune 500 companies through complex negotiations. Voss has taught for many business schools, including the University of Southern California’s Marshall School of Business, Georgetown University’s McDonough School of Business, Harvard University, MIT’s Sloan School of Management, and Northwestern University’s Kellogg School of Management, among others. He is the author of <em>Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On it</em>.
Everything is negotiable. Always. It's just a matter of knowing how to do it right. Which is the tricky part of course!
If it were me in your shoes:
I wouldn't accept a pay cut.
I'd try really hard to not get re-evaluated.
I'd ask for, but wouldn't be very disappointed if it can't happen: some paid time to move, and some relocation expenses.
p.s. For some negotiating tips, this book wasn't too bad imo: https://www.amazon.ca/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Fwiw the FBI actually does negotiate with kidnappers. I just read a book by someone who used to be their lead hostage negotiator. In many cases the kidnappers would never be caught, but the families would end up paying only a few thousand dollars instead of the million or so originally demanded.
" how to analyze properties "
"what to avoid when negotiating "
"searching - finding- closing on good deals"m
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It
I highly recommend this book.
When negotiating start by spilling out all of your weaknesses and shortcomings.
Hey everyone. I’m a 9w1 who would just like to recommend this book to other 9s. I’ve listened to it all the way through at least three times.
I’m not going to say it has “cured” me of being conflict avoidant, but I will say it has helped me learn tools to deal with conflict and even embrace the concept that conflict is necessary and healthy. As 9s we’re eventually pushed to conflict whether we like it or not. I think our main problem is that we push it off so much that when we are finally forced into conflict it’s in very dramatic terms and we’re very triggered and angry. In essence we explode.
Learning to deal with conflict early, and in a healthy manner is key, IMO. I’m also a big fan of Talking to Strangers, just as a fun, information oriented book to help us learn the common pitfalls of communication.
Great advice in this thread for sure... I just came to add some recommended reading: Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss.
edited to include a link https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Iti recomand cateva resurse pentru astfel de conversatii:
Chriss Voss e genial, negociator FBI etc
Harvard Program on Negotiation sunt un grup de profesori/cercetatori care lucreaza cu tot felul de conflicte (inclusiv razboaie) si negocieri. Sunt doua carti foarte misto scoase de ei
Sincer orice de aici e bun, just pick one. In felul asta vei deveni mai bun in a avea conversatii dificile de orice fel, nu doar asta, si, sincer, iti va creste niste abilitati esentiale care te vor face si mai valoros pe piata muncii.
I'd like to hold $25. I immediately chose the lowest price I've seen anyone offer and
Don’t think about fair. You can negóciate your compensation and never split the difference.
You need to read a self help book on negotiating. Recommend Chris Voss - Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It
Sto se tice pregovaranja u zivotu ima dosta korisna knjiga.
Never Split The Difference.
I bought a Kindle that helped me for a bit. Here is a list of interesting books in my opinion. Audibooks have been so helpful as well!
The Divine Comedy The Divine Comedy
The Book of Mormon: Another Testament of Jesus Christ
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As if Your Life Depended On It
Ich kann etwas über meinen Weg erzählen, allerdings muss das nicht zwangsweise hilfreich sein.
Mit 23 war ich gerade auf der Zielgeraden meines Studiums der Wirtschaftspsychologie. Der Studiengang war eigentlich ziemlich cool, aber ich war gegen Ende nicht mehr so ganz am Ball, da ich mit einem Studienkollegen und meiner damaligen Freundin (heute Frau und Mutter von 2 Kindern) ein Startup gründete.
Dieses Startup sollte nach nichtmal zwei Jahren gründlich scheitern, setzte aber gleichzeitig den Grundstein für den Rest meiner Karriere. Für unser Startup brauchten wir eine Android und iOS App, ein Backend, eine Website, eine Datenbank, etc..
Ich erinnere mich noch, wie ich Videos von SlideNerd schaute um irgendwie zu verstehen, wie man eine App baut. Die ersten zwei Monate waren der Horror. Ich hab es einfach nicht verstanden. Ich wollte immer wieder aufgeben, spielte Computer (Anno 1602 Endlosspiel =) oder gab einfach nur vor, die App zu entwickeln.
Wie bereits gesagt, das Startup scheiterte, doch ich hatte einiges gelernt und war ziemlich selbstbewusst. Ich konnte mit egal wem auf einem guten Niveau diskutieren, da ich ja selbst alles entwickeln konnte. Apps, Websites, Backends, DevOps, Kubernetes, etc.. Also dachte ich, dass ich bereit bin, als Entwickler irgendwo zu arbeiten.
Mir ist dann mehr durch Zufall eine Stelle als IT Architekt aufgefallen. Eigentlich hatte ich schon einen anderen Vertrag unterschrieben, doch die Architekten Stelle sprach mich und meine breiten skills einfach sehr stark an. Ich wusste, dass ich nicht genug Erfahrung habe, aber das sollte einen nicht davon abhalten, sich zu bewerben.
Long story short, selbstsicheres Auftreten und mein breites Wissen haben gereicht um Architekt zu werden.
Ein paar Tipps: Es hilft sehr, wenn man alles mal gemacht hat. So versteht man die verschiedenen Stakeholder sehr gut. Als Architekt sitzt man fast den ganzen Tag in Meetings und koordiniert. So war es bei mir jedenfalls. Muss man mögen. Dafür hat man auf allen Ebenen impact. Mir hätte damals noch geholfen, mehr über APIs und API Spezifikationen zu wissen, z.B. REST, OpenAPI, GraphQL, gRPC, SOAP, ODATA etc..
Wenn du gerade nicht die Zeit, Lust oder Möglichkeit hast, ein Startup zu gründen, dann versuche es vielleicht im Consulting, in alle Richtungen reinzuschauen und in wenigen Jahren möglichst alle Stationen zu durchlaufen. Und dann im Zweifel einfach so lange bewerben, bis dich jemand zum Architekten macht. =)
In der IT gibt es keine Prüfung um irgend eine Rolle zu bekommen. Du wirst Architekt, wenn jemand denkt, dass du einer sein solltest. Im Zweifel muss diese Person nur weniger wissen als du, oder denken, dass du der bzw. die Richtige ist.
Einer der wichtigsten Skills in der IT ist es, (sich) verkaufen zu können. Du musst eine Idee verkaufen können, ein Produkt, ein Team überzeugen können, den CTO überzeugen, den CEO, einen Kunden im Support. Überall geht es darum zu überzeugen.
Als inspiration hat mir sehr stark das buch Never Split The Difference von Chris Voss geholfen. Beim verhandeln dreht sich alles sehr stark um Empathie, die andere Seite zu verstehen. Wenn du wirklich verstehst, was dein Gegenüber will, dann ist verhandeln umso einfacher. Bezogen auf das "Architekt werden", finde heraus warum die Firma diese Rolle besetzen will. Welche Probleme müssen gelöst werden? Wenn du den Kern des Problems findest, wird es deutlich einfacher, sich als Lösung zu präsentieren.
Never Split the Difference
When you negotiate with your scrum team or ask for a raise.
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It https://smile.amazon.com/dp/0062407805/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_38Q6KHJ6TB6VW16DQGP0
Learn to negotiate.
"never split the difference" https://www.amazon.ca/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805, available on pdf on the net, you can just print it.
Never split the Difference by Chis Voss https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805/
It's actually a bit more complex than that, and if you really want to read something interesting on the matter, I suggest this: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
^Item&nbsp;Info | Bot&nbsp;Info | Trigger
You need to read this: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
Never Split the Difference: Negotiating as if your Life Depended on It
I know you’re being facetious but there is actually an answer to this question: car dealerships.
Read this book: Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It
Binge this YouTube channel: https://youtube.com/c/KevinHunter
Never Split the Difference. I got this on a whim, read it, then it was required reading for our Negotiations and Conflict Management course in b-school.
I highly recommend Legendary Tactics deep dive into playing each of the powers with some of the best Diplomacy players in hobby history: https://youtube.com/playlist?list=PLB-PbNJJ_F4xUO7lYuYF9rI-1X39pEIQL
This will offer tips for how to approach Diplomacy for each power.
For a less game focus, I thought this was interesting book about negotiations: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805/ref=nodl_
Sounds like the board members had an argument and they agreed to split the difference, thus creating a potentially-worse situation.
How do you get to be a Senior without the ability to code? Boy that statement is going to piss off some people here but it's true.
The answer is, even in the 80's. You weren't a Sr Admin without knowing how to code and eliminate your job and that is a vital skill. Doing that is a function of knowing how to architect. Architecture is about knowing how to prevent work, and if you are good at preventing work, you will make a lot of money. In short, you convince people what doesn't need to be done and why.
Watch this at minimum 3 times and, if you have not already, pick up at least one object oriented programming language and spend time with your favorite music and caffienated beverage on hackerrank cranking algo's. People like to get pissed off at me for saying that but trust me, do it. It will make everything make more sense to you.
While you are doing that, read this book and spend time looking at how you could've negotiated better in the past so that in the future you do not leave money or opportunities on the table because some room temp IQ sales motherfucker uses some technique you don't know about.
Then I suggest you read this guy’s book, I can understand the principles he laid out, problem is keeping the cool head to be able to negotiate with even crazy people....somewhat
Simply laying out the arguments and illogic can only do so much
Please go buy the book: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
There are some videos about how to make a successful twitch channel. View trading might get you affiliate, but if you're struggling to get viewers, you might be in an oversaturated market, you might be boring, or you're streaming at the wrong time. Affiliate on twitch doesn't help a whole lot in fixing those problems.
I'm building a youtube channel and I could get a lot of people to watch my videos. I have a high ctr, but if my videos are boring and no one watches it, then youtube stops promoting the video after 1 - 2 days.
Oversaturated games have an average active viewers/ stream around 20 or less. Good games to stream have about 30, and underserved games are 60+. Lots of the advice I've seen say, plan your stream so you're always talking, even if there are 0 people watching. Have engaging stream titles that make people feel like responding. "Best pos 1 dazzle NA" and you get people coming in to rage or curious. Things like funny jokes in your title get people into the stream. Do community events once a week while hyping up your plan for the next week. have a consistent schedule that fits with the most active viewers. You don't have to stream every day. Plan your content in advance including jokes, conversation topics, talking points about the game, and things that your community can ask from you.
Try to rank in search with tags, and be near the top of the search. If you're not on the first line with your current active viewers (friends family members, I guess us if you're desperate), then you should find a smaller game to start on. Build the community around you and not the game so it's easier to switch to another game if the current game dies.
Remember, when asking for help, A) offer a token gift B) ask for far more help than you need C) if people still refuse to help but they're still willing to bargain, ask them to bargain from your position D) the help you need should be a specific action.
gifts prompt people to reciprocate and most neurotypical people feel obligation guilt if they don't. Religous groups regularly present token gifts like flowers and poetry before asking for donations knowing people will immediately trash them. At the end of the day, they even collect the trashed gifts to use again.
If you ask for more than you need, accepting less than your initial amount makes your bargaining partner feel like they got a good deal. The watergate's original proposal sounded like a blockbuster marvel or james bond movie. After three concessions, the final proposal to infiltrate the watergate sounded reasonable even though the commitee that approved it later regretted the decision.
If you appeal to people's vanity, asking for their intelligence, they will bargain against themselves for you. This one comes from one of the top hostage negotiators.
if you need help (this goes for dota) you should specifically ask a person by name or defining trait for exactly what you need. This makes it so your plight doesn't go ignored. Heart attacks, defending the t2 tower, it doesn't matter.
I do career coaching, dota coaching, and I coach other games. Hit me up if you need help. If you refer me a customer you earn 5% of my first sale.
the psychology of persuasion
chriss voss masterclass on negotiation
and his book Never split the difference.
How to grow 0 -25 twitch viewers in 60 days
0 - 100 viewers in 6 months
Hmm, looks like you aren’t a master reader either. After you learn to read, give this a look:
Are you looking to do this? Because this book is worth it’s price just on the section on negotiating salaries (the whole book is great).
Never Split the Difference by Chris Voss is a good start.
Book “Never Split the Difference: Negotiating As If Your Life Depended On It”
>The other person is probably paid current market rate. You trapped yourself by taking the low offer and then again by saying you want a certain salary in the future despite not knowing what the going rate in the future would be.You got the rate that you ASKED FOR and now you’re mad because someone else got a higher salary. Can’t win this fight, sorry.I hope you take this as a hard lesson and learn from it well. On top of all that, you have to realize that no one really cares about you putting in your “heart and soul” into your support role. A business is in the business of making money.
OP you should read this. It helped me alot when it comes to negotiating.
And Never Split The Difference
Essa tua jogada faz parte das técnicas de negociação descritas neste livro.
Foi uma Extreme Anchor um pouco extremely.
I'll give you two book tips:
I don't know if you can order these books. Both are available as EPUB as well if you use a normal e-reader or laptop.
Check out Chris Voss. There are ways to get people off of the defensive. The head nod, a Voss technique, destroyed the interruptions issue on the first try, a life long issue. I’m in a similar place and can’t explain my goals or dreams to anyone, because everyone has “my best interest in mind,” when they try and convince me to play is safe and settle for little.
The consequences of having done everything I don’t want to please others, is that it’s very hard to get respect for who I actually am. My aim is to dress really good and of course I immediately got this: “Good, but not too well, better keep it down.” In a way, it feels I will have to wait until everyone I know is dead, and then I can start living my life.
Used to be very introverted. Also had very low self-esteem. Now I’m becoming extroverted. I am beginning to own social situations even when my head is so drowsy. I don’t believe in these labels. I see these two as a curse from the expectations of society. A lazy way to put us into time saving boxes, to save the tribe time for hierarchy organizing.
Chris Voss, Former FBI hostage negotiator world wide:
A few things.
edit: i will add that the fact that they have asked for this change rather than just firing you suggests #2
This book tends to be helpful:
It's a really good read on negotiation.
Might I recomend: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805
I love this book for thinking on how to get a great deal from vendors, bosses or really, anywhere.
Amazon have the same issue you do, so I would have a look at how they deal with it. (I've done it for you :)) They are absolutely killing it in the eCommerce SEO world so their word should be considered gospel.
So how do Amazon solve this issue? Well, they create almost completely different pages. Take a look at this hardcover version versus the kindle version. It's the same book with the same reviews etc, but the pages are very different.
In addition to the original content, they've also placed a rel=canonical tag to the main landing page, to clarify the structure of the website to Google. (To check the canonical tag, check out the Open SEO stats chrome extension, or just view the source code)
This is the ideal scenario. If you dont have the resources or time to provide this kind of originality, try and find the sweet spot between originality and your resources.
I’m a pretty big inarticulate moron. If you’re actually interested, this book is really good and a very easy read: https://www.amazon.com/Never-Split-Difference-Negotiating-Depended/dp/0062407805