Now you get to learn that God's love doesn't depend on what you do or don't get right.
It's hard to let go of the dream of being "God's awesome champion princess" and embrace being "one more of God's beloved f***-ups", but it has the advantage of actually being real.
My book recommendation for today is Pastrix.
As others (like /u/CGMandC) have noted on here, the prosperity-gospel level of dialogue around this can be really uncomfortable. I just went through a health crisis with my mom, and read a chapter of Nadia Bolz-Weber's book where she talks about her work as a hospital chaplain. The essay centers around how to reconcile God and suffering, and it really helped me with a lot of my feelings and theology.
She ends the chapter by writing: "We want to go to God for answers, but sometimes what we get is God's presence."
It's in her book Pastrix, and I highly recommend it if you're the kind of person who is happy to find a book written by a pastor was positively reviewed by Bitch magazine. Here it is on Google Books if you'd like to read this chapter in full, and here are some quotes from that specific chapter on some man named Frank's blog.
Is it time for you to investigate some new churches? And maybe read some of my faves like Pastrix, Searching for Sunday...