What is Reddit's opinion of Perfect Daughters: Adult Daughters of Alcoholics?

From 3.5 billion Reddit comments

My father-in-law is a high level functioning alcoholic. My mother is just a regular terrible alcoholic. I found having a little bit of experience with both, that both are incredibly subversive. The notion that you brought out about addressing your mother's drinking at 12 and getting disbarred by your family is so painfully familiar. I found reading the book Perfect Daughters to be really helpful for me in understanding how my mother's alcoholism has affected my adult life so profoundly. Therapy has also been incredibly helpful.

>He’ll later totally forget how HE acted and will only remember how I (poorly) acted.

Are you sure about that? A lot of abusive partners live by a double standard and do not examine their own actions and behaviors, only those of their SOs. They are not stupid, but they will find ways to rationalize the poor behavior they engage in and justify it.

You mention having children, and I think this book may be eye opening for you to look into.

I would also caution against remaining in the marriage if your husband is unwilling to seek help with his addiction. He may get angry and upset, but he needs help to become a healthy and stable person for your relationship, your children, and his own sense of self.

There is only so much you can do. At the end of the day, he must make a decision to get well and show up. No one can choose that for him, which is really difficult for those who love the addict. You should ask yourself how much longer can this go on for without it becoming a massive detriment to you and your children?

You sound really self-aware but if you ever feel like your upbringing is causing problems in your personal life, maybe a book like this would be helpful? http://www.amazon.com/Perfect-Daughters-Adult-Alcoholics/dp/1558749527 Otherwise good luck to you.