What is Reddit's opinion of Psycho-Cybernetics, A New Way to Get More Living Out of Life?

From 3.5 billion Reddit comments

I have the 3rd one, by Steve Andreas, read it a long time ago when I was just starting with NLP. I liked it, but I dont know if it would be my recommendation for a beginner. Actually, I think a good one to start is "Psycho-Cybernetics" by dr Maxwell Maltz http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1428592103&sr=1-1&keywords=psycho-cybernetics

There's a book called Psycho-Cybernetics that is the book on understanding and rebuilding self-image. That and No More Mr Nice Guy should be recommended reading for everyone in this subreddit.

Try reading Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz. I just began reading it not too long ago and it covers changing your personality. The book is often referred to as the original self-help book. Don't believe when people say it's impossible. You aren't the same person you were 10 years ago. People are always changing based on their experiences. You can create the experiences to make yourself into the person you want to be.

Thank you for reading, Occasu.

Completely agree with change being a process (and truly one that is ongoing constantly whether you're aware of it or not).

Highly recommend the book Psycho-Cybernetics. That is what I'm currently reading & inspired a chunk of the article.

Link to book: http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758

Right now i'm reading this book, personally i don't have self-image issue, but still find it pretty useful.

http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758

To sum it up, it was written by a plastic surgeon. His observation was, that some people go through a surgery to "fix" something that cripples they self image, and after the surgery they became really self-confident (since the problem is fixed). But some patients - even when the surgery was successful - they can't SEE the change.

Well, in your case, you lost the weight, but your self-image is still the same, it's not healed. As i mentioned, i'm not done with the book yet, but the purpose of this book is, to help you to fix your self-image.

p.s.: you can even find the audiobook version on youtube, wink, wink

> People tell me I'm cute though

You deserve to tell yourself that, too!

I usually don't recommend this to people I don't know, because it's somewhat dated and at times overreaching, but you might benefit from Psycho-Cybernetics.

Maltz wrote it for some of his patients who after going through cosmetic surgery still felt incomplete and/or undesirable. I read it in my teens after changing from a shy scrawny kid into a fairly typical man, but still feeling like a little boy inside. It helped me reassess my self-image and deal with some emotional insecurities that I had carried around with me. Maybe it'll do the same for you?

Seriously, read Psycho-Cybernetics, it's not a multi-million copy bestseller for nothing.

That sounds a lot like Psycho-Cybernetics, a very interesting book (and an easy read, to-the-point), By Maxwell Maltz in the 1960s.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Psycho-Cybernetics

At Amazon--

https://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758/

I decided to try some of the suggestions in the book, and really threw myself, my imagination and my emotions, into the project, as intensely and as often as I wanted, without thinking about what the results might be, just having fun with it to see what (if anything) happened.

Within days, when I didn't expect it, I felt strong, almost irresistably compelling impulses to do or say certain things, which had strong and surprising results that mirrored what I had imagined or felt. I learned that I needed to be a little more careful about exactly what I imagined, to fine-tune things so that it was more in line with what I was comfortable with and really wanted, not just what I thought I wanted. (Kind of like the saying, "be careful what you wish for.")

But it was very convincing to me that our thoughts and emotions, especially if we don't have any other thoughts and emotions or beliefs that work against them (including the beliefs we may not realize we have because we've had them so long or they have become so established or deep-rooted in our psyche that they seem like "just the way things are").

I highly recommend this book to anyone who just wants to experiment and play with the idea of consciously using and directing their imagination and feelings to produce various results within their life. In my case, one of the things that helped me to vividly imagine and feel the emotions and thoughts that accompanied some type of scene or another, was to think of it as a strong and important memory (even though it had not happened yet), because what has happened to us in the past (whether that past is imagined or what actually happened) can seem more real, more "said and done," more like a "fait accompli," than imagining an uncertain future.

Anyway, it's really fun to play with these techniques, and the results can be truly surprising. But when I did it, it also highlighted some things in my psyche (primarily beliefs about reality) that were contrary to what I was imagining, so I began to observe and question, and then try to change those beliefs as well, so they wouldn't work against me.

Another book (well, a few books) that strongly influenced me, even though I was very skeptical of them at the time the first one crossed my path, are the "Seth books" by Jane Roberts, including "Seth Speaks" and "The Nature of Personal Reality." They ended up being profoundly interesting (and influential) to me.

Seth Speaks (the original paperback, with original cover, the one I read)

https://www.amazon.com/Seth-Speaks-Jane-Roberts/dp/0553205463/

Seth Speaks (a modern reprint), and the full series of Seth books in various formats

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08HGF4SJ9

Anyway, "be happy in the travel; there is no destination." :)

The next step is to ask yourself "ok, but why does my character feel guilty if she doesn't try to help?" What belief about herself and the world did she develop (especially during her early years) that led her to this?

Remember that strong beliefs like the one you chose are often so called "survival systems", aka instructions on how to act in order to be "safe". Safe doesn't necessarily mean physically safe, but as in retaining something that is very important to you, but that was uncertain at some point in your life.

Random example: lovability. Children victims of neglect or abuse often come to believe themselves as unlovable. Since their safety and survival depends on their caretakers offering them love, searching for a way to "control" their situation (the human brain is made to do this), they will blame themselves for being unlovable, and try to instead be more lovable (aka, please their parents). if their parents react well to the attempts to please them in order to be acknowledged, then the child can very well become a people pleaser at all costs. They'll also most likely develop extreme anxiety and tilt when a person doesn't seem to like them or to be satisfied by their attempts to please, and so on. That's because their strongest belief, their survival system confirmed by the "success" it had during their childhood is "to be safe (aka loved), I need to please others at all costs. This is how the world works".

This is the belief that tells us most of what we need to know about the character. How they see themselves (and remember, how you see yourself, built up from your memories and experiences, is also how you act, according to: https://www.amazon.it/Psycho-Cybernetics-Maxwell-Maltz/dp/0671700758), *what they want* (one of the most important things to know), how this belief and idea of themselves leads them to make mistakes that will steer them away from their want, until they change. Also, their path towards change, which will consist of replacing their falwed worldview and survival system with another one (but since their olkd system is basically their identity, the replacement will be painful as hell--it will basically mean killing one's current self and be reborn from its ashes).

Also, their contradictions. In Story, Mckee says that contradictions are the dimensions of a character, and that's true, when they are logical within the context of the character's flawed belief and self-image and how they impede the character in reaching their goal. These contradictions also often happens because the surface goal (aka what the character thinks to want and that they pursue), and the actual goal (what they need to actually be fulfilled) diverge due to the flawed worldview that leads the character to fail to understand what they truly want. Example: a character that wants to be loved, but due to neglect/abandomnent issues, deep inside feels to be unlovable. For this reason, she tries to appear strong and tough, because that warrants respect, and she also pushes away people from her, becuase she fears that if she lets people too close, they'll see behind the facade and recognize her for how she sees themselves (weak and unlovable), and ultimately abandon her. This is just one contradiction that can come from such a flawed view of self/survival systems, but there are much, much more that depends on the particular character that you want to write.

Basically, in order to make a character truly come alive, you need to understand how they see themselves, how they think others see them, what they want on the surface and how that conflicts with what they *truly* want behind all the excuses and narratives that their brain comes up with, and why.

Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz

Your welcome! Glad it helped. The relaxation thing is something most drummers don't want to hear because it seemingly has nothing to do with music. It also makes people feel weird or self-conscious. But it absolutely works. There are several books on the subject that really helped me. https://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758

https://www.amazon.com/Effortless-Mastery-Liberating-Master-Musician/dp/156224003X

https://www.amazon.com/Inner-Game-Music-Barry-Green/dp/0385231261

One other thing I wanted to mention is the concept of dancing and drumming. There is a direct connection between the two. In Bob Moses book Drum Wisdom, he states that it behooves all drummer to dance. I tell tell students, if you're embarrassed about dancing in front of people go in your bedroom, shut the door, and dance. Again, this makes people feel weird, but it works. You don't have to be a good dancer. You just have to learn to relax and move with the music.

I would also add: New Psycho-Cybernetics

Hi! I have a solution that can fix this problem once and for all, don't worry about the other comments for now just follow this. Your fear of failure is a self fulfilling prophecy. The reason you feel you are a failure is because this belief was reaffirmed in you over time, we believe our thoughts and they create a self fulfilling prophecy. A study was done on a student who had bad grades, through hypnosis he had the belief installed in him that he was a success, every morning by a therapist. This led him to become one of the top in his class. There's a book I think everyone should read on this called psycho-cybernetics. I know The name of this book makes it sound boring and complacated but the book is life changing. http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758 If you dont want to read the book you can still stop this cycle of failure, here is how, using these excercises. This will take you ten minutes a day, and it may feel silly at first, but if you do this the level of change it creates will be ridiculous. You will not believe how effective this is. There's a few disclaimers. 1:You have to do this every day for at least 180 days, I reccomend doing it for a whole year. this does not work if you miss a day, if you plan on doing this here and there, or maybe once every second day, just forget it. If you,are not doing this every day you will be wasting your time. 2:It will take 21 days before you start seeing the results of this. Therefore reserve any judgements for these twenty one days, you may feel it is stupid or it will never work, but don't make any judgements until you have done this consistently for 21 days. Here is the excercise.

1: Affirmations, for five minutes every morning you will close your eyes and in your head say the statement "I am a successful person". Over and over in your head for five minutes

2: Visualization: for five minutes every day you will visualise what it is like to be a successful person, e.g sit down and imagine getting a report with a grade A plus (or whatever grades you have in your country), Imagine how this success feels. Get as much detail as possible, where are you sitting, what sounds are there, who is there with you. It's ok if your Visualizatiom is a little hazy at first. Just stick with it. Here's a video on how to properly do visualisations to help you.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q89nSsjWjFs

That's all you have to do, if you do this, you will experience a huge change in your state. It won't require you to put in effort to change your habits you can just relax, that will be taken care of for you by the subconscious mind as you start to get past 21 days of doing this excercise.

This will work, it's not a matter of "maybe if you do this things might change" they are guaranteed to change, this is how the mind works, it is a fact that if you do this properly it will work for you, the only reason it won't work is if you don't do the excercises. And most people don't, they either start strong or fizzle out after a couple weeks. The reason for this is because the mind naturally resists change, this means you may find yourself wanting to stop, maybe after a week of doing this you will start telling yourself it is stupid or it is not working, maybe you'll start telling yourself I must be doing it wrong (this happened to me with visualisations) just be persistent, remember all you have to do is get through those 21 days, than it will become a habit and become easier. I know it seems stupid to think that you will have trouble getting through this, it's only ten minutes a day of simple excercises, but you will experience resistance, it caught me off guard when I started doing visualisations, I found myself stopping twice because I was convinced it would never work, but I used visualisations and affirmations to go from having social anxiety to being outwardly confident.

Stick with these affirmations and visualisations as crazy as they might sound, they work, wonders :)

I prefer this: http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758

Oh man do I have some resources for you buddy after overcoming this misery myself. The plain and simple answer is stop identifying with the negatives and switch that to the positives. If you feel unhealthy out of shape it is in your control to change that, if you have a small dick or ugly face no cure for that sorry so embrace it, "What you can't fix, you feature" I'm pretty average height but I love me tall women so they look down at me(figuratively and physically) and I find it hilarious and make jokes of it and they realize "oh shit this guy isn't insecure" and I earned myself attraction points.

First off the book Psycho Cybernetics covers this self identity talk very well with a lot of research behind how what you think can dictate who you become (less "law of attraction" woowooness and more psychological hacking)

This TED Talk by Amy Cuddy covers more on your body language and how making small tweaks can change your attitude and confidence.

And this video is a shameless self promotion but I made a direct response to the Forever Alone community and just how self damaging their negative outlook is in the long run even if it is meant as a playful joke.

read Psycho-Cybernetics

Negative self image. Check out Psychocybernetics. It's a book by a plastic surgeon about self image. Totally changed my life. Just read the reviews on Amazon: http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758

I suggest reading Psycho-Cybernetics, A New Way to Get More Living Out of Life, it really helped me.

Dude, you have no reason to be here. I'm a dude, but if I were going up against you for the same girl, I'd be worried.

Your problem is in your head. Please, please, please read Psycho-Cybernetics - even just the first chapter will explain a lot about how you're feeling. I'm linking to the Amazon page, but just get it from your library. No need to go spending money unless you really feel like keeping it.

First thing to realize that it will take a LOT LOT OF TIME. The person you are is based on years if not decades of habits and thoughts, and all that will take time to change. Now, the first step to changing your self and identity is to go outside-in. People usually tell you to change the inside, but that is really hard without an external reference to promote and motivate that change. So, you need to dress the way the person you want to become would dress. /r/malefashionadvice would give you a good start on basic wardrobe and grooming. As you work on your personal look, the second step is your mannerism, specially how you carry your self in public and with people. Now, you can't just change over night, but you can start by acting like the person you want for 10 min intervals. "how would i walk, sit, and move, if i am my future 2.0". The important part of this is for visual exercise within your mind. "theater of the mind", where you, alone in your bed/chair, close your eyes and imagine your self acting and thinking the way you want, and this way your brain, has an idea of the what your trying to achieve, and over time, it will slowly take over. A good book to read on this would be "http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1361939983&sr=8-1&keywords=physco+cybernetics"

TL;DR= Start Outside, dress better, and use mental rehearsal to change your self. Start by making a list of the type of qualities and behaviors you would want in a person you want to become.

Psycho Cybernetics -- best 'selfhelp' book ever. It is great and covers a lot of our insecurities. I think it should be mandatory reading during puberty.

http://www.amazon.com/Psycho-Cybernetics-New-More-Living-Life/dp/0671700758