Tantus makes an extremely comfortable butt plug highly recommended. Amazon link but currently out of stock.. Look up on their website they have smaller models with that shape handle.
I don't mind, I'm pretty open in general, so no worries. :)
Yes, the toys are all very expensive, I tend to break cheaper toys and I also like using silicone lube which will ruin lesser quality silicone toys.
I have the lelo elise as my main penetrative vibe, and the we-vibe touch as my main clitoral vibe for when we're having sex. The lelo is definitely stronger, so the lelo lily would probably vibe stronger than the touch, but the touch on max setting is still quite strong!
I can definitely vouch for wevibe's customer service, I moved to Australia after purchasing my original wevibe, and it died on me after a few months. I messaged their customer service and they sent me a new one no questions asked. This one too must have come from a bad batch, and after contacting their customer service I was sent yet another one which is going strong almost a year later.
They are also both waterproof which is nice. Well worth saving up for imo.
As for butt plugs, this is a relatively personal thing, you may not be able to handle various sizes etc. For what you're looking for, (make things tighter during penetration) you'll want something silicone, with a "bulbous" end rather than a thin tapered one, and a thin neck so it's comfy once in.
This Tantus is our current favorite, it's long and full through the middle - perfect during vaginal. It is however quite large, so would probably take lube and some time to get used to. Anything sort of this shape will work though, you want it to be long enough to go almost the length of his dick, and rounded through the middle for fullness.
Tantus also uses really high quality silicone, highly recommend them for toys in general. Hope this helps!
As Diverdick recommended, Tantus' Ryder is a good basic plug, although it might be a bit wide for you to start with. If you think that's the case or you'd rather err on the small side, try the Neo or one of their many similarly-designed plugs. Can't tell you much about the prostate stimulation angle since that's not my arena.
Generally just look out for plugs with a significant difference in diameter between the head and neck - if they're too similar it will just slide right out. If it continues to be a problem, look for ones with an even bigger difference in size, or with the widest part of the plug closer to the neck. Unobtrusive bases will make a big difference during intercourse, as they're less likely to get knocked around by thrusts.
Tantus makes some great plugs, as does Square Peg Toys.
I found that this is the most comfortable plug I own. I haven't tried wearing it all day yet. here