Hello! Former practicing Catholic here. The notion of eternal inescapable hell was a major sticking point in my faith that caused me to want to dig deeper to get at the truth. I had numerous discussions with other Catholics about it. And the more questions I asked, the more I realized they didn't actually have answers, just one-liners they'd rehearsed. Their answers to follow-up questions were all just impromptu guesses, and every Catholic gave a different one. I studied for months and months. I tried cross-referencing doctrines and things the Church had declared in the past with the things it declared now. Things didn't add up.
Ultimately, the book that made things about hell clearer was one by an Eastern Orthodox theologian, David Bently Hart, called That All Shall Be Saved. It made it abundantly clear to me that eternal inescapable hell is incompatible with Christianity. How could an all-loving God ever be okay with a plan that causes his children to be eternally separated from him? How could anyone be happy in heaven knowing their close friends and family could be suffering in hell forever? How could God's plan be called "good," if it ultimately results in a dualism of eternal heaven and hell, where evil would coexist with good forever?
My main suggestion is to listen to debates between Catholics and non-Catholics, and from there, maybe you'll get an idea of what topics to read more. For a long time, I felt that things in Catholicism did not add up. But I couldn't put my finger on exactly why, because I had been trained to not read books by non-Catholics (plus C.S. Lewis, haha), so I had never given "the other side" a chance to speak. Once I did, it was eye-opening, and things made so much more sense.
Try this, maybe?
Catholicism's (imo dubious) teachings on hell were a major factor in my decision to leave it. Two books I always recommend (if you want a second opinion):
If you're interested in universal reconciliation, I recommend the book That All Shall Be Saved by David Bentley Hart, it makes an extremely strong case in my view.
I can recommend two books that helped me get over the fear of hell:
I truly believe the doctrine of hell crumbles under its own weight. Yet I understand and empathize with how hard it is to break the indoctrination of it. Hopefully these can help you. I wish you the best.
Two books really helped me to get over the fear of hell. Copy-pasted response below:
Hell is a nightmarish doctrine. Here's two books that helped me overcome fear of it, maybe they will help you:
Hopefully these can help you. I empathize with how hard it is to break the spell of hell. I wish you the best.
I'll post something that I've posted in the past on this issue:
>I got over my fear of eternal inescapable hell by realizing that it contradicts major tenets of traditional Christianity. In other words, even if Christianity were true, hell can't be. It is 100% a manmade idea.
>
>There's a book by David Bentley Hart, "That All Shall Be Saved," where he absolutely eviscerates the idea of eternal inescapable hell on logical grounds, even from a Christian perspective. I've read dozens of reviews of his book by Christians who preach eternal hell, and nearly all but ~two misrepresent his arguments or focus entirely on his tone. His arguments, in my opinion, are simply unassailable - they can't be answered. For this reason, the book is extremely popular in the r/ChristianUniversalism subreddit. If you want to see the idea of hell take a beating from a Christian perspective, I highly recommend it.
>
>I'm also currently reading a book by Bart Ehrman called "Heaven and Hell: A History of the Afterlife" which traces the ideas about hell through human history and shows that they developed organically over time, from pagan origins that started out very differently, rather than being some divine revelation.
>I still intensely fear Hell/purgatory
Regarding the fear of hell, I'll post something that I've posted in the past on this issue:
>I got over my fear of eternal inescapable hell by realizing that it contradicts major tenets of traditional Christianity. In other words, even if Christianity were true, hell can't be. It is 100% a manmade idea.
>
>There's a book by David Bentley Hart, "That All Shall Be Saved," where he absolutely eviscerates the idea of eternal inescapable hell on logical grounds, even from a Christian perspective. I've read dozens of reviews of his book by Christians who preach eternal hell, and nearly all but ~two misrepresent his arguments or focus entirely on his tone. His arguments, in my opinion, are simply unassailable - they can't be answered. For this reason, the book is extremely popular in the r/ChristianUniversalism subreddit. If you want to see the idea of hell take a beating from a Christian perspective, I highly recommend it.
I'm also currently reading a book by Bart Ehrman called "Heaven and Hell: A History of the Afterlife" which traces the ideas about hell through human history and shows that they developed organically over time, from pagan origins that started out very differently, rather than being some divine revelation.
I got over my fear of hell by realizing that it contradicts major tenets of traditional Christianity. In other words, even if Christianity were true, hell can't be. It is 100% a manmade idea.
There's a book by David Bentley Hart, "That All Shall Be Saved," where he absolutely eviscerates the idea of eternal inescapable hell on logical grounds. I've read dozens of reviews of his book by Christians who preach eternal hell, and nearly all but ~two misrepresent his arguments or focus entirely on his tone. His arguments, in my opinion, are simply unassailable - they can't be answered. For this reason, the book is extremely popular in the r/ChristianUniversalism subreddit. If you want to see the idea of hell take a beating from a Christian perspective, I highly recommend it.