There is no need to feel bad about that. Sometimes the 'problem area' you focus on can shift with BDD, and sometimes that can mean it's a more serious problem. I would recommend finding a therapist who is well versed in treating BDD with CBT (the most effective treatment). There are also some medications that can help, but CBT is really the best long-term solution. Here is a link to a workbook that was recommended to me by one of my friends who researches BDD. It's really not something to be embarrassed about, and you shouldn't have to suffer every day for something that is treatable. I urge you to see someone soon, because there are specific skills you can learn to reduce it's impact. Often symptoms can just get worse over time if untreated, so now is better than later.
I used this one myself: https://www.amazon.nl/BDD-Workbook-Dysmorphic-Obsessions-Worksheets/dp/1572242930
It worked a little bit, not much but it was better than nothing and its less expensive than therapy while covering the same topics I think
So far I've found a couple things that may be useful:
The BDD Workbook works in a similar spirit to "The OCD Workbook", with information as well as practical exercises that are meant to use on your own. It could be a good and cheap complement to your therapy sessions.
If your husband and immediate family are interested, there are also books targeted at helping them understand the condition and learn how to help both you and themselves. This one in particular seems to have very good reviews.
This small article contains information on specific meds that are used to treat BDD, which you could perhaps discuss with your psychiatrist when the times comes.
And lastly, there's this excerpt from another book with some testimonials you may find informative and relatable.
Unfortunately I looked for BDD forums and you're right that they're more focused on woe, commiseration and enabling than actual treatment tips, which seems to be what tends to happen with this kind of groups unless there is some hard-ass enforcement of rules.