One thing you may be missing is an accurate valuation of the assets and equipment. If you'll be using it going forward, how much life is left and what will it cost to repair/replace.
The sloppy books might be a benefit if they slop in the right direction [grin]. Also see if you can verify accounting with something besides bank records. Maybe sales tax? Maybe purchases of COG supplies.
I would definitely have some contingencies in the money you're paying in the future. Structure it with clawbacks if things are not as they were warranted.
For more than you want to know check out this book by folks whose day job is buying companies like this (but a bit bigger). https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07KXYT8V4/ and a podcast they did by the same name. The podcast might be easier to find just the parts you're needing.
>I’m absolutely not looking for anything that needs to be run hands on as a job,
Then this is not the business for you. At it's simplest, if you're looking at buying in the SMB space, remember that if the current owner is also the operator, and you don't want to do it yourself, you need to pay someone to do it. In most cases, that's going to wipe out any profit the business generates.
If you're serious about buying in the SMB space, I'd highly recommend getting a copy of The Messy Marketplace by Brent Beshore: https://www.amazon.com/Messy-Marketplace-Selling-Business-Imperfect-ebook/dp/B07KXYT8V4
There are all sorts of exits available for DTC businesses. The size of the outcome depends on what your revenue structure, business operations, and future potential look like.
I've had this in my goodreads queue for a while.