Of course! Make sure you give yourself time and space too, if things get too toxic. Being a role model should never come at the expense of sanity.
Consider reading up on Resilience. There's a fair amount of newer research out there on forming support networks and implementing self-care habits to be strong in the face of adversity, and to recover quickly when a blow hits close to home. (I purchased the highly-reviewed Queer & Transgender Resilience Workbook, and there's something to be said for even cis-gendered individuals spending time to truly understand their gender identity, but YMMV).
The thing that helps me most? Knowing that unconstructive criticism says so much more more about them and their insecurities, than it ever does about me. We're the strong ones, pursuing our dreams and leaning into the challenge of life, having experiences most only dream of.
Best of luck, can't wait to see where life takes you. 💖
I dont have much advice, but I sympathize. I cut my hair short back in highschool and hung out with a very butch girl, and enjoyed the ellen DeGeneres show, leading my parents to asking my sister ( not me ) if I was gay. Didnt hear about this till ages after I started dating my bf, but I thought it was kinda funny. Also had teacher ask me in the middle of class if I had anything I wanted to share bc I cut my hair short 🙄. Ironically a year or two later not too long after I started dating my bf I realised I was bi, and I actually find myself more attracted to women. The only advice I have is maybe look at some lgbtq resources and see what they say about explaining/ dealing with people inquiring about your sexuality. This work book has some good info so it might be useful to your situation: https://www.amazon.ca/Queer-Transgender-Resilience-Workbook-Orientation/dp/1626259461
I have absolutely been there in your position, I took on some of the most cruel hyper-masculine behaviors before I could pass in public, in a vain attempt to appear more masculine. I was quite mean to my girlfriend at the time, who was often confused for my little brother. With the help of therapy and being separated from them for over two years now, I have been able to work through these feelings of masculine inadequacy. I’ve had the opportunity to apologize for my behavior and I truly wish someone had been there to tell me that you don’t need to act any other way than your one true self. It truly does not matter what people in public think of you, their opinions are none of your business. Other people do not live inside your head, they do not live your life and therefore their opinions don’t matter.
https://www.amazon.com/Queer-Transgender-Resilience-Workbook-Orientation/dp/1626259461/ref=nodl_
Here’s a link to a workbook that my therapist got specially for me, that we’ve worked through over the past several months- I feel it might be a good tool for you. I wish you all the best.
I've had two therapists in the last two years. Neither of them are gender therapists, but the first one went out of their way to help transfolk. She recommended a book (The Queer and Transgender Resilience Workbook (Skills for Navigating Sexual Orientation and Gender Expression) and it helped me a lot. At the time, I was about 7 years into HRT and went full on into MtF, but I was still struggling a lot with my identity. After 21 pages of the workbook I realized I am genderqueer.
I did further digging later on and found tons of different gender identities on LGBTQ+ wiki sites. All that exploration was overwhelming, but in time I learned that I'm comfortable with GQ and transfeminine. I think that workbook I linked would be a great start for you, or maybe you can find something similar that fits your preference.
As for finding a different therapist, you never know until you try. You are the patient and the goal is to get you the help you need. You can probably go back to your original (ask if concerned) or find another, they'll understand no matter the reason. I got my use out of my first one and decided I needed better care for my mental health. After I switched, suddenly I'm getting bi-weekly appointments and we're working on trauma; lots of it that should've been taken care of years ago. I'm getting all kinds of advice, and it's like a whole new world of therapy that I thought my provider just didn't give its patients. Wouldn't have gotten that if I didn't get out of my comfort zone and keep looking.
Being afraid of HRT, feelings of imposter syndrome, confusing dysphoria, etc is all normal. A lot of us feel rushed because HRT can be a time sensitive thing depending on age, but it is a serious decision and unfortunately it does take time to know these things. When I started having thoughts about my gender identity, I spent a lot of time doing research, looking at timeline pictures/videos, thinking, talking to others, etc, and eventually decided to give it a shot. Worse comes to worst, I tried it for a few weeks and didn't like it, right? Personally, I ended up sticking with it and it's been 8 years. I wont lie, I've had a lot of moments where I felt like an imposter or maybe I was making a mistake. For me that was the dysphoria and feeling like I wasn't valid enough, etc. Discovering my true identity has really helped with that.
I hope this helped. Good luck on your journey!
Hey nothing wrong with being bisexual, and it doesnt have to mean anything for you other than you sometimes find guys sexy too. Theres a lot of negative stereotypes of bisexual people out there, like we only ever want to have threesomes or that we're more likely to cheat because of our broader range or attraction, and that's all bullshit. You can be bisexual and happily be in a monogamous realationship with someone (same sex or opposite) and may only experience attractions to one gender or the other for a majority of the time and or only seek realationships with one and those are all completely valid ways of experiencing bisexuality. My experince: I'm in a seemingly straight realationship, but both we're both bisexual. I've never dated a girl before, but I still find women very attractive, I would say my ratio is like 80% gay and 20% straight, because I'm much more picky and most guys dont dress in the same sexualized way that women tend to (when they do it's hot af tho). My partner and I have always been monogamous and while part of me would like to see what it's like to be with a girl I value my realationship more than my curiosity; the same way I think anyone should feel if they want a monogamous realationship no matter their sexuality. My partner and I our both really open and comfortable with talking about people we see who we think are hot, which works fine for us but I think some people would not be comfortable with that. Bisexuality for me is kind of a part of my identity because theres still all these misconceptions- both from straight people and the lgbtq community, and because my realationship looks very hetero I feel like people forget or dont understand and i sometimes feel kinda stuck because of the heteronormative expectations/ view points that other people have. I believe the sub r/bisexualmen exists, and might be helpful for you, and may have some resources to help you feel comfortable and confident in your sexuality. There is also a really good work book which might help you sort out your feelings.
Pdf that might just be viruses: https://www.e-bookdownload.net/search/the-queer-and-transgender-resilience-workbook
Same Book for money: https://www.amazon.com/Queer-Transgender-Resilience-Workbook-Orientation/dp/1626259461
Second book on Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Gender-Quest-Workbook-Exploring-Identity/dp/1626252971