What is Reddit's opinion of The Wiser Divorce: Positive Strategies for Your Next Best Life?

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One the time has passed in your state he can be granted a divorce whether you cooperate or not. How do you think he and a judge are going to react when you're making it hard? The minute the divorce is final you're going to be dropped. However if you cooperate and are cordial you may get him to agree to keeping you on the insurance for a longer time. Or get the agreement to get him to pay for your insurance for some additional time.

You're only hurting yourself by being obstinate. The divorce WILL happen regardless of your cooperation and/or feeling about it. You should grow up and work it out so that you get the best results possible for yourself and your kids.

I'd suggest you obtain a copy of this book: The Wiser Divorce - Positive strategies for your next best life

The writer is a very smart divorce attorney and she talks a lot about how you go about divorcing in the best and kindest way for all involved. It will change your point of view.

I don't get why you'd want to remain married. What's the point - there seems to be no support or love or concern on his part towards you.

Is there some other reason you didn't mention why you wouldn't want a divorce? Was he like this during your "10 year best friendship"?

As /u/Justkeepbreathing123 says if someone wants a divorce you can't stop it. You can only make it heart breaking, expensive and destructive but you can't stop it. Every state has procedures for filing for divorce without the consent of their spouse.

I'd suggest you read this book - The Wiser Divorce. It's an excellent book from a divorce and family lawyer showing how you can come out of divorce with a positive plan for the rest of your life and how making it difficult is just a plan for destroying your own life.

I agree. I don't think people have any expectation of how much more it will cost them to settle in court (lawyers fees) and what a chance they take that the judge will laugh at them.

This point is very clear in a book I often recommend called The Wiser Divorce: Positive Strategies for Your Next Best Life written by a family and divorce lawyer.

Unless there are hundreds of thousand of dollars at stake, your increased costs are often more than the cost of the asset. And your goal of coming out of a divorce as better, kinder person is going to be shattered in the adversarial nature of divorce via courts.

Interesting. Here in PA we have Collaborative Divorce (one step up from mediation) where the divorcing parties and their collaborative lawyers meet and agree to have an mutual agreement as to divorce without any court. Part of the agreement is that no information disclosed in the collaboration can be used if the agreement is not met which really encourages people from breaking the collaboration since you'd have to start over with more lawyers.

When I tell my wife we're going to divorce I'm really hoping she'll be rational enough to go through with this. We have no kids and I'm planning on a fair division of assets so maybe.

If you think this might work for you I'd suggest you read this book - The Wiser Divorce: Positive Strategies for Your Next Best Life. It's written by a family lawyer in AZ who really pushes the idea that you need to separate your emotions from the business of divorce and do what's fair and right without a lot of cost or legal machinery. It's a good read.