I hate referencing amazon, but this is probably all you need. $20 and it might save your life. link: jack stands
Get some car jack stands under the server, then undo the cage nuts. Easy extract, and you get bonus jack stands when you're done.
Every jack stand rating I've seen is for a pair. Here's my Craftsman 2 1/4 ton stands, for example(look in the warning section). Some Harbor Freight stands. These stands on Amazon also specifically state their rating is for the pair.
Yeah - I apologize as I always have a difficult time explaining mechanics when I'm writing. Essentially it is what this guy is talking about at 2:42 - https://youtu.be/MvA4eYmj_vE?t=2m42s
All I currently have are these more shallow stands: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0028JQYPG/ref=ox_sc_act_title_1?smid=ATVPDKIKX0DER&psc=1
And am wondering if it is overkill to go out and buy stands with deeper grooves to cross the pinch weld: https://www.harborfreight.com/3-ton-steel-jack-stands-62392.html
Holy shit get some jack stands, what is wrong with your husband?