Therapy. Finding other things to occupy my hands when I'm watching TV (cross stitch, knitting). Enjoying other things where I can have lots to choose from (makeup, skincare). Keeping to as strict a sleep schedule as possible because my bingeing happens mostly at night. Getting enough calories and hydration throughout the day.
I was in a group therapy that used the book Women Food and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything by Geneen Roth and I found it enlightening. I'm not a religious person at all. The book has a spiritual component but it wasn't a turn-off for me. Highly recommend.
I totally get this struggle, and the feeling of shame that comes with it.
Besides therapy, books by Geneen Roth have been tremendously helpful for me. I started with Women, Food, and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything. I'll note that I'm not a religious person at all, and the book isn't really religious, but does have a spiritual component. It's about the author's struggle with Binge Eating Disorder, and her process of overcoming it.
I actually was in a therapy group that used the book as a discussion starter, kind of like a therapeutic book club. The book was really eye-opening for me. I'm not "cured" but I've genuinely been able to get a handle on a lot of my thinking patterns and behaviors.
You're not alone.
The book Women, Food, and God: An Unexpected Path to Almost Everything was really eye-opening. I should clarify that it's not really about God or religion. I'm an atheist and I still very much related to it.
One of the things that helps me is having something to do with my hands -- knitting, cross stitch) while watching TV.
I am certainly no expert on spells, but it seems unlikely that your spell in that moment is the causal agent at play here. I know PCOS definitely affects weight, so I would try to not be too hard.on yourself. I do recommend Women, Food and God by Geneen Roth though. This book is about the relationship you have with your body and food and how the words you hear growing up, especially from our mothers, morph into really harmful perspectives when we're criticized about our bodies and food. It sounds like this is something you could relate to and might be helpful. https://www.amazon.com/Women-Food-God-Unexpected-Everything/dp/1416543082
There's a ton of books, blogs, & podcasts that deal with emotional eating. You may not like them all but here are some recommendations:
Food Psych -- podcast
Fearless Rebel Radio -- podcast
Isabel Foxen Duke -- blog, plus she's been interviewed by so many podcasts and she is incredibly insightful imo
Women, Food & God by Geneen Roth -- she has many other books but this is the only one I've read
Finally, while you are still in this low place, I would recommend filling up on foods that are high volume/low calorie so you don't find yourself quite as hungry for foods that are low volume/high calorie. Snack on carrots, broccoli, bell peppers, etc. before you tackle the oreos, ice cream. But by all means don't deny yourself the food, just eat some carrots first and if you still want ice cream after, have at it.
This is not an issue about weight loss ultimately. You need to deal with the interplay of food & emotions first. Weight loss can come after that.
> Back to my original question, what is wrong with desires?
It halts action. That can be a problem since your OP stated "I desire to stop watching porn."
Your desire to stop is getting in the way of you stopping. Act, don't intellectualize.
>So if you know the cure to weightloss, why don't you write a book and make a billion dollars.
Because plus sized women are my fetish.
And, it has already been done. Twice. Thrice? A thousand years ago?
>It would still take him effort to lose the weight.
'Time' does not equal 'effort'. The radical detachment from mental cravings is instantaneous.
It's a shifting of perspective, from 'food as an intoxicant' to 'food as nourishment'.
The new perspective is the breaking of the buried seed; the weight loss is the growth of the tree.
First recognize who you are, what you are, what food is. After recognizing, let weight loss happen.
If you don't trust that weight loss will happen by itself, then you have recognized nothing at all.
Good--I really think that this is a matter of finding the underlying causes of your emotional eating, not just overcoming it through sheer willpower. You might also check out the book Women, Food and God.