This looks like the handwriting of many of my former 8th grade female students. I would knock off points (even in 8th grade) for capitalization errors and I would extend the tall lines in the tall letters (like l, d, b, k, etc) with my red pen. Your handwriting is pleasant and legible, but I would suggest you do some practice writing on that old-fashioned writing paper with the dotted line down the middle of each writing line. I think you would benefit from adding a little maturity to your style. Bravo on putting yourself out there and looking to improve! (Can I link a product here? https://www.amazon.com/WRITING-PAPER-upper-lower-letters/dp/B0848QBV6P)