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After some more research it looks like this is a behavioral feeding aversion. I just started reading this book and already resonate with a lot. Hopefully it helps you too if you haven’t already discovered it. https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2/ref=nodl_?dplnkId=1215211a-2b70-4a57-ac02-db19515760ef
Different problem here but someone recommended to me the book Your Baby's Bottle-Feeding Aversion by Rowena Bennett and I think you might find it helpful. It does recommend cold-turkey and it also has specific advice to make that more likely to work!
This sounds a lot like a bottle/feeding aversion. Trying to gently force or trick your baby into taking the bottle will only backfire. My own daughter when through this after getting out of the NICU.
I highly recommend you check out Rowena Bennett’s book on feeding aversion (there’s a great Facebook group for parents dealing with this too). She lays out a very specific plan and actions to overcome it. I’m happy to answer any questions you have.
My little one has a g tube. Bottle aversion was definitely at play there at least partially. One book the helper tremendously was this book: https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2/ref=nodl_
It made a night and day difference in my baby.
Look up feeding aversions and bottle aversions. I also recommend reading this book.
Generally, a feeding aversion occurs when a baby feels pressured to eat. It starts because they eat a little less and the parents begin pressuring the baby to eat more, which stresses the baby out and makes them eat less. It’s a difficult situation with a very “easy” solution—backing off. It honestly doesn’t sound that bad at this point, so going with a very gentle, baby-led feeding approach could resolve a lot of these aversion issues in a matter of days. It took us about 72 hours to get our baby to stop flipping out at the sight of a bottle and about a week to get back to eating full volume.
The amount she eats is still a huge stressor for me, personally, but she eats when she’s hungry and is gaining weight appropriately, so no one is worried about it but me at this point.
Sorry that you're going through this, feeding refusal is incredibly difficult to go through, so sending solidarity and hugs. You may find this book helpful, it saved us.
Best of luck.
It absolutely sounds like he has a bottle aversion and feels pressured to eat solids and so is resisting for that reason. Please read this book it will tell you everything you need to know to address this. Best of luck.
You should look into bottle aversions. Sometimes there are medical reasons for it (though seems unlikely that he would randomly develop reflux at 16 weeks), but typically it’s because the baby is being pressured to eat more than they want, so they start refusing the bottle.
The baby pushing the bottle away or pulling away and crying is a common sign. If you have to cajole, distract, or feed the baby in increasingly weird places, it’s a sign of aversion.
I found this book to be pretty helpful and we resolved our aversion issues in about 72 hours.
She got back to eating full volume in a week and it takes her about 10 minutes to finish a bottle. Sometimes she only takes 2oz and sometimes she takes 4, but she’s gaining weight and growing, so she’s fine.
It could be that he didn’t want to eat as much when sick, but you were accidentally pressuring him to eat the normal amount and now he is pushing back. The good news is that if it started recently, it can probably be resolved very quickly if you take a low-pressure, baby-led feeding approach.
I found this book to be very helpful. https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2/
Obviously, it’s not exactly your situation, but you might find the descriptions of behaviors (both yours and the baby’s) useful. You also might be able to implement some of the solutions.
You can pump to keep up your supply (perhaps he will take a bottle eventually), and in the meantime, even if takes less for a couple days, he will be okay and eventually start eating better. It took us about 3-4 days to ramp up in volume. It feels like torture to you at the time (not to baby! Baby is happy to relax a bit), but in the grand scheme of things, a few days isn’t very long to sort out a problem that has this big an impact on you and your baby.
Our kid had feeding aversions around that age. It was so scary and frustrating and I felt like no one took us seriously. It turned out to be a milk protein allergy but figuring that out didn’t really fix it. He’s a happy and healthy four year old now. The other day I was looking for something else online and noticed this book which I wish I’d had back then: https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=6Q5UYAB92WB4&dchild=1&keywords=feeding+aversion&qid=1635338681&sprefix=feeding+aversion%2Caps%2C79&sr=8-3
It sounds like she is developing a bottle aversion, most likely due to being pressured to eat. I would read this book immediately so the situation doesn’t get worse.
This situation isn’t that uncommon, but the sooner you sort things out, the better, because it will only get worse if you continue to pressure her.
Hi! I just wanted to recommend Rowena Bennett’s book on bottle feeding aversion. It’s an interesting read even if your baby doesn’t have it. My daughter is also 4 months old and has been refusing to eat randomly every other day, so I found the book while googling for solutions. We’re doing the program right now, it seems to be working, but we’re only on day 3 so it’s still a bit back and forth.
Anyways, if you’re interested, here’s the amazon link, the comments are overwhelmingly positive
Distraction is a really common issue at 3 months.
I haven't personally read this book, but I've seen others highly recommend it regarding bottle refusal: https://www.amazon.ca/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2
This sounds a little like what my baby went through at 3 months old- a bottle aversion. The main sign for us was that he’d only eat when really tired (right before a nap or in the middle of the night). This website has a bullet list of some of the signs of bottle aversion https://mamamadefood.com/blogs/mamamadeblog/bottle-aversion-why-does-my-baby-refuse-to-be-bottle-fed
However, at that age he wasn’t eating any solids so I’m not sure what the strategy is for fixing it in an older baby (or whether you bother, since they can eat solids).
We had to read a book and follow the strategies in it (https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2). It took about 4 days to see improvement and then it gradually got better until he was drinking 25% more by 2 weeks (800ml to over 1000 a day)
If you wanna drop a few bucks and get the full plan that I was recommended, https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2
You may want to try this book https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2 its DOR for bottle feeding.
Hello, I am sorry you're going through this. Just to give you some alternative information, it might be worth considering whether your baby has developed a feeding aversion rather than is suffering from reflux. A telltale sign would be if she feeds well while asleep (dreamfeeding) or overnight. Reflux, if she has it, would cause pain at all feeds and not just some. Feeding aversions are almost always misdiagnosed as reflux and are extremely poorly understood by most medical professionals unfortunately.
I bring this up because you mention that you're not happy with how much she's eating and the key cause of feeding aversions is applying pressure, intentionally or unintentionally, to feeds. You are also exactly at the same time in your journey that I was with my LO when he developed a feeding aversion, which is around the time that your milk supply regulates and your LO will typically start to fuss more at the breast because milk becomes less available and they need to work harder for it. This is often mistaken for fussiness because your milk supply has decreased but actually it's just the baby being grumpy that they have to do more work than they're used to, and it will pass with time and by not applying any pressure whatsoever to feeds.
For more info on feeding aversions please have a look at this article, it should help you better understand if that's what you're dealing with. If you think it is, this book provides a step-by-step guide to overcoming a feeding aversion. It's aimed at bottle fed babies but it's advice applies to BF babies as well.
I really encourage you to read the above article because it will give you a clear idea whether or not this is what you're dealing with. Please feel free to message me if you have any questions and good luck with your journey ahead!
So sorry you're going through this. It sounds like a feeding aversion.
Please read this article to understand more about feeding aversions.
Then this book can provide in-depth advice to understand how to overcome it. The key thing, and I cannot overstate this, is to remove any and all pressure that you might be applying to feeds. This will mean that you will offer the bottle of breast and if baby doesn't willingly come to it, then you will put it away and try again later. You can retry offering in 5-10 minutes but only once. Some babies hate the second offer so if she consistently refuses it just stop at one. Gradually she will come back to feeding happily and begin to enjoy feeds again.
Know that you have some tough days ahead of you but there is a light at the end of this tunnel. And think of it from this perspective if it helps.. your little one is in control of so few things in the world at the moment, and the one thing she can control is when to eat. Let her have that autonomy over her own body and decide when and if she is full, and you will lay the foundations for a healthy relationship with food for decades to come.
Happy to chat more if you have any questions. Good luck and I hope things turn around for you and your little really quickly.
Sorry you're going through this.
This article should help and this book provides a strategy to overcome the aversion.
I hope things improve for you quickly.
So sorry you're going through this. It is just awful, but there is plenty that you can do to get past this.
Please read this article to understand more about BF aversion.
You might also benefit from reading about the three month breastfeeding crisis here
Then this book can provide in-depth advice to understand how to overcome it. The key thing, and I cannot overstate this, is to remove any and all pressure that you might be applying to feeds. This will mean that you will offer the breast and if baby doesn't willingly come to it, then you will put it away and try again later. You can retry offering in 5-10 minutes but only once. Some babies hate the second offer so if she consistently refuses it just stop at one. Gradually she will come back to the breast and begin to enjoy feeds again.
Trust me I know what you are saying. My daughter has struggled to eat her entire life so I am coming from an informed place. Now that she is 21 months she clearly expresses when I've crossed a line, and with repeatedly offering food, she does get visibly upset. So yes, I think there is an element of force there.
There's an entire technique to spoon feeding without force. You hold the spoon in front of their mouths, and wait for them to open their mouth. It's an art form. This book was really helpful to us for understanding how to respect the limits of a baby that does not have the ability to express themselves yet. https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2
Distraction food is an interesting idea I haven't considered. Experts recommended to us that we offer a "safe food" at each meal, which sounds similar to what you are recommending. But if you're using the distraction food to trick them into opening their mouths and then jamming a spoonful of puree in, that definitely crosses the line.
Here : Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion: Reasons and Solutions. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B076PWRHH2/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_GFV8165NAJV1707XG6M2
Is it possible she's developed a nursing aversion? This book on bottle-feeding aversion (same-same but different) has completely saved our breastfeeding relationship. This articleis how I found out about it and realised Oliver had developed an aversion after his four month shots, and now I'm on a mission to share this info with anyone who's struggling to get their LO to nurse or take a bottle. I hope things get better for you guys soon, aversion or no.
We're going through this as well but without the bottles at daycare (LO is still at home with me at 4.5 months and EBF). I've just found out what's happening for us is a breastfeeding aversion but apparently a bottle preference can look the same. Ours started just after his four month shots and I think it's because I was pressuring (encouraging) him to eat when his appetite was super low, and now he feels stressed at the breast and was only feeding well immediately before and after naps when he was tired and his guard was low. Even then, he would still come off the breast while feeding and be really unsettled, and cry after eating. He would also almost always eat for just about the exact same amount of time, six minutes, which is a telltale sign of an aversion apparently.
I didn't know what was happening until I came across this article and this book both by the same author. Feeding aversions are apparently frequently misdiagnosed as reflux, low supply, or CMPA, and lead BFing parents to end their BFing journey prematurely and switch to bottle feeding.
We are three days into implementing the methods set out by the above linked book and we're seeing improvements although it has been super stressful, because anytime LO breaks away during a feed we end the feed and he's obviously hungry. But I'm feeling like there's a light at the end of the tunnel and the book has really helped me to understand why this happened in the first place, and how to approach my LO to make sure it doesn't happen again and that we can continue our BFing journey until he is ready to wean.
Wishing you the best of luck, I know how incredibly stressful aversive behaviour is. Hang in there and trust your LO.
Hi! I had this problem too: I read this book and it really helped. Your Baby’s Bottle-feeding Aversion: Reasons and Solutions. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B076PWRHH2/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_0C33056E69CZQJ9K4CPJ?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1 Good luck!
Hi--i haven't gone through other comments, but i've been through a similar struggle. Have you looked into undiagnosed tongue/lip ties? There'a great facebook group (tongue ties baby support). Pediatricians/ENTs aren't super knowledgeable so you'd have to find a "preferred provider."
Our baby cried with every bottle. We thought she had reflux and put her on meds and they did nothing. we got the ties revised (super quick procedure). she hasn't cried eating since and reflux symptoms are gone (symptoms before were gassiness, agitation eating, coughing, clicking sounds eating, gulping, bad latch, reflux symptoms).
the other thing to look at could be a feeding aversion? we put our baby on a schedule and inadvertently force fed her. so if you think it could be behavioral, maybe look into this. https://www.amazon.com/Your-Babys-Bottle-feeding-Aversion-Solutions-ebook/dp/B076PWRHH2
Could be a long shot, but might be worth checking out.