I purchased a Thrustmaster 16000m with a throttle. It's arriving in the mail today. It was on sale at Amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Thrustmaster-T-16000M-FCS-HOTAS-Controller/dp/B01KCHPRXA I was using a controller and I think that was just getting me killed.
I often forget to change the pips from weapons when I don't have the enemy in front of me. I spend a lot of time spinning and looking for my target. All the while, I'm getting shot to bits. There's definitely a learning curve.