Make a 3D animated movie and let the characters say their lines. The site Xtranormal used to be good for this but it's not around anymore. Muvizu is good and has a free trial.
The easiest & fastest way to tell stories with animation. Muvizu is an interactive 3D animation package. The software includes everything you will need to tell your animated story and share it with your friends. Drag and drop customizable characters and sets, animation libraries and automatic lip-synching makes it easy to create compelling animations in minutes.
Sounds like you're suffering from attention deficit disorder and depression. See a therapist and psychologist, medication could help.
In the meantime, have you tried Muvizu Play?
Might not get anywhere, but it should be a lot of fun for someone who's pursued programming, 3D modeling, and wants to make films.
It combines pretty much them all. Based on the unreal game engine.
I could go on for quite some time about it's features, read the website for yourself though. Free and (cheap, about $35 last I knew) paid version.
Tire for mum on way to clinic, or flips off bus poles? I won't assume you have time to talk about Cthulhu.
Give it a shot.
Might be something you look forward to spending spare time on, even if you never make a cent from it.