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Oh God damn man. I'm so sorry. That is fucking tragic. I'm sorry you have to experience this op. Truly.

The girl I loved died a few years back. I wish I had good advice for you, but honestly I haven't handled it well at all so I really have no business doing that. Just want you to know you're not alone and it slowly gets a little better/easier. You're lucky you have your son. He'll help keep you together because you'll need to be. Hold him tight and cherish every moment.

Actually I do have a piece of advice. Please don't let this pain harden you. Harden your heart. Instead let it do the opposite. It might be harder in the short term but it'll save you so pain later on. Not to mention increase your capacity to love and care for your child.

Here's two books that that touch on that idea and really helped me, both by the same author, Pema Chodron, and I highly recommend them. They are both buddhist oriented books and concepts, but put forth in a very universally acceptable way. But that said, the rest of the core concepts of Buddhism itself have also helped me tremendously.

When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times https://www.amazon.com/When-Things-Fall-Apart-Difficult/dp/1611803438

The Places That Scare You: A Guide to Fearlessness in Difficult Times https://www.amazon.com/Places-That-Scare-You-Fearlessness/dp/1611805961/ref=pd_aw_sim_14_1?_encoding=UTF8&pd_rd_i=1611805961&pd_rd_r=1379392c-22e4-11e9-8739-9941e184f583&pd_rd_w=MOlQB&pd_rd_wg=vHSaZ&pf_rd_p=469620d9-3e90-496d-9...

I wish you nothing but the best op. Sending love to you brother. Stay strong. You're not alone.

Sorry for hijacking the thread. https://www.tiktok.com/@bridget050/video/6814437427537628422?u_code=d6f1eel2lbcfk9&preview_pb=0&language=en&_d=cm07je7400jbmi&timestamp=1586706850&user_id=6698320409072976902&utm_campaign=client_share&app=musically&utm_medium=ios&user_id=6698320409072976902&tt_from=facebook&utm_source=facebook&source=h5_m

Book is call Barney the Boring Barumbus. Available on Amazon Barney the Boring Barumbus (The Barumbus Collection) https://www.amazon.com/dp/1704384214/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_63N7VY0D5QN6CGX60K6W

It takes effort and putting a healthy relationship with your son above everything else. It takes realising that punishments and negative parenting don't work in the long run, for anyone. Check out this book. You got this ☺️