What are /r/polyfamilies' favorite Products & Services?

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https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B004MPRDQS/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

That book has helped me a lot. By using present mind awareness techniques I was able to learn to sit with my anxiety, fear and discomfort. Over time I was able to unravel those feeling and get to their root. When you see things at their root they’re a lot less scary. It also allows you to process what’s real - not some story your well meaning mind has offered you.

Hope that helps!

No matter who you go with, I always recommend asking your therapist/coach/counselor if they’ve read this book. It’s been helpful in our journey through Polyam

A Therapist’s Guide to Consensual Nonmonogamy: Polyamory, Swinging, and Open Marriage

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1138207462/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_a_BVAKAX1AY1K26RARJYEH

The following book might be helpful in improving communication and clarifying everyone's feelings and needs:

<strong>Eight Dates</strong>

Though aimed at monogamous couples, basically 99% of it is applicable to any relationship. It's based on a tonne of research into healthy couples and how they interact. Either one on one or (in some cases) three-way may make sense.

(I can get you a pirated ebook version if you like, but it's totally worth getting the physical one IMO, and supporting the authors.)

Failing that, relationship therapy with an understanding therapist might be helpful. Services like Better Help could provide this online through video conference. They have a variety of therapists.

The book is really excellent though 🙂

I really hope this helps! Wishing you all the best. ❤️

Personally, I would want to exhaust all chances for improvement before considering breaking up.

Perhaps you and your partners would consider (each) getting the following book. If it's possible for you all to reconnect, I have a feeling it may help you figure that out and do so.

<strong>Eight Dates</strong>

Though aimed at monogamous couples, honestly it's 99% applicable to any relationship. I imagine one on one is best, but possibly (in some cases) three-way may make sense.

(I can get you a pirated ebook version if you like, but it's totally worth getting the physical one IMO, and supporting the authors.)

In the end, a big part of the success or failure of your relationship depends on the conversations you have with each other. We sent over three hundred couples on the dates in this book. They did the exercises, recorded their conversations, and shared their stories. New couples, celibate couples, same-sex couples, and long-term married couples all found that these conversations brought them closer and helped them see each other in new and exciting ways. They became better friends, and they fell in love all over again. You can, too.

Failing that, I would say relationship therapy from an understanding therapist would be next. Services like Better Help could provide this online through video conference. They have a variety of therapists.

The book is really excellent though 🙂

I really hope this helps! Wishing you all the best. ❤️

So that might be just the preference for your husband, you are allowed to have your own preference and should voice them. I personally donl not prefer one traditional gender over the other, but with me identifying as demisexual so I tend to gravitate towards relationships based on their personalities and individual connections not gender identities. However, I was not raised that open-minded nor broad-minded, definitely raised by bias people who barely understood themselves let alone other people's individualities and had to unlearn and rediscover my core self.

These are the books that helped me transition to the poly lifestyle that I always knew I wanted to be a part of and to unlearn my cis and close-minded upbringing so I could have the freedom to be who I always knew myself to be inside. These books really helped me and I believe that they will answer your question as well as future questions you might have. I'm sending Amazon links because it's easier.

https://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/d/0996460187?psc=1&amp;ref=ppx_pop_mob_b_asin_title

https://www.amazon.com/Ethical-Slut-Third-Practical-Relationships/dp/0399579664

Side note, has been told to me by others that these titlesThe titles are a little off-putting to some people who little knowledge of the poly lifestyle / choice. But they've been a tremendous help in my life dealing with partners that are exploring to see if they will enjoy poly and to people who are already part of the lifestyle as well as everyone in between.

Tools to assist with the communication and dealing with the fun world of emotions

The Polyamory Toolkit: A Guidebook for Polyamorous Relationship

My husband and I have been talking about how the fact that we are poly opens doors to us regarding family and children that monogamous couples don't have.

He wants to be a father, and I don't want to be a mother. (I'd love to be something closer to an "auntie" or "stepmom" where I can be a supportive parental figure, but not the primary parent.) We both want "family" in the sense of other people in our romantic and family life. I don't want to deny him an opportunity to be a father. And, we both love each other and want to stay together.

With polyamory, disagreements about having kids doesn't need to necessarily end the relationship. It's possible that you could become a mother to children through another partner, and share custody with that partner. Or, you could someday have the bio-father partner move in with the two of you and create a blended family where your husband is more like an "uncle" or "stepdad" or maybe even less involved than that.

You get to decide what works for you and polyamory lets you potentially find very creative ways to be fullfilled in your life and relationships beyond what the normative society says is okay.

My therapist recommended my husband and I start reading two books:

https://www.amazon.com/Polyamorists-Next-Door-Multiple-Partner-Relationships/dp/144225310X/

and

https://www.amazon.com/Stories-Polycule-Real-Polyamorous-Families/dp/0991399773/

It seems like Elisabeth Sheff is sort of the go-to person regarding poly and families. Maybe these books might help you start new kinds of conversations with your husband and explore whether or not going in this direction could make you both happy, while still affirming and strengthening your marriage.