As I know, some commerical keyloggers are free from malware and they can not be detected.
Maybe you can try some simple way to check unfamiliar programs on your computer. Do the following: Type CTRL + ALT + DELETE, it will open your Task Manager, Processes tab look for BKP. exe or AKL. exe, if you find the BKP. AKL exe or. exe's why you have keylogger. * Remembering that if you can not always detect Keylogger by CTRL + ALT + DELETE. For those who have a little more technical knowledge, it also noted the hint of how good the performance of the processor. If it is working continuously even if the computer does not have many applications running is a sign that the machine can produce something suspicious.
Why did she do that? Is she your ex girlfriend? You said that she hacked into your computer, so she has the chance to install a Mac keylogger for your Mac. Though your passwords seem secure, but the keylogger can record your passwords. Have a talk with her. Tell her it's not fun.
I guess you have a hard time now. If you want to keep the marriage, you should have a talk with her and tell her your feelings, and you two need to find a solution to deal with issues. If you want to divorce, you can save the chat logs as evidence. As I know, the keylogger records chat conversations, and the logs can be used as evidence against her.
Keyloggers for Mac are out there. I did Google and got a lot. Amac Keylogger Keylogger Mac LogKext (free)