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At one point I could only do one. I then found that I could do two, and then I would crash and burn out.
I would then get myself up, and try again. One...then two...maybe three.
Repeat the crash and burn cycle hundreds of times over the last 10 years (since I got diagnosed and started treatment).
Now, I can keep up with a few areas of my life. Sometimes I still crash, but all the times I'd fallen before have taught me a little something, so the crashes don't last as long.
I didn't know it, but each time I fell and got back up, I got a little wiser.
Self-compassion was the key to allowing me to see just how far I'd come, and how far I can go if I just keep trying while being kind to myself. I first started practicing it last year and it changed my life.
Again, I don't have it all figured out, but I'd like to let others know that progress doesn't always look so obvious, and it is definitely possible to outgrow old patterns.
Me too, til I got one of these https://www.amazon.co.uk/Satisfyer-Pro-2-Clitorial-Toy/dp/B071CPR2V4/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?qid=1665349221&refinements=p_89%3ASatisfyer&s=drugstore&sr=1-1
It is a magical instrument of rapid orgasm and joy. I suggest you put a towel down.
My tips are:
Get an e-reader app on your phone that can go extreeeeemely low brightness (below what the system lets you set with a slider) and have dark modes, e.g. ReadEra or PocketBook. I fall asleep while reading with these.
I have identified the kinds of content that 'slows down' my brain. Some books (obviously, from the above), but text-only subreddits are also quite helpful. Not only because you aren't moving rapidly from one thing to the next, but also just because you can keep your phone's light output very low (if you are using a dark mode app).
Use warm and dim lighting for a while before bed. Smart globes aren't cheap but I find them invaluable. Also, use warm/dim lighting settings on your phone and/or computer.
Cease eating at least a couple of hours before you want to go to sleep.
Do some kind of exercise during the day. Podcasts are your friend when it comes to not getting bored while walking, while also not walking in front of bus.
Use a high-quality magnesium supplement (e.g. chelate, glycinate). This is especially helpful if you use stimulant medication.
This one turns out to not be that size, but others are
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Hey, fellow Keepass user! I use a program called Syncthing to take care of syncing across devices. It runs on my PC and my Android phone and syncs files (including my password file) between them. It's all done encrypted and peer-to-peer over your local WiFi network so you're not sending your files to a cloud provider.
Things that help
Magnesium glycinate. Both magnesium and glycinate help sleep.
Melatonin. Don’t take those 5-10mg ones, while not harmful, it way too much and there’s such a spike that the drop in levels during the night can trigger you to wake up in the night and not be able to get back asleep. Melatonin isn’t a hammer to knock yourself to sleep with. It should be seen as a subtle tool to improve sleep quality. You want doses of 0.3mg (300 mcg). Take a normal one consistently at 8-9PM, and then a delayed release one when you go to bed.
L-theanine is another fantastic and safe calming agent. It may lose some effectiveness when taken consecutively over time. It’s also great to pair with caffeine in the morning (you shouldn’t have caffeine after noon). FYI, Dark chocolate has significant caffeine if you weren’t aware. Even if caffeine makes you drowsy, it is still probably screwing with sleep quality, so dark chocolate and tea are best avoided.
Make sure your room has clean air (HEPA air filter meant for mold/allergens) and enough humidity (especially now that it’s winter and your heating system may not have a humidifier). Use the evaporative kind with a fan and wick. Steam based one make a lot of heat, eat electricity, are loud and need constant hard water scale cleaning. Ultrasonic ones also need constant cleaning because they quickly breed bacteria and throw them everywhere, along with the minerals in the water. Mine ends up putting 1-1.5 gallons of water in the air every day, and my sinuses no longer dry out.
If you are really desperate I find a full dose of aspirin helps. For one off fixes it’s fine, but consecutive use will mess up your stomach and also seems to cause a subtle dependence. One advantage is it doesn’t cause and residual drowsiness if you need to get up in a few ours.
Don’t eat too close to bed.
Get rid of or block all those shitty LEDs, block street lights.
If you're a reader, check out this book some time:
It's horribly accurate for people like us who grow up "bright" & then have no tools or coping skills for when things get hard in college & in our careers lol.
I can’t say if this is the cheapest, but it’s the first one I found
I would think, especially if you're saying the meds also make you antsy! I've seen other people suggest L-Theanine and B vitamins (which I also take) frequently as well. Here is the one commonly recommended by people. I hope it helps!
I recently picked up Driven to Distraction.
It's a famous "living with adhd" book and while I'm too ADHD to have read much of it yet, the foreword specifically addresses the wrong perception of ADHD among most people, and illustrates it with excellent anonymised patient stories. If you have ADHD you'll see yourself in this book loads, and if you need someone to understand what it's like to live as you it's perfect.
I suspect our respective parents were around when that basic inaccurate knowledge about ADHD was all that was generally known. We get trained more now in med school but we also know more now about how ADHD works and what it's like to live with it.