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My mom is on her second neurologist (due to moving) and both have been good. They ordered the testing that was needed (MRI and others) and other support services (in her case physical and speech therapy).
Maybe the one your LO has just isn't a good fit? They mostly deal with medial issues concerning the brain. More practical advice concerning behavior might better come from a psychologist. Actually my own therapist has been great giving me some practical advice. I started therapy a few months ago to help me deal with my mom's dementia.
Also, you don't have to go to a doctor to test for a UTI, you can buy the test strips yourself on Amazon:
If your LO tests positive then maybe you could call primary care and have an antibiotic called in to the pharmacy? Just wondering if that would make things easier.
Also, I understand needing to rant. I feel like ranting on a daily basis. Dementia sucks, and I'm sorry you are going through this. Try to remember to also take care of you.
I saw a course from Johns Hopkins University on coursera (free) that might be useful. I haven't watched the lectures but from their outline it looks like you might want to just start at week 3.
"Living with Dementia: Impact on Individuals, Caregivers, Communities and Societies" -by Nancy Hodgson, PhD, RN, Laura Gitlin, PhD
https://www.coursera.org/course/dementiacare
WEEK I: The Brain
Framework of Dementia
Global impact of dementia
History of Alzheimer’s Disease and Related Dementias
Pathophysiology of Dementia
The New Trajectory of Dementia
The Challenge of Diagnosis
WEEK 2: The Person
Personhood of Individuals with Dementia
Unmet Needs
Unmet Needs: Continuum of Needs of Persons with Dementia and Potential Interventions
Behaviors, Trajectory and Change Over Time of Dementia
Assessing the Role of the Home and Community Environment in Supporting Families Living with Dementia
Activity for Persons with Dementia
Palliative Care
Pharmacological Treatment Options
WEEK 3: The Caregiving and the Home Environment
Family Unmet Needs
Psychosocial Processes
Environmental Model
The Role of Technology in Dementia Care
WEEK 4: The Community Level
Dementia Friendly Communities
It Takes a Team: The Role of the Interprofessional Team in a Collaborative Care Model
WEEK 5: Overview of National Plans and Policies
National Plans and Policies
Assessing Dimensions of Comprehensive Dementia Care
Q & A "Ask us anything"
Is this the book your Aunt got?
Obama: An Intimate Portrait it is a book by the White House photographer at the time. It is a big picture book of the Obamas.
I'll be honest locks are the best, they make some specifically for people with dementia that you can fairly easily install, are easy for regular people to open and close but are hard to figure out for dementia patients especially if you place them near the top or bottom of the doorframe. I got these for my dad and so far working very well:
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There no rinse soaps if that helps.
https://www.amazon.com/Scrubzz-Disposable-Rinse-Bathing-Wipes/dp/B06XQ9NQPQ
My mom used something like this on my dad https://www.walgreens.com/store/c/no-rinse-shampoo/ID=prod3946587-product
You can find stuff like this in your local pharmacy or medical supply store or just amazon.
Like others suggested you could see if you can get help. I think the county sent someone over once a week to wash my dad for free. See if your county office on aging or eldercare has such services or a list of volunteer organizations that can help.
Good luck.
Yes, but also no.
You can get wrist ones that are worn like a watch, they're automatically triggered if/when there is a fall. The ones we looked at the alarm goes to a company rather than to a member of the family. They weren't cheap, and nor was the contract, and my MiL refused to even consider wearing one even though she's had several falls recently.
Some chemists have a range of elderly 'aids', but perhaps the best people to ask might be your local GP practice, Age UK or disability information service - if you've got one.
Something else that may be worth looking into is padded trousers or pants, which offer hip protection - if your Nan would wear them.
edited to add
I wonder if it's worth looking at this sort of thing, which I found on Amazon. I have no idea if/how it works. https://www.amazon.co.uk/SureSafe-Personal-Alarms-Wristwatch-Pendant/dp/B00WIFPMBW/ref=sr_1_3_a_it/257-3656297-4634742?ie=UTF8&qid=1507415061&sr=8-3&keywords=fall+alarm
Ah sorry forgot to paste the link! It's called flush, https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=toilet.samruston.com.toilet&hl=en_US
This can also be a Transient Ischemic Attack- a "ministroke". His brain may have been oxygen deprived for a moment, and recovered. If that's the case, the risk of a major stroke is high.
No only do we have to watch someone we love endure Alzheimer's, we are not being told the truth about the drugs used to "improve cognition and function," or "slow the progress" of this disgusting disease. We are being mislead. Everyone that is touch by this disease or knows someone touched by this disease should know the truth about these drugs.
If you would like to pass this along to someone you know, here is the link.
Most behaviors don't last that long. Just as the disease progresses their behavior changes.
Dad loves this fidget cube. He puts things in his mouth so we use a lot of toddler toys.
If you have copies of old pictures she might enjoy looking through those. Dad use to enjoy sorting and stacking pictures. You could put some tiny bells or something that jingles on her door and she may need play with those instead.
I know you probably can’t use amazon but here is what a chuck is disposable and washable. The washable ones seem to last a bit over a year and a half, but would probably last much longer if they were air dried. They make it easy to lift someone to slide them up the bed, but the disposable can’t be used that way.
I can imagine how all of that goes. My MIL had IV antibiotics a few times and it was so hard to get her to leave her PIC line alone, so I definitely understand.
I thought maybe gloves might be a better approach just because it’s not something obviously on her skin that she can pick at.
I wonder if a little fidget blanket or something like it to keep her hands busy might distract her from it...at least a bit. My MIL picked at her face like crazy, so we got her a little cat that she could put her hands inside like a muff and it at least calmed the behavior down.
Kinda like this: Twiddle Classic Sensory Toys for Autistic Children, Dementia, and Alzheimers Patients | Fidget Toys for Therapy and Anxiety Relief https://www.amazon.com/dp/B009CR3JUK/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_fO3FFb87X42N1
If you can spare the seat maybe you could put some rubber cement or high gloss paint on it. :P or reusable liquid tack. https://www.amazon.com/Aleenes-Tack-Over-Liquid-Glue/dp/B00178QQ84/ref=mp_s_a_1_6?crid=2CYNC8F698HV2&keywords=clear+tack+liquid&qid=1669538436&sprefix=clear+tack+liquid%2Caps%2C247&sr=8-6
Basically something that may feel and look tacky and not quite dry, even if its dry.
The other commenters gave good advice. That said, my mom put something like this in place for my dad:
When she put the rails in place, she had a very slightly easier time moving my dad around sometimes. She'd put his hands directly on the rails and hed grip it really tight instinctively, then my mom could pull him up by hugging the rest of him and pulling up. Some times my dad resisted still, but sometimes hed push himself up to standing too, making it much easier on her. Once he was clearly upright sometimes hed be swaying a bit and he might start moving like hes sitting again, but it was easier to keep him up and then walk him over to the next place. He was a physically strong guy too, until near the end. If he didn't want to be moved, she couldn't have forced him, so she needed him to be at least a little willing.
And also bed rails on medical beds helped in a similar way, to get him up out of bed but also to roll him around while was on it to change sheets or diaper :p . Once she put his hand on the bar he'd grip it really tight and he'd stay in the position she put him in.
I'm sorry. This is really hard on everyone.
A nursing home isn't "locking him up." It's giving him the professional caretaking by a staff that a single untrained person really can't manage. Your proposal, if I'm reading it right, provides 30 hours of coverage weekly; that leaves your mother with 138 hours of handling it on her own, including almost all of the hardest sundowning hours. There's a reason one of the best books on Alzheimer's caretaking is called The Thirty-Six Hour Day. I think you can see why she might not see that as a solution.
If you were able to be a full-time caretaker, I imagine that would have come up already. So how else can you get your mom relief during those other 138 hours? Can you handle nights instead of days and take your dad to an adult day center during the day? Can you arrange (because the admin on this disease is nightmarish) and pay for a health care professional to come in and provide cover?
I don't know your father, your mother, or your family; I don't know the relevant finances (whether there's enough money for private pay or if they'll have to wait for a Medicaid bed); I don't know what facilities are available options for you. I'm therefore not saying she's for sure doing the right thing, because what do I know? But caretaking is such a strain that a significant percentage of caretakers die before the person with dementia does, and caretakers often are late in deciding it's time for memory care, making the move much harder on everybody, including the person with dementia. And an overwhelmed and exhausted caretaker can make for an unsafe situation, especially as it's only going to get harder and more grueling.
We got packs of these for my mom.
Ahh roomie situations are tricky. And of course the risk of losing buds. The earbuds themselves dont look like they have any controls on them tho, maybe you could buy cheaper buds in bulk and replace them as she loses them https://www.amazon.com/Wholesale-Earbuds-Headphones-Iphone-Android/dp/B01M637BAV/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=ODGP9PNF4YL1&keywords=cheap+earphones+bulk&qid=1660769070&sprefix=cheap+earphones+bulk%2Caps%2C198&sr=8-3
But the player itself is small so thats another thing to consider. I was hoping to find an mp3 player or even cd player that looked like a more traditional radio with controls that looked familiar but oh well. 🤷
Anyway good luck :)
Maybe something like this? https://www.amazon.com/Swimbuds-Headphones-Waterproof-Shuffle-Feature/dp/B018YKTD1Y/ref=mp_s_a_1_170?crid=3HDRJSNZD4DHM&keywords=mp3+walkman+buttons&qid=1660725112&sprefix=mp3+walkman+buttons%2Caps%2C208&sr=8-170
I suggest it bc it has minimal buttons and features. The only place she could get messed up is by holding to chnage tracks too long she could change volume on accident.
I actually tried to see if there are "retro" looking mp3 players that look like cassette players but couldnt find any. But it might be possible.
What i would have looked for for my Alzheimer's person (mine passed away a while ago) would be physical buttons that have obvious markings and layout preferably in a row or two, and volume sliders or dials, just like youd see on an 80s stereo or walkman. I think that would be most intuitive. Id avoid things with touch screens or touch sensitive dials, and if avoidable, a radial button layout (but id give it a try if thats all i could find).
The product above is the most basic to operate that i could find. No menus to screw around with her. Hopefully no pesky audio menus to mess with her when she turns it on too, but i didn't check.
Wow. You do need help. One thing we did (besides getting knives and scissors put up) is to install some door locks on any door that leads to the outside. They are on Amazon and easy to install. Hard for older or arthritic fingers to open and if you put it up higher on the door, it really helps. Even I have a hard time sometimes.
Here is the link:
https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B085M9WW9P/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
My MIL cannot get out of the house without us. (We have never left her alone while she has lived with us.) We also put cameras in the kitchen that point to her hallway and one in her room and in the living room. You can check them on your phone or computer - sound and video so you will know what she is up to when you walk away. Most of the time my husband or I are my daughter are close by on the main floor. But at least I can go clean the kitchen or wash clothes and not worry she will wander out the door and we won't hear.
My husband and I understand your fatigue. We don't get much help, either, but if one of us needs to get out for a little while, we coordinate. Trips to the dollar tree or local antique store are a great little hour away. Even a trip to get groceries alone can be invigorating.
My MIL is also o a medication that helps her anxiety. Fewer days seem to be active days as she progresses.
She has tried to climb the stars before, but if we think that is going to happen , or she seems extra active for some reason, we put up a baby gate on the stairs.
I hope these can help you until you can get some respite or a friend to sit with her. We get it. HUGS to you.
Ohh theres also no-rinse body washes and shampoos. My mom used that on Alzheimer folks in our fam, but not all the time. Just when she had no other options, as we weren't sure how good that was for long term.
We used a different brand but something like these:
https://www.amazon.com/No-Rinse-Shampoo-floz-473-1/dp/B00008KA7P
https://www.seniorsmatter.com/affiliate/the-best-no-rinse-body-wash/
I used this for my husband. LogicMark Freedom Alert Emergency... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B002IMW8O4?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share
It’s not like most life alerts. It’s basically a tiny cordless phone with a direct dial button. I had our programmed to call me, three other numbers and then 911 if no one answered. When you answer the system directs you to press a number so it knows you answered and it doesn’t have to call the next #. Then the two of you can have a conversation. It only works with in range but so do the true life alerts. Ours worked in our yard but your mileage may vary. No monthly fee other than your normal land line fee, something many older people already pay for.
Very VERY normal. Grief is an exhausting process (sending hugs).
Gary started "Dementia Mentors" for us. He wrote this after care-partnering for first his father then his mother; "After-Effects of Caregiving" >> https://www.amazon.com/Aftereffects-Caregiving-Gary-Joseph-Leblanc/dp/1478759828
I would be super very interested. I am actually a programmer. I don't know anything about this kind of technology but I do have an acuity for this kind of thing. If you are going to work on this and need some assistance I might be able to help. Have you even built an app before? Do you know what you're doing?
I was thinking about how the app "If This Then That" works. I could sign my mother up for some internet streaming service maybe? And then create an IFTTT routine that's triggered by some signal from our app to do something. It's basically just an app with a customizable face that lets you put large buttons in places and put images on them like the CNN logo and then connect that button to a trigger for your home automation.
EDIT: https://ifttt.com/maker_webhooks
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fVstHpHXJ6o
So here IFTTT can be triggered by webhooks. Also any TV that can accept a "chrome cast" (which my mothers tv does) could be configured to get "casted" by IFTTT after she presses some button on her iphone.
Bedsores are a difficult problem. To help understand the problem place a clear drinking glass on your palm and press gently. Your skin underneath will turn white. This is from the pressure forcing the blood away from the skin. This lack of blood over repeated long periods of time causes the skin to fail. This is contributed to by bathroom accidents. The key is changing positions often. Use pillows and rolled up towels to prop up legs, keep them on one side and then the other etc. I attempt for a change every 25 mins. A cream called Calmo sept one that also helps. Apply liberally.
Calmoseptine Ointment Tube 4 Oz... https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01INL3TKU?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share
My MIL likes to play with Pop-its. I think this a good tactile activity for your grandma who can't see very well. It's like an easy and reusable version of bubble wrap. Hope it helps! https://www.amazon.ca/Fidget-Bubble-Sensory-Toy%EF%BC%8CStress-Anti-Anxiety/dp/B095C19MHX/ref=asc_df_B095C19MHX/?tag=googlemobshop-20&linkCode=df0&hvadid=459814829715&hvpos=&hvnetw=g&hvrand=17595649899703656705&hvpone=&...
My dad gets a lot of use out of the Playschool Fidget Cube. He now tends to put things in his mouth so the smaller fidget toys aren't safe. We also got him some of those silicon bubble pop things. Oh and a plastic car. He enjoys that too. Those fidget blankets don't hold his attention because he thinks it's just a blanket.
He used to enjoy pictures and magazines. Any catalog we got in we would give to him, until he started tearing it and eating the paper. So the toddler toys have been great
Use Med E Lert for mom. Worked really well for several years. Eventually she would just dump the meds out to stop the alarm and set them aside to take later. Lots of missed doses and finally an overdose because she kept seeing the little piles of pills and thought she needed to take them. Med-E-Lert Premium Locking Automatic Pill Dispenser with Solid White Lid, 28 Slot Electronic Medication Organizer https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B087JXZ7ZR/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_4HQ71YNHDC9YANNMKN67?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
My SO has been on 23mg Aricept (max dose) for about a year and several smaller doses the year before. They have recently added Numenda as well. He has had no significant side effects from these drugs. It is important to understand that these drugs slow the progression of dementia, they can not reverse it. Taking these types of drugs consistently is important. Unfortunately it is hard to tell if these drugs are working if they are doing their jobs. The cost is a second concern. I found www.rxoutreach.com was able to get Aricept for about 1/10th what walgreens charged. They didn't care that he had insurance, it is based solely on income and has generous boundaries. A pill dispenser may come in handy. We use this one: Ivation Automatic Pill Dispenser, Electronic Medication Reminder with new Lock, Louder Alarm and Flashing Light - Solid Top https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FL623G2/ref=cm_sw_r_awd_yBHMub0HZDB8R
I set it up for a two week period. It beeps when his pills are due. He turns it upside down over a bowl and the pills drop out. If he doesn't drop them out I can see that he missed that day's pills. It may help your situation.
Therapy! Seriously helps me. I also get a lot out of mindfulness/breath work. I really enjoyed this book as well: caring for a loved one with dementia
Puzzles (nothing more than 100 pieces)
Listening to music (The Beatles are my go to)
Sticker by number books like this
Memory Lane Games trivia app is great. The questions are super easy and the pictures are meant to encourage conversation
Sorting laundry (This one might be person specific, but my mother in law finds it relaxing to sort and match up socks. I keep a laundry basked full of cheap colorful socks around for when she doesn’t know what to do with herself.)
We got these for my MIL. You really have to squeeze the knob at the right place. It works well to keep her out of the washroom where she used to make a big mess. We also put them on the front door of the house. Hope it helps EUDEMON 6 Pack Baby Safety Door Knob Covers Door Knob Locks https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B077YTGHXR/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_g_T9595T8DRHG4M6FDY72E
A year ago, we purchased these door locks and put them up high. She's never noticed as she doesn't look up. She can unlock the regular locks, but the door still won't open. They're a lifesaver and I didn't have to worry every time I heard her moving around at night or if I was in the bathroom during the day.
Door Lock for Home Security (2-Pack) - Easy to Install Door Latch Device https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B08B35YC3C
We used these toddler door things that helped.
We also put cheap alarms on the door that sounded when open. Then we put cheap slide locks at the bottom of the door that we could slide open with our toe. My dad never knew to look down.
Get these installed asap. A tracker will still allow her to get out and get hurt before someone woke up and noticed she was gone. Too many things can go wrong if she is by herself.
The appliance lock when the dishwasher is dirty may work. I work with some families that use them in the kitchen https://www.amazon.com/Safety-1st-Multi-Purpose-Appliance-Packaging/dp/B00AS693R2
It does sound like it’s a good activity for him. when it comes to activity it’s not really the end result or product that matters, it’s the process of doing that’s important. We all need meaning and purpose and a feeling of accomplishment. Maybe if the dishwasher is locked you could have another dish related activity like sorting silverware or putting away clean items sitting out. It doesn’t hurt to make up stuff to do and someone living with dementia will often happily do the same thing again and again.
My son (3) has been noticing grandma (my Mom) has been acting weird. I've not explained it very well to him because I don't think he'll completely understand. But I've heard some very good things about the book "weeds in Nana's garden" and I purchased a copy. It'll be getting here today, I can let you know how it is? It has an odd animation style but I can definitely overlook that if it's helpful. It's rated 3-9 years old.
We have battery operated motion detector lifts so my LO can find their way at night when they get up. Something like this. https://www.amazon.com/Mr-Beams-Battery-Powered-Motion-Sensing-Stick-Anywhere/dp/B01G1LFS08/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_sspa?crid=2X0JMWFR4LRU5&dchild=1&keywords=wireless+night+lights&qid=1635587953&sprefix=wireless+night&sr=8-2-spons&p...
I have this a Clippasafe Socket Protector which goes over the socket and plugs. It may not be suitable if your loved one is likely to open the box, but it may result in out of sight out of mind. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B003TFCB6E/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_navT_g_HR6ZEGPSCJ9QFY8SZZ5Y
We had a different problem. My mom couldn't use a phone to dial numbers, so if there was something wrong in the early stages, she didn't know how to reach one of us. We looked into a phone like this so that my mom could call people correctly. There were no numbers, which made it easier for her. Maybe it could help the random calls in your situation if you put in photos and used white paint or nail polish to cover the numbers under the pictures?
https://www.amazon.com/Future-Call-Picture-Speakerphone-FC-1007SP/dp/B01JZYSK0S
This may seem too juvenile for him, but I gave my brother (late stage 5 Alzheimers) this box of nuts & bolts to fiddle with. When I gave it to him, I said, "These toy bolts and nuts are all mixed up in this box. My neighbor's son wants your help with them. When you have time, will you match the colors and shapes, and screw them back together?" He "played" with them and lined up matched, screwed-together pairs on his window sill. I'm not sure how long it held his attention, because the length of our visit was limited, but I could tell it interested him enough to keep his hands busy for a while (but admittedly, not as much as taking apart every picture frame in other patients' rooms or disassembling his lamp). I'm visiting him again later this month if they don't extend the Delta Covid quarantine, so I'm curious to see if he's used them at all (I live 4 hours away so I only visit once or twice a month).
You can find trackers on Amazon. Slip it in his billfold, on the key ring, into his jacket pocket. I too wish you could chip them. I understand the moral dilemma, but we’re talking about people who can’t think for themselves anymore and who will never regain their ability to. It would help in so many cases.
My friend’s partner took the car recently and ran out of gas on the interstate. She got out of the car and left it sitting there while crossing to get to the edge. Luckily, by the grace of whatever you believe in; no one was injured.
She couldn’t even remember why she was in the car. My friend had stopped to go to the bathroom and she was gone just that fast. I’m lucky my grandmother doesn’t have a car anymore or the wanting to wander around. I can’t imagine having to deal with that too.
Nutale Key Finder, 4-Pack Bluetooth Tracker Item Locator with Key Chain for Keys Pet Wallets or Backpacks and Tablets https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08HM2D4W3/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_GF07C0M9S3R8N1MB4YXH?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
I'll also add a link to this book https://www.amazon.ca/Alzheimers-Solution-Breakthrough-Symptoms-Cognitive/dp/0062666487/ref=sr_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=alzheimers+solution&qid=1614079831&sr=8-1 i got the audiobook from audible and enjoyed it. It talks a lot about diet, exercise, and getting good sleep.
Maybe a liquid bubbler thing (the kind that look kind of like an hourglass timer) or a tangle
Or just more styles of spinners
Or one of the puzzle cubes like this style
A retro option is a magic rail twirler. That's probably actually my top recommendation now that I think about it
no but there's a huge article about coconut oil and alzheimers on the internet, i'm sure there's plenty more now. the MCT oils in coconut oil fuel the brain very well.
You can actually buy pure MCT oil on amazon: http://www.amazon.com/NOW-Foods-100%25-32-Fluid-Ounces/dp/B0019LRY8A/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1426579004&sr=8-1&keywords=mct+oil
If you want to even get something better look into "bulletproof" brand... they actually have a plethora of health products, anyway they have something called 'octane oil' it's basically 18x Stronger Than Coconut Oil. https://www.upgradedself.com/products/bulletproof-upgraded-brain-octane-oil
Anyway just thoguht I'd show you some alternatives to just coconut oil.
I got it on amazon. The brand is floureon. I was trying to post a pic but I don’t know how. But if I did it correctly here is the link. It works great for daytime and nighttime use. https://www.amazon.com/FLOUREON-Wireless-Security-Babyphone-Temperature/dp/B072R28RKC
It's my bad for forgetting to add, I'm looking for a lock for a door knob. I've tried Amazon, and the only option I've really found is this one, but it's a little too simplistic to work.
Here's one more option. Amazon has a variety of cell phone lanyards. Instead of locating the phone after you've misplaced it, this might help to prevent losing it in the first place. Good luck.
I would post on /r/findareddit, asking for a hair advice reddit.
Be as descriptive as you can of her hair texture - In the world of hair care, there can be pretty distinct differences in techniques and products depending on texture.
My only experience is with horses - I've successfully detangled manes and tails many times. The product I've used is Cowboy Magic Detangler & Shine. It's an oil type "finishing" product, smells nice, works really well, and a good quality product that overall helps hair. If you search Amazon for "hair oil", you'll see lots of similar products for people.
As for technique, the one thing that's really helped me is just leaving it in overnight. Of course, with horses, you don't have sheets and blankets and pillows and mattresses to consider! So maybe with your mil, apply in the morning, planning to do detangling in the evening. Anyway, main point is, when I would saturate, and then immediately go to work with a brush, I wouldn't get very far. But when I would saturate, then come back the next day with a brush, I could get tangles out pretty easily.
Anyway, hope that helps, good luck!
Edit -
I'm going to second /u/justmerc 's suggestion - My son had long hair when he was a kid, and I would do that very thing, just slather on the conditioner in the bath, comb it easily, then rinse thoroughly.
Sensory balls! Like these: https://www.amazon.com/Infantino-Textured-Multi-Ball-Set/dp/B00DJPK8PA/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=sensory+balls&qid=1599697692&sr=8-3
​
Many Alzheimer's patients find them calming and it's a great way to keep their hands busy. Otherwise, I hope all works out ...
I used this one for my husband. It has a clear lid so you can see when they have missed a pill time. It rotates so you can set up a week or two depending on how often it’s set for. It doesn’t ensure they take the pills but it will beep until it’s turned over letting the pills fall out. I gave him a special bowl to dump the pills in and put bottled water on the counter next to it to make sure he had no reason to leave of get distracted. I even used it when his dementia progressed beyond the point of being able to medicate himself to make sure I remembered to give him meds at the proper times.
LiveFine Automatic Pill Dispenser, 28-Day Electronic Medication Organizer with Alarm Reminders, Flashing Light and Safety Lock - Dispenses Prescriptions Up to 6 Times Per Day - Clear Lid https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00FL620B0/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_EFLvFb33AGEJR
When I was worried about this I looked into installing one of these on the battery. While it would be annoying to open the hood post arch time you park at home or want to leave home, knowing they aren’t able to leave without you knowing is nice.
Another thing we tried along the way was a landline phone that has pictures on the buttons and a cell phone that had a SOS button. These didn't work out for various reasons but everyone is effected by Alzheimer's in a different way so these may work for you.
Creating Moments of Joy for the Person With Alzheimer's or Dementia 4th Edition by Jolene Bracke
This book was given to everyone in my caregivers support group and we found it very useful.
You can also consider something like this: https://www.amazon.com/Simple-Music-Player-Alzheimers-dementia/dp/B01B9THLUW it's the most simple music player out there and specifically designed with very few buttons to minimize confusion. Load it with mp3s and open the flap to play and close it to stop. The button on it is used to skip to the next song. I personally hate how it does not have a go back to the previous song button, but it will do its job of playing music or any other audio you put onto it. I've seen it used in nursing homes and retirement homes all the time and is great for anyone with dementia, alzheimer's or any other cognitive deficits.
As someone in a similar situation to you I doubt any of the people saying you are a bad daughter know what they are talking about.
I would advise picking up the book The 36 hour day it is a fantastic guide to caring for someone with alzheimers. If you do not wish to pay for it you may be able to pick it up at the library.
https://www.amazon.com/36-Hour-Day-Alzheimer-Disease-Dementias/dp/1455521159
Also as a stop gap measure her insurance should be able to provide for a home health aid through patterns in care, personal touch or various other agencies.
Please keep us all informed so we may help you on the journey.
To my knowledge the only definitive way to diagnose Alzheimer's is an autopsy. There are many kinds of dementia; what's important is the kind of care and support the patient gets. Since you're willing to do some reading, you might start with The 36-Hour Day and also look at alz.org.
I know this is an older post but my father recently dealt with this challenge. What he did was have a cyclone fence installed with gates and then put a clip through the gate. My mother can't figure out how to get past the clip. This makes it so that she can have the run of the house/yard but not get out into the street.
This is the clip: https://www.amazon.com/ALAZCO-Superior-Quality-8-Inch-Swivel/dp/B0187QWT2K/
Obviously, this only works if the person is at the stage where they can't figure out the clip consistently.
I second becoming familiar with alz.org. Also, The 36-Hour Day is a great book with lots of practical advice.
As for making your mom feel comfortable about it, it seems to me that everyone experiences Alzheimer's differently. My husband didn't realize that he had it and we never mentioned it. His decline was very slow so it was easy to gloss over his loss of abilities one by one in very small steps. What might at first seem horrifying — like having to shave him or take off his socks for him — turns out to feel like normal routine when there's a long transition and when you go about it matter-of-factly.
Help your mom to save face whenever possible. I remember telling my husband, "Gosh those new socks are so tight, a person needs help getting them off..." Don't draw attention to her forgetfulness, just go along with it. If she asks you the same question six times in a row, respond each time as though it were the first. You can get into a dreamy sort of rhythm that is actually pleasant instead of frustrating.
Patrick and I took a selfie with Dr. Carson but I'm going to email her for permission before throwing it to the wolves. We dressed in our Sunday's best. This is our Oscars and we treated it as such.
I really do believe that at its core Alzheimer's awareness has a marketing issue. Educate yourself, educate your friends, change the world. Everything I do is to make my Papa proud. God bless!
http://www.amazon.com/Becoming-Alzheimers-Whisperer-Resource-Caregivers/dp/1507529961
You might have a look at this page from the alz.org site. Another great resource is The 36-hour Day.
Is your mom still driving? One thing I didn't know is that if a person is diagnosed with cognitive impairment, at least in California, the doctor is required to file a report with the Department of Motor Vehicles. In our case, the DMV required my husband to report to a special testing center to evaluate his driving ability.
Also, before you have your appointment, you should talk to your family lawyer about powers of attorney and such. Once a person is diagnosed with cognitive impairment, their legal status may change.
Your mom will be at the doctor's for only a brief time. From my experience, the effects of the disease seem to come and go. So your mom could be especially out-of-it at the doctor's office or especially alert. Therefore the initial diagnosis might not tally with what you think. It will take repeated visits for the neurologist to really assess your mom's abilities. So listen to the doctor, but understand that you and your dad probably know best what your mom can and can't do.
Vent thread. I love it.
Mom's currently in independent living with her husband, but apparently she's been leaving her apt very early in the morning and wandering the halls. I realized at her last doc appt that she doesn't even know what decade we're in. I repurposed an old cheap android tablet to be a dementia clock and programmed in mealtimes and recurring activities. I hope it helps. Free app - https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.fashmel.alzclock
The facility people want me to move her to memory care but she says she is "not interested; I'll just move back to [childhood town she hasn't visited since her parents died 15 years ago]!" I dunno what I'm going to do with that situation. Plus we can't really afford one parent in memory care and one in assisted living.
Oh yeah, one of the other ladies saw us checking out memory care and was like "what were you doing on the OTHER SIDE? They don't want to put you THERE, do they?! You don't need to go over there, have you seen the people there?! I was across the street (assisted living) and it was TERRIBLE." Thanks, Ms. Pat. -_-
Visiting this weekend. I usually crash on their couch but apparently they're both dealing with some stomach stuff (bathroom is in their LR). Fingers crossed. There is a hotel nearby if it comes down to it.