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Joey for Reddit
The most popular reviews in /r/BestofRedditorUpdates:
According to Similar Web a slight majority of AAM's social traffic comes from Reddit. I know I personally didn't know about the site before I visited this sub. Maybe posting here isn't as harmful as you think?
Can I add, the book she may be referring to is https://www.amazon.com/Dealing-People-Stand-Revised-Expanded/dp/0071785728 and I heartily recommend it. It has saved my sanity on more than one occasion.
Lets hope that link works. They look so awesome!!
You can get Merino wool socks much cheaper than that if you want to try them. I have a few pairs and they last a long time.
You could also try a washer cleaning tablet! Machines also need a clean and sometimes the build up caused by fabric softeners and detergent can be really rank and wash into your clothing. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08DVFZTTG?aa_adgroupid=_Ampd__B08DVFZTTG___WMC____Sourcing_Campaign_142912067404&aa_campaignid=_Ampd__B08DVFZTTG___WMC____Sourcing_Campaign_18321078883&aa_creativeid=ampd-ad-621601412093_kwd-59174518889_dev-u_ext...
Some totally can shave, but other can't at all. It depends how tight the curl is in the beard hair. For instance, the US military used to enforce a shaving rule to ensure that gas masks fit, but had to make an exemption (https://www.airforcetimes.com/opinion/commentary/2021/10/14/shaving-waivers-disproportionately-affect-black-airmen-delay-promotions/)
Here's a product I tried that's made especially for black men with this problem! https://www.amazon.com/SoftSheen-Carson-Magic-Strength-Shaving-Powder/dp/B00CREUEV2
Spoiler: it was awful lol.
I read the whole thing wondering why they didn't use that paint to turn their window into a mirror.
But why did she take off her clothes if she thought he was dying??? Like…haste????
ETA: To everyone who got butthurt and my incredulity that this situation is real. It is actually a straight up romance novel.The book this is ripped from
Nah, it's bookception because here is the book written just before the Reddit post that, whilst the plot isn't totally centered around it, has the adorkable girl jumps into ocean to save the Navy SEAL scene too.
So here's the comment thread where I learned about this: https://www.reddit.com/r/BestofRedditorUpdates/comments/ym1k3k/tifu_by_jumping_into_a_lake_in_my_brapanties_to/iv6bxxp/?context=3
And here's the book: https://www.amazon.com/Finding-Kenna-SEAL-Team-Hawaii-ebook/dp/B08LDNYR9N
If you really hate the person use this tofu and dumping it all over their place. They won’t be able to get the smell out. If you really hate them deep fry it but wear clothes you don’t mind ruining. https://www.amazon.com/WangZhiHe-Stinky-Tofu-330g-considered/dp/B09N7MRGJ4
Have you seen this book?
That's where I got the concept of fandoms being a replacement for some of the social functions previously filled by Christianity. She also talks a lot about New Thought and its descendants, the sort of witchy feminism that you see on /r/WitchesVsPatriarchy, and self-care/wellness culture.
She finally settles on two things that seem to fill all the functions of a religion: social justice culture and the Silicon Valley techno-utopianism. One of her overarching points is that both are enacted publicly in transactional, consumerist ways, because even radicals can't stop being Americans.
Buy one of those devices that let you pee standing up (e.g. https://www.amazon.ca/Urination-Reusable-Silicone-Foolproof-Companion/dp/B089LP5F93) and pee all over the seats too, until the men finally start complaining. They have to poo sometime, right? Then it becomes their problem too. Or maybe I'm being too petty lol, and you should just use the device to pee without having to sit down.
I have a brace designed for straightening your posture. It's basicslly two backpack straps that pull your shoulders together forcing your chest out to keep your back straight. It was something I bought on. I would imagine it was a shitty, (obviously) more painful version of that. My arms would tingle if the straps got bunched up and would also pinch under my arms.
https://www.amazon.com/Latest-Model-Posture-Corrector-Women/dp/B07VST9VYH/
Like this
I sit on one of these at work all day. It forces you to sit up and is really comfortable. I take it off if my coworkers need to use my chair and if I sit again before putting it back down I get lower back pain.
Mental schemas - Circuits built over time create instinct that influences your actions and emotions
But those Instincts are very different from person to person
Very heavily based on personal experience and personal truths
If you're interested in changing mental schemas this is the authority on the subject
You can also lookup "Memory Reconsolidation Therapy" on youtube
Someone has a gender swapped version but instead of a diver it's an actual mermaid (and is actually one of my fave romances) The Siren Saves The Billionaire by Kristen Painter
Or one by Max Monroe. Interestingly enough, the blurb on this one is written as a Reddit AITA post too.
Vietnamese coffee is one of my very favorite things! My Laotian former boss uses this ground coffee that's surprisingly accessible. I do mine in my moka pot most of the time since the phin filter I have clogs way too easily, but it works well with pourover filters, too (I used to use these that you hang directly on the cup).
Good for you you only have 6 photos of you & your wife in your entire house. Some people like photos. I have a bevy of photos and cute notes from him all around my home and also at my work office and lab bench. My partner has photos with his best friends who are not even dead (*gasp*).
There are also different ways of grieving and an emerging idea of grief counseling is based on not the idea that you move on and "let go", but you find little ways to keep them in your life so they are never really "gone". Best demonstrated in this poem and this book.
The choices we make on behalf of people like OOP’s sister are always hard, and they’re so often made from a place of isolation and ignorance. If folks here are frustrated and going “okay, how do we do better?” they might be interested in Learning From My Daughter: The Value and Care of Disabled Minds. It’s definitely philosophically dense, I had to pause sometimes and go read about some other concept or term before I could go on, but the whole premise is that the author is a philosopher and theorist whose adult daughter is not too different from OOP’s sister, and she uses that experience and her philosophical training to unpack all kinds of questions about disability, dependence, caring for others, what a good life is, etc. There’s even a chapter that her adult, non-disabled son contributes to about the experiences of being the “normal” kid in a family with a severely disabled kid.
Definitely not saying that OOP or her parents should have dug into this book, but if there are others out there like me who read about a situation like this and go “but how the fuck do we even start to think about making that situation at least survivable for all parties involved,” Kittay is definitely somebody who has more than started to think about how to approach it. It’s not an utterly hopeless set of circumstances but we need to think about it very differently than we think about most of the casual caregiving we participate in for our loved ones.
These are the ones I use. 10/10 would recommend, my grandma and I experimented when I bought them and the overnight ones held almost 8oz of water!
A recommended read that you night be able to find at your local library https://www.amazon.com/Warriors-Camera-Kurosawa-Revised-Expanded-ebook/dp/B0877CBTHL?ref_=d6k_applink_bb_dls&dplnkId=99b66783-5905-4f39-bcc4-e86bfe81a543
Awesome, thanks! I've just started making him stairs everywhere. He used to be so athletic that he's jump and climb anything, and now he shorted the hop onto the couch last month.
I would recommend this, though without the basket, for getting up onto desks. Mine's my WFH supervisor so this was an important consideration.
I'm worried about his back since I don't think he can stretch like a normal cats can, but I'm not sure what to do about it.
Because work has to be work and you can't enjoy it. Be happy they aren't requiring your microphone/camera to be on at all times so they know you're actually at your computer not doing other things having your coworker work for you cough https://www.amazon.com/Undetectable-Mover-Parts-Software-Automatically/dp/B08GPGZ4Z6/ref=sr_1_3?crid=1E3IE62N6393R&keywords=mouse%2Bjiggler&qid=1663769917&sprefix=mouse%2Bji%2Caps%2C427&sr=8-3&th=1 cough
My neighbors cat will come up to you all sweet and innocent. And if you pet him more than however much he allows at that moment, he will gently bite your hand. Repeat this as many times as you want to because he’s not being aggressive and will let you keep petting him. It’s like that evil crocodile game except the end result is gentle pressure on your hand
It's very, very hard for abusers to change even if they want to - and most of them don't want to. It would mean willingly giving up their entitlement and their power. Why Does He Do That? by Lundy Bancroft is an essential book for understanding abusive men.
(Bancroft fully acknowledges that some women are abusers as well, but his book focuses on the psychology and motivations of abusive men specifically.)
There are a bunch of different versions available online; I ordered mine from Amazon, but other places sell them too.
They come in either large circles or 'spoon shape'; I personally prefer spoon shape, just because I think it's more seamless under tshirts. Here's an example of what I'm talking about:
Note the size on that is for c/d/e cup. They come in different sizes. They're re-usable, but they do lose their stickiness eventually.
I hope you have a good visit with your friends!
So the fact that he loves her makes up for all the lying, gaslighting, and dismissiveness? NO. He's still very immature, he saw her suffering and did nothing about it. Having a healthy relationship is work, love is not enough. He had (at the very least) an emotional affair and can't even acknowledge it.
You may want to read a book called "Not Just Friends" It's a book that any couple should read and puts a lot of emphasis on why communication and honesty are the basis of happy and long-lasting marriages.
There's a book I like to recommend on this topic called The Gift of Fear that discusses how to protect yourself from violence. THere's a large portion of it dedicated to relationships, but it covers all kinds of situations and why some people are victimized more than others.
Some people are just very good at manipulating people. They typically lack any sort of empathy and may fall into some flavor of narcissism. Most people though don't really start showing who they really are as people until around the 6 month mark of serious dating. That's around the time when most people begin to get comfortable and let their guard down. There's a phrase "when people show you who they are, believe them", but what happens when you feel you're so in love with the idea of who you think that person is, that you don't want to see it. Seeing it means you should probably end things... and this is where love can make us stupid.
Anyone can fall into a relationship with an abuser. Doesn't matter how smart or savvy you are, or your gender or orientation. Trust can only be proven with consistency. Words mean nothing. I'm no authority but I think all anyone can do is enjoy the feelings but when something starts to look sketchy it's important to not forget because forgetting feels convenient.
I've recommended it before in other subs, but Sam Kean has an excellent book about the unexpected ways literal brain damage can manifest, going through the history of how scientists have studied the brain. Really fascinating but approachable read. Slate had a long excerpt from his book on Phineas Gauge (CW: some slightly gory photos).
I think for people starting out cooking, apps like Tasty from Buzzfeed are very useful.
They have very clear videos, adjustable portion sizes and commenter reviews. The Internet page is not as good or clear but the app is great.
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.buzzfeed.tasty
Do you like any kind of Mexican food - tacos, burritos, etc.? You can take any Mexican dish and swap the meat out for beans and it works perfectly. I liked to get the canned black beans (like these) and prepare them like this:
Dump the whole can into a pan. Including the water; don't drain it off.
Add your choice of seasonings: salt+pepper+chili powder is a safe bet. I like adding a little Chipotle paste and finely diced red onions. Lemon or lime juice is excellent, as are fresh herbs (e.g. cilantro), but you should add those things at the end (not now).
Set the heat to medium-high, when it starts to bubble, turn it to low.
Let it gently simmer for like 5 minutes, until ~some of the water has boiled off and it reaches the consistency you want. It depends on what you're making: if you're doing tacos, I would let it go a little longer to make them a bit less soupy and therefore less messy.
Remove from heat. If you're going to add lemon, lime, or herbs, stir them in now. I highly recommend fresh lime juice, as in squeezed from an actual lime, but don't overdo it as it has a very strong flavor (1/2 lime per can of beans is about right).
And that's it. Use the beans instead of ground beef/other meat you normally use, otherwise use the normal ingredients for your tacos or whatever you're making.
Instead of a weird bra, just wear something like this under your bra. https://www.amazon.com/Reusable-Adhesive-Invisible-Pasties-Silicone/dp/B0B3LL2VNW
I don’t need my more attention drawn to my chest. But it’s also nice to wear an unlined bra.
This one you get three boyfriends and each boyfriend has two dicks
I tend to make strange jokes to the miss that are worded as absurd threats, like 'Im going to buy you a dozen ponies and have them delivered to your work" or "once I get my hands on you I'm tattooing the full cast of big mouth on your neck"
One of my favorites is mentioning how there's an entire recipe book for cooking with cum and how I'm going to make her some nice Cum Pudding. Obviously she tells me to go fuck myself (yes that's the point dear) but hearing this nightmare story sure made my joke much more haunting.
She's threatened to install cameras in the kitchen as a response.
Note, I would not actually do this, and what this guy did (if real) is really fucked up
The House of Lim: A Study of a Chinese Farm Family
For research. It delves alot into the adopted daughters and the culture around it. I did a report on it in college.
You could maybe try getting her a long pillow to hold/cuddle while she sleeps.
A pregnancy pillow like this could work? My wife got one for her back pain (she is not pregnant), so that's how I know about them and that they are useful for things other than pregnancy.
Yea both books are on Amazon
If you DM me an address you can receive packages, I will buy a copy of the book linked below for you.
Regardless of your situation, your wife chronically disrespects your boundaries. This book is a fabulous blueprint to communicating and setting boundaries that you and your wife will really benefit from.
Good luck!
If you love hedgehogs you need to read this book!
Shameless plug for a good cause. I am from Italy And I recommended the book A Handful of Happiness. It’s the story of the Italian vet Massimo Vacchetta and how he was suffering from depression until he rescued a hedgehog and it changed his life.
He now runs a hedgehog and animal rehabilitation center La Ninna (named after the first hedgehog he saved!)
Be warned it’s a tearjerker! But all the profits go towards funding his rehabilitation work.
I've got a pair of those closed Crocs that I use to cook with at home to keep my bare feet safe while working and also helps my back from bothering me by having my feet be supported.
There's stuff like this https://www.amazon.com/Amplifier-Britzgo-BHA-220-Audiologist-Designed/dp/B0194OSS4C/ref=mp_s_a_1_4?keywords=hearing+aid&qid=1656519502&sr=8-4 that looks like a hearing aid, although it's technically called a hearing amplifier. But I doubt most people can tell the difference by appearance. They can be pretty cheap depending on where you get them from, but I don't recommend it.
Oop can get one of these and make throat slash gestures and point at coworkers crotches if he want to show them what a real threat looks like lol
https://www.amazon.com/Hutzler-3571-571-Banana-Slicer/dp/B0047E0EII
There’s this book called the gift of fear that I think all young people, especially young women who are more likely to be targets, should read. It’s recommended by a couple self defense teachers I know, and it’s helped me recognize in my past relationships where I wrote off toxic and behaviors that could lead to abusive situations.
The phenomenon you’re talking about is written about in that book. There’s something that changes in a person’s body language when they’ve experienced a traumatic event, especially when you’ve had your personal agency stripped from you like in a sexual assault. People looking to victimize others are able to identify that and seek those people out, I’d wager it’s largely unconscious, like when you get a read off of someone but can’t put your finger on why you got that read. But yeah, it’s like how some children who were abused as kids end up with abusers as adults, whereas a kid who never experienced abuse can be less likely to end up with an abuser (but not zero, anyone can end up in an abusive relationship)
Anyway, I strongly recommend that book.
I lost my jacket in Japan at the airplane and the wonderful staff delayed services to retrieve it for me. I was soo embarrassed and thankful to them. It was a jacket from a game company I loved and they dont make that merch anymore.
Sadly I lost said same jacket in Japan a year later- this time never to be found. I think my jacket wanted to stay in the country lol.
Also Im horrible with jackets.
@pastelbunnyyy I had the same problem too, but I bought myself one of these that I wear over my neck and it has been a godsend when I travel to both Japan and PH when the stuff is not in my purse. Plus its always infront so less way for pickpocketrs to get.
I have an upcoming trip to PH and SG and I plan to upgrade to one of these chest sling bags
Omg that picture. That is 100% the face of a dog who has just eaten something they shouldn’t have and is pretty sure they’re going to get away with it.
My cat stress-grooms too. I sometimes have to cone her, though we’ve gotten a point where it usually isn’t needed. Have you tried the soft, pillow kind of collars? They keep them from licking, but are more comfortable and don’t restrict vision as much. My cat has a strawberry one, an orange one, and an avocado one. Here’s a link to one as an example: https://www.amazon.ca/dp/B09NVVB7FY/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_CFYGYWW9F5EJG5WA8PH8
Side note: For residual bio smells in clothes, a detergent like this is worth a try.
I use these for working outside and I also commonly wear them as undershirts when I want a t shirt or something else. They're very comfortable and protect you from the sun. Not very expensive either. Would recommend
I personally found MPF or any logging that specifically tracked calories to be more difficult for me, however, I did have some decent luck with this health tracker when I was using it regularly. I need to get back to it.
I was reading a book a while back (https://www.amazon.com/Inheritance-Memoir-Genealogy-Paternity-Love/dp/1524732710) where the writer had struggled her while life with her Jewish identity due to not looking Jewish. In that case they had a kind of plausible deniability and obviously the parents didn’t want to believe she wasn’t her father’s biological daughter, but even without finding out that secret affected her.
I used the vinegar and soap plastic bottle 'funnel trap', you can make them more effective by placing the trap next to a lamp, or even better, an aquarium or grow light LED (you can buy tiny grow light or fishbowl LED UV grow lamps for really cheap on Amazon, something like this or this
Point the lamp directly over the trap, it will attract them for far away, then they'll smell the vinegar and hop right in :)
https://www.amazon.co.uk/KnitPro-Symfonie-Crochet-Tunisian-Multi-Color/dp/B0030M1B1W?th=1 I don't do nearly enough tunisian work but I love it so much
I do have one of those! But no. Here it is: Amazon link
I forgot, it was actually for wrinkle reduction, lol? Which I literally don’t understand at all, a pillow is not gonna save you from your boobs sagging due to time and/or age, but ok lol. That’s not what I use it for so idc.
Really hope this is helpful to you!
I think it started at about the 24 hour mark. He didn't technically qualify as colic, but he got pretty close sometimes. It stopped around ... I think 4 or 5 months. I don't exactly remember. He's 10 months now and last I heard him shriek like that was when he got the first flu vaccine a few months ago. Made him feel right icky. We are pretty sure he had some kind of digestive distress because he farted all the time and stuff like bicycling his legs would help more often than not. The gas drops kind of worked, but it also gave him explosive poops. He also would shriek right before he pooped for a while there. I distinctly remember nights of him shrieking while one of us just cuddled him, rocked him, or walked around the table holding him. On the bad nights, we would trade off cuz half an hour was a bit frazzling.
But he also just loves to be loud. He yells when he's upset, he yells when he's excited, he yells when he's bored. He's just got some lungs, and he's a passionate little fellow. I also have a loud laugh and not the best volume control when I'm excited, so we think he's picking at least a little of it up from me.
Overmuffs are cheap (work gave something like the linked set to me for free), and I feel it's better to have them and not need them than to need them and not have them.
I feel like a shill posting this but this is what I used. It says not 100% guaranteed but it definitely helped us loads. Especially after our neighbours moved out! I also hired a cleaner to deep clean out all my cupboards for £30 as I couldn't be bothered to do it myself and suspected some roaches may be hiding there.
https://www.amazon.co.uk/Pest-Tech-Gel-Cockroach-20g/dp/B00IJBP1HE/ref=mp_s_a_1_2_sspa?keywords=Roach+Gel&qid=1649515761&sr=8-2-spons&psc=1&spLa=ZW5jcnlwdGVkUXVhbGlmaWVyPUFNTkRPQUVFREMxWTAmZW5jcnlwdGVkSWQ9QTA3NTE2NTEzVTc1S1JUUzVCVD... Do read the reviews to see if it's right for you. It helped a TON with me.
Similar thing happened at my previous apartment. People downstairs were not hoarders, but had just abandoned the place with food there. Not sure how long they had been gone by the time we first saw a roach.
This stuff saved us. Turns out roaches eat their dead, and this stuff will kill one, then kill the one that eats him, and then kill the one that eats that guy. Fortunately we caught it early.
Probably paned glass window privacy film.
| Joey for Reddit | 2.0.5.2 (438) |
|---|---|
| Android | 12 (31) |
| Phone | samsung/SM-G973F/beyond1/beyond1ltexx |
| RAM | 7.25 GB |
I have a lot of trouble waking up too, so I may go a bit overboard, but on the off chance something helps, here’s my method:
- Melatonin at night so my body isn’t still producing it in the morning (I have Delayed Sleep Phase Syndrome so this is a must). I also do a bunch of relaxation stuff at bedtime since I have trouble winding down.
- Sunrise alarm clock, the fancier one that changes colors as the light increases to simulate sunrise. The sunrise function takes 30 minutes, so I set one alarm for 45 minutes before I need to get up to give myself an alarm to turn off, and one for 15 minutes before I need to get up to give myself some leeway. I also use the sunset function at night while I’m doing stretches or reading a book.
- Blackout curtains on the window - sunrise alarm clock doesn’t work properly without them.
- Sleep tracking app on my phone that has an alarm function that supposedly wakes you up during light sleep. I use one called Pillow but there are better ones if you have a smartwatch.
- If I really need to be up at a specific time, a loud alarm clock on the other side of my room. If my wake-up time is more flexible, I’ll usually use an alarm or two on my phone; it’s nearly impossible to turn off 3-4 alarms going off at the same time and that forces me to wake up.
Here. Use this…
Limited-time deal: CASOFU Burritos Blanket, Double Sided Giant Flour Tortilla Throw Blanket, Novelty Tortilla Blanket for Your Family, 285 GSM Soft and Comfortable Flannel Taco Blanket for Adults. (Beige, 71 inches) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07R1TPZYH/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_dl_6DKC1HVNXWPE6FB8T09Z?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
Read the book The Gift of Fear. It will give you enough confidence to be able to get out of sketchy situations and why and how men use the social pressures to be able to coerce women to get them somewhere to rape or kill them. If you're able to identify why an interaction is wrong and that the person is setting off red flags, you'll be more aggressive about getting out of it. https://www.amazon.com/Gift-Fear-Gavin-Becker/dp/0316235776
Diamonds are easy with a small investment. You press this thing into it to test the hardness. It's not perfect but it's good enough to tell you if you're getting a deal at the local goodwill
Here is an example one like (not the same but similar to) the one I bring to flea market and GoodWill. I don't go looking for things to flip but I'm not beyond it either.
[Upgraded] High Accuracy Diamond Tester Professional Jeweler for Novice and Expert - Diamond Selector II 9V Battery Included(Black Diamond Testers) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06Y2MT175/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_W48JN3FQJQF7VSV9KYGC?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
A little bit of everything. In makeup bags, pencil bags, little pill ziploc bags, whatever is suited for it and will fit in my bag.
Here’s the link for the paper! My new obsession. Got my husband hooked on them, too. I have horrible memory problems, thanks fucked up body, and lists and post it’s are my friends. Did you know about THESE?! Extreme Post its
PetSafe Simply Clean is a little easier on the wallet than the other options. I have two. PetSafe customer support is excellent if you have a problem.
I have both a litter robot and a catgenie. I like the cat genie better, but it’s definitely more of an investment in space and plumbing. Plus it’s pretty loud. That being said, it washes the freaking litter and you can’t beat that. For those who don’t have the budget to blow hundreds in litter boxes there’s a box called Omega Paw Roll n Clean which is like $40. I have 3 of them. Super low tech but it’s amazing and makes litter boxes so much easier. You just roll it and it separates all the clumps from the fresh litter, then you pull the drawer out, dump it and you’re done.
I’ve never read 50 Shades of Grey but I did find this parody that I bought solely off the description on the back (you can read the back off the image here)
This one is pricy but maybe you can find a good Black Friday deal somewhere?
Brookstone 4-in-1 Bed Wedge Pillow https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N5GA59X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_F45TNMKM8ZE6XC3JY7BR
I’m cracking up about your bellybutton being your kids lovies! I don’t know how you handled that hahaha.
I’ve been a nanny to many small children over the past 15 years. I absolutely get “touched out” regularly. I love snuggles, but after 8-10 hours of cuddling, holding, and being climbed on, I am done. I don’t get physically sick like OOP, but sometimes I want to push the kid off me so I can have body space for a little while. I do NOT push them off! But i have moments when I want to.
It’s easier when the kids are a little older and I can say “I love you so much and I love cuddling with you! Right now I need a little break from touching. Give me one more biiiiggg hug and let’s XYZ”. I’ll also give an example of times they didn’t want to be touched and how I respected that. It’s a good lesson in consent.
I recently discovered this book Let's Talk About Body Boundaries, Consent and Respect. It’s great, I highly recommend it.