What are /r/FTMOver30's favorite Products & Services?

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Usually ye old Jansport Superbreak in black I bought in my 20s (mine doesn't have a waterbottle pocket though, I just use a carabiner clip on one of the straps), which I bought as my 'work bag' when I needed an inconspicuous bag for city commute (subway/T/bus) life. Inexpensive and at least within wear and tear reasons have a lifetime warranty.

My other excuse is that when I need to bring a lot of stuff, usually a sketchbook is in there which NEVER fit into small bags. 'Oh yeah, there's art supplies in here' usually shuts people up ;)

Also have a bigger one with a laptop sleeve that has flamingos on it when I'm feeling a tad bit more flairy lol

Your friend reminded me of Lost Boi a queer retelling of Peter Pan where Tinker bell is a pidgin and Neverland is a abandoned warehouse.

The trick is to go through the irritating rigamarole of trying on a million suits that don't fit correctly until you find one that does. Then note the brand and always go right for that brand. For me it's calvin klein and kenneth cole. I've got a slim boyish figure and these work for me. For you I'd try some of the suit styles that market to Asian men, who tend to be shorter and slimmer. Some of the ones on amazon are even pretty affordable: MOGU Mens One Button Suits 3 Piece Suit US Size 30(Tag Asian Size S) Light Gray https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01EL3KDW6/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_FZlFzbWVM21XA

When buying a suit the most important fit is the shoulders. You want a jacket that fits your shoulders. Everything else can easily be tailored. Waist of the jacket, length of sleeves and trousers, etc. It's a big outlay of funds in the beginning for a trans guy to buy a suit, and that sucks, but it's worth it to get one every other year or so IMHO. And sometimes you get lucky and find sales or the perfect thing at a second hand store. Macy's does a BOGO suit sale every year. I love suit shopping at Macy's even though it does tend to be spendy. Maybe try going in at like 10am on a Tuesday or something and telling the sales associate you are trying to figure out how to find a good fit. There are a few guys at my local Macy's who know I'm trans and love geeking out about suits with me. It's worth it to find those guys at whatever store you choose and find out when they're on shift to go shopping.

Anyway, for a starter suit I recommend looking into Asian brands on Amazon and checking out suit separates at H&M. When you're ready to upgrade to something really nice, hit your local Macys at a nonbusy time and forge an alliance with the sales people and they will get you hooked up :)

(And if you live in the Maryland area, let's go suit shopping!)

I don't want to make too many assumptions based on this thread and your post history, but if you're talking about Utah, if you're driving distance to SLC there are a number of good resources there. Whether you're describing there, or somewhere else entirely, contacting the nearest university's LGBTQ resource center (or the nearest standalone LGBTQ center) could be a way to find therapists, etc. that aren't easily found online. Once you get a foot into the community you can usually find good therapists through word of mouth.

If you are in Utah (no need to tell us if you don't want to), I'd also suggest Meetup.com to find LGBTQ groups that can help you with that foot in the door, since resources might still be underground enough to make them hard to find on Google. But with increased trans visibility the past 5-ish years, maybe things have changed and resources might be easier to find.

NGL, I literally used these and attached them to the binder and to the waist of my pants. Felt kinda stupid at first but I had a problem with the binder rolling up even when I wasnt sitting

I thought it was all hog wash, so didn't use anything after my top surgery, but when my wife when through her transition I started looking things up, and settled on this product: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B00ZF76K7K/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1

We noticed a big difference in where my wife put it, and didn't put it. The tape was expensive so she thought she'd only put it on the darker spots, and those spots faded, leaving everywhere else dark, but not she's applying it everywhere. If I had thought it would make that big a difference, I would have done it myself.

Hi friend, you’re saying it’s because you get very sweaty in the skin folds right? I’m a nurse and we use this type of dressing to absorb moisture called interdry, it’s very useful for these situations. The one I linked is a single 30in sheet you can cut to however you’d like. It should be washable as well so you can reuse, I know what I linked it expensive but it does truly help with the moisture. Best of luck and I hope you get some relief

A locking fireproof box, sorta like this https://smile.amazon.com/SentrySafe-1200-Fireproof-Lock-Cubic/dp/B008HZUI1G/

I keep it high up in my closet, but I like that it locks so my kids can't get into it if it's somehow within reach.

Yo dudes, my skin gets blackheads mostly that get out of control vs deep cystic acne, so idk if this works for everyone, but those exfoliating gloves 🧤 work really well for me. I use them on almost my entire body and have noticeably reduced the amount of zits I get anywhere.

Like these: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08C5KLYGV/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_i_FH23VZJTMZQSKNJ0ET0Q

I have an 11 year old daughter.

If the way you articulated it to her is as you wrote it in this post that could be part of the issue. You put all of the emphasis on wanting to look different rather than articulating how you feel and why you plan to transition. Right now it's possible that her understanding of your transition is that mom wants to look like a man rather than mom is a man.

I recently had my daughter read a wonderful book that covers issues she will soon be facing in puberty - including an extensive chapter on sexuality and gender. LGBTQ issues are not new to her, they are something we have discussed with her from a very young age. Highly recommend, by the way.

When we were discussing transgender people after she read that chapter, I told her that our friend Alice is transgender, which I assume my daughter already knew as she has met Alice many times. For context: Alice is a transgender woman who is very early in her transition. Her response: REALLY?!

It never occurred to my kid that Alice was trans because kids of that age don't notice nuance like this unless they are taught to (usually by parents who are prejudiced). It is entirely possible that your child likewise does not really see or understand your transgender family members to be transgender.

(Adding because it's adorable: That REALLY?! was followed by THAT'S SO COOL!)

If I'm off the mark and you think your child has enough of an understanding of transgender issues to understand the nuance in the conversation that you had, then I agree with the other comments. It might just be a hard adjustment for her since it is her own parent. It might also bring up gender questions of her own since it is her formerly same-gendered parent who is transitioning.

I hope none of this comes across as criticism. You're doing great as a parent an a human.

https://www.amazon.com/Urination-Silicone-Portable-Standing-Activities/dp/B088M5TRDB/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=3H1HYYLP9KOMW&keywords=stand+to+pee&qid=1642043544&sprefix=Stand+to+pee%2Caps%2C155&sr=8-3

This looks promising.

I got these (https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B01N7GO1X4/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_HNXGRFDQDFAYCWSZDRGP?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1) and sewed (by hand) a length of hoodie cord across the place where the balls go to keep the packer (med Mr Limpy) in place. Super comfortable boxer briefs and they do the job. Bonus, they are much cheaper than traditional packing underwear.

Differin is exceptional, my dermatologist recommends it to me for my entire face. It dries your skin out like crazy (as I see you've noted in your comment), this stuff was recommended on one of the skincare subs and it was a gamechanger for me re: the dryness that resulted from Differin. Highly recommend for treatment-caused dryness.

I have a similar mother. It took me years to realise nothing I could do would make her change. My therapist recommended this book and it really helped: Adult children of emotionally immature parents.

I came out to my sister, but decided not to come out to my parents. In truth, I was already communicating with them much less when I discovered I was trans…after that I realised how heavily gendered my mother had made my life from 12yo and all her manipulative tactics to try to make me perform female. I’m now happy with the level of interaction that I have with them and it’s greatly reduced my stress and upset.

i'm sorry that you're going through this :(

i wanted to comment on your concerns about working out.

regarding the gym, there are lots of ways you can work out at home, even without any equipment. check out /r/bodyweightfitness to get started. you can also buy resistance bands which can easily take the place of dumbbells and can be used almost anywhere. here is an example https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B086X4PN48/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o06_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

there are lots of youtube videos that show you how to use resistance bands. here is an example. https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCAaGx-JzrQuQ3FQ-1W_fFvg

regarding the fibromyalgia, i understand how difficult it is to work out while in pain. i have experience with this too. the only thing i can say to this is just try to work out a little bit each day and don't overdo it. remember that a 5 or 10 minute work out each day is still better than no work out at all.

I have this one but it took me several weeks of practice before I could use it consistently. This one is much easier to pee with (not to mention cheaper) but it's pretty stiff so packing with it is probably tricky.

Yes, I ordered these: they work. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08H8KMGTG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_glt_fabc_VDCR4NMT97AHZEZR119X?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1

Edit: I also ordered needles if you need that info too.

This is what I have and I like it: https://www.amazon.com/Philips-Norelco-Trimmer-BT3210-41-dp-B078G9FJDK/dp/B078G9FJDK/ref=dp_ob_title_hpc

Hey I haven’t had top surgery before, but I’ve had some other surgeries so I can offer you general advice for that. Something that I haven’t seen here is having timers for your meds. It will definitely help you if you get some pill bottles that have a timer on the top which show when you last opened them. Kind of like this. https://www.amazon.com/Automatically-Records-Indicator-Auto-Repeating-Included/dp/B004W8EQC4/ref=rtpb_6?pd_rd_w=k6ihA&pf_rd_p=be844577-fee7-4bbc-8dda-083e56cc6f0d&pf_rd_r=PEY92SW92Z66JTYA5K2V&pd_rd_r=ea6f549b-a881-4cce-8c87-71f9eed4859...

I am in a LTR, so my partner helped me with meals and things for the most part. I also bought a butt wiper to use in the bathroom, and a grabber tool similar to this to use when I dropped something and didn't want to disturb my partner while he was working in his home office. It also helped me get light weight things from shelves. I had a bidet bottle, but after my surgery, it hurt to fill it and the maneuver it enough to be useful.

Do NOT get the grabbers that fold in the middle, as that fold can break!

Yeah I’ve been at an episcopal church for a while now. Honestly I started going after a long period away from religion because I wanted to regardless of whether I have faith or not heal some of the ways the church hurt me and I think this was part of that drive even though I didn’t acknowledge it at the time. I recently stumbled across this book thought you might be interested if you haven’t read it already. https://www.amazon.com/Transforming-Bible-Lives-Transgender-Christians/dp/0664263100

This baby gets nose hair, under-nose hair (which I have a hard time shaving), ear hair, does a good dry, close shave, and also has attachments for beard trimming.
I primarily use it to keep my neckbeard shaved on any day I leave the house. I let my facial hair grow out under my mask for about a week, and then trim it with the electric razor before a nice close straight razor shave.

KT tape comes in a variety of forms. The brand KT has wide, stretch, extra strength, etc, so just avoid the stretch.

Here's what I buy: Therapist's Choice® Kinesiology Tape, 2"x105' PRE-CUT Bulk Roll (BEIGE), PRE-CUT into easy-to-apply 10 inch strips. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B00DSST6W4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_9fZyDbYSRVP5T

Hey, agirlnamedJared, I found this and plan to attach it to the side of the monitor in my classroom. The students I work with and my co-workers refer to me by my last name or a non-gendered shortened version of my birth name.... https://www.amazon.com/Agender-Neutral-Pronouns-Embroidered-Applique/dp/B06XRJC1LB/ref=sr_1_23?ie=UTF8&qid=1543867044&sr=8-23&keywords=they%2Fthem+pronoun+patch