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Nonverbal communication can mean different things depending on the situation. I recommend more research. That helps my anxiety.

However, I have to say that a hostile family environment is what caused my anxiety, and if it's the same for you I recommend therapy as the solution if you can. Or find good books on Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (I'm reading 7 week CBT https://www.amazon.com/dp/1623157803/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_imm_t1_ix53FbWGQHG9B).

What I've learned from my mother (who had an even worse family) is that a lot of the toxicity she grew up with is not the norm. Her family says things and mean absolute poison, but other people can use the same phrases or nonverbal movements and not have the vitriol behind it. You might never be comfortable with the movements, but take a deep breath and analyze each situation before you (over?) react. I also find that remaining calm and open when people explode in anger can not only defuse the situation, but also leaves me feeling better than when I get angry too. Just don't stonewall if you care about the relationship (look up Gottman's 4 horsemen).

Benoit's excellent Accounts, Excuses, and Apologies goes into a full chapter on interpersonal image repair, but for the sake of simplification, if you wish to repair your image, you have five basic strategies:

Denial: I didn't do what you're claiming I did.

Evasion of Responsibility: It's not my fault that it happened.

Reducing offensiveness: It really wasn't that bad.

Corrective action: Here, let me make it up to you.

Mortification: I regret my actions and I apologize.

There are subcategories to those (and 30 seconds looking on libgen.is will get you a pdf if you're really interested), but your choice in strategies depends a lot on the relationship between the parties, and what they would like that relationship to be in the future.

In this case, I highly recommend mortification, maybe with corrective action (e.g., offer to pay to get the carpet steam cleaned).

A good apology has a lot of components, but you could try to fit the template of: I'm so sorry for [insert fuckup here]. I feel [insert negative emotion here] about it. [Distinguish from actual self] [modification of future behavior].

Example: I'm so sorry for being that out-of-control drunk last weekend. I feel horrible about the way I acted. I know those actions don't represent who I really am, and I'm never going to act that way again.

Sorry for the essay, I've read and written a lot about this topic.

General advice for getting into comms:

• Get a dual degree in journalism (so you can actually write) and something else (political science, drama, english literature, graphic design). OR buy yourself a copy of The Elements of Style and get a degree in whatever you want to.
• Develop a technical hobby or two - whether it is videography, graphic design, or coding. These skills are invaluable to employers and provide you with a leg-up. Anybody can use Photoshop, so maybe do something else.
• Get on social media. Start building a brand.
• Do communications internships and apply your hobby skills to make valuable contributions during those periods. I hire based on what a person has done, and whether they seem open to both learning more from me and teaching themselves how to do what needs to be done – not what degree they got.
• Get ready to start at the bottom doing some real drudge work... that's just the way this stuff works – especially in communications, which tends to be pretty intensely hierarchical.

General Advice for YOU There are a ton of ways to "help the environment" and it sounds as though (and I could be wrong) you've just began to scratch the surface in that regard. Yes, you could work comms for an organization, but based upon your self-identification as INFJ, I'd recommend you look at advocacy work.

You could work at WRI, Nature Conservancy, NRDC, or even better – a local Public Interest Research Group and I'm guessing you'd get even more joy out of that than a communications position, which at lower levels tend to be focused purely on supporting programmatic goals.

First line is assertive, the second one I don't know. I'm not sure if I should categorize it to passive-aggressive or not because the context is unclear. Especially the part "If I don't hear from you...". I'm leaning to passive aggressive though. The third line is aggressive. This is what I based it on.

https://www.startpage.com/av/proxy-image?piurl=https%3A%2F%2Fencrypted-tbn0.gstatic.com%2Fimages%3Fq%3Dtbn%3AANd9GcRnVy0TEkqLxOc9KXLtf_Js4g3rZRKHLTaSMTHoKHOSUCOPCc0L%26s&sp=1611217745T1b7b1d425076c458f1875649f3667e0a604b9b52f0922dcc5ca360af49312fdd

I know the feeling and it sucks. My dad is reading this book to help in his line of work and he gave me some protips from it that I have yet to try:

The Power of Strangers: The Benefits of Connecting in a Suspicious World https://www.amazon.com/dp/1984855778/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_BB6413AJ13DHXR0SPPS6

One was to phrase "how are you?" as "on a scale of 1-10, how's your day going so far?"

This makes them think and give a number. They might ask you the same thing back.

If it's not 10, you can ask "what would have to happen to move your day from X to a 10?"

More open ended questions while still being polite and unintrusive. Maybe there are some more good pointers in that book, but idk from experience.

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