What are /r/etiquette's favorite Products & Services?

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I highly recommend the queen of etiquette: Emily Post’s Etiquette book. It’s more of a reference guide, but it provides all of the must-knows for every sort of occasion.

Agreed. We would need way more information.

You might come to find out that there is indeed a variety of wealth levels in the room- and you are not in the upper echelon.

Money talk varies widely among cultures as far as what is appropriate and in good taste. Here is a good, albeit older, article about money.

If it’s a social or family function, I would think a vague comment (if the topic absolutely must be broached) about how you’ve been lucky/blessed or your employer has been good to you before redirecting the topic.

If this comes up in a professional setting, I think you can be more explicit. In a job interview, for example, this must be discussed. In a conversation with a coworker, it could be appropriate to speak about what career development you’ve undertaken to increase your value to the company or improve your professional skills. This should also be done vaguely and without numbers attached (percentages could be acceptable).

If this is in a romantic setting- of course the topic must come up eventually. I would suggest well into the relationship, and accompanying a conversation about values and budgetary priorities. The other person can certainly tell the standard of living you expect without you having to say a word.

I will caution that if you bring up a fraught topic like money, expect some equally awkward questions. People may feel entitled to probe further. Or you may be solicited for donations and favors for the foreseeable future.

I completely agree. Here's a link to a book that's been in my own coffee table stack for years. (I absolutely love it when I excuse myself to fetch refreshments and come back to find a guest perusing this one!)

https://www.amazon.com/dp/0446696773/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_tmjlFbG0VVE26

There is no simple answer to give.

You should know when the time is appropriate to speak and to keep silent. That doesn't necessarily mean that you have to be very talkative. Pick up any newer book by Emily Post Institute, Etiquette (by Peggy Post) 18th is the latest. There's also Essential Manners for Men written by Peter Post. What's written in those books is your bare minimum for communication and should be fine with anyone who is himself/herself mannered.

If you want to instead make a good impression, pick up a Dale Carnegie book How To Win Friends and Influence People for reference. Also there is a (mostly) rewritten variant by his associates - How To Win Friends and Influence People in the Digital Age. As the name implies, it may be more applicable. I've just briefly glanced over some topics in the latter. But I'm confident it's just as good.

Hey OP, just wanted to say you rock for being a stable home for this girl during such a chaotic time! Have you checked out this book? Maybe you can casually mention that the book really helped you at that age, or a friend recommended it? Maybe with everything going on in her home she hasn’t been taught proper hygiene methods. Regardless (like others have mentioned) CPS should definitely hear about what’s going on. Even if they can’t do anything, it’ll start a paper trail in case things get worse so proper action can hopefully be taken quicker. Again, you’re a super incredible person for taking the initiative and caring enough to step in and help out. Best of luck!

For those people who feel uncomfortable removing their shoes in your home, maybe you could request that they use shoe covers?

https://www.amazon.com/dp/B011EBS0L4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_roZgFbQ0MYBM3

You’re very welcome. Once you’re done with Emily Post, have fun with The Butler’s Guide to Running the Home and Other Graces by Stanley Ager, a real butler trained in real Edwardian-style service.

Oh, I live in Germany where it is rude to wear shoes in a private home. Normally, for smaller gatherings you would have something called "house shoes" that guests could wear indoors. In bigger ones you just see rows of shoes in the entrance of the person. I guess people are used to it (and make sure they never wear socks with holes hehe!).

In other more formal places you get these kind of things, but yes I think this would kill the mood of your gathering: https://www.amazon.com/Pairs%EF%BC%89Shoe-Disposable-Convenience-Recyclable-Waterproof/dp/B08L4868K4/ref=mp_s_a_1_5?keywords=shoe+covers&qid=1665598631&qu=eyJxc2MiOiI2LjI5IiwicXNhIjoiNS4yOCIsInFzcCI6IjUuMDIifQ%3D%3D&sr=8-5

I guess if you live in a place where it is completely abnormal to take off your shoes, you may catch some people off guard and maybe embarrass them? I agree with the heads up if you are close enough to these people, else could you make the carpet area off-limits?

Baby specific places tend to cost more so the new mom will get more bang for her buck with amazon. $100 for Amazon would have paid for at least 3 months of diapers for twins in my house.

If you can, could you also buy this book for them? I give that book (or it's twin equivalent) to every new parent I know. It's a very easy read and easily the best book for helping get health sleep habits early.

This one made me laugh and it comically spot on to grasp one if the most extreme, Western values wise, countries on Earth: https://www.amazon.com/Xenophobes-Guide-Swedes-Peter-Berlin/dp/1906042497 (Amazon is evil but it shops everywhere)

I’m a fan of this one, it covers a number of bases (probably available in places other than Amazon if you want to shop elsewhere, this is just the first link that came up): https://www.amazon.com/BIFF-Responses-Conflict-Personal-Meltdowns/dp/1936268353

I just got married last June, and I highly recommend The Wedding Book by Mindy Weiss. Great coverage of everything to do with planning a wedding, including any etiquette questions you might have.

https://www.amazon.com/Manners-Guide-Surprisingly-Dignified-Wedding/dp/0393069141/ref=nodl_

This book was very helpful to me.

The keys to a great wedding are good food, good music, an open bar, greeting and interacting with your guests and being gracious hosts. If you plan your wedding keeping your guests comfort and enjoyment in mind, you’ll be fine.

My favourite baby gift to give is a copy of this very famous birthday cake book in my country. Every Gen X and older Millenial’s mum made cakes out of this book and it is a great nostalgia gift as well as being really useful. I got a vintage copy when my first daughter was born but they reissued it a couple of years later, so now I buy the new version. Since your boyfriend is a chef maybe something like that? Or a kids cook book? Babies become toddlers super quickly and they all love to cook with their parents Birthday Cake Book

Reading this post and your responses to other comments, I think you need to read The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a F**K.

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Seems that you're definitely harbouring some resentment towards this guy and lacking the assertiveness to just say 'no' to hosting him when you don't want to. You don't owe them any excuses for why they can't stay with you, just like you don't owe them accommodation or dinner simply because they happen to be passing through your neck of the woods.

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Personally I'd just rip the proverbial band-aid off and tell them that I've had a change of plan / heart and that the visit isn't going to work out. If this person is disappointed, so what?

I read <em>Classy</em> by Derek Blasberg and helped me learn a lot about what it means to be kind and gracious. I love my parens and wouldn't change them for the world, but they both sort of crass and surly people (with hearts of gold).

It was basic etiquette on top of how to be charming (without being fake). There are a few iterations of the book. I only know the first, but I assume it only got more up to date?

Please do not call CPS. That’s pouring gas on an already stressful situation.

The parents need a copy of 1-2-3 Magic.

I keep one of these in my purse. They are awesome!

Foldable Purse Hook Floding Handbag Hanger Bling Rhinestone Bag Holder for Table Desk 1 PCS White https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08VHZFPQB/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_GTBPQW1VJ6B6DBV55ZT0

I know women that carry a purse hook in their purse. Seems to work pretty well.

https://www.amazon.ca/kwmobile-Purse-Hooks-Table-Handbag/dp/B08GC3C8F2/ref=sr_1_10?dchild=1&amp;keywords=purse+hooks+for+table&amp;qid=1635775328&amp;sr=8-10

It depends entirely on context. The Life Changing Magic of Not Giving a Fuck was a surprisingly good read that really helped me to change my way of saying 'no' to stuff.

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A lot of the time you'll either find yourself feeling pressured into saying 'yes' to stuff that you don't really want to do, or saying 'no' but accompanying it with an elaborate story about why you're saying no to whatever it is.

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"No." by itself can be blunt - and I tend to reserve that only to people who infringe on my time / space. Door to door salesmen, political campaigners, JW's, charity workers, activists, etc... the type of people who'll interrupt you from minding your own business to try and pitch something to you, they're the ones who get a swift "Nope." from me. You don't need to explain or justify or apologise for not wanting to sign up to whatever they're trying to recruit you into.

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Otherwise if it's people I know personally then etiquette would dictate that a more sympethetic "sorry, I can't / busy that day / not into that / etc" would be a bit more appropriate, usually accompanied with a "how about X instead?" type of response.

Maybe a Kufi? they're associated with Arab/Muslim culture but they're not religious headwear, and so it wouldn't be inappropriate to wear. Because of it's slimline and full cover, it could work. I've seen plenty wear them indoors, and at formal events, so I think it would be a good option.

I didn't mean they'd lose their profane status but that it's not abnormal to read profane words on public forums on the internet. Etiquette by nature has to adjust. There's a great book by Charles Purdy called &quot;Urban Etiquette&quot; that discusses how attitudes and manners change with society.

Hold onto you pocketbook!!...

Say it with Royal Doulton's Bunnykins 3-Piece Children's Set ($40)

and/or

a tasteful Lunt Sterling Silver Beaded Edge Feeding Spoon ($100)

Oh I also have * How To Be a Man

Which is a great read.

Np, weddings do bring out the nutty when the people that love us most are involved.

Btw, I don't know if you're familiar with this, but Conscious Bride's Wedding Planner had a tonne of information to help with all the 'unsaid stuff' regarding weddings, as well as being excellent functioning planner/agenda. I heard the companion book may be too spiritual/wishy-washy for some, but the planner really helped me get my wedding focus on. Perhaps worth checking out - even if you do one of those vegas style chapels :D Congrats again!