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Would you consider seeing a professional? Like a Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, in order to fully understand what's normal 24-year old sex drive and practices, and what might be problematic thinking and behavior that would lead to addiction or other ruin?

I personally benefitted from Dr. Ralph Earle's book Lonely All The Time - very helpful to help me understand why, no matter how good my personal relationships, it was never enough. You might also benefit from the community at r/SEXAA - lots of people struggling with the same questions as you.

Hope you get things sorted out and put these worries behind you.

Your story is not too far off from mine. I've been with my wife for the past 9 years and also have watched it dissolve with my sexual addiction. There is plenty of denial I'm sure you have like me with catching my wife cheating on me before I did, but rationalizing this addiction will never get you better. I turned 31 in July and around that time she discovered sites like AdultFriendFinder and AshleyMaddison I belonged to from the past. I then got into a sexual addiction program that uses the Patrick Carnes book which I am currently working. Still have to start going to sexaholics anonymous meetings. I would highly suggest to just start listening to some recorded meetings to get the idea of lusting being the main cause for this addiction. The stories that are told and insight is the driving force to the start of understanding what is really going on. Feel free to message me if you want to talk more about it!

In my experience the meetings are the best part of SAA. These kinds of meetings also helped war veterans get over their PTSD and later became part of traditional therapy.

Consider using a timed lockbox. I also added a data plan to my apple watch so I can leave the house without my phone but still have basic functionality with me (texts, calls, credit cards, maps, etc.).

Tools like this are all useful but there is no silver bullet (at least I haven't found one yet). IMHO the most effective tool has been another person — consider "bookending" time where you might be most at risk of going back into unwanted behaviors.

https://www.amazon.com/Sex-Addiction-Workbook-Strategies-Harbinger/dp/1572243767

That's the one. It was written by a team that specialized in rehabilitating sex offenders, but "toned it down" to help with sex addiction. It was very much a "what's going on with my body?" book for puberty, but y'know aimed at sex addicts with decades of acting out.

I remember reading the chapter on cognitive dissonance and it was SO illuminating.

There are 17 different types of cognitive dissonance, but they're essentially lies we tell ourselves. Any one can be dismissed, but my addict brain wants to act out, so it lets them build, and they start weaving together. Now I have this intense 17 item braid train of thought going on and I'd be a fool NOT to act out.

like... I've had a rough day at work (rationale), my wife is out with friends (opportunity), we haven't had sex in awhile (justification)... those three, all true, none are a lie, and I haven't even done anything wrong... but you get where it's going... add in 14 more and yeah.

Really helpful book.

Thanks for sharing. A lot of my past illicit or destructive sexual behavior comes from my extreme need to control situations and their outcomes. That extreme need to control stems from a loss of control very early on in my childhood when I was coerced into sexual behavior before I could understand what was happening. I often strongly disliked the people I would seek out for acting out with, and hated myself for doing it, but kept doing it because it was another "chance" at correcting what happening in childhood. It turned out all I was really doing was getting nowhere inside myself and perpetuating a cycle of neglect and abuse by using these people to make myself feel bad, because I felt that I did not deserve to feel anything good. Anytime I did feel something good, someone would rip it away from me. I eventually began to believe it was not for me and that I was not allowed to have healthy or good things in my life. This was just another way of keeping myself safe and protecting myself emotionally, which is ironic because by engaging in this behavior I was being physically unsafe.

This book helped me early on, in fact I need to re-read it. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B097KKYXGD/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1

Hi. it takes courage to break free from addictions but trust me, you are not at the end of the road because there's solution for every challenge.

TRY DISTRACTION There are a number of things you can try to distract yourself. Listed below are some common techniques like 1. Call or write a letter to a good friend or family member. 2. Count backward from a large number by sevens or some other number (for example, 756, 749, 42, 735, etc.). 3. Do some chores, such as cleaning the house, doing laundry, or washing dishes. 4. Do something creative. Draw a picture or build a model. 5. Exercise. 6. Focus your attention on your environment. Name all the colors in the room. Try to memorize and recall all the objects that you see in a room. • Read a good book >> https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VX1RPMK or watch a funny movie. • Take part in a fun and challenging game that requires some level of attention, such as a crossword puzzle or Sudoku. Note that you can create your own distractions. Discover those things that works for you, make a list of them, and put them to practice. Practicing those feels like acting at first but overtime, it becomes part of your routine.

The link I shared is a free book on amazon. There are insightful tips you can benefit from. >> https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VX1RPMK

It is crucial that you be able to understand your own behavior and what drives you in order to break these destructive patterns. We should realize that there is something in your inherent "programming" that is acting according to the belief that you should continue these sexual acts even to your own detriment. If you are fantasizing about things that you do not want before, during, or after the act, the place that you really need to start with is your brain. How did you become programmed/conditioned to do these thing. Some tips that can help are

Stay away from people and places that trigger addictive behavior. Avoid the places where you have sought harmful sexual encounters in the past. Stay away from red light districts and try not to visit sex shops. If your friends want to go out in these areas, ask them to go somewhere else with you.

Remove contact information of sexual partners. Delete numbers and names of former sexual partners from your phone, computer, and any other devices. Having a list of people willing to have sex could be tempting when you crave sex. Notify regular partners that you will no longer be seeking relations with them. I hope my tip helps though? You can check out more helpful tips from a book written by a friend and its free on amazon. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VX1RPMK

Hi. the truth is you are not the only one in this situation trust me on that. alot of people are but they have kept it secret and the truth is the only way you can be free from any addiction is to voice out and ask for help which is the right thing you have done.

ill like to recommend a very insightful book on Sexual Addiction. It is free on amazon. it could could help. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09VX1RPMK

I can’t suggest this workbook enough - The Mindful Self-Compassion... https://www.amazon.com/dp/1462526780?ref=ppx_pop_mob_ap_share

Self compassion is what you need and will he vital in your recovery process. A large part of acting out is to compensate for the void we have within ourselves that is there because we don’t love ourself completely. Please look into it 👍🏽

Hi, while this is a tough situation it's great that you're admitting that you have a problem. That's the first step to recovery.

One of the reasons you might be finding it so difficult to distract yourself from thoughts about sex is because we're constantly surrounded by porn in some form or the other everywhere. Triggers are placed all over the internet to lure you in.

So, what I'd suggest is you take some time off the internet and social media sites, If you need to access the internet, download a porn blocker like BlockerX, that should help you out!

Hi, while this is a tough situation it's great that you're admitting that you have a problem. That's the first step to recovery.

One of the reasons you might be finding it so difficult to distract yourself from thoughts about sex is because we're constantly surrounded by porn in some form or the other everywhere. Triggers are placed all over the internet to lure you in.

So, what I'd suggest is you take some time off the internet and social media sites, If you need to access the internet, download a porn blocker like BlockerX, that should help you out!

One more thing. https://www.amazon.com/Breaking-Free-Understanding-Addiction-Healing/dp/0830817913 This book is very accurate and true for the addict, like myself. I would also recommend if you can, find a Christian based counselor. I found a great one and we cover one chapter of this book every week. Been going weekly for a few months now. Now......I really, really, really do not like this book. About half way through the book my counselor asked me if I know why I don't like this book. said he does..I said please do tell...he told me it's about you. I just stared at him and started crying. It was a real eye opener, never realized it till he said that. It was a real blow to me, he was right. Stare at yourself in a mirror, talk about all your failings, addictions, habits that aren't health, people you hurt, problems in your life you've created, the lies you told and the list goes on and on. I know now that I must my face my demons and problems head on and not make excuses or shug them off any more. This book will help you do that. Now, that being said, I still don't like the book, but I am very glad that we are going through it and wouldn't swap it out for any other book. It too has been a life changer. Hope this helps...

Great book I also recommend the sex addiction 101 workbook it is not as large and intimidating and I apreciate Robert Weis' perspective . https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01HBYNWXY/ref=cm_sw_su_dp

There's a great book written by Paula Hall. https://www.amazon.ca/Understanding-Treating-Sex-Addiction-comprehensive/dp/0415691915

It helped me to learn about the addiction cycle and has so much more valuable information.

Self care is incredibly important. Exercise, quality sleep, healthy diet have been essential for me. Daily mindfulness meditation has also been super helpful in more subtle ways.