One thing you can do, is work on other parts of your voice. Pitch or how low/high your voice sounds is only 1 part of how you sound. Try warming up your voice by doing some vocal exercises. I've worked in a call center for 4 years and did choir for 8 years in hs & college. Warming up can help stretch your vocal range and make you sound better. Proper breathing can help as well. Don't give up just because you can't get your voice as deep as you want. There are lots of other ways to improve your voice.
Tips on warming up :https://www.wikihow.com/Develop-a-Perfect-Speaking-Voice
Or you can watch a youtube video on it as well.
I used to think about this a lot but one day it clicked, I'm going to die and I won't get to find out any point to it all. So, just find a way to drop the endless thinking and conclusioning.
Mindfulness meditation has been very helpful for me. The book Mindfulness in Plain English is highly recommended and I've recently bought it. I like it very much. YouTube has a lot of guided meditations and there's a great app called Headspace that helps teach meditation. I like the app but it's a subscription service with obly 10 free videos but they are very good videos.
Buddhism has helped me come to terms with fleetig happiness and meaninglessness of it. r/Buddhism is a great resource on reddit and on YouTube Western Australia Buddhist Society has many great talks.
I live in Northern Alabama of the US, and I got it done at a behavioral sciences of America place where my psychologist and psychiatrist are. Unfortunately it was a bit expensive for me at least- I believe it was around $300. But I know that some insurances make it cost less or none.
I’m pretty sure this is the website for what I did: Genesight.com
And I think here’s some more info on it: Mayo Clinic
In my opinion I think it was worth the money, since it can take weeks to determine whether or not a medication is working for a person or not. I think it saves a lot of time and energy. I’ve only been on my medication for a couple months but so far I think it’s worked. If you have any more questions or even just need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to pm me!
As to craigslist I think that might have been while back, they've taken out sections for that. But F'n christ Meetup has basically not a damn thing listed in my area. I have a hard time believing people in my area don't want to do a damn thing, and list it SOMEPLACE, Preferably somewhere safe, because is fucking meetup.com doesn't have anything...wouldn't there be other places or just something fucking wrong with that website if there aint shit going on?
You should look into derealization/depersonalization, it's something that happened to me when I was depressed and it felt like the world was made of cardboard and nothing really mattered, it's hard to describe but I think that's what you are talking about in the first few sentences. It took meds for me to get through it, if you can seek medical help do so, please. I have rough times still but in general I am glad to be alive and find joy in things again. Here's a link about it, but there are many other resources : https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depersonalization-derealization-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20352911
A big part is giving yourself permission to only do part of the job at once. E.g. just putting away the clean dishes makes starting the next load faster. And you said you use a dishwasher but for a lot of things that aren't heavily soiled, CAYGO is king- don't let it even hit the dishwasher, just straight from use to wash to dry. If it only touched something clean like, if you steam broccoli in a dish in the microwave, that's not even dirty so just rinse it. Anything that can dry on is a million times easier to rinse right away than to scrub later, especially silverware. You said you hate getting your hands wet- a dishwand solves half of that. You get the end wet and soapy and that hand stays dry.
Do you think a book might help? I just finished a good one about shutting down intrusive thoughts to open up your life. Maybe help you understand what's going on? Take a peek here?
Hardest lesson in life I’ve learned is people can only help themselves. You can give best advice in world but it’s up to the individual to act on them. Giving national crisis hotline number is great in my mind as you can’t be available 24x7 . Doing activities together you both like (hiking, picnic, fishing ) whatever . Including family if you have any thoughts she might be suicidal. Another thing is learning to listen , there’s insight in the book below that really helps in situations like this and I’d recommend reading it . (Granted I believe you’re a great listener already!) Also encouragement to seek counseling or find one’s foundation (helping others in our own unique way )
You're Not Listening: What You're Missing and Why It Matters https://www.amazon.com/dp/1250779871/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_CKCSGE24NFEGW313RP0W
I have a really hard time feeling and self worth unless I am being validated by my peers constantly. You may begin more depressed when you are in isolation. Personally, if others are silent, I am convinced that they think I am absurdly weird, retarded, or a piece of shit loser. I've actually approached people with my irrational fears, and have always gotten abundant confirmation that there is no negative talk about me, and that I'm "a real good dude." Yet, once the "pats on the back" stop, it all comes back. I'm 36 and just now really trying to change. Its hard, it's scary. But we have eachother! And that is very important to know. I am not a distant void in the internet. I am a person, typing on my phone, feeling just as bad if not much worse than you. Keep reaching out.
I listened to this this morning. I have a feeling you are meant to hear it
I can feel you there, you have to keep going, there is no other way around.
I´m helping people to build stable habits, that might be exactly what you are needing right now. just hop on a call if you feel like https://calendly.com/straightmind/consultation-with-marco
Hi. You are in a really bad decisions. I hate it when someone is going through that. I have been there and understand. I am a counselor and life coach. Let me freely help you thought it's if possible. Contact me for free sessions here https://calendly.com/nkennesonita/free-coaching
What I do in circumstances like these is pray, so I will pray for your friend. Also, keep trying your best to be a good friend and keep showing him or her that you truly care. I think that can make a huge impact in someone’s life. Maybe even try a little gift or act of kindness. Maybe try offering him or her this book:
https://www.amazon.com/How-Battle-Depression-Suicidal-Thoughts/dp/1933591285
It is by a good Christian author. In faith, maybe you can try that? Him or her just might want to read it.
Hey there,
I'm 100% rooting for you here. You definitely need to talk about it and write about it so it's a great step that you even wrote a post here, great job for that, that's a great start. There is a website that I use more often than not which is called www.7cups.com. It's totally free and you can get someone who will listen to you and that allows you to lay it all out there and that will help a lot.
We all have the fear that we're not something enough, it's not you personally, it's the human mind. Maybe your parents are brushing it off but maybe deep down they are thinking that they fucked up with you,so they have their own problems as well. Don't feel guilty about your feelings, I've been right there with you having all those feelings, trying to minimize time awake, binge eating to try to take the pain away. It works in the short term, but in the long term, it's affecting you in a really bad way. Try to develop healthy habits and stick to them. Start eating healthy, working out and talk about your feelings. It will not cure everything, but trust me, it will make you think more clearly.
I 100% believe in you. Much love and a big hug from around the world.
Have an outstanding day my friend,
Claude
I live in Northern Alabama of the US, and I got it done at a behavioral sciences of America place where my psychologist and psychiatrist are. Unfortunately it was a bit expensive for me at least- I believe it was around $300. But I know that some insurances make it cost less or none.
I’m pretty sure this is the website for what I did: Genesight.com
And I think here’s some more info on it: Mayo Clinic
In my opinion I think it was worth the money, since it can take weeks to determine whether or not a medication is working for a person or not. I think it saves a lot of time and energy. I’ve only been on my medication for a couple months but so far I think it’s worked. If you have any more questions or even just need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to pm me!
I'd add Smiling Mind (https://www.smilingmind.com.au/smiling-mind-app), a free mindfulness app with lots of meditation exercises categorized by themes (eg when you need immediate stress relief, have sleep issues etc...). They're a non-profit, so no ads.
30-day Calm Premium Guest Pass https://www.calm.com/gp/q2ud2e
Definitely give meditation a legit shot. This app has tons of meditation series with different goals like anxiety, self care, inner peace, stress, and awareness. It also has music made for focus to help you zone in while studying, and stuff to help with sleep. And if you end up liking you can finesse the system to get the premium for 10$ instead of 60$.
I can't honestly say that I have any answers that would work for you, but I care and can empathize with you. I'm down in a mental ravine myself. My dog and my cat help me a lot, and they are, for all intents and purposes, my children. However, I need human interaction as well, but not with just anyone; I need to feel some sort of a connection.
Here's wishing you better, happier days soon.
Please listen to this beautiful song, all the way to the end.
I think your mentality is a big factor here. First, you have to ask yourself some proper questions such as, how do I think about myself? And How do I think and relate with people?
Because you can not get better with your current state of mind. And in order to surpass it, you have to change your mindset by feeding it with the right information.
Everything that is a reality now was first conceived in the mind. It will only take some time but
if you keep at it, change will come, and you will leave a better.
You can check this book Titled "FREE YOURSELf", It will help.
Yourself-Discover-Overcome-
Challenges-
ebook/dp/B093H7LT9R/ref=sr_1_31
?
Great. The hardness of life can lead to negativity and negative thought can lead to many things such as depression, low self-esteem, and much more. Getting rid of what must do quickly because it can make one's life suck.
I believe this book titled "FREE YOURSELF" can be very useful to get rid of it and for a better life.
https://www.amazon.com/Free-Yourself-Discover-Overcome-Challenges-ebook/dp/B093H7LT9R/ref=sr\_1\_31?
I hope you might consider getting a small UV lamp instead. They pretty inexpensive online for a small one that will do for your plants and that way you don’t have to abandon them.
I started using an alarm that increases brightness and sound, it's helped a lot. I think it was here: https://www.amazon.com/Sunrise-Sleepers-Simulation-Nightlight-Daylight/dp/B081CHLF46/ref=sr_1_3?dchild=1&keywords=wake+up+light&qid=1614064836&sr=8-3
Also not sure if you've tried this already, but going to bed earlier helps me with energy the next day.
I'm sorry you're having such a difficult time.
For the flies, I'd recommend a bag trap. It will stink but they're quite effective. Generally costs around $5. Here's a link on Amazon but they also carry them at Lowe's, Home Depot, etc: https://www.amazon.com/RESCUE-Non-Toxic-Big-Trap-BFTD/dp/B000BQRQ8C
It’s temporary. Things that help: exercise, routine (sleep, eating, etc), vitamins, mindfulness (try apps), and DHA. Try a supplement like this one: https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/B07H9GL3Y8/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Also, btw, if you want to test out if white noise can help you without the commitment of buying a machine, I used to use the White Noise Lite app. It has tons of sounds and is very customizable.
Here is a link to the app on the Google Play Store: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.tmsoft.whitenoise.lite
Here's some videos about depression from a particular therapist youtuber
https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLxXgiY9n53CRP3fhDxLqYfPDIJTUXfy81
Also here's a resource for getting in touch with a therapist. Payments are usually $260 a month w/out insurance.
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.betterhelp
Also some behaviors are proven to help such as keeping a 'gratitude journal'. Just remember the road to better mental health is going to take work and only seeing a therapist isnt the solution.
I dont know your specific needs but finding some self-help books written by professionals with degrees may help you in going forward.
You are not inherently broken. We all have the same brain and the circuits that are designed to help us can go out of tune. Your depression is not your fault and there is hope for change.
hey, sorry you feel that way - and although I don't feel like I slip into depression, I've definitely struggled to stay in touch with friends too - which leads to micro lonely moments for me. My friends and I made Nurture - an app to basically remind you to keep in touch with people you care about, so kinda similar to your spreadsheet idea but automated. Hope it helps!
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.devemperor.projects.ezchat&hl=en_GB
Depression feels like extremes. You start feeling numb at a moment and anxious at another. You have no thoughts at all at a moment and over thoughts at another.
I used to practise these things when I was in depression, no matter what but start to pretend and behave, one day you would actually start feeling those things which you used to fake. And that’s the first step of getting out of a depression by yourself but make sure YOU want to get out of depression.
Here are the things I did. I started practising this every damn day.
I try to write down my diary and track my mood. Think that:
​
It works for me and I feel relaxing after writing down. It is hard to find a suitable app to write conveniently. Finally, my best friend develop one for me, named 'Stars Diary – Journal, Mood, Note, Password'.
It really helps me, I express my feeling with music and photo and capture them in app. Release my feeling from my brain.
If these things are not helping you, never hesitate to consult a psychiatrist, not because you are crazy but because you are sick. You have just a little high fever, which you wouldn’t be able to cure yourself.
you should try anti-depressants if don't already, or trying getting steady sleep i have trouble waking up, so i got an alarm clock that wakes me up by shaking my head but could blare noise as well: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B088GMYH29/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_image_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Also maybe try sorting out food the night before like hard-boiled eggs with a salad, or Oats there quite healthy as well. you could try and find a hobby, maybe something creative, and sort it into your schedule at home
I don't know if this will help, I hope it will though, i bought an alarm that shakes under my head and it really helps: https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B088GMYH29/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1 also with drawing or finding the free time it is hard, but you have to make your free time, you can't get more, when I was working I made time for things like drawing, painting, exercise, piano, and reading, I used to write a list of things I wanted to do, so every two days I would write tasks, like do laundry, practice the piano for an hour of one song, read one chapter of my book, something like that, every two days or so, the only thing is to not forget about it, but also don't feel bad if you don't complete everything just try harder each time with small baby steps. Tbh I left my job to have more time to work on skills that I will one day try to make a career off of, however your probably not 18 like me or just want more freedom financially, if you need me or want to talk improvement just DM me
The Feel Good Handbook. I've just started reading it, and it is very very highly rated and recommended. In fact, I dropped my crappy VA psychologist when he himself said that book is the backbone for everything in therapy, and if I use the lessons taught it would probably work faster than him guiding me through it. Which is good, because I do not like therapy at all. https://smile.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-Handbook-David-Burns/dp/0452281326/ref=sr_1_3?crid=1JH859G1XIL8P&dchild=1&keywords=feel+good+handbook+david+burns&qid=1601186231&sprefix=feel+good+handbook%2Caps%2C167&sr=8-3
No worries man. I’m glad you read it. And honestly I can’t explain how I’m humbled that you find it actually helpful. Thank YOU for digesting the stuff that I’ve written. It means a lot to me that I could able to feel someone better.
It’s a great thing that you’ve mentioned your needs on therapy. Just 1 thing I’d like to point at. You shouldn’t be labelling ur self in depression. Neither your parents as well. It might be completely different thing. I’m assuming your parents might have told you “you got a warm house so how come you’re depressed” or something like that. Sounds like my parents lol.
In my most honest suggestion that you keep mentioning that you need a therapist. Not in a nagging attitude ofc lol. Just try to communicate this when everyone is having a regular or a normal time. Not when you’re feeling down. In much harsh words, tell u need to talk with a professional when shields are down. Because pretending is way more tiring than just being unhappy. That’s what I’ve did for years and end up hating my self, everyone else and most sadly my parents.
Also meanwhile you’re trying to help yourself I’ve got two suggestions for you.
This book-> https://www.amazon.com/dp/1501144324/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_hPx2Db44AP10J (this cover is terrible. if you can find get the penguin release lol)
And start watching HBO’s in treatment. It’s a quite deep series. But it’ll give you an insight how to approach to a therapist. Tbh, I started to get more out of my therapy after watching this. Therapy is not a magic wand. It works when you actually converse with the human that listens you fully at that moment.
Ever heard of Bryan Cranston ? He was 44 when he started Malcom in the middle, then went on to do Breaking Bad which we all love , and now more and more movies
This is easy, find comedy club sign up. No one has ever said “I regret trying to hard for my dream” . Will Smith was a rapper and some random person at a party told him about Fresh Prince.
Some self help: Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks https://www.amazon.com/dp/0956596258/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_Fbe6Cb4WPDZN3
Good line I like is “See your problems for what they are not for what you think they are” people now aday live to 100 . You’re not even half way there. Good you recognize the problem . Get up and get moving. You are your best motivator (and procrastinator if you allow)
Depends on what sort of mental illness you are referring to? I have one and would not think twice if you are contemplating. I was suffering from extreme insomnia and anxiety and it has helped me greatly. After I saw the improvement in my sleep I have bought 3 additional ones for family and friends suffering from insomnia & so far and they all love it and rave about it. Here is the one I bought off of Amazon if you are starting to do your research on getting one of these https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07JHZ61GK?ref_=dpLink&th=1
I recently went off meds after 20 some years (also suckky childhood) because of other medical issues. I started on Omega 3 High EPA, and already was taking Vitamin D3. And I feel fine! It's been 2 months (three months off now, but the first had awful withdrawal symptoms from Paxil) And I kind of push this on others (but check with your Dr.) based on The Depression Cure: The 6-Step Program to Beat Depression without Drugs by
Stephen S. Ilardi . I am also gluten free (not for this), cut down, but not eliminated sugar. I fully intended to increase exercise but haven't yet. I did not think I would be able to do this, and fully give credit to the Omega 3's
I thoroughly believe in 6 basic human needs
Certainly Variety Significance Growth Love Contribution
Rank what is important to you in each category and what applies to it. Like me feeling significant by contributing to the well being of others in any way way I can makes me fell like my life is worth something
I’m planning on teaching a tech class to help people find jobs. I’ve learned Helping others “contributing” gives you more strength than you can ever imagine. Just look at doctors and nurses! They’re human like you and I , they get sad when they fall short. But they keep going when because they are contributing to the betterment of others and it feels their life with meaning
Beating sad thoughts is a learned habit. I used to be sick for weeks at a time. I thought best way to stop the constant nausea was to end it. I was so close one day and after I came to the realization I choose what I think about no matter how much I feel. I could remember how full and awesome it was to eat a cheeseburger when I probably had 800 calories (liquid) that whole day. I could change my state when I desired and I practiced doing so. It’s a daily battle sometimes down to the minute
https://www.habitsforwellbeing.com/6-core-human-needs-by-anthony-robbins/
Also check out this book : Dare: The New Way to End Anxiety and Stop Panic Attacks https://www.amazon.com/dp/0956596258/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_wA3CBbA0TBTQF
Life is a struggle, when we get caught up in sadness and negativity it all feeds unto itself. If your anxious you dont sleep, if you dont sleep you dont feel good and dont have the desire to eat or you choose to eat poor foods then you feel bad because of poor nutrition and it effects your work and relationships.
There's an book (it is on audible) called "DARE" speaks about finding a different perspective on your anxiety. I found it helpful. https://www.amazon.com/Dare-Anxiety-Stop-Panic-Attacks/dp/0956596258
Feeling better is a marathon, one tiny step at a time . Train your mind not to stay in a state of sadness. Way to do that is not necessarily with positive thinking / affirmations but knowing that you have the ability to change your state of mind in an instant. How would you feel if you won millions of dollars or whatever gets you excited. Make yourself go to that state of excitement practice it, then you'll notice a change in the way you feel and the more you practice the quicker you can take yourself into this state of mind when you're feeling anxious.
Best thing in the world you can do for yourself is help others. You'll find strength you never knew you had when you contribute to the betterment of others and you can do this in whatever way you see fit.
Next time you feel anxious go for a walk, then try to run . Slowly build up to every day "moving" for 30 minutes. Tell your anxiety it holds no control over you , change your breathing (breath controlled and deep) , change your mind state, do something that engages you (reading a book, drawing, whatever takes your focus).
Hello,
I think I may be able to help. Firstly, PTSD fucking sucks when it's uncontrolled and your spiralling, I've been there and I'm so sorry you're going through it. I was super upset and frightened when it happened to me but here I am, a few months later, symptom free. Two therapies got me there - Somatic Experiencing and EMDR. EMDR was awesome and can be successful in just a few sessions, so if you have any money at all to scrap together then you wouldn't need a lot of sessions at all as it works super fast (in a few sessions). Somatic Experiencing was also super helpful for me, I used it with a therapist and now I do it myself. There's a book that guides you through it https://www.amazon.co.uk/Healing-Trauma-Peter-Levine/dp/159179658X
Also, go running, they did a study and it has been proven to help PTSD symptoms. And I suggest this book - it's mandatory reading if you have PTSD, it's great and lists all the treatments that will help (some being free, such as yoga). https://www.amazon.co.uk/Body-Keeps-Score-Transformation-Trauma/dp/0141978619/ref=pd_lpo_sbs_15_t_1?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1&refRID=W1V3FFYSKP1TA07DYQY5
I completely relate to having been given a proper diagnosis. Strange and sad is a very apt description. I feel like knowing what's really going on with me is very helpful, especially in regards to finding proper medication and treatment. However, it also makes me feel like I have this incurable illness I'll never be rid of. I guess that's true, but it makes it seem so much worse than it is. The psychiatrist who performed my evaluation suggested the books and they helped a lot, even if they could be pretty painful to get through. (Introspection is necessary, but never fun.)
Here's a link to "Feeling Good" by David Burns: https://www.amazon.com/Feeling-Good-New-Mood-Therapy/dp/0380810336/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1488436919&sr=8-1&keywords=feeling+good+david+burns
And the link for the workbook I spoke of, "You, Untangled" by Amy Tibbitts: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/0989802108/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
I have faith in you :-)
Get Out of Your Mind and Into Your Life - Dr. Stephen Hayes
My therapist gave me this book which is half informational, half workbook and it has helped me immensely, especially during very dark days. Probably one of the best books out there on overcoming depression.