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There is a theory that schizophrenia is a trait leftover from the times of hunters and gatherers. Then, those who exhibited signs of visions and premonitions (psychosis) would be revered as shamans. Here's a book about the subject:
https://www.amazon.com/Shamans-Among-Schizophrenia-Shamanism-Evolutionary/dp/1300430915
That you're immature? There's nothing wrong with that. People have various ideas on how an adult should personify themselves. I'm extremely immature and a relatively happy person.
What gets my goat is when people are unhappy and want you to be unhappy. I want to go adventuring on occasion but am usually content playing video games on my computer, perusing match.com, and all.
Some adults are so broken inside. I'm aging well aesthetically, don't take my blessings for granted. I smoked and drank and partied hard for the last decade. I would never imagine such a thing as smoking, yet I do when I bust the seal on the Smirnoff. Yuck.. smoke with toxic chemicals in the lungs, how unimaginable.
I don't think it's a psychiatric disorder, being immature.
If you're happy, be happy, be immature, you be you, you know. Miserable people want you to be miserable, just can't handle this world. I'll take it tooth and nail.
When I'm paranoid I try to breathe deeply (look up videos on how to do this) and allow myself to recognize that I'm scared and feeling whatever it is I'm feeling. Once I'm finished acknowledging it I try to allow myself to move on to other thoughts. I know that sounds impossible sometimes and it can definitely be hard, but each time you catch yourself being sucked up into thinking about it, just repeat. Try looking up mindfulness exercises, they could really help you calm down.
This website has some good free guided meditation things. I never used to like them until this website. Try the 6 minute body scans, it's easiest and it might help you relax. I hope this helps.
At age 14 I was given abilify to help me "sleep" in a group home (I'm not schizophenic or delusional), I experienced sleep apnea is a side effect. Significant loss of ability to read and comprehend others. Antipsychotic induced dyskinesia (shaking arms, shoulders, neck). Also terrifying sleep paralysis (I could shut my eyes after sitting down at 6pm and be unable to move until hours later). Went from maybe 5mg-10-20 over the course of a year and a half. Psychiatrist wouldn't take no for an answer or listen to my complaints. I have no doubt he was rewarded while I suffered. Most of these symptoms lasted for years after discontinuation, with lessening severity/frequency over time (after I got out of the group home into foster care, away from him) and some last even today. Thankfully no more sleep paralysis.
I'd only advice antipsychotics if you experience hallucinations, and those hallucinations interfere with your ability to thrive/function. Other than that situation the side effects are worse than the benefit. The other off label crap doctors try to sell their products for is buttered-up B.S., don't be a sucker.
I think only one of the antipsychotics Latuda, wasn't associated with cognitive decline.
Try to seek help/advice from family. Also look into self help books. "How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big" by Scott Adams (author of Dilbert comics) is good. He claims to have overcome an OCD-ish tendency by willpower/practice/dedication, which doctors said couldn't be done.
So, there are two types of schizophrenic symptoms: positive and negative. Positive means it adds something that wasn't there before, like hallucinations, delusions, etc. Negative means it takes away something that was there, like our emotions, or our willpower. Antipsychotic medicines target the positive, but they can't target the negative. So while on medication, we often feel.. nothing. Nothing at all. No motivation, no emotions. This is one of the hardest things to deal with post-medication. The only thing I've found to deal with this is just.. sadly.. learn to live like this. No matter how hard I seek joy, I just can't find it, and no matter how much I like doing things, I feel like I'm petting a dog backwards.
Now, I'm not a psychiatrist, but, it sounds like you're also dealing with anxiety. While I could never overcome my negative symptoms, through breathing exercises and talking myself through it, I was able to completely negate almost all of my anxiety. It was hard and took a while. Though this isn't the advice a psychiatrist might give, so, I would talk to your doctor about this, see what he thinks, and see what would work best for you, whether that be therapy, medication, or both, or whatever.
As for the negative symptoms, just try to push through them, okay? They are killer. But I find they work sort of like a feedback loop: the less motivated I am, the less I do, and the less productiveness I see, so I'm less motivated. Maybe try finding a hobby, like painting, exercising, video games, or whatever works best for you. It'd be better to find something creative to do, so you can look back on your work you've accomplished and feel a sense of achievement. I find this helps me a lot when I feel unmotivated. Maybe start a blog? Check out wordpress.com. You can start one for free. Write about anything, it's all good. I love you!
Many years ago when I was taking Lamictal, I did a lot of experimentation with the mild hallucinations I was getting, which were a side effect of the drug. I discovered that different ambient sounds could elicit very distinctive 'flavors' of hallucinations, and heard-voices with unique personalities. I didn't stay on Lamictal too much longer, since the hallucinations worsened, but here are some of my old sound files: https://archive.org/details/DivinatitasDementis
Edit: It occurs to me than Schizophrenic hallucinations are NOT similarly contingent on stimuli, but it's been a long time since I studied Schizophrenia.
Its called Cotards delusion. I don't have it, but it's a thing.
Feel better soon
Someone posted like a week ago these online brain tests you can do. If you take them regularly they'll track improvements or declines. It measures all sorts of stuff, including ability to recognize or remember patterns. Plus it's fun to take. Just thought I'd mention it in case you're interested!
Edit to add the link--
http://www.cambridgebrainsciences.com/challenge/introduction/2
You might be able to get some perspective by reading: "I Know This Much Is True", by Wally Lamb. Link to amazon. Most likely can find it at your library, also. It shows twins, one of which is schizophrenic and shows what he does to fix the world by his extreme sacrifice. Shows in depth the futility of it. It will give you perspective to be able to fight the demons from within who are puching you to do this sacrifice you speak of.
Hope this helps.
������������Whoa that's awesome!������������ I used to be pretty talented at drawing/sketching when I was young, but at some point the anhedonia set in and I never picked it back up. Maybe I should read that Drawing on the Right Side of the Brain book and give it another shot!
Have you heard of this site? I've heard they provide good training and it's free for programming: https://www.freecodecamp.org/
It's something I eventually want to try and explore.
G'luck with your training!
Imo schizo is a transition from rational to symbolic thought. Few mundanes can interpret our communications. Actually I think you might be picking up on thought forms These have been well studied--however modern medicine ignores them. Check out the section on musical thought forms in this book:
You can get coloring books for grown ups for less than five dollars or print the pages off of the internet and you could buy colored pencils for about $0.69
Your home computer probably has a paint section.
Art is fantastic because you really can't get it wrong. Paint is very good because you can touch it. My first painting was done with my fingers and toes in accrylic.
Then I painted on a neck tie one time.
Art is so fantastic
Keep going with your art projects this is really good and I've always found that a creative outlet is a huge reliever of stress. Since I'm assuming you like anime or manga and it's a show with a very similar idea to your first pic of seeing aura's, check out Natsume Takashi it's on Crunchyroll so its not too hard to find.
It's an allegory for schizophrenia where the main character can see "spirits" and winds up in some adventure resulting from the conflicts between them as well as other challenges and prejudice for "not being right in the head" but overall the show is extremely heartwarming since he handles it really well.
I saw a study recently on reddit, but I cannot find the link (EDIT: I found it)
But, there are many complications of psychosis associated with it and in general, it should be avoided.
Unless it is prepared and controlled strictly like other drugs, the contents of the plant or what is with it cannot be known for sure and the effects thereof can be highly variable.
Yeah, a couple years ago I researched all that pretty thoroughly because of some of my experiences.
The device you're referencing is commonly called "The Voice of God Weapon", and someone had linked me to a patent on https://patents.google.com/ for a "voice to skull" microwave transmission system registered to the U.S Gov. in 1993 or '95. So...
Really though, I was more interested in reverse functional magnetic resonance imaging (RFMRI), which could theoretically replicate both telepathy, and mind control (MRI imprinting).
Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation: Mayo Clinic
And also I read an article about a study that seemed to show that holding a powerful electromagnet next to the skull in the right place measurably reduced impulse control in gambling addicts.
Eventually, I chatted with a cat that seemed quite knowledgeable/intelligent, and that claimed to work in the surveillance/security industry (no idea if that was legit), and when I asked him about RFMRI he proposed that it would probably create a lot of heat via induction, and possibly cook the brain of the targeted individual.
I kinda grew out of that phase though, and now I'm concentrating on getting stable, going back to uni, and starting a family, so I'm just focusing on that atm.
Be Well Fellow Traveler
High-functioning "schizophrenics" likely do not have schizophrenia, but rather possibly have a dissociative disorder. Even though many dissociative disorders are known to have auditory and visual hallucinations at a rate equal if not greater than those with Schizophrenia, most docs are not trained to distinguish between the two disorders. This is why many dissociatives get miss-classified as schizophrenics (50% of those with DID report a previous misdiagnosis of schizophrenia). This is also why dissociative treatment principles, like those adopted by the Hearing Voices Movement (and your Rufus May example), are effective in the Schiz population -- there are many unidentified dissociatives there!
That the hearing voice movement -- meaning making of one's voices - is a dissociation-based paradigm, can be seen at:
So far as distinguishing dissociative from schizophrenic conditions, here is a link to papers demonstating that use of the SCID-D diagnostic interview for dissociative disorders is sensitive to the differences and can therefore be used to deferentially diagnose:
The value in distinguishing is that with dissociative disorders, recovery is possible through the use of dissociation-targeted psychotherapy.
I enjoy being in the hospital too because I am around people that are easy to make friends with, don't have much responsibilities, don't have to prepare my food and I can relate with everyone. But it is very disappointing for my parents when I relapse and am hospitalized so I have to try to do whatever I can to stay out of the hospitals.
Right now I am working on things to make my life more enjoyable like going to meetup.com events to meet new people.
The app exists for iPhone! I don't know how to play the game part but it looks simple to me as far as the tasks/goals are concerned! Thanks for recommending this! It looks fun indeed.
if you think writing is creative, I wrote two books. I designed the covers too! 😁On reddit, there is a group called the schizophrenia art project. Lots of awesome artwork in the group! GL!
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https://www.amazon.com/dp/1532069901/ref=cm_sw_r_em_api_i_c_igVZCbE92FM4V
art has helped me a lot. I'm glad you found something creative, I wished someone had told me that art would help me when I was first diagnosed. here's a book that will help you with your painting journey. It has helped me with my music/math/programming/graphic arts journey.
You rarely become schizophrenis I have a model that explains schizophrenia https://www.amazon.com/Everybody-Had-Wings-UNDERSTANDING-SCHIZOPHRENIA/dp/0997716711/ref=mp_s_a_1_1?dchild=1&keywords=kevin+laser&qid=1605379357&s=books&sr=1-1
Having friendships in a job can make a crummy job by itself, great instead! Also, if the job isn't going to be great long term then definitely keep searching for and applying to other jobs in your free time.
Have you tried L-Theanine? .1-.2g/day for relaxation/anxiety, and .4g/day for some schizophrenia relief. It was $21.22 for 250g for me from BulkSupplements/Amazon... that is 2.1 cents/day at the lowest dose.
Insurance and the players in them have long ago turned into a racketeering market. Self-insure once you're able, and learn how to negotiate (from a self-help book if you don't have family/friends that can help out). Also you could look for low cost services for the poor in your area, you'll have to ask your local government for help... https://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2017/04/history-health-care-america-obamacare-aca/521541/?utm_source=atlfb
Don't work for free, ever. Unless it's family. Or you're rich and being philanthropic. Employers dangling the carrot of experience are far more often than not looking for cheap labor... it is a mill I got suckered into for too long. I now know to laugh in their face if anyone ever tries to pull that on me again. Then again I'm not that familiar with your career field & its status-quo.
Also, self help books, they're great! I'd recommend 'How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big' by Scott Adams (author of Dilbert comic strip).
That's tough, you'd think they would be more sensitive.
The voices can be very persecutory for me. I worry about being framed or false accusations. I then get fixated on the possibilities. What if a mind-weapon exists? Why are they targeting me? Maybe this is some sort of pre-crime program and I fit the profile because I'm a little off? Do they want me in prison?
Talking about it feeds the paranoia. I realize that whoever listens, may listen with suspicion. Maybe that's the mind-weapon operators playbook? They want the victim to hang themself figuratively or literally because what they do in secret is illegal and immoral by every rule of man and god. If such a thing is true then it is the worst evil that I can imagine today.
I've been reading "Man's Search for Meaning" written by a holocaust survivor. It's comforting to know that even if I did end up in prison or institutionalized I still wouldn't have it as bad as being in a concentration camp. I'm still free and I value my freedom.
I do not have schizophrenia, but CBT was tremendously helpful to me after our family member was diagnosed. I have practiced metaprogramming (similar concept) for years so I think it came easy to me. In particular, working through The Feeling Good Handbook by David Burns made a huge difference. The exercises in it were great training.
That said, CBT was only nominally helpful to our family member (from my perspective). For the best outcome, CBT should be practiced daily, outside the appointment times, and our family member has difficulty with that.
My grandmother who is a psychologist is reading this book to help her clients with anxiety, and says she really likes it so far. Another client recommended it to her read. Maybe you'll like it too:
https://www.amazon.com/Anxiety-Rx-Prescription-Relief-Created/dp/1734426543
> had the "schizophrenia formatting" I see on such sites (I am a web developer).
what exactly is that?
This might be a good site to explore. I'm not aware of all the classes they offer, but they focus on a range of programming and it's free certifications. All online. Also people who complete it are known to go on to good tech companies. This is something I eventually want to explore too. https://www.freecodecamp.org/
> in my case its going to a 6month coding boot camp
Have you heard of Free Code Camp? They offer a range of free coding classes and certificates. People who complete their classes are known to go on to very good tech companies. I'm thinking of eventually trying it out myself. https://www.freecodecamp.org/
G'luck with your studies!
I think most people have success with medication in the long-term, as in would say, is an overall improvement to their lives. I think it depends on the person how much it makes the voices go away, how often. The other side of treatment is therapy, where you can learn skills to lessen the impact of the voices and the distress they cause you. There is good evidence that says ACT for psychosis and MCT for psychosis help. Check out this book (Compassion focused therapy for voices) And the process of getting help, talking to someone about it finally, getting over the stigma and worries about being treated differently etc, that's healing in itself to go through.
You don't have to tell your doctor every painful detail, you can speak in more general terms, about the clinical facts about your symptoms, so you're not holding back any important info, but you're also not sharing the alarming details that are upsetting to talk about or seen as too risky to share, I think, you can walk a line there. I think whatever happens, if you take care of yourself, try to keep yourself calm, you can get through everything just fine, nothing you can't handle. Best of luck
prior to this proof's print, I sent off to my ward's Bishop, and a few institutes which have forever changed, not who, but how I see of the world, myself, and all few-and-far-between. https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B0BHMXMQNF
You can read any book for free with libgen. You need to read this book, and all her books, look at youtube interviews with the author. Stay hard my friend. Guess what, I think you are pretty fucking cool, you had the guts to come online, spill your truth, look for help, that took guts
There is a popular book The Center Can ot Hold , where the author talks about her journey with Schizophrenia. In the book, she talks about her breaks she had to take in her education, and how she dealt with going back.
Here’s a link to it. It was pretty good when I tried it. But I think I need another go at it
you need a us listing? also it's while on meds. I've written 2 more, off them. and started a new one as of 3 nights ago. no I did not make the cover, I wrote the work. I'm the author on the back.
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https://www.amazon.com/dp/B09T5DFLLL this is a kindle of my life's story, us distro :)
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but ya. the research papers are 17 usd... which is why i can't figure if I'll make a ebook later.
also, thank you...
https://www.amazon.co.uk/dp/B09YYNTKCQ
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i thought, maybe you wanted to look it over. I do very simplistic covers anymore. had this one, on comission.
It might not be the healthiest way of going about it, but if it makes you feel better then run with it! I found something on Amazon called a Mic-Lock- it's a small gadget that plugs into your phone's audio jack and disables the microphone. I could be wrong but I think it allows audio-playback through your speakers while it's plugged in. Hopefully this helps!
Ahhh I'm seriously gonna cry with all of the compliments!!! I'm really glad that you enjoy my handwriting I would have never thought people would like it as much as they do.
I got the scrap papers from Amazon, they come inside of a scrapbooking kit. Its not the exact link but these ones are similar
My auditory hallucinations come at night around bedtime as well. There's a fan called the Vornado that helps me drown them out.
Vornado 530 Compact Whole Room Air Circulator Fan, Black https://www.amazon.com/dp/B000E5S4MW/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_3A7BDYG8SCGYXBBJVHXM
I remember the guy being told he was not ugly and not believing it is an important element of the diagnosis, I figure the difference between low self esteem and disorder lays about there.
I think [this is the English version of the book](www.amazon.com.br/dp/1585624632/ref=cm_sw_r_awdo_BTWGMF9WE41PMW5YSQHC), if you want to check it out. Maybe there’s a pdf somewhere. It’s the same author from the one I read (and the same title), but I read a translation to my language so I don’t know if the case is there.
Hope you figure it out.
So sorry for the late, reply. I didn't get the notification. I get my squishies on Amazon. Like these:
OCATO Squishies Mochi Squishy Toys 40pcs Party Favors for Kids Mini Squishy Kawaii Mochi Animal Squishies Cat Unicorn Squishy Mini Squeeze Stress Relief Toys for Kids Adults Treasure Box Toys, Random https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07JVHP3QD/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_i_8HMF9DCZAPDCW9NH7BF6?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
They are kind of like stress balls. But I like them to be able to fit in my palm and squish them. I also like the cute shapes. I keep them on me everywhere.
It's a possibility that you have a genetic predisposition. What does it mean for you? In any case, avoid drugs. Cannabis included. They can trigger it. Maybe get a book about it.
I'll give you a link to something that I buy that helps me and my hubby both out to get out of bed and off the couch to do things. It's just caffeine pills, but it's super helpful with helping you get that little extra kick. So long as caffeine doesn't cause you psychoses. Check with your coffee maker before purchase to make sure you'll be fine.
https://www.amazon.com/MuscleTech-Supplements-PreWorkout-Supplement-Nutrition/dp/B07GY3J99B/
You're alive, you're real, and doing something that feels good will prove that much better than harming yourself. I have a stim toy called a monkey ring that I use for sensory seeking, maybe something like that would help you? https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01ISA8UWI/ref=ppx\_yo\_dt\_b\_asin\_title\_o02\_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
Dude, meditate and read the Quran and bible then see how this makes you feel. You have tapped into the spiritual, it's up to you to take care of it get yourself a relationship with The Spirit. One of Carl Jung's drawings, which is called 'One word that was never spoken. / One light that was never lit up. / An unparalleled confusion. / And a road without end.' Corresponds to 'The Manifestation of Divine Light which is a Surah in the Quran.
May I introduce you to the psychiatrist Carl Jung who dealt with such sides of the personality(the unconscious mind). He made the Red Book which was a book filled with drawings of what he saw in the unconscious mind. With his minds eye he saw visions where he saw/heard things and those led to psychological breakthroughs.
I've seen art here on this sub play out into my environment in a prophetic way. I saw it in the sub then i saw it days later in strange place(obviously strange since I didn't expect to see it, and we're abstract why vibes) And some of it is reminiscent of the Red Book/New Book
Honestly why TF is Carl Jung called the father of psychology if We(people with abnormal functions he experimented with in himself and with his patients) are given pills and treated to strange conditions? I'm not a new ageist, nor a conspiracy theorist, I'm confused by how little we try to learn about how we were made.
What you describe seems to be negative symptoms and emotional flattening. that's ery common in schizophrenia and you can read about them in any page which talks about the symptoms.
https://www.webmd.com/schizophrenia/schizophrenia-symptoms
Why don't you go see a doctor? You need it. There must be a way... let your boyfriend pay you one or try to find a charity that works with mentally ill patients in your city.
>
I've tried other forms of medicine/therapy that temporarily helped me called cupping. I don't know if it will help you the same way it helped me however I noticed my sleeping patterns were much healthier and I felt like I was lighter.
Lately I like Daft Punk. Their Alive 2007 really kicks me up. I listen to it over and over again. Apart from that I like minimal techno, like Basic Channel and Russ Gabriel and Gas. It's just clean and calming. Then there's this one https://rateyourmusic.com/release/album/dawn_of_midi/dysnomia/ I've been listening to a lot, before I started listening to Daft Punk on repeat.
Here it was: https://processwire.com/talk/topic/16136-amigotoday/
What do You think of it?
I was struggling with no friends for some time before schizophrenia kicked in, in that time I was developing that site, unfortunately it's offline now.
I think it is good. I've just started writing about my schizophrenia, you can see my first piece here https://medium.com/@szfighter/living-in-the-podrome-a-year-with-psychosis-472669a5fad (an overview of the past year and going to start writing episodic stories)
Well, if you want to join me you can set-up one through this tutorial at Digital Ocean. There's a $10 promotional code if you search around on the internets that can give you two months of $5/mo 512MB/20GB/1TB bandwidth server.
I basically "copy-pasta" the command-line instructions onto the terminal console.
Depends on where you are but I would say yes you could but as you're aware you would need a portfolio.
I would make a post at this site https://news.ycombinator.com/ In particular you want to format your post heading something like this https://news.ycombinator.com/ask.
A search on there will likely turn up some good information as well.
It's a bit like reddit but no subreddits and its specifically for tech and in particular Silicon Valley. If you post at the right time you'll probably end up with good advice.
I've wondered about inconsistency of medication, usually my meds will put me to sleep but sometimes they have no effect at all. I wonder if they test consistency. Sign up at https://www.healthcare.gov/ , should be free if you don't have income.
Due to stress, you could be dissociating... It's kind of natural to feel afraid if you feel that nothing and nobody is real. https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/depersonalization-derealization-disorder/symptoms-causes/syc-20352911
Pro tip is a little self-exhalatory, but it's the closest flair. For those that do not recognize my username, I do not have schizophrenia. However, I suspect that I have undiagnosed ADHD and struggle with many of the same things that affect those with negative symptoms.
Laundry is a bitch for me.
I am constantly trying to stay on top and ensure that I have at least clear underwear & socks.
I fail often. (Outwardly I look like I have my shit together to other people--and I do, but I also don't. I can safely share this here because of Reddit's anonymity)
However, I've recently tried out a different sorting method and this is working well. Rather than sorting by lights, darks, and neutrals (or not sorting and having a Himalayan mound of dirty clothes). I'm now sorting by socks, pj's, & underwear; tops & dresses; bottoms; and outerwear (jackets & sweatshirts -- I love a cozy sweatshirt) into four designated sub-laundry baskets. (Outerwear; bottoms; tops & dresses; and underwear, socks, & pj's). Fuck colors vs whites, I wash everything on cold.
I am 40+ and have struggled with laundry since my teens when my mom was done with doing my laundry. I really think with this method I'm going to finally stay on top of my laundry and wanted to share with anyone else who struggles with this part of "adulting".
The image is from this Amazon post (I'm going to buy this thing): https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07X4GRMTH/ref=sw_img_1?smid=&psc=1
Yeah, I can see how a junk journal may not be a good idea if it will ramp you up. If you want a couple of calming evening activities, I like puzzles and adult (not sexual, just more complex) coloring books. This is one I am eying on amazon: https://www.amazon.com/Mandala-Coloring-Quality-Hardback-Binding/dp/0996511210/ref=sr_1_9?crid=2M7PW7R4ZI3K7&keywords=spiral+bound+adult+coloring+book&qid=1638848685&s=books&sprefix=spiral+%2Cstripbooks%2C261&sr=1-9
I like using gel pens when I color.
🙃
Ah that's embarrassing. My bad. I was wondering about that girl. I was wondering if it was something like Munchhausen she has going on. Or absolute boredom. I doubt she'll ever go back to that account but she'll probably come around here with a different one. Sorry again.
To post link in comments first make one of these, no spaces: []()
in the [] bracket type or paste in your subject
example: [kite]
In the parenthesis bracket () , type or paste in the URL
example [kite]_(https://tinyurl.com/yca2r8x8)
I have a space in between them so you can see what it looks like but without the space it turns automatically into a link:
Yeah, neither 1) nor 2) are small feats.
I don't want to minimize how either task impacts you. It can look simple when written as words like, " Tell your boss your have schizophrenia", which expands to, "Tell your boss you have a mental illness they likely have entirely wrong notions about that they now need to help accommodate for your to be successful in your job--and they will feel wholly unprepared to help you with because mental health education is lacking everywhere." God that's overwhelming for everyone.
However, working with the idea that your bosses are good people, all you need to give them in a start in the right direction. You don't need to give them all the answers. If I were in your place, I would start with a Mind Map, which is a brainstorming tool. I'd put "What I need to be successful" in the center of the map, and then start branching from there.
There are no wrong answers in the map, and you your job may not be able to provide all of them. However, at the end, what you want to find is the intersection of where you feel good about your job and your bosses feel good about you as an employee.
> nothing is licensed
You may want to specific your intended copyright and licensing. If you have no particular license in mind, the descriptions of the Creative Commons Licenses will probably help you pick a license (either one of those or another one).
Good luck with the film. If you have any questions for me, you can ask. I do not know what information to volunteer more than I have as it may not be relevant (and, I've had Schizophrenia infancy probably, so my perspective is likely quite different from people who develop it later).
I took a medical librarian class and this tool was brought up: https://www.webmd.com/pill-identification/default.htm
It's great for identifying pills (sometimes there's a lot) and looking up symptoms. One of mine causes me to clench my jaw. It's apparently a rare side-effect, but it's nice to know what's going on with your brain.
Also, if he just started medication, he should know that it would always take 4-6 months to level out. Once there, he may need to up or low his prescription, but usually by then the more intense side effects start to calm down.
For ex) I've always been a vivid dreamer. Sometimes I'd wake up exhausted because I was running around all night. When I stated a sedative, I stopped dreaming for the better part of a year.
Yeah all this. I was gonna recommend a dual boot system. Boot into windows for gaming and Linux(Ubuntu) for everything else. Lutris is also a good idea if that's easier for you. Windows likes to be weird and do shit by itself (updates, restarting, etc.) so I don't think it's 100% paranoia. Check your task manager when you hard drive starts working hard and sort by memory to find whatever is eating up your resources. Could be a resource hog(tabs open in a browser for example), malware/spyware or a virus, it happens.
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If you wanna get more hardcore, go into the details tab, sort by memory, find the offending program's PID number, and then kill it in the command prompt (Go to search in windows 10 , type cmd, hit enter, black box should pop up, do ur thing in there):
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https://winaero.com/blog/kill-process-windows-10/
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Hopefully some of these tools/ideas will put your mind at ease.
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Here's an album with some more pictures.
The ones that originally were things like fields remind me a lot of my hallucinations. Where there is sort of the impression of something in my field of vision, but not an actual thing. For example, the tree has the impression of a building, but it's still a tree.
I don't know, I thought it was interesting and decided to share.
Download GIMP from here
Play with photo/image editing by experimenting with filters, cropping, scaling, selecting areas and deleting them or moving them etc. Learn about layers and making fun composited images. You can also make drawings and full color graphics.
Those with auditory and/or visual hallucinations possibly have a dissociative disorder. Even though many dissociative disorders are known to have auditory and visual hallucinations at a rate equal if not greater than those with Schizophrenia, most docs are not trained to distinguish between the two disorders. This is why many dissociatives get miss-classified as schizophrenics (50% of those with DID report a previous misdiagnosis of schizophrenia). This is also why dissociative treatment principles, like those adopted by the Hearing Voices Movement (and your Rufus May example), are effective in the Schiz population -- there are many unidentified dissociatives there! That the hearing voice movement -- meaning making of one's voices - is a dissociation-based paradigm, can be seen at: https://www.academia.edu/2326637/Longden_E._Madill_A._Waterman_M.G._2012_Dissociation_trauma_and_the_role_of_lived_experience_Toward_a_new_conceptualization_of_voice_hearing So far as distinguishing dissociative from schizophrenic conditions, here is a link to papers demonstating that use of the SCID-D diagnostic interview for dissociative disorders is sensitive to the differences and can therefore be used to deferentially diagnose: http://ge.tt/3r9UY2s1?c The value in distinguishing is that with dissociative disorders, recovery is possible through the use of dissociation-targeted psychotherapy.
It sounds like you have a diagnosis and are already accepting treatment, so this entire book. may not apply ... but your mom might benefit from reading this book.
It goes into ways of talking about these things that are helpful and ways that aren’t helpful, and how to work as a team with the person with the illness rather than get deadlocked about the delusions. It might help her get past some of her fears about reinforcing delusions etc.
This book, 'laziness does not exist', addresses this concept https://www.amazon.co.uk/Laziness-Exist-Devon-Price-Ph-D/dp/1982140100
I agree people who judge schizophrenics or those experiencing symptoms of avolition are idiots.
Actually, plants feel pain. Imo vegetarians are causing more pain and suffering in the natural world than meat eaters. They are just being hypocritical by claiming that animals suffer more. Check out this book: https://www.amazon.com/Secret-Life-Plants-Fascinating-Emotional-ebook/dp/B079WVKWBN
I saw below that you've got an appointment waiting for you - in the meantime I'll offer any coping mechanisms I've got. To start, you should go to the hospital. However, I'm someone who will actively refuse to go to a hospital unless it's absolutely futile. I get these kind of delusions a lot, too. Food I've not got a good way of getting around, but with the water I have one of these portable straw filter thingies. They were created for people who live in places with low access to safe water and are the best portable water filter on the market. I have a hard time believing things, but if I'm ever too paranoid to drink water this usually does the trick until I can get myself some help
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its not a art book but its a book on mastering anything. I have an art book recommendation but ive only read through a couple of chapters and ill wait to link that till im done.
This happens to me when I take a break from writing music. I have to write a couple of short practice songs to get back into it. breaks are a good thing. when Im burnt out from writing music I break for a a couple of weeks to a month; usually I turn my focus to another hobby and when I'm burnt out on that, I switch back to music. Here's a book that will help you get better at drawing or learning a new skill. You can probably find the audio version on amazon too. https://www.amazon.com/Peak-Secrets-New-Science-Expertise-ebook/dp/B011H56MKS/ref=sr_1_2?dchild=1&keywords=peak+in+books&qid=1617925365&sr=8-2
Look up “Inner Child” and you might find your answer. I am currently reading an amazing book called The Child In You & in it I found the answer to this question! Here’s a link for the book if interested: https://www.amazon.com/Child-You-Breakthrough-Bringing-Authentic/dp/0143135937/ref=nodl_[The Child In You](https://www.amazon.com/Child-You-Breakthrough-Bringing-Authentic/dp/0143135937/ref=nodl_)
Sound cancelling over-ear headphones. Maybe earplugs along with it. Won't hear anything.
https://www.amazon.ca/gp/product/B085RNVJ3P/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_search_asin_title?ie=UTF8&psc=1
These are fairly priced. I use em. Sanity saver.
hidden camera detector should help put your mind at ease
https://www.amazon.ca/Detector-Handheld-Security-Surveillance-Equipment/dp/B07TDNJJZ3 smallest spy cameras commercially available are roughly penny sized. can be fit in USB charge blocks etc
Here's the exact plush that I hug and cuddle with for when I need comfort.
There are some that are super duper soft, but I'm sure you can find them if you search for them. There's other huggable plush animals than just red pandas.
https://www.amazon.com/Natures-Way-Verified-Certified-Vegetarian/dp/B074N9YLVJ/
320 pills, 3 months worth, at least.
Definitely buy citric acid with it, otherwise you'll get joint pains.
https://www.amazon.com/Its-Just-Malic-Acid-12oz/dp/B07Q4R8W2D/
I’m sorry you are going through this and are without meds for so long. I did take lion’s mane briefly and while I felt like it didn’t do anything at the time in retrospect looking back it probably helped me with my symptoms and I think I am going to try taking it again.
This is the supplement that I used. It’s only $20 for 30 days worth on amazon.
Lions Mane Mushroom Capsules Strongest 1500mg Per Serving - Organic Powder Capsules Vegan Friendly Supplement - Brain, Nerve & Immune System Function Benefits - Powerful Superfood https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07BD3DHZG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_JosYDbVFEN1JG
I would get intruder alarms and put them on every single window. They are little alarms that stick to entry ways and make a loud chiming noise when the 2 pieces are separated from each other https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0727QX9SC/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_O8eKFb01ES351
It seems he fixated on you two for some reason, and clearly whatever delusions he may be having cant be good. Schizophrenics can be very unstable and unpredictable while having an episode, and it would be best to stay aware at all times for awhile, as chances are this won't be the last time you have to deal with a situation like this. Talking with him may help, but common sense and rational thought goes out the window while having an episode, at least in my experience. You'd be best to stop making contact with him like others have mentioned, as its probably feeding into his delusions, especially if he doesn't have anyone to talk to/be around most of the time. I would also think about getting a restraining order so that way if he does it again he can actually be removed from the situation. Honestly, who cares about his situation? If he is a threat to your safety, you need to be willing to do what it takes to keep that safety. As a schizophrenic, I wouldn't expect anything else from anyone if I were to ever have an episode that had me trying to harm others
I love my shades, they keep the light from being overwhelming and loud.
Here's the brand, Dollger. They average about $15?
They come in lot's of colors, now.
https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07PBJ289F/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_93hGFbY830E7P
May I please share mine with you?
I've got hyperphantasia, synesthesia, PTSD, bipolar, and the counselor I'm seeing today whispered to me that I've got schitzophrenia.
I'm trying to face that I have it.
Get it officially added to the list.
... not everyone who sees and hears things sees the same things.
The scariest things usually coincide with a lot of pain and stresses.
I put my book up on Amazon. (I made it free yesterday, I'm not certain it still is.)
https://www.amazon.com/Blinded-Songs-Starlight-Honoured-Matron-ebook/dp/B088LYM8J6
I bought it from amazon and I didn’t get the best one but I noticed improvements right away. It helped my voices and decreased anxiety right away. You really can’t go wrong for $19
I bought this one:
But apparently this is the best supplement. It contains only the active ingredient from the mushroom.
My former psychiatrist's office had these: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07DJL3Y8K/ref=emc_b_5_t
They make a nice "whooshing" sound; similar to a giant fan in the room, but with no airflow. Best doc's office ever, set me completely at ease.
I forgot that I wanted one.
I don't want to delete them. I edit this one already, but I will leave the other up. I won't let them 'win' and I've blocked her email. If I have more spam issues I will contact Torguard and ask for a new email.
I'm going to have my SO check my alerts on my other post so it filters out any bad juju for me.
Letting someone win after how I was treated makes me feel...shittier. I can't explain it. Probably stupid but. I just don't want to submit.
Someone linked it beforehand.
She emailed me asking for the harrassment to stop. I didn't harass her. I had no idea anyone was.
I apologized profusely to her and said she could read the post herself to see I was venting and not telling people to go attack her.
And then now it is all weekend and I feel like a terrible person and I'm snapping out of anger at people of hers who message me and I'm like "I didn't even bother you. I did nothing to harass you."
My Reddit username is literally the only social media I have. Sometimes I reactivate my Facebook to download pictures off my album for when I delete it but that's it.
And I am gonna see if Torguard can give me a new email free because I like them and don't want my email leaked out.
I literally didn't ask anyone to bother her. I would have done the tmyself if I wanted to. I didn't want her to lawyer up and sue me or something so I showed her the post, but she had seen it before since she mentioned it on IG according to my SO who has an IG.
I just didn't wanna be sued for some obscure law because i can't afford lawyer and didn't do anything.
Early signs for me were social withdraw, difficulty thinking clearly, and mild hallucinations when stressed (such as when missing sleep). Others will notice a change in behavior and likely comment on it.
There's not much you can do to prevent it, but you can avoid triggers. I would strongly advise against using any illicit drugs, but especially cannabis, amphetamines and other hard stimulants, and psychedelics. Also avoid missing significant amounts of sleep (such as a whole night).
There's also been a study that demonstrated that fish oil may prevent psychosis. The study is a bit tedious so here is a summary from WebMD. This is the one I take. It closely matches the doses used in the study. The idea that fish oil can prevent psychosis seems kinda dumb and personally I haven't noticed a difference but it doesn't hurt to take it other than costing ~$25 per year.
I have the book, I read the last chapter since you're interested. As I interpreted it, she has a lot of negative beliefs about her condition and believes she will always need medication. Not all schizophrenics are violent although a very small percentage are. There's a few great paragraphs that I really relate with. I'll read the rest of it eventually, I'm working on another book at the moment. I reflected on logotherapy, 'Man's Search for Meaning' and how he mentioned that the typical thought focuses on ones condition instead of finding and giving life meaning.
Great ramble. Yes it was interesting to be close to my mom's schizo and then have my own, you get it.
As for the rest, well... it would take a book to provide enough context to make a modest, intelligent statement about what ~could~ be, in the greater universe. I am writing such a book. The challenge will be to have it come out as a book like "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", instead of "Hey I'm Schizo Check Out My HeartFelt But Modest Success Story Which Ruffles No Feathers!" I will be ruffling feathers. I have a history of business success and I hope for this book to NOT be just another schizo book. Self-publishing has produced a lot of schizo crap lately, unfortunately.
It's a jungle out there, and I think in the big picture, humans are just another animal in the big bad jungle. It would be ridiculous for us to assume we had any measurable percentage of the answers to life's questions. We are apes waving sticks at the sky, probably. We have no reason what-so-ever to believe otherwise, except raw ego that tells us we should believe that we are "special" in the universe.
The ant pope, in the mud at the base of the tree in the jungle, wearing his little ant pope hat, addressing his fellow ants with his chemical trail, saying, "We ARE God's Chosen Beings. Heaven is being prepared for US." And then the ant in the background is like, fuck you, dude. And the ant in the corner currently has a mind-controlling parasite controlling his mind, and is trying to decide which way is the stalk he has to go die at. Yes, ants have mind-control parasites. Isn't the jungle fun!
latenighthope> Keep working at it buddy. Usually between 4-8 months is the hardest time to go without antipsychotics. Just keep working at it. It was good to get help when you needed it. Just don't assume you need it the rest of your life. It takes time. Read up on stoicism. It may help you as well. Read some Meditations by Marcus Aurelius. Its helping me . I'm bipolar and have been off meds since before Halloween.
Dogen-zenji said,
>"You should establish your practice in your delusion." Even though you think you are in delusion, your pure mind is there. To realize pure mind in your delusion is practice. If you have pure mind, essential mind in your delusion, the delusion will vanish. It cannot stay when you say, "This is delusion!" It will be very much ashamed. It will run away. So you should establish your practice in your delusion. To have delusion is practice. This is to attain enlightenment before you realize it. Even though you do not realize it, you have it. So when you say, "This is delusion," that is actually enlightenment itself. If you try to expel the delusion it will only persist the more, and your mind will become busier and busier trying to cope with it. That is not so good. Just say, "Oh, this is just delusion," and do not be bothered by it. When you just observe the delusion, you have your true mind, your calm, peaceful mind. When you start to cope with it you will be involved in delusion.
-Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind by Shunryu Suzuki
You seem to have grown out of the delusion and think otherwise, so I can only encourage you to recognize it as an old concept instead of trying to erase it. You think others may have went to your wonderland, this doesn't matter. You must find inner peace on your own. If you suffer, others can only help guide you, and it is hard to face alone.
Yes. Advocates for schizos, as well as advocates for humans.
The oldie but goodie, "Zen and the Art of Motorcycle Maintenance", was a worldwide best-seller. It's described as one of the most important books of the last century. The author dropped out of college because of mental distractions, had a nervous breakdown, was diagnosed schizo, and got shock treatments. Then, with his "it's not me, but it's really me" narrative, he was instrumental in introducing Zen to a world very hungry for information on eastern philosophies (think, the "Bruce Lee" craze, and "Karate Chops" in action movies). ZAMM is one of the most famous English-language books in the last century, to be sure (though people are forgetting about it these days, and we've got a glut of information on all manner of esoteric philosophies and religions, through the internet, now).
Pirsig bypassed stigma by not mentioning any of that stuff. But times are changing and we need a good "crazy" book, that doesn't read like someone coming down off an episode, hehe. No more books on schizophrenia by closed-minded doctors, please.
I bought these a few weeks ago cause I lost mine while moving. They are cheapo but still pretty nice.
Non Skid Socks by Vive [6 Pairs] Slip Free Hospital Sock w/ Rubber Gripper Soles - Warm, Fuzzy & Comfortable - Mens & Womens (Blue) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B06XJ9KS8G/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_9GmjAbM8MRYVE
Why do you want them to stop? Because they bother you and distract you, and the more they do that the worse it gets. One way that might help would be to use approaches were you "reply" to them like "okay yeah, but I'm going to listen to my boss, and try anyway" so they don't have power. Also consider they are "brain noise". Realising they don't have power over you could make you more relaxed about them. I once read about a woman who had voices and after years of treatment started to improve once she heard about the Greeks viewing those with voices as blessed and special humans. It can be a lot about context.
Source: mainly this (incredible) book: https://www.amazon.co.uk/Cant-Hear-Them-Simon-McCarthy-Jones/dp/1785922564