On hot Summer days like today, I let my glorious $25 bidet shoot water at my butthole for 5 minutes longer than needed while scrolling Reddit.
I had to wear a suit every day for a year and a half. Luckily dress clothing can be worn much longer than normal clothing and still smell nice/look normal. Wearing a beater is very important as to not ruin your shirts and make you more comfortable. Undershirts and long johns can also work if you need warmth. Polish your shoes every couple weeks or so and make sure they never have any dirt on them. You may need to clean them a lot. You will also want sock straps. There are two variations of this. One that just keeps your socks up and another that keeps both your socks up and dress shirt kept down. They look like this and they make you look a lot neater. Also make sure you iron whenever something gets wrinkles. And if you have pets get that little thingy that gets the fur off of your clothes
A tyre inflator that you plug into the cigarette lighter is also very useful
Edit: this is the one I got, $50 approx. Has a digital pressure display so you can check the pressure quickly as well. I've used it quite often and it's never blown a fuse.
It’s men who think being nice to a woman is the way into her pants. Typically, they are only nice to people they want something from. That’s why a lot of people view them as manipulative as well. This is usually due to the “nice guy” not wanting to sexualize the women, often in an effort to try to set themselves apart. Problem is, they forget women are sexual too and don’t necessarily disqualify someone for being insinuative. No sexual tension(I’m using the phrase loosely) means no attraction. They don’t realize this and because they were nice and expected sex in return, they lash out.
I think that’s what I’ve gathered over the years of hearing the term.
Software Defined Radio
For $30 you can get a USB dongle that will let you pick up all kinds of signals. ATC talk, plane location ADS-B data, standard AM/FM and shortwave stations, CB, all the power/water meters in your area, even pager traffic.
Check out /r/RTLSDR Half that subreddit is people picking up NOAA satellites, which is cool, but I'd start with the simpler stuff. Just pick up a local FM station and go from there.
Look at the different responses at the Ray Rice and Jay Z incidents. There are even"progressive"news sources that rationalize violence against men. Whats even worse is when us men speak up for our rights we get labeled misogynist.
This is really important! Child sexual abuse numbers are still way too high. Teaching your kids the correct terms for their body is a way to prevent it as predators/abusers typically use pet names. Teach your child if this happens to come to you immediately.
As for how to approach it, I know some people that use the book “It’s so amazing” with their nine year old. It is very detailed about both male and female bodies, reproduction, pregnancy, and birth. But, it also keeps it age appropriate so the kid doesn’t become uncomfortable. They make a younger and an older version too so it gets more detailed as it goes on. Talking about sex and the education behind it is so important. A lot of TED talks explain how to go about this well and I’ve found them really helpful. A lot of sex education comes from home and school. School information can sometimes show that sex is shameful, when it shouldn’t be! We need to teach our kids that from a young age. I know talking about it all is super awkward and weird, but if you don’t, google will(imagine a young girl typing in girl body or teen sex). Talking about it is hard, but maybe reading it is easier. I’ll attach the link for the book, and hopefully it helps! Good luck and you’ve got this!
Do nothing. Don't even give her an odd look when you see her again. Act as if it never happened.
Chapter 3 of a book I'd recommend to everyone is titled "Let Bad Enough Alone" and explains how trying to apologize or explain in situations like this only makes it worse, every single time.
Let it go.
I feel this. I have a neuromuscular disease called Duchenne muscular dystrophy (DMD). DMD progressively weakens your muscles, there's no cure, and it's fatal. I stopped walking by the time I was 16 and I'm starting to get to the point where I need to use daytime ventilation, in addition to nighttime ventilation. I'm 25 and people with my condition are starting to live into their 30s. I'm not sure how much time I have left.
This transition to daytime ventilation is scaring me, because it indicates that my condition is getting worse. So mortality has been on my mind more lately. At the same time, I can also see the positives. Even though I need more breathing assistance, my ventilator is portable and I can still go places, just with more logistics. This will help me live longer.
I'm turning to writing more to help me come to terms with the fact my life will be cut short. I'm trying to write a memoir that I hope will spread awareness about DMD, help others living with the disease, and to leave some kind of legacy behind. Eventually, I hope it will also help my parents, my brother, and my friends grieve.
I wonder if writing and journaling would help you think about your mortality too. There's a really interesting memoir I'm reading now that was written by a young woman with Cystic Fibrosis. She died when she was 25. The neat part is that she started journaling when she was 15 and had accumulated over 2500 pages. She planned to have her mom publish her journal after she died. The result is a memoir called "Salt in My Soul" : https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07K5ZNG2X/ref=dp-kindle-redirect?_encoding=UTF8&btkr=1
I had one who told me she wasn't feeling sexy because she hadn't shaved downstairs in a week or so, and she felt dirty and unyghenic. Jesus. I had to make a run for the closing grocery store to buy her shaving cream and lady razors
Unfortunately this has become a method used by some women to clear up competition in a job place so they can have the position they want.
It's clearly laid out (with step by step instructions) in this book.
Edit added a )
I used to put girls on pedestals too.
Look, first of all, you should ask the girl out on a date ASAP. As soon as you realize you want her for more than a friend. If you don't do that, you will only fantasize about her even more and put her on a pedestal even more.
Now, regardless of her response, the key part here is not being needy. In case you don't know, being needy basically means treating girls like you can't live without them and there is nothing else that is interesting but them.
So basically the key part is to not be needy. And not being needy means that you don't depend on someone else. You stop being needy by finding things to fill your time with and finding stuff that you enjoy doing. When you do that, the girls aren't even that important to you anymore. You know that you have a full life that you will get back to even if you don't get the girl. That is when you stop putting girls on a pedestal and realize that they are just other people and you can talk to them like that.
Edit: Models by Mark Manson is a really good book to help with neediness and there are some other real nice stuff in there too.
My brother is an Aspie and I recall my mom giving him a 'survival guide' for autistic teen (boys). I can't find the exact book nor do I know if it's also available in English.
A quick search led me to this book: https://www.amazon.com/Aspie-Teens-Survival-Guide-Aspergers/dp/1935274163. Like the reviews state, it may be helpful to both you and your son.
It's hard to give specific tips, as I do not know how his Asperger's affects him and where his difficulties lie. For my brother, my mom has had countless of conversations over social norms in respect to clothing, but especially hygiene.
Probably TMI, but he still will refuse to cut his finger nails short (sensitivity issue). So, to help, he now has a regular appointment for a pedicure (at home), which has helped tremendously. The same went for my brother's dietary behaviour, which he also saw a dietician.
Don't be afraid to get your son help/outsource certain aspects of his wellbeing (presuming this is financially possible). If your son is half as stubborn as my brother, going to an 'outsider' with certified expertise can be a big help, even if it's just once or twice.
I bought one of these and put it on the coffee table, they are pretty cool.
The fuel is ethanol so it doesn't smell or produce soot, it's totally safe to burn inside. It actually will help heat a small room too, and it just looks really nice. It would be a little expensive to burn all the time, but I light it when it's dark and it gets cold, it's great mood lighting and looks pretty classy. There's a bunch of different colors and styles too.
Get a body hair trimmer.
Something like this should do the trick. If you have a significant other who can help, makes it a lot easier.
I would say your best odds are either going out to socialize or meeting women online. I go to clubs or bars every weekend and I hardly ever drink. I also don't smoke and I've never even tried weed so you really cannot use that as an excuse.
I realize that you work most weekends but I work every day. If you aren't drinking then you have a huge advantage when it comes to waking up for work. I'm able to go out until 4AM on Friday and Saturday and still get to work by 10:30AM on Saturday and Sunday.
You can also try new hobbies and other things that include more women. Try meetup.com for some ideas. There are plenty of activities where you can meet new people and socialize.
Don't be afraid to make friends with other men either. They have female friends and coworkers too.
I have ADHD, as well, and got diagnosed going through a doctoral program. It is scary to think there are people out there that don't believe this is real... It's so real and impacts our lives everyday.
There are two great books on adhd and relationships that help you deal with that type of situation. I'll try and find them if you're interested in the titles.
Also, I had a wife (now ex wife) and my current Gf Who were/are so supportive of me and my adhd. Legit makes my day knowing they care enough to read those books and learn all about my quirks. I hope your SO will do the same for you
EDIT: Links to each book
Hope they help!
"Guns, Germs, and Steel" for an understanding of how humanity went from prey to predator once and for all.
"The Rise and Fall of the Third Reich" for the best overview history ever written of Nazi Germany.
And P.J. O'Rourke's commentary on "The Wealth of Nations" because Smith's original text is far too dense for my meager intellect but O'Rourke gives an excellent layman's understanding of the work (and Smith's other opus, "The Theory of Moral Sentiments.")
The cool thing is, when you stand up, you shift around a lot more. Yo have a much higher baseline of muscle activity, so you're never really stuck in one position. I have an anti-fatigue mat like this and i find myself playing with the different surfaces with my feet all day.
"bad posture" is a misconseption. There's no such thing as "bad posture", there's only too much of the same posture. So even with my standing desk (it's a sit-stand desk, actually), i lower it at times to sit, when i feel like it.
Enable yourself for constant movement.
To piggy back on this post. They also make a big pregnancy pillow in the shape of a 'C' I know I know..... pregnancy? It wraps around you. It is amazing. My youngest is 9 and I can't get rid of it. 🤣 There are lots out there but here is a link to give you the idea. https://www.amazon.com/PharMeDoc-Pregnancy-Pillow-Jersey-Shaped/dp/B01KIQH2VU
A steam iron.
Ditch the heavy iron and the board! You'll never be more than 5-10 min away from wrinkle-free clothes and that helpful little purchase tucks away nicely in your luggage or day bag when you're taking a trip.
When we were first dating, my wife baked a lot and had this cookbook set
on her Amazon wishlist. It's basically a set of cooking textbooks for $500. They're really cool (showing the science behind cooking and all), but I couldn't afford it on my own.
I split the cost with my parents and got it for her for Xmas that year. It's been sitting on our kitchen counter for about four years now, but maybe some day she'll get bored and dust them off?
That came from data pulled off OkCupid and you can read more about this and other findings in Dataclysm, which was written by OkCupid founder Christian Rudder. It's actually a very interesting read and it covers trends in behavior beyond just that which applies to dating or attractiveness.
It's worth noting that the same data showed that a vast majority of men find women most attractive between the ages of 18 - 23 or so whereas women were pretty consistently attracted to men with a few years of their own age. There are also a lot of variables that affect what metric they're using to gauge "attractiveness" so I would take that figure with a grain of salt.
A large percentage of men don't even put much effort into their baseline appearance, either because they don't want to, don't have to, or don't think to. If we're talking about looks and looks alone, then I'm not entirely surprised. Maybe it's not 80%, but if you're comparing one group of people who have been conditioned to put a little extra effort into their appearance, to another that hasn't, or has even been discouraged from doing so, then I could see why perceptions of attractiveness would skew in one direction more than the other.
Basically, don't take a line from an OkCupid blog to heart.
Apparently you can get one on Amazon for $655.
> acne...literally means that the woman is unable or unwilling to take care of themselves.
Acne is mostly caused by hormones, genetics, and diet, not dirty skin.
My essentials are:
The Prince - Machiavelli
The Sun Also Rises - Hemmingway
The Wealth of Nations - Adam Smith
Flowers for Algernon - Daniel Keyes
One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest - Ken Kesey
The Old Man and the Sea - Hemmingway
East of Eden - John Steinbeck
Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep - Phillip K Dick
Franny and Zoey - J.D Salinger (even though I don't like Salinger)
Leaves of Grass - Walt Whitman
The Hitchhikers guide to the Galaxy Series - Douglas Adams
The Things they Carried - Tim O'Brien
Two Treatise of Government - John Locke
I can go on but these are pretty good and definitely help shape one's reality and what not.
Edit: I wanted to make one book recommendation for men that may not seem like essential for men but,
Kindred -Octavia E. Butler
It made me take a look at how women were/are treated then more specifically how African American women during the Antebellum era were treated, and I shouldn't have to tell you but....them sisters had it ROUGH to say the least. It will may make you woke AF.
Thinking, Fast and Slow.
It's a book about how we think, and the blind spots in the way we process and evaluate information.
One of the first insights that rocked my world is that our emotional control and our deep thinking processes don't necessarily use the same parts of the brain, but they do drink from the same well; if wear yourself out with one you impair your ability to do the other.
It changed how I approached my business and how much emotional bullshit I would allow into my life. I see overly emotional scenarios that aren't rewarding on their own as a direct impediment to improving my life and what I can accomplish in it.
This is about cancer screening, but does cover what you're looking for.
Also, breasts can and do swell on their own in the menstrual cycle and also during arousal, so not only will density vary from woman to woman, it may vary on the same woman.
Obligatory not a male, but I’m a female with a very strong gag reflex (which it sounds like you have) and any minor smell or texture can throw me into a gagging fit. When I go down on a guy, I always pinch my left thump down (see photo in link) because I’ve read that it gives your brain something else to focus on other than gagging.
I've been trying out an App called Headspace for the last month. I'm not normally into that kind of stuff, but I must say, I do find it to have a very positive effect on my anxiety level.
EDIT: For anyone wondering, it is guided meditation. Yeah, I know, meditation sounds like something spiritual and what not, but the concept is super simple. I recommend you try their free pack; it is 10 sessions at 10 minutes per day. Super easy to get into.
I once went on an 8 mile round trip, couple thousand foot elevation gain hike in the mountains with barely any water. I got so dehydrated, I barely made it back. It was the most miserable I've ever been. Never again.
Edit: I looked up the exact trail. It was actually 10 mile, 3,000 foot elevation gain. Wtf is wrong with me, dang that was a dumb move. https://www.alltrails.com/trail/us/california/mt-tallac-trail
Huh, the one I use makes some gnarly grinding noises, but never pulls or pinches. I can try to find out the brand/model if you're interested
Edit: it’s a ToiletTree TTP-TRIM-1, $17 on amazon
Lifetime Replacement Guarantee ToiletTree Professional Water Resistant Heavy Duty Steel Nose Trimmer with LED Light, Silver
No compensation or anything for this. Just used it for a couple years and it works, no fuss. Take the top off and run it under the faucet each time to rinse the hair bits out, and replace the AA battery once a year or so.
Don't buy those store 3, 4, 5 whatever razors for those crazy amounts of money, just buy a decent straight blade. They're so much cheaper, last so much longer and honestly give better results. This is one I got on Amazon and personally use for less than $10
> According to Popular Science, studies done on both cold-water swimmers and hospital patients have shown that people with a higher Body Mass Index (BMI) are less susceptible to hypothermia because fat insulates the body’s core. Article
So clearly higher BMI/body fat content does offer some insulation properties to core body temperature even if it isn't as efficient as blubber.
Roses de Chloe
I'm happy with my attractiveness. There are things that could be better but if I had the chance to roll some dice to get a random person's attractiveness, I can safely say that I would not do it.
If you're not convinced of your own attractiveness then why not hit the gym? Assuming you don't already. Get on a strength training program, gain some weight if you're underweight or lose some weight if you're overweight, and in a year or two you'll have an athletic physique, which certainly won't hurt. You do have a decent amount of control over your attractiveness.
Doesn't have to be this one, but it should give you an idea of what to buy. My recommendation is to buy more than one though because it never fails that something will go wrong with the zipper.
Probably will be buried.
Most people are posting about manscaping but I'd like to offer a method instead of just saying do it.
I use a product called magic shave powder, link below. It's like Nair but won't fry your skin and will leave you porn-star smooth. Just add water, stir until it becomes creamy and apply to area for 5-10 minutes. Then just wash it off and watch the hair fall away. A trim before had would be best so you can get the cream onto the skin.
Trust me, it works amazingly. Link:
Had a person hit my car door just as soon as I finished stepping in my car.
There was\no damage to my car and a group of people we laughing at him/her as he /she sat at the intersection upset that his/her mirror was damaged.
Then he/she speed off.
That's when I decided to get a camera.
I got the Viofo A129. last week and installed it over the weekend. It's easy to install and has a great picture quality.
I've watched several videos (front and back, side to side) and am very happy with it. I might even start my own youtube channel just to upload random (more than likely boring) videos. (but if I were to do that I would get a video editor to change camera angles)
I just hope that I never have to use any videos as evidence. (even if its not for my own protection)
She suggested I should develop using Java instead of C++. I was a 17 year old boy who had Bjarne Stroustrup's The C++ Programming Language under my bed and she saw it, googled it and found that more people use Java. I was not going to have it.
I've started a new morning routine that is making me feel much better, plus helping me lose more weight.
In all seriousness, though, research by Caspi and Herbener (1990) supports that actually people married to a spouse highly similar to themselves showed most personality stability while people married to a spouse at least similar to themselves showed most personality change. The parent comment stating that they'd choose personality compatibility over looks is wise. There is likely more current research, however I am not presently interested in searching for it.
Personalities change over the course of relationships, but not nearly as much as people think.
Been single for about 8 months feeling that pretty hard man
Edit: everyone else who’s going through worse shit than me I feel for you. I’d reccomend two books if you are interested in getting your shit together particularly if you are a young male although these could help anyone of any gender or background in my opinion:
12 Rules for Life by Jordan B Peterson
Tools of Titans by Tim Ferriss
12 rules for life is more just a good book to read if you are lost and need a book to get your shit together while tools for titans is more of a reference book for life that you can look back on when dealing with a particular part of your life that is difficult. It’s split into 3 sections called: Health, Wealth, and Happiness. Each section has people who’ve really succeeded in accomplishing great things in those categories writing about said success. I wish you all the best.
Boys and girls learn differently. Boys are higher energy, more aggressive, and require more activity and movement to learn effectively.
Here's an interesting article on hippocampus development and how it differs in young boys and girls
> There are also biochemical differences. Boys have less serotonin and oxytocin -- hormones that play a role in promoting a sense of calm -- than girls. That's why it's more likely that young boys will fidget and act impulsively.
Which is to say that it is more difficult to force boys to sit still and even harder for them to learn in an environment where they're forced to listen quietly.
In these situations, boys are often labeled 'troublemakers' with less effort paid toward their education and more effort paid toward controlling and restraining them.
> Children should be allowed and encouraged to move around while they do their work. Leg tapping, standing, and doodling while kids read, write, or take a test -- activities often seen as distractions -- can help many boys learn.
These kinds of activities are often squashed with the goal of keeping classroom order.
No problems from the wife after 3 years. She does get them when she's on antibiotics, so that's kind of weird coconut oil isn't doing anything.
I use this: https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00DS842HS
Maybe it's the refined that does it?
Pomodoro really works for me but everyone is different of course. I also have distraction blockers on my browser like for example the "Forest: stay focused, be present" extension on Chrome. And I use mynoise.net to pick a noise generator/ background atmosphere that helps me focus. These are tiny things but they made a difference in my productivity (plus mynoise helps alleviate my tinnitus). You got this!
Norah Vincent interview for anyone who's curious. Skip to 9:25 if it doesn't do so automatically. The interview was about her experiences while writing "Self Made Man".
Read this book! It is not about becoming a dick to others but learning to stand up for yourself
No More Mr Nice Guy by Dr Robert Glover
"Nice Guy Syndrome" trying too hard to please others while neglecting one's own needs, thus causing unhappiness and resentfulness. It's no wonder that unfulfilled Nice Guys lash out in frustration at their loved ones, claims Dr. Glover. He explains how they can stop seeking approval and start getting what they want in life, by presenting the information and tools to help them ensure their needs are met, to express their emotions, to have a satisfying sex life, to embrace their masculinity and form meaningful relationships with other men, and to live up to their creative potential.
I once got really high and thought it would be hilarious to make this profile. But when I created the profile, I fucked up and accidentally set gender to female.
So I had created a profile less than five minutes ago. I had put that robot picture in as my display picture. The username is Robert for fucks sake. But because I had an (F) in the gender field, I received 3 messages in the five minutes between creating the account and filling out the first text field on the profile.
As a man, I've maintained profiles for 8 years now, and I can count the number of inbound messages I've received on one hand. Three. And one was a spammer trying to phish me
I made a Pinterest list for my girlfriend at the time (no longer dating). It's pretty much worthless but I keep updating it and this seems like a good place to share it!
This week's plan
Every Sunday I plan my week out. No matter what I do, I cannot muster anything effort to do anything on the weekend. Therefore, my life revolves around M-F. Being electronic, I can drag around things in case something comes up or I need more time on an assignment. The night before, I check to see what I'll be doing the next day before packing my bag.
I study in 1 hour blocks with 15 minutes for a break. I never do the same thing in a row, as I start to lose focus and get bored with a task. I move on to something else, then go back at it the next block if necessary. I don't leave the library unless I'm going home or to class. I'm taking a smaller amount of credits, as I wanted to see if this plan would work out before attempting this with a larger course load (it does).
ColdTurkey is essential to everything. Without it activated, I instantly go to reddit and procrastinate. You cannot uninstall the app while a block is in progress, nor can you stop the block early.
As you can see from my schedule, there's plenty of time to go out to eat and party afterwards. Of course, being the unsociable loser I am, I just spend that time programming or browsing reddit. I get a good night's sleep, I shower, I'm never late to class, etc etc. I found the tip that you should treat college like a full time job, thus I started to apply it. For example, if you have 3 hours of classes that day, spend 5 hours studying. Works wonders.
Plan out your week.
Pack for the day's to-do.
Use Cold Turkey. It notifies you when you can access blocked content again. This let's me know when my break is starting.
College is a full time job. Treat it like one.
Here! Even if you don’t end up buying, please let me know your impression. Good or bad. Embarrassed To Ask: My life with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and the Cognitive Based Therapy that helped https://www.amazon.com/dp/0578430223/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_AC8M492QB0WV2GGZS3BR
If you're looking for a read, check out this: https://www.amazon.ca/Meursault-Investigation-Kamel-Daoud/dp/1590517512
Its a re-telling of The Stranger from the perspective of the brother of the man who was killed.
Do you wear glasses? get better ones, without those scratches, and aren't bent.
Do you drink atleast 2 glasses of water a day? You are probably always slightly dehydrated. Drink more water.
Do you drink caffeine heavily in the morning but not in the afternoon?
its caffeine withdrawal, you should wean your dependence.
Do you work on a computer monitor all day? install flux.
Do you have good posture? Clench your jaw? Tension in your clenched jaw or hunched shoulders puts strain on you. stretch, reset, and try again.
Do you sleep at least six hours a night? If not, you should get more sleep its also wearing on you.
TLDR - Drink more water, drink less caffeine, don't get eye strain, and don't clench and slouch!
I think my favorite solution was the Shittens. A product I didn't even know existed. I'd have to imagine they are also far less porous than socks...
Potted plants are quite useful with regard to indoor climate.
Frame your posters to give them a more mature look. Also, make sure they actually reflect your interests. Are you a beer enthusiast or are your posters leftovers from "lul beer" college times?
My personal decorations all have stories connected to them:
Some poster prints of renaissance paintings and frescos I liked.
An art print by someone who got encouraged to pursue their dream of painting by the reddit community.
Hobby stuff: RPG dice, board games, chess boards, books.
Canvas prints of photographs I've taken
Things I'd like to add or my friends have:
A memory wall of photos in this style
Framed movie posters
Collector's editions and movie memorabilia
Postcards received from friends
Soothing white noise on headphones, reduce light 2 hours before bedtime (only look at screens if necessary, and if necessary, install F.lux), take melatonin pills and 5-htp, cold shower then drink warm milk, hop under blankets with earplugs, cover eyes with something. Then stay awake because of racing thoughts about a fight I didn't have 3 years ago and the thought of how big the goddamn universe is.
Someone on Okcupid did a great study on this. You can find it Here
Basically, someone posted the same profile under 10 different accounts, but each account had a different photo. Unattractive guys got 0 messages. The most/more attractive male got 38 messages. Attractive women got 100's of messages and less unattractive still got 40+ messages.
Yes, I'm part ape. My asshole hair is crazy. It can compete with some of the most dense rain forests. But, yeah. I suffer from a similar problem. The way I combat this is... washing my crack after I shit.
I pretty much have a poop schedule at this point in my life. I Wake up, go to the coffee brewer, hit the brew button, and while my coffee is brewing I usually go take care of business in the bathroom.
After taking a glorious shit, I give my ass crack one or two wipes to get rid of most of the brown, then I hop in the shower and wash my asshole. Sometimes I use the shower head thing (I have one like this), which has kind of a jet stream feature. It's like a mini power washer. It allows me to get a good asshole-cleaning angle, and I'm not gonna lie. It feels good on my asshole.
At the same time, I'm a savage. After a couple of wipes, all that's there is residue. Nothing too crazy. So, I just go full barbarian and wash my crack with my hand sometimes. Like, fuck it. I aint got time to be scared of a little poop. Plus, I'm in the shower. I'm gonna rinse my hands off before I start completely washing up anyway.
Really though, washing your asshole after taking a shit is like the best thing ever, especially if you suffer from constant never-ending wipes. You don't use a ton of toilet paper. Your asshole is clean for the rest of the day. It's awesome.
Also, before you guys get all "Come on, bro. Other people might need to use your shower". I rinse the damn tub out after I get out. Also, I'm not shoving the shower head up my ass. So, it's all good. I just wash my asshole, and take a normal shower after. Nothing crazy.
Since there are a lot of Western books in here:
The Art of War by Sun Tzu. This is less a book about waging war as it about the logistics of planning large scale projects and managing people. It'll make you better at foreseeing problems and avoiding them.
Here's my crappy implementation in Haskell:
user@server ~ $ ghci
ghci, version 7.8.4: http://www.haskell.org/ghc/ :? for help
Loading package ghc-prim ... linking ... done.
Loading package integer-gmp ... linking ... done.
Loading package base ... linking ... done.
Prelude> [ if x mod 15 == 0 then "FizzBuzz" else if x mod 3 == 0 then "Fizz" else if x mod 5 == 0 then "Buzz" else show x | x <- [1..1100] ]
Here's the motherfucker right here:
You do pay fees (operating costs) but they're paid yearly and are typically tiny (often <0.25%), here is a good explanation from Schwab with a couple of examples.
Has he tried any of these home methods
The Mayo Clinic cites people having success with them, so maybe they would work for him?
Car air fresheners are designed specifically to cover up cigarette odors. They harken back to the days when cars had ash trays instead of cup holders, and working lighters for every seat. People would use lots of air freshener in the old days. That's why he's making that association.
I use this cologne as an air freshener.
Two sprtizs on the back of the seat maybe twice a week. Don't over-do it. doesn't stain upholstery or leather. Smells good, but not too fruity or flowery and doesn't have the chemical smell of many air fresheners.
Learn to manage the money that you have. Both budgeting AND consider looking at investing. Trying something like acorns (this is a clean non-referral link) is at least a start. Then you can decide if you want to try something more aggressive.
Limit how much "bad" food you have, as much as you can. Sugar is the worst (especially in things like soft drinks). I won't get into carbs, keto or any other thing. I just know that sugar is generally considered bad in almost every form of "eating better".
Stay fit in whatever way works for you. I won't give specifics because everyone is different but the general rule is to try and stay active. Try to not be too sedentary if you can help it.
I once met a girl in a bar and asked for her phone number. She gave me "a" number, no idea if it was hers as i never got a text back.
Fast forward a few weeks, she "liked" me on match.com. We stated messaging. Eventually she asked "were you at [event me met at prior]". I made the mistake of remembering and recounting too many details from that night. Yeah, she probably already knew, but until that point maybe she was willing to let first impressions slide.
I, a woman, cannot believe so many women fell for this shit.
What's it about? A 22-year-old college student who has never had a boyfriend (understandable), intercourse (understandable), or an EMAIL ADDRESS (WTF??? This is modern-day America and she supposedly made it through college having never sent an email in her life!), meets a billionaire/philanthropist/concert pianist/helicopter pilot/self-made corporate CEO who's 26 (WTF???). Together, he tries to be her dom, despite the fact that he doesn't listen to her, doesn't take into account what will actually pleasure her (he tells her, doesn't ask her), and just beats her to assuage his own demons.
And they supposedly fall in love. I couldn't make it past book 2, where NOTHING HAPPENS.
It's one of the worst books I have ever read in my life. If people want to read erotic romance, give Maya Banks, Shayla Black, Jaci Burton, or Lorelei James a shot instead. Much better writing and much better character development. This book was so poorly written it was laughably bad.
And women everywhere bought it. I'm embarrassed for my kind...
(Think I'm just being bitter? The Amazon reviews spell it out much better than I just did.)
EDIT: Fixed the link
The Art of War by Sun Tzu.
The book is a very short read (version I had was 68 pages), but I have gone through it multiple times. Everything in this book can be applied to every day life, just depends on how you interpret it.
> "If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle."
Ah bro my bad. I had erroneously assumed you didn't take initiative to hit her up again. Good on you for taking that chance tho. My thing is I'm so afraid of rejection/failure that I don't even try (mid 20s with a nonexistent sex life), so I'm kinda jealous of you.
Take this with a grain of salt – I would give her the benefit of the doubt but still keep doing what you're doing. If I could give you one piece of advice, it would be to read Models by Mark Manson. It's played up a ton in the seduction sub but it's actually all about making you a better, more interesting man and knowing how to be open and vulnerable, which in turn leads to those deeper connections that real women (not girls who tend to play games) seem to want. I'm going thru it now and while I have no real world anecdotes yet, it's definitely motivating to say the least.
This is what I bought my husband. He does HVAC so it's nice to not have the risk of a severed finger or electrocution. He's on his second-- they can take quite a beating, he likes fidgeting with them.
Read Models by Mark Manson. Always a good read after a breakup. Get you focused.
Get a haircut. Maybe even get a shave from a barber.
Focus on things you can improve on. Diet. Books you want to read. Set goals for the gym. Spend time with your bro's.
My old counselor when I was a kid had a few kids books on different family members being in jail (I remember this one specifically bc I loved bunnies as a kid but I'm sure there's more out there). There's also videos (Sesame Street did a segment) and online materials. Basically, be honest with the kid, but give her age appropriate materials to cope and understand
There is a self help book called "Nice Guys" written by a shrink who was a reformed "Nice Guy" himself.
My brownies are the best in the world. Just take your usual recipe but use olive oil instead of vegetable oil and don't use any nuts(even box brand is good). Pour the first half into the pan and then add mother fucking mini marshmallows. About one layer, you don't need to go overboard, and press them into the batter a little. Then add the rest of the batter. Push all batter flat and make sure no white shows through. Then bake as you would, maybe add an extra min or 2. They will be a little softer than you will expect. Then let them cool for an hour or so and then move into refrigerator. They will be ready to eat in like 2 hours.
If you follow these steps you will get those perfect brownies that are soft and sweet without being gritty and under cooked.
tl;dr: Use olive oil, add some mini marshmallows and refrigerate after cooling.
Woman here: You sound like a very caring individual, and while my first reaction was GTFO, I read other people’s comments who were suggesting you talked openly about your needs. Sometimes we assume that people do this by default, but it’s crazy how many couples go years without having a conversation about their actual needs.
Given your already stressful job, you say that you still go above & beyond after you come home (massages, sex, reading, etc.) to satisfy your partner. So instead of just GTFO perhaps thinking about all the actions you took that lead you to this stage would be helpful to reflect on, not only for this relationship, but in future relationships. I wouldn’t be surprised if you told us you often put your friends’ and family’s needs before your own.
I would strongly recommend reading this bookNonviolent communication (A language of life. It really helps finding ways to express your needs to others and ultimately understand that your well-being is just as important! Anyway, best of luck dude!
Nobody here has the correct answer.
Correct answer from previous Reddit posts answered by a nurse who's seen more people in the ER b/c of shaving accidents:
You can control them with an app/voice control/built-in schedulers.
I have them setup to simulate daylight for when my alarm goes off. I can just say "computer turn off lights" in my room and they're off. At sunset they basically mirror the functionality of f.lux which has helped my sleeping quite a bit.
And then there's of course party mode. I wrote some python to pick up on my mpd's audio out and change colors according to what it thinks the bpm is, etc
It's fairly frivolous, but I really enjoy the atmosphere.
I'm halfway to growing my hair out to this length, so I'm kind of in an awkward stage at the moment.
So imagine that cut, but on top it's half the length. I'll either sweep it to the side, or slick it back.
suggestive of the ancient Spartans; sternly disciplined and rigorously simple, frugal, or austere.
Here's a tip from an older guy: don't be a pedantic little shit, especially when you're not familiar with basic idioms.
New dad to a 1 year old here.
My good sir, allow me to introduce you to foot exfoliation peels.
2 Pairs Foot Peel Mask Exfoliant for Soft Feet in 1-2 Weeks, Exfoliating Booties for Peeling Off Calluses & Dead Skin, For Men & Women Lavender by Bea Luz https://smile.amazon.com/dp/B071JW3JG4/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_4k2tCb6ZMHQAJ
EDIT: Small tip for most of the balls problems get like MyPakage boxers. I fucking love them. I just got 3 more pairs. They are pricey but honestly worth it.
Currently reading Shadow Rising, the fourth book in the Wheel of Time series. Feel like I'd have enjoyed it a lot more in my teens than in my 20s but it's pleasant enough. He's not the greatest writer but I'm too invested to give up now, he's created a great world I'd like to see more of
Last week I read both Cat's Cradle by Vonnegut, which was as weird and as fantastic as I'd hoped for, and When Breath Becomes Air, a book written by a neurosurgeon about his experiences of being a doctor who was diagnosed with terminal lung cancer at 36. Both were excellent reads and I highly recommend them
Meditations by Marcus Aurelius, Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, Models by Mark Manson.
They'll teach you that just because a book is famous doesn't mean it's good. And just because people on the internet recommend books doesn't mean they've actually read them.
If you smoke, it's cheaper to wear new socks DAILY than to smoke two packs a week.
Over 28 days, you would spend:
how does 2 centuries of racist portrayals in popular media and culture sound to you
I catch the snowflake on the slide and cover it with a drop of glue then cover it with a second slide and put it in the freezer for a few days until the glue dries.
The size and shape is dependent on weather conditions. I didn't modify the snowflake, it fell that way. I created an app to help predict the snowflake type based on temperature and humidity.
This dude is joking, he's talking about adopting a goat instead of a human child. As /u/ptahhotep said in an earlier post, "kid" can also mean young goat.
I feel like that one which would seem more abusive coming from a woman would be an interesting conversation point. Care to share?
Edit: Okay, I dug through and evidently there are a few, but many are marginally (2%<10%) more likely to be viewed as abusive when perpetrated by a woman:
"Threatened to hurt a pet" (89% vs. 86%)
"Threatened to hurt themselves (61% vs. 52%)
"Used needed money for own addictions/ hobbies" (59% vs. 52%)
"Would not let spouse talk about their feelings" (53% vs. 51%)
"Refused to talk about problems (sulked, etc.)" (22% vs. 20%)
"Moved spouse away from their support system" (23% vs. 17%)
Out of three significant disparities (>10%) only one was free of obvious entry errors (yes, maybe, no =/= 100%):
"Insisted spouse answer every question they asked" (24% vs. ?5%)*(likely 65%)
"Played cruel jokes on spouse" (82% vs. 61%)
"Criticized the way spouse handled house/ children" (25% vs. ?9%)*likely 29%
So evidently the take home is that dudes get a pass on having a nasty sense of humor.
Bear in mind that this is out of 100 polled behaviors and the swing in the other direction (behavior seen as more abusive in men) is much more drastic. The article that OP is referring to is directly found here.
Learn to give less fucks. A a few metric shittons less fucks.
Treat yourself to a good book: https://www.amazon.com/Subtle-Art-Not-Giving-Counterintuitive/dp/0062457713
I bought myself this one, as recommended by my local kitchen store. Very happy with it
It's a good book, but I prefer this one:
Not Nice: Stop People Pleasing, Staying Silent, & Feeling Guilty... And Start Speaking Up, Saying No, Asking Boldly, And Unapologetically Being Yourself byAziz Gazipura
It goes more in depth about why are you a 'nice guy' and gives you much more practical advice and exercises to change it. Always found the latter lacking in No More Mr Nice Guy.
Read Models by Mark Manson
I'm serious, the book will change your outlook on social dynamics and relationships. None of the PUA bullshit. Just straight up honesty with yourself and others.
Also there's nothing wrong with considering every girl you meet as a possible partner. It's perfectly natural. We all do it.
Just don't be needy/desperate about it. There's a difference between considering every girl for that, however brief, and actually deciding "any hole will do" and going after every girl you meet without any filtering.
Read Models by Mark Manson and actually do what it says. That book took me from zero experience to my first kiss, date, losing my virginity and my first (very casual) relationship. It wasn't easy, and I'm still working on my self-improvement journey, but if that book can help me it can help anyone. I recommend it to every guy I know who struggles with dating.
I know what depression is like. It's a self-fulfilling prophetic thought-loop that you have to break. You blame yourself for failure, but don't claim your victories? I know you can do better than that, step up to the plate and own your failures, without them victory wouldn't be possible.
Go read "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl. It's not very long, yet extremely profound.
Not a book, but this is my stretching routine!
Also, something for joint mobility:
Costco keeps the costs low
That's 40 condoms for 14 bucks. If you need 285 condoms a year, fucking congratulations dog, you are slanging it.
You are mostly referring to situational depression which is tied to an event or circumstance in life that is eventually overcome or managed through will and/or time, vs. clinical depression which involves someone's brain chemistry and exists no matter the circumstances or what the sufferer wants. OP passingly mentioned that his wife suffers from postpartum depression, and listed things that are usually classic symptoms of depression, so maybe instead of writing her off as a lazy, gold-digging, stay-at-home bitch who's going against her word now that the kid is here, perhaps there are things going on in her head that can't be controlled without outside help, and that the first thing might be how to get her into the doctor and therapist's office and get her on the right meds, and see if anything changes.