What are
/r/ptsd's
favorite Products & Services?
From 3.5 billion Reddit comments
The most popular Products mentioned in /r/ptsd:
The most popular Services mentioned in /r/ptsd:
Headspace
myNoise
SemanticScholar
7 cups
WebMD
The Eye
AllMusic
AccuRadio
Warframe
Google Keep
SuperBetter
Nature Sounds
SimplyNoise
Healthcare.gov
calibre
The most popular Android Apps mentioned in /r/ptsd:
What's Up? - Mental Health App
Loop - Habit Tracker
7 Cups: Anxiety & Stress Chat
Booster Buddy
The most popular reviews in /r/ptsd:
It's a bit more on the academic side than self-help, but Trauma and Recovery by Judith Herman is very good and touches on that type of PTSD as well as others. I found it so helpful that I have the audiobook, ebook, and physical edition.
Deeply sorry to hear about your struggle. This sounds like a monumental amount of effort to deal with. Id highly recommend checking out this book to get a better understanding of trauma. Do you have a good support system?
Thanks for this, after looking at the website you provided I found one cheaper on Amazon, by a significant amount. I wanted the extra large blanket on sensory goods which was 58" X 80" and 21 pounds. With the discount code it cost 143.99.
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On Amazon I found this weighted blanket that was 60" X 80" and 20 pounds for 85.90. This is what I ended up purchasing.
Hey man. I can’t begin to understand what you’re going through. I went through some traumatic things when I younger but very different.
I’ve found this book really useful in my recovery. You might even have read it. https://www.amazon.co.uk/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748
Also, while I’m in therapy now, I did have break from it and found journaling really helped. Idk if you’ve tried it but I now do it alongside therapy and find it just as useful as talking to someone. Again - our experiences are different - but journaling has helped me so much to understand what happened and understand the past wasn’t my fault but I get to choose how the future goes. Writing pages and pages and letting the tears flow.
I wish you all the best man.
Hypervigilance, your survivor stress levels are high and your body doesn't want to be relaxed or unaware. The flashbacks and panics are your minds way of trying to get you to stay alert because it thinks you are still in danger.
Long term your best bet is therapy, EMDR, to help your body and mind you don't need to be stress and anxious all the time and you can relax.
But there are things you can do yous self.
I usually exercises during the day to help lower my stress levels, and get my hypervigilance under control. I try to practice mindfulness during the day too, to stay in my environment and out of my head and away from my fears.
At night, I try to set a good bedtime routine, I meditate to calm down, this app works great. If I need to I will use positive sensory stimulation to set a really relaxing environment, oils, incense, soft light, soft sheets, weighted blankets, relaxing sounds, etc. The nice thing about the sensory stuff is that your subconscious mind picks it up too so it helps you to stay relaxed when sleeping too.
General books but fantastic.
- The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel van der Kolk M.D.
- Waking the Tiger: Healing Trauma by Peter A. Levine
Male Survivor Specific - only because that's me.
- Victims No Longer by Mike Lew
- Wounded Boys Heroic Men: A Man's Guide to Recovering from Child Abuse by Daniel Jay Sonkin
Some off-topic ones I'd recommend (usually about $3.00 for each)
- Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (incredible)
- Enchiridion by Epictetus
Article I wrote that might be helpful:
EDIT: I can ask my wife for Women's books. she'll likely be able to name a dozen or so offhand. She helps run a group.
There is some good advice here. In the short term, you can try https://www.7cups.com/ when you need someone to talk to. It's a free online chat system with trained listeners and online therapists.
Good on you for asking for help -- it is so important and it will get you far if you keep doing it! I've spent a lot of years navigating PTSD...please PM me if you're not finding the help you need and I'll help you.
I'm about half way through this book and there are a few chapters that talk directly about what you just described...I'm really enjoying this book and find it applicable to me conceptually even though my experiences are totally different than hers, but yours experiences have some overlap closer so it might be a nice read for you. In particular she dicusses bonding and how that process of communication can get messed up through experiences and how to move forward towards learning how to bond well again and communicate your needs https://smile.amazon.com/gp/product/1982241349/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o02_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1
I’ve had similar triggers with using a mask as well. I bought these and they help quite a bit. I think they’re meant to help prevent make up and mask acne but for me they give a little more space between me and the fabric and makes the breathing feel just a little bit better. Highly recommend!!!
3D inner mask frame - make-up frame - Nose Mask Cushion - Shell Mask Sabage Mask Face - prevention of makeup loss Lipstick protection - washable reuse(White): https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08CY5KJNX/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_fabc_fm0YFbT90X3WQ?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
For me it's a matter of letting someone know (usually my wife) that I'm angry - doesn't matter what the cause of the anger is. The idea is that letting some of it out slowly like a steam release valve keeps the big explosion later. When things get bad, I have gone for long drives to remote locations and literally screamed at trees to get the worst of it out. You do get some interesting looks if another hiker comes across you, but it works.
Deep breathing and yoga are some help, as are some of the philosophy books I've read. My favorite two are The Enchiridion (Art of Living) by Epictetus (a slave) and Meditations by Marcus Aurelius (Emporer of the Roman Empire). Both are full of short bits of wisdom that basically teach you to control the things you can control and let go of the things you can't control - instead control your reactions to those things.
http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Epictetus/ http://www.quotationspage.com/quotes/Marcus_Aurelius/
This is def a thing. In fact it sounds like CPTSD - or Complex PTSD - which is what you wind up with in cases of prolonged past trauma(s).
I would get phone calls from my mother before I broke off communication with her and it would take two to three weeks for me to recover. That was for the easy stuff.
There’s a whole lot to unpack to be honest. Books and books worth. It takes a lot of cognitive therapy to get yourself right to be honest.
I learned about the book “Complex PTSD - from surviving to thriving” here on Reddit - you may check it out and see how well it applies to your situation.
If I were in your shoes, I’d look into what caused the trauma and find the right treatment/therapy for it. If the trauma was sustained emotional, sexual, physical abuse it may be different if say you were witness to a one off event like a serious act of violence, or of say you grew up in a war zone. I’m sure there is some overlap, but the therapy can be very specific.
Good luck. Stay open. Dog your heels in and get to understand your trauma. Often times the mind just locks up trauma to deal with later. That info can be triggered, or at times will just surface because it can’t hang onto it any longer and wants to process it.
Don’t bury it. Process it. I haven’t had much success burying things - I’ve always had to take them head on. Find the right course for you.
My psychiatrist put me on Abilify to help my Cipralex work. It made quite a difference for a few months but I started having side effects - I got Tardive Dyskinesia my tongue would involuntarily dart out of my mouth.
Oh! Oh! I have something for this!
There’s a wonderful researcher named Jane McGonigal whose made video games and health her focus. She’s written several books about gamifying your life for positive results, and discusses the benefits of playing them and how to employ techniques taught in video games to improve your life and overcome obstacles.
When I saw this, I decided to read her book SuperBetter. She devised this game/technique system after suffering with the after affects of a concussion! It even comes with a little app.
I still use a lot of of these processes, and they really help me. Maybe they could help you, too. :)
this might help....I bought this for my daughter who loves it.....
Hatch Restore - Sound Machine, Smart Light, Personal Sleep Routine, Bedside Reading Light, Wind Down Content and Sunrise Alarm Clock for Gentle Wake Up https://www.amazon.com/dp/B087M94WWW/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_EZ3WHQH19S1G4QBNKFX2
I would say no, It's not guaranteed for life. It's a hell of a hard thing to get past, but for the most part you can recover from it. Two books I've found instrumental to my recovery with PTSD and basically suicidal depression are the books "Psycho-Psybernetics" by Maxwell Maltz, and "The As If Principle" by Richard Wiseman. I dealt with PTSD for the last...9 years. I'm now at the point I'm mostly past it.
I'll link you the amazon pages for those books, they really are a wonder in of themselves.
Short answer, yes.
But it doesn’t necessarily mean the answer is medication either - meds can help suppress the feelings, but long term it isn’t going to be a ‘cure’.
Look up Belleruth Naparstek’s book about PTSD - good content in there about how talking therapy is often not the right approach.
Take care.
Edit:typos.
Hello! My friend is reading this book, and said it's really helpful.
https://www.amazon.com/Leaving-Fold-Former-Fundamentalists-Religion/dp/1933993235
We grew up in a cult, not fundamentalist christianity, but he said there are a lot of similarities. I don't know if it was the same for you, but I've found that being a kid that grew up in a cult is very different than being an adult that joined. Us kids are often trained to grow up fast, and as a result, it's easy to hide our trauma from everyone until we're at our breaking point. I looked for help for years before I got it- quite a few therapists thought that because I had a stable job and a relationship and a roof over my head, I couldn't be doing that badly. But I really was not doing well for a while- just walking around in a dissociative state.
I found a great therapist by asking around and specifically asking for a trauma specialist. Cults come with all kinds of abuse, and it takes a really qualified specialist in order to deal with us former members. My therapist doesn't have any history of dealing with my specific cult, but they've dealt with Mormons and Scientologists before, so they at least know the general lay of the land.
I feel ya. I only ever had unhealthy coping mechanisms, or rather mechanisms for not coping.
An app that I found helpful last time I experienced PTSD-triggered anger was the app "PTSD coach", developed by the VA (android link https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=is.vertical.ptsdcoach). There are tools for, among other things, managing symptoms of anger, sadness, disconnecting from people or reality, to name a few. Different exercises are proposed based on how distressed you feel, and the app is free.
It helped me calm down and stop spiraling. Hope it can do the same for you. Best of luck!
I posted this in another similar thread but it's fitting here too!
"Man's Search for Meaning", seriously, I've been told by countless friends, librarians, Psychologist, Psychiatrist, personal trainers etc. to read it for years. Finally did a couple of months ago, and now I know why.
Just about everything in that short book will apply to you in one way or another in the most comforting of ways. The author is very eloquent and very sensitive in how he writes in that it's an easy read considering the weight of the topic, if that makes sense. READ IT! PLEASE! or pm me your address, I'll mail you my copy! seriously!
Also, "On Combat" for the military perspective of PTSD. That's an insanely difficult one to get through, though also very well researched and written.
> it started PTSD crises
Yeah that seems to to a pretty universal thing, when you start recovering, you allow yourself to feel things you had repressed, and more triggers hit you. I'm still dealing with it, but I know I have to be patient and that it will get better. DBT skills help (though I haven't been practicing as much as I should)
I have not done many of the exercises on the book, because I have nearly all of the schemas and don't know where to start. But writing myself flashcards to use in a panic helps.
> She is at the point of almost 0 social contacts, so we are fine with that side... Thank God!
I recommend doing something about this even if it's hard. She might start with participating online, or joining the ptsd discord. Or a support group (I can recommend one). If she doesn't like to type, there's voice chat too. But I know it's not easy. How's her social anxiety?
Does she have a trauma therapist? I've only had therapists for anxiety and depression, it never helped because they didn't understand all my problems stemmed from PTSD which requires a different approach. So now I'm looking specifically for trauma therapy. With 0 social contacts, a therapist might be a good start for her.
Check the DBT Peer Connections youtube playlist on my Progress is Sweet story. Just listening to it calms me down during episodes. Also download the What's Up app and do the grounding exercises. She might not be able to remember to use it when she needs it but maybe you open the app for her to do it. Thank you so much for being there for her.
https://itunes.apple.com/us/app/whats-up-a-mental-health-app/id968251160?mt=8
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.jacksontempra.apps.whatsup
I think a single instance is something to take note of but not something to get too concerned about just yet. I mean, the brain is weird and does weird things from time to time. ( very scientific answer right? ). While I don't advocate seeking medical advice off the internet and am completely guilty of doing it myself, it does seem like if your Hypothyroidism just started a few months back, this maybe a rare symptom of it as well.
Again. One time deal can happen, but I would definitely sort of take note of it on a calendar and not pay much attention to it yet. Once it happens a second time, that's something to start exploring.
I've had a lot of success with Meetup.com. Because the social settings are typically well structured and geared towards welcoming newcomers it seems to be a magnate for geeks, social misfits, etc. You can join singles groups or interest based groups. I met the person I just married at a singles trivia meetup. There's also volunteering. I used to do a lot of that, and there's all kinds of clearinghouse websites for volunteer opportunities.
“The body keeps the score” is a great book on healing from PTSD
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma https://www.amazon.com/dp/0143127748/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_T7M2NC3HGSF4YFHR4GAS
Have you read The Body Keeps the Score? It is pretty much the go-to book for understanding the relationships between trauma and physical body reactions. (Sorry for the Amazon link if you are not an Amazon fan.)
https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma-ebook/dp/B00G3L1C2K
To be 100% honest, I have not finished it yet because it makes me cry and stop reading every 2-3 pages. But it is on the money.
I'm really sorry. It sounds like their actions triggered, reactivated, and added to trauma that you were already carrying around.
You say you want to move on. The best resource I've found for moving on is the book "Forgive for Good". This book teaches forgiveness as something for you, not the offender. It encourages you to remember, not forget what happened. It teaches you how to regain control of your emotions so that the offender's past actions aren't still controlling them. It teaches you how to be more present for the good things and people in your life, and make better decisions, and get the best revenge - moving on.
This all works to just some extent. If you have deep or many traumas (see r/cptsd), you may find therapy is the best way to heal. I love EMDR for that.
Take care. Feel free to message me.
Also, not too sure if the science behind this is legit but it seems to help me with stress and insomnia too. I put on headphones and listen to sleep, relaxation, or euphoria depending on the situation. It may be a placebo effect but either way, seems to make a difference.
Atmosphere Binaural Therapy - https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.peakpocketstudios.atmospherebinauraltherapy
Here is what I am using:
https://www.amazon.com/Brain-Forza-Organic-Mushroom-Capsules/dp/B00L1SNJGW
I have been using it for a month and I can definitely notice improvements. I just take one a day.
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Please read "Man's Search for Meaning" by Viktor Frankl. This book helped me find the strength to endure, and the wisdom to find meaning in the bad. I know it may seem like a probable dead end, but this book contains wisdom forged in darkness of humanity. I hope this book finds you and helps you, as it has helped me.
"Man's Search for Meaning", seriously, I've been told by countless friends, librarians, Psychologist, Psychiatrist, personal trainers etc. to read it for years. Finally did a couple of months ago, and now I know why.
Just about everything in that short book will apply to you in one way or another in the most comforting of ways. The author is very eloquent and very sensitive in how he writes in that it's an easy read considering the weight of the topic, if that makes sense.
READ IT! PLEASE! or pm me your address, I'll mail you my copy! seriously!
Also, "On Combat" for the military perspective of PTSD. That's an insanely difficult one to get through, though also very well researched and written.
Yes. Yes. Yes.
I was diagnosed with CPTSD, and have been traumatized by the family, by significant others, and now and especially the mental health and benefit system of the US. It really fucking sucks.
That said, I've been using a really great book to help me cope: From Surviving to Thriving. Seriously, it's pretty great and most of the reviews are like "this changed my life". Hang in there. I can't believe that this can continue forever.
> I wasn't angry.
Maybe you were and were not aware. I suggest you read this book. It was pretty brutal for me to read as a person with PTSD and repressed anger. Now, I express my anger healthily.
Your last two paragraphs reminded me of me a lot. Now I'm generally really happy and have a lot of friends and a lot of it was just learning to identify when I was angry and how to use that anger.
Please give the book a go, and don't put it down when it makes you see yourself so much that it hurts.
Just thought to share this, screen tearing made me search for something else then youtube emdr. Found this beauty. Better to turn the movement 90 then it's default.
I recommend the andoid app "Loop - Habit Tracker."
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=org.isoron.uhabits&hl=en
Lightweight, open source, ad-free, and super easy to use. It's helped me and my friend a lot in managing our screwed up lives. It reminds you of tasks at specified times, and you check off whether you've done it, delay it until later (you specify how long inside the program) or dismiss. If you dismiss, it will pester you the next day until you've finally done the task, then it will wait for the next interval to expire. For example, if I don't trim my beard in a week, it will begin bugging me every day about it, until I do it, then it will wait a week to bug me again.
It generates exportable charts to keep track of the strength of your habits, so you know how well you're doing. I use mine for everything from am/pm medication reminders, once weekly beard trimming and other hygiene stuff, twice weekly watering plants, tracking my alcohol consumption, changing bed sheets, replacing my bath towel, it tells me to go outside (and tracks how much I don't, because I dismiss that one a lot =/). It's a great tool and it can be transformative. It's tiny and works fine on the 7 year old phone I gave my friend when I got a hand-me-down from my sister.
One of the best designed, lightest, and most life-changing apps I've ever used. You just have to OBEY.
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/37i9dQZF1DWZd79rJ6a7lp?si=j1gyvSVFRQ6vFMJAHVnlog
I hope someone’s suggestions help you OP! ❤️
This is a great post for resources. I’m military here about to retire. I just published a self-care book and several chapters focus on self-recovery from PTSD. Check it out on Amazon. https://www.amazon.com/Self-Health-Andragogy-Self-Directed-Learning-Self-Care-ebook/dp/B09ZBMZJ91
Good.
I've posted so many times about the various books/resources that have helped me.
Love Yourself Like Your Life Depends on It was my starting point. It may have saved my life. My life I guess maybe really did depend on it.
The Boy the Mole the Fox and the Horse is my all-time favorite book. It has powerful lessons on every page.
Peace, strength to you.
Viktor Frankl - "Man's Search for Meaning"
He was a Jewish psychiatrist who survived multiple of the worst concentration camps of WWII. It's an incredibly powerful book. It's sometimes published under the title: "From Death Camp to Existentialism: Man's Search for Meaning". The dude actually figured out how to find meaning and purpose in his life from surviving the worst horrors of the Holocaust.
https://www.amazon.ca/Mans-Search-Meaning-Viktor-Frankl/dp/080701429X
I have some Bose noise-cancelling headphones for home use. they were about $300 and worth twice the price. they are amazing at blocking/filtering loud noises. some neighbors used to get drunk and blast their car stereo at top volume 15 feet from my windows, but I could barely hear it with the Bose. pretty good listening to music or a podcast, best when listening to a white noise app with sounds like train noises or an oscillating fan that cover high-mid-low frequency range.
I've also used these for work (I sometimes vacuum and use power tools) and they're good, not too costly and last for months -- https://www.amazon.com/3M-90716-80025T-Corded-Reusable-Earplug/dp/B00284DIPK/ref=sr_1_8?crid=4ZJ693DMQW50&keywords=ear+plugs+with+cord+for+work&qid=1656813711&sprefix=earplugs+with%2Caps%2C128&sr=8-8
might want to visit a gun shop. they'll usually have a range of quality earplugs at a reasonable price. and the staff will often be knowledgeable and make good recommendations.
Me too. My experience really distanced me away from the community (therapists, youtube videos) that celebrates mindfulness as a wonder tool. Mediation, relaxation exercises, even hot baths triggered panic attacks. I came to understand the body processes trauma in the 'rest and digest' phase, which explained why relaxation often triggered these attacks.
I don't want to take meditation away from anyone who benefits from it, but its too hasty a leap to see it work well for mild cases of depression/anxeity and then recommend it for PTSD. Fortunately, some are beginning to recognize that PTSD might contraindicate mindfulness. Dr David Treleaven, who developed Trauma Sensitive Mindfulness, has written a good book and put out some helpful videos to bring awareness to these issues.
My therapist(s) have recommended a couple books to me throughout my therapy. I mention them because you and I have similar themes in our traumas. These books might be helpful starting points for you, just in thinking and reframing how you see your trauma and subsequent behaviors and symptoms. Maybe they can help you move forward, too, but the first step is reframing your thinking so that you know that it’s not your fault you have changed to be like this. You and I both adapted to survive our situations. We all did. Now we have to unlearn some very strong instincts. They’re extra strong because they’ve been reinforced by the repeated use, which just makes them get stronger and stronger. We have to teach ourselves that we’re not back in those traumatic situations. That we’re safe now. Our bodies are ready to notice tiny things that could lead to more trauma at any time. It isn’t a bad thing. It was a way to survive, but we don’t need that anymore. It’s important to be kind to yourself when the symptoms come up. (I’m working on all these things, too, so it’s not like I do these perfectly. I feel like I’m also telling this to myself.)
Here are the books that I was mentioning in the beginning:
Running on Empty: Overcome your childhood emotional neglect, by Jonice Webb
Transforming the Living Legacy of Trauma: A Workbook for Survivors and Therapists, by Janina Fisher
Read The Boy the Mole the Fox and the Horse. There's a great exchange in there about storms.
Or, consider what meditation teaches: that thoughts are like a waterfall, that when you're standing in the middle of the waterfall, it's impossible to stand, but when you get behind the waterfall, you can see the torrent for what it is.
Thoughts come and go. They don't stay. Everything passes.
Or consider what Oren Sofer says in his great guided meditation on anxiety--think of anxiety as an acquaintance you see at a party. You can nod to it, acknowledge its existence, but you don't have to spend time with it. You can go spend time with the thoughts that lift you up.
Learning that you are not your thoughts is a huge step toward healing, because it helps you understand that you get to choose what you focus on, the same way you focus on the subject matter of a test when you study.
Mindfulness helps a ton.
Also, consider creating a lovingkindness mantra for yourself. I share mine with everyone--may I be happy; may I be safe; may I be peaceful, healthy, and kind; may I love myself and be at ease. When the anxiety hits--as it does for me in the mornings (stupid cortisol)--I tell myself it will pass and I focus on my mantra. By the time I'm done with my shower I'm mostly okay.
The Buddha was right--everything passes. Everything.
Please, little sister, go to therapy. You are complex and you are carrying a lot of guilt. You need help to sort through it all, to learn to recognize yourself as human, to love and forgive yourself.
Mindfulness might help. The Power of Now might help. Because the past is gone. It exists now solely in your head.
You need to take back your power. The power of loving yourself.
See, these feelings, after what you've described, they sound really normal to me. They are human. Which means you are human. Yet you have set yourself up with guilt, anger, blame, as a monster. And you're not one. That person who abused you was the person who was wrong.
Narcissists use emotionally available people because they lack self esteem. She used you. It doesn't make you a monster to be victimized. Just the opposite.
My guess is you feel a ton of anger; my prayer for you is that you'll learn not to aim it at yourself, but at the person who really hurt you.
Hugs always.
Yes, it’s PNES. There is not a lot of info relating CPTSD with it, but check out this book:
A Recipe for C-PTSD & PNES: A True Story of Determination & Hope https://www.amazon.ca/dp/0228851041/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_AJ8WVDXTN0EN2G81E6Q1
When my PTSD triggers started to make my daily life debilitating and unbearable I gave in to EMDR therapy. It may be something to discuss with your therapist. I wasn't receptive to it at first bit overtime and ad time goes on it has been very helpful. If you happen to read also check out https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748?ref_=d6k_applink_bb_dls It is a great book overall and helps understand alot revolving PTSD in general.
Just know you are not alone. Alot of us feel this way. Just know none of it is linear and it takes time if your willing to put the work in. I have failed ALOT and have been through so many storms. Still to this day its not what I hope it to be. But there are many of us that feel this way. Again you are most definitly not alone.
If you are going to do Emdr, this book is by the developer, skip the park about how she figured it out because it’s a little woo-woo
Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy https://smile.amazon.com/dp/1609619951/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_99KTXNDJKKV8F4P4XZBC
This is the other one that’s considered the gold standard
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind, and Body in the Healing of Trauma https://smile.amazon.com/dp/0143127748/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_i_5JYSTA5C80T1EH0YKV5H
For the future, this book teaches a method to place your brain in a state of alpha waves. If you practice the method taught in that book every time you get triggered, over time, you will quickly be able to exit the triggered state at will.
For the present, physical exercise is helpful. Partially, it is due to creating a state in the brain similar to alpha waves due to the release of endorphins. It doesn't have to be in a gym. Go for a walk or run. Play a sport. Roller blade. Higher impact cardio is particularly useful here, because it will get you high as a kite off of the endorphins.
Once triggered, you want to get your brain in a state of alpha waves as quickly as possible. This book has good training on how to get there. Once you can 'hypnotise' yourself easily, you can step off a trigger at will. Practice makes perfect!
For me, patterns in the floor, wood furniture, carpet, wallpaper, etc allow me to easily place my brain in an alpha wave state. The floors at Planet Fitness make it particularly easy, given it is black with multicolor speckles. I also have a stone and a couple of stone slabs I use for this.
in psychiatry, official diagnosis only matters for insurance claim.
Complex-ptsd is not properly recognized by many practitioners. It’s really common for people with childhood trauma to receive inadequate therapy and misdiagnosis. My favorite book on this topic is this
You may want to check r/cptsd as well
I'd say try some exposure to the things stressing you out, which seems counter productive when it upsets you, but it can help decrease your response to those sensations. I assume once you try something on, and it triggers you, you take it off immediately.
What would happen if you set a timer and ride the emotions out while practicing some self-soothing mindfulness excersizes, like controlled breathing and being aware of the sensations and your emotions? Keep breathing and do not act on the sensations or stop them, just let them be and remind yourself you are safe, it is just clothing, and you are not being harmed, and know you can take the item off when the timer is done?
Like start at 30 seconds if it's very overwhelming, increasing to 1 minute, 2 minutes, gradually increasing the time you can train your body to know it's safe.
There's a free app you can download for Android and Apple that is a pretty good resource for mindfulness training. Hopefully it might help.
The book The Evil Hours has one of the most comprehensive histories of PTSD I've ever seen. Morris covers the entire history, depictions in literature, different types of treatment and their limitations, weird trauma responses, post-traumatic growth, the sense of being alien to other human beings after trauma, and much more. This was the best book on PTSD I've ever read. As to your question, one of the things that I've seen people do to support trauma survivors is evaluating the impact of early trauma on health in medical settings by asking screening questions from the Adverse childhood Experiences study. Early intervention in trauma is key. Peritraumatic support is improving for both adult and child survivors, but we still have a long way to go. Good luck with your project. Here's a link to the evil hours book: https://www.amazon.com/Evil-Hours-Biography-Post-traumatic-Disorder/dp/1494509679
If you want to read a very real book by a real person about surviving trauma and how brutal that can be, check out Terrorist Attack Girl: https://www.amazon.com/Terrorist-Attack-Girl-Terrorism-Reconstructed-ebook/dp/B09PZDSQF7/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
This review sums it up well I think:
"This book is honest and unflinching. But it’s also hopeful.
When you’ve gone through something that most people can’t possibly understand, hope sometimes feels saccharine. Like something you can’t afford.
It’s not. This hope is complicated and grounded and messy. But it’s real and honest. And it’s there, ready to give you a lifeline.
You deserve to read this book. It is compelling and thought-provoking and also beautiful and joyous. It won’t lie to you, but who needs that, when the truth can save you?"
Different trauma but I've heard from so many different people in different circumstances that it has helped them process and move forward.
It really does get better and you are never alone. You should check out this book: https://www.amazon.com/Terrorist-Attack-Girl-Terrorism-Reconstructed-ebook/dp/B09PZDSQF7/ref=tmm_kin_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
It really shows both of those things and it's a true story.
Sure! I just bought a cheap one on Amazon. I have to put it on the lowest setting bc it packs a lot of punch. Auvon is the brand.
I bout the VNS attachments on Amazon too, they were the only ones I could find but they are making my right ear blister so I found another set on eBay I am gonna try.
Link for TENS: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07D58V8LD/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_N6YGCZNRXA8A411WXGQZ?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
No worries, i think you're supposed to use a TMJ splint but they cost hundreds, I personally use these https://www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B071X94G9V/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1 but have tried many others. Main things you need are something not too thick but strong enough to deal with the clenching. I'd recommend going to speak to a dentist (not easy for many reasons I know ! ) as this isn't a permanent fix, but has offered me some pain relief and hopefully does for you too!
Shoulder length layers look good and help prevent tangles for me. I’ve gotten lazy about haircuts since Covid though, so my hair is long now. It tangles easily, especially with the mask straps, scarves, and winter coats. I’m a white lady who uses detangling spray, shampoos and conditioners formulated for African American hair on and off, and it makes my hair so soft and it tangles far less; those have more moisturizers/oils in them. The drawback is that my hair falls too straight with more moisturizers, and since I have very thin hair it looks better with more body.
My favorite detangling spray is Shea Moisture Kids Extra-Moisturizer Detangler - Coconut & Hibiscus 8 oz. (Pack of 3) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01BERHEFG/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_i_ZED5V7WX1TXJJWZRWF4D It’s $10 at Target for a bottle.
Jack ass- there’s a book on emdr written by the women who developed it. The story about how she developed it is a little out there but the science and the calming techniques actually do work.
Getting Past Your Past: Take Control of Your Life with Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapygetting past your past
Here’s one of them that I use on a regular basis emdr or not - butterfly hug
You don’t have to be that dramatic with it , I used it at the dentists this week and just tapped my thighs .
I'm about to read this one. I'm new to this, too, and my partner wants me to understand.
Haven't read it yet, though.
They had patients in the ER (here where I live) who came in right after a trauma play Tetris and results show it prevented PTSD.
https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.tripledot.woodoku
I play this type of Tetris, it's not the original one but it still helps me. I read that puzzle games in general are great for us with trauma and stress.
TWO SOLID SUGGESTIONS:
Requires access to a laptop or other listening device and earbuds! Earbuds are important because they help block out other noise while you sleep - barking dogs, (a serious trigger for me), banging doors, trigger sounds.
1) Audio books. If I listen to an audiobook while I sleep, I wake up with my earbuds still in. If I don't, I have night terrors. (I'm sorry that it didn't occur to me sooner)
2) Podcasts - non political and non news related, otherwise, go to NPR podcasts and subscribe to all the freebies. Set them up to continuously play when you go to sleep.
3) Music, but not just any. Try Hemant Mattani, for instance. It's Indian so the percussion is a super mellow and unique hollow bounce. Each song is introduced with a bell/chime sequence. No words or angst triggers. http://www.allmusic.com/artist/hemant-mattani-mn0001350582/credits
I think this keeps your brain from running the same scenarios it's used to running whenever you aren't consciously inhibiting it. That background reminds it that it's not in the past.
edit: Math was never my strong suit. You can have the third suggestion free.
Piggybacking off this to add, OP you should read The Body Keeps the Score It explains the effects of trauma / childhood trauma on the brain and body.
I read a book called Running with Mindfulness that is supposed to help turn your running practice into a therapeutic effort.
>I read that there's a medication that can help with nightmares, so I'm going to look into that.
This stuff? It works well. Side effects are annoying though (dizziness at higher doses, more physical fatigue)
Be careful with Trazodone.
>The idea to not use electronics before bed might help though.
I was looking up how long the trial was for you and stumbled onto this page…
https://www.calm.com/blog/take-a-deep-breath#sleepstories
Calm has made available free audio tracks for select sleep stories, meditations, etc. I’ve listened to most of the sleep stories, but the only one I’ve finished is the Sleepy Sloth as my kid likes to listen to that one a lot, so they work for me.
I’m sure there are other apps and/or podcasts and videos that do the same thing or might even work better. I just don’t know because I stumbled onto this and have just kept using it because it worked for me. I hope you find something that works for you. And that the nightmares get better for you too.
This is a really good app for teaching meditation.
Exercise and mindfulness and all that just makes panic attacks less likely and less severe, but just remember if you're Frozen like that that's perfectly okay, it's just what your body needs to do.
If your therapist can't help you find the right person you could also try looking up in contacting local EMDR trauma therapists, you could just email them anonymously let them know what's going on and if there's anything they can do to help or if there's anyone they know that might be able to help.
I struggle with it too! This won't work for everybody, but I swear by mynoise.net to help with this. I've paired it with my sleep for 5 or 6 years now, and I still mostly just use Distant Thunder or Unreal Ocean. I think it's all free, and they have a ton of different sounds that help. Just depends on your preferences.
Other than that and headphones though, I haven't figured much else out. ADD meds seem to help too? I haven't been officially checked for that though, just a few trials with my partner. I hope you find something soon.
Time to write down everything for which you're grateful.
If you have PC or PS4 download Warframe, stay away from the world chat, go kill Grineer. Warframe has a great community and if you need help try the Warframe reddit, /r/Warframe or message me for help. Game is free to play and does not require PS Plus on PS4. It allows you to have pets and every time I want to off myself I get worried about my kubrows (space doggies), lol.
If you're a Supernatural fan, remember that the final season is on its way! You don't want to miss it!
Okay, if those don't work, try listing things that you want to do while you're here on the planet. Don't just list them, write out steps to get them done.
Sometimes none of the above works for me, so then I seek someone in much worse condition than myself and do what I can to help them.
Hi I know her stuff is used by the VA and it and similar used in studies. i will look for some info, I used to regularly read her log and she would reference studies using both her's and other's cds. here is a preliminary report on a study on using guided imagery with survivors of military sexual trauma - health journeys is the publisher of Naparstek's cds vut this does contain proper references to science papers:
http://www.healthjourneys.com/dukestudy.asp
google scholar - http://scholar.google.com/scholar?q=guided+imagery+ptsd&btnG=&hl=en&as_sdt=0%2C20&as_vis=1
sorry for the quick inadiqute response, will try to find more tomorrow....
I haven’t read through all the comments, but they sell waterless shampoos and many other products that are great without a shower. Now I know a shower is ideal, but having been in the hospital several times/surgeries and not allowed to shower, it’s much better than not since you struggle with it. Many products you can use in bed.
If you’re dissociating and having flashbacks in the shower and bath, that’s dangerous. At the very least have a shower chair. They aren’t the best, but helpful! I also have a Hitchcock shower curtain: UFRIDAY Waffle Weave Fabric Shower Curtain with Mesh Window, Heavy Duty Decorative Bathroom Curtain with White Pique Pattern, Spa-Like Hotel Luxury, Waterproof,72 x 72 Inches https://www.amazon.com/dp/B07WN2HQH8/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_6Y2F4325PWR6DZ732DTW This isn’t the exact one I have.
It might help, even if it’s just a little, with anxiety. I need to see the entire bathroom or I’m constantly looking out and getting water everywhere. I’m short enough that nothing shows just looking at it! I also have to leave the door open to my bedroom. It makes me feel a bit better being in there; maybe that’ll help for you if you’re able to do that, too.
there are other brands I want to try so shop around and do some research. I will try this lotion next.
Mo’ Maggie Magnesium Lotion - Highest Concentration of Genuine Zechstein Magnesium in a Lotion - Wholesome & Organic Opulent Oils & Shea Butter- 8 Fluid Ounces - by Mo' Natural, Packaging May Vary https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01MFA39FE/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_GEX774194CPN1KWX6WA6
I've had great success with this one I use it for spots and just spray on my stomach for normal absorption.
ASUTRA Topical Magnesium Chloride Oil Spray, 4 fl oz | Rapid Absorption | Relieve Muscle Cramps | Fight Joint Pain | Stress, Anxiety, Headache Relief | Pure Zechstein | Promotes Collagen & Energy https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01CKEBF48/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_api_glt_fabc_R1JB0ARK9J0JVE4W5T8T?_encoding=UTF8&psc=1
Here is a pack of 10 door/windos alarms for ~$19.
I've found Calibre - E-book management invaluable in managing my library.
Even then, I need nearly 50 Gb to store my collection. Some are massive e-copies of encyclopedias. but It's still a City Library worth of reading.
Good luck! You might like this white noise website, I use it to mask the outside world. If you have speakers in your room you can put in your earplugs and then really blast white noise.
Thanks! That's great stuff. If only my neighbour wasn't knocking down a wall right now! Look forward to giving it a proper try later.
Forgot to mention that Accuradio is pretty good too.
It could be C-ptsd - Complex post traumatic stress disorder, which is caused by sustained trauma, such as abuse (in any form) whereas good old fashioned PTSD is caused by a single traumatic event.
Generally, of course. There are strict rules for the mind.
There’s a cool vent diagram in this article that I find fascinating: https://www.semanticscholar.org/paper/A-critical-evaluation-of-the-complex-PTSD-for-Resick-Bovin/83e5bd4d8b4cc509585969b5a895f44be4483ca6
For note-taking, try Google Keep. It's quick, easy, and has a Reminders feature as well. :) Thank you for the comment!
I hear you, the pandemic is making things extra difficult nowadays as if getting appointments for therapy wasn't hard enough without it. I sincerely wish you the best in finding a good fit for a therapist for you.
I'll be honest, I had the same thoughts, but I found that after a year or so, memories I thought I'd never get back, I got back. And some, as you mentioned too, just felt hazy, maybe not even real. I think it's part of PTSD and our minds just not being ready. It's not to say you'll definitely remember, but it's definitely a possibility. EMDR is also good, I've heard, for PTSD therapy.
I'd suggest asking your doctor because when I mentioned meds for focusing, she prescribed me some. I forgot what it was called, maybe something like Adderall, or a more modern version of it. There are a bunch of options I'm sure, but your doctor would probably know. Whatever I took definitely helped me focus, but I only took it for a short while.
In the meantime, if you visit rainn.org, and use the chat option and try to talk it out, and also ask for resources, they can help you find something. Regardless of the "type" of trauma, they are really kind and always willing to help. Even if you can't necessarily remember.
I have PTSD from numerous traumas. None of my nightmares are directly related to my trauma. I've woken up fighting/punching and I've never been in a fight in my life. I am afraid to sleep because of nonsensical dreams of nightmare scenarios and it makes me feel insane.
Bedwetting beyond toddlerhood is actually a very common sign that someone has been sexually abused. It's embarrassing, but predictable. If you are worried it might happen again, there are that can be a bit less shameful than adult diapers. (They're kinda comfy, too.)
My therapist has started me on a "nightmare protocol" to reduce the impact of trauma dreams. I'd highly suggest talking to a professional as soon as possible.bed pads
If you’re worried about the IP address, a VPN is your friend. I use NordVPN, it’s $11.95/mo and has a built in ad block you can turn on which is real nifty. Works on computers using the same username too so that’s even cooler. I think you can have it on 6 devices per username, something like that.
Triggers are really hard to deal with. It's like being transported back in time to a moment that was incredibly painful. Now I don't mean visually necessarily, more like your body is there again because it's reacting the same way it did when the bad thing went down.
It takes a lot of time, a lot of work and a lot of support to learn to deal with triggers. When it starts happening, priority has to be helping your sibling to roll back from it and not get into full fight or flight mode. When you start seeing signs of distress, let them know they're safe and that everything's okay right now. Whatever the thing was that triggered them, take the attention off of it. The moment when someone is triggered isn't the moment to talk about why, it's the moment to create a safe space and distract from the memory. You can talk about it later when everyone's ready.
You could put on a funny tv show or make some tea or suggest something they like to do after they're feeling a bit calmer. It's really hard but try to stay calm and be an anchor for your sibling. Keep everything simple because they're overstimulated when they're triggered and they need time to regulate themselves. If they want to be alone, let them and check in after a reasonable amount of time. Getting triggered can be exhausting and time alone can help a person rest and regulate.
The Crappy Childhood Fairy is a great resource and Bessel Van der Kolk's book The Body Keeps the Score is so helpful and really helped me understand what is going on when I'm in that state.
Hope this is helpful. It's great that you're trying learn about this and to support your sibling. Connections and family are essential to healing and the fact that you're asking about it shows you care a lot.
Amazon has some awesome ones that work really well for my daughter, that are pocket sized. Just search pocket size fidget toys. Here's an example of one my daughter loves.
5 Pcs Simple Fidget Toy Pop Fidget Toy Mini Stress Relief Hand Toys Keychain Toy Push Pop Bubble Wrap Pop Anxiety Stress Reliever Office Desk Toy for Kids Adults (Mini Square) https://www.amazon.com/dp/B08Z786G91/ref=cm_sw_r_apan_glt_fabc_QKJ1AXTXG6QF6HH9SPRS
I HIGHLY recommend anyone with PTSD, especially those newly diagnosed, read The Body Keeps The Score by Dr. Bessel van der Kolk.
For me it's the definitive book on trauma / PTSD (I've read a fair few). I find it very well written, and it really helped me understand what was happening in my brain and body.
https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748?ref_=d6k_applink_bb_marketplace
This is what I got on Amazon they're perfect and nice and small.
My therapist said that I'll probably have nightmares "forever", due to the severity of the abuse I suffered.
But I've got some little strategies and they work many times.
I use an app called myNoise and listen to the sound of rain when I'm ready to sleep. I also use aromatherapy oils with a diffuser (like this one: https://www.amazon.com/Essential-Diffusers-Measuring-Aromatherapy-Humidifier/dp/B0794LRNW3), but not for the "therapy" part, just because I enjoy the good smell and it makes me calmer and comfortable.
My therapist also recommended Body Scanning and some other Mindfulness exercises.
Have you read Coping with Trauma-Related Dissociation? It's really long but I am learning a lot from it.
I've always wanted to try neurofeedback! I haven't been able to find any therapists around here that do it.
Of course! I hope you can find what you need. I just keep on learning too! I am slowly working my way through this book and I've found it useful as well.
I would consider cognitive behavioral therapy. It doesn't require you to "go under the hood." Instead, it focuses on reducing the feelings of anxiety and depression that arise, regardless of the cause. I found it immensely helpful in reducing my symptoms, well before I could even really admit to myself all the abusive and traumatic stuff that caused them.
Luckily, it's also pretty popular with therapists these days, so it might be a little easier to find a qualified provider than with other techniques. There a couple good books out there too, many of which are available as audiobooks if that's an accessible format for you? I'd recommend starting here - https://www.amazon.com/When-Panic-Attacks-audiobook/dp/B06XCNYQ8V/ref=tmm_aud_swatch_0?_encoding=UTF8&qid=&sr=
I'm so glad you reached out to this community. There is help out there, and things genuinely can get better, as trite and impossible as that may seem <3
Find a therapist. Telemedicine makes it easier. Specifically a trauma therapist. Someone who specializes in trauma therapy and skills. You can talk over the phone. Work on mindfulness skills. Dialectic skills. Cognitive distortions etc. Therapy can help us get out of our minds and gain control. I’ve also found listening to Tony Robins or Jack Canfield helpful. Have you read Dharma Punx dharma punxby Noah Levine? Good book with life lessons. Like box breathing. The Seals train with this technique. box breathing technique . Everyone’s journey is different. Just posting on this thread is a good start/step. Good luck. You are not alone.
You might be able to use a little technology to help. It doesn't matter if your fears are reasonable or unreasonable, I think it is important to do what you can to feel safe.
There are motion alarms and things you can get that you just place and arm. They are designed mostly for people who go to hotels and have some concern for their safety in spaces where they can't install permanent things.
I haven't used this product, but something like this:
https://www.amazon.com/EMDMAK-Alarm-120DB-Siren-Travel/dp/B01M0X4QM4
Someone recommend me this workbook/journal type of book it's called the courage to heal I haven't finished it yet but its more for childhood sexual abuse heres the link to amazon the courage to heal
I read this book:
Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires; The Respect He Desperately Needs
Maybe it might help.
This is the first one. Read it yourself first and you can decide when your daughter is ready for it. https://www.amazon.com/Sexual-Healing-Journey-Guide-Survivors/dp/0062130730
Another one would be "Healing From Hidden Abuse" by Shannon Thomas. It is more general purpose, but it greatly helps with the sense of injustice.
Depending on how severe the psychiatric impacts are, I would also add Complex PTSD by Pete Walker and Polyvagal Theory by Deb Dana. These books focus on how chronic danger creates incredibly caustic problems in our mind and body, and how to recover from them.
You aren't being dramatic and everything you are feeling is completely normal. It's a normal reaction to a trigger of a previous traumatic event. Heck, even coming upon accidents like the one you just experienced can be cause enough for PTSD. Be kind to yourself. That's a direct and massive trigger you just experienced.
If you don't have access to a good therapist, one good resource about trauma and healing from it is "The Body Keeps the Score" https://www.amazon.com/Body-Keeps-Score-Healing-Trauma/dp/0143127748
I would highly recommend reading it as I found it a helpful and valuable resource. I needed years of therapy. I've only done CBT but if I could go back into it, I'd be willing to try EMDR but I don't have the insurance to cover it. Maybe someday. I have my own triggers and also tend to isolate myself from the world. It's a fight not to self isolate so you're not alone in this. Keep doing the journaling, I've also found it helpful for healing or at least purging for some of the hurt that is trapped inside of me.
I also went through a bout of trying to self diagnose just to get a grip on what I was experiencing. And I too thought bipolar might fit my symptoms, (I even have a family history of it) but when I went to a psychiatrist they said it was psychological and that I should see a therapist. Mind I'm not saying you don't have bipolar or anything, just that it's something that should be professionally diagnosed.
We can't really diagnose you here, but it wouldn't hurt to check out Complex PTSD given that you've had so many adverse experiences. Pete Walker's book on the topic is amazingly helpful.
Some on here were saying that CBT isn't all that helpful for trauma, so you might want to find a therapist who specialises in it. EMDR, Somatic and Internal Family Systems are a few therapies that are more suited. But if you do think you have something neurological/biological going on it would be worth being professionally assessed. Something like bipolar disorder does require treatment as it can get worse left untreated.
I don't know of online therapy, per say. But I highly reccomend the app Youper. It's like a pocket therapist that you can talk to whenever you're having a strong feeling. They take you through how to come down. Life saver
Welcome to the community and thank you for sharing your story. I highly recommend reading The Body Keeps the Score. The author of the book Dr. Bessel van der Kolk is responsible for a lot of the research around trauma that he started with Vietnam veterans when they were being misdiagnosed with schizophrenia among other things. It helped me understand most of what I know so I can live with PTSD. I recommended it to professors who were interested in understanding how to better help me in class, and I had an attack I will never forget in class. He approached me and helped me better than anyone has, and afterward when I was thanking him he said it was thanks to a chapter from this book. I can't describe the joy I felt that he had actually read it, that someone else took the time to understand me and that it came in handy. This might prepare you for any kind of day she might be having, or at least help her understand how human it all is. Seeing his support come to action because he kept himself informed was very moving. Best of luck and don't hesitate to reach out again.
I got this book for myself:
It's intended for therapists, but so far there doesn't seem to be anything in it you can't do on your own. I've only been working with it for a few days and it's helped quite a bit already.
You sound like a great partner. Reading this, I still expected you to say something about not seeing a future with her if you can't be physical (simply because I've been in her shoes, and that has been said to me and a ton of my friends with similar pasts). I'm glad to see the root is you want her wellbeing.
Healing Sex is a book that helped me tremendously as a survivor to understand what happened, how to come back from it, and how to introduce other people into my intimate life. There's even a section for foreplay and sexual activities that are very subtle, slow, trust-building and it might help her to see them written down step-by-step so there's nothing spontaneous in your bedroom interactions. This can be an extremely helpful way for her to start learning what she's comfortable with, what her boundaries are, how to communicate them with you. Definitely start with a safe word! If you want to do more reading to understand PTSD, I highly recommend The Body Keeps the Score.
I have a habit of picking as well especially when I’m stressed out - scars, scabs, acne, toenails, spit ends on my hairs. I did find a fidget toy that helps keep my hands from picking. Small enough to fit in one hand and has enough random buttons and switches on there to press to keep me focused on something else. Look up the Chuchik Fidget Cube or you can also find it on Amazon here
There's tons of mask varieties such as the "festival" type that are scarf coverings of the nose and mouth, obviously not medical grade but meet the basic requirement for grocery shopping and whatnot.
iHeartRaves Seamless Face Cover Mouth Mask Scarf Bandanas Neck Gaiter - Dust & UV Sun-Protection for Festivals and Outdoors https://www.amazon.com/dp/B075NVWY8D/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_44Q9EbNM5JVZD
This is an example from amazon, though there are plenty.
Also, I find the cotton ones relieve my stress over my mouth being covered, but I doubt that helps with the ears.
Finally, if you're willing to put in the extra money there are some extremely comfortable options (the filters make it feel very easy to breath and the ear straps are very comfortable).
WEIO Cycling Mask with Activated Carbon Filter, Set of 2 Sports Cycling Masks for Running Walking Cycling https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0866RT3CZ/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_i_67Q9EbTGZPRQ8
This is another example from amazon, but obviously there are a variety of options for this as well.
Hope this helps :)